Open Your Eyes
by angel-castiel-rules-the-world
Summary: What if, at the beginning of season nine, rather than sending out an all angel broadcast, Dean turned to Crowley to save Sam instead? How would that change what happened, and what would Crowley ask for in return? After all, doesn't everyone deserve to be loved? Destiel, AU from season nine onwards. Based on the Snow Patrol song with the same name. Will contain sexual content.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello my lovelies. I know I shouldn't, but this idea came to me late last night and just won't let go. I've been thinking of writing a story based on this song for a while, but it wasn't until then that plot came to my mind. I hope you like this opening chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural nor any of the lines I have taken from the show.**

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 ** _'_** _All this feels strange and untrue_

 _And I won't waste a minute without you_

 _My bones ache, my skin feels cold_

 _And I'm getting so tired and so old.'_

 _Open Your Eyes – By Snow Patrol_

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Dean sat by Sam's beside watching his chest rise and fall and hearing the bleep of the monitors. The doctors had told him there was nothing they could do to save his brother. So that left it up to him to pull him from this fire. This was all his fault after all. It should have been him doing the trials, not Sam. Everything would be fine then. But no, berate later, right now he needed to think of a way to save his brother.

Moving from the room he made his way to the chapel to call the only person whom he knew would help him, or at least he hoped he would. As long as he was still alive and had survived the fall that was. Oh god, don't let anything have happened to Cas. But no he couldn't think like that. So instead he settled himself into a pew and placed his hands together, hoping that Cas would take this as a sigh that all was cool with them. Anything, to get him to help Sam.

"Cas, are you there? Sammy's hurt. He's hurt, uh, he's hurt pretty bad. And, um... I know you think that I'm pissed at you, okay? But I don't care that the angels fell. So whatever you did or didn't do, it doesn't matter, okay? We'll work it out. Please, man, I need you here." He whispered out. But when he looked round the church he saw no angel in a trench coat, and he heard no flap of his wings showing his arrival. As such Dean lowered his head and rested it on his clasped hands as he tried to think of some solution, any solution, to the situation he found himself in.

The thought of calling out to all the angels crossed his mind. Make one of them come and sort out this friggin' mess, but before he could open his mouth to utter the words he remembered that there was one other he might be able to help him right now. And he was in his trunk. With that realisation Dean stood and walked quickly from the chapel and out of the hospital to his car. Once there he pulled open the trunk to stare into the red rimmed eyes of Crowley.

"Sam's dying. If we make a deal, can you save him?" He asked without preamble. It was strange that he seemed to have come back full circle. Here he was yet again offering his soul for his brother's life, though this time he knew what he was getting into. At least there would be no surprises this time, and he wouldn't let himself break so easily. No, he would fight.

Crowley lay bound and ducked taped in the trunk where Dean had bundled him when Sam had stopped what he was doing. He was reeling with feelings, and he didn't like it, but that didn't stop them from being there. As such when he looked up at Dean he saw the sorrow in his eyes and pain at the idea of the moose dying radiating out of his body.

Now if he had been his normal self he would have jumped at the deal Dean obviously had in mind. The idea of owning Dean Winchester's soul was a dream come true to the old, extremely demonic king of hell. But after what Sam had done to him, made him see his weaknesses, his humanity. All he could feel for the man was a sense of sorrow and a wish to help, a wish to for Dean to be happy. Damn the loopy human blood. But the only way he could even try to save Sam would be by making a deal with Dean. But he could stipulate the terms. As such he nodded in reply to Dean's question.

"You save Sam and in ten years you get my soul right?" Dean asked, making sure that the deal was as good as he was gonna get from the demon.

Though Crowley's response to that made him frown. Because Crowley shook his head in a no.

"Then how many years?" Dean asked realising what it was that Crowley had issue with. He wasn't gonna give him that much time. But he could bargain. It was Sammy, he would take whatever Crowley offered if it saved his brother.

At that Crowley mumbled a reply through the duct tape, which Dean obviously didn't understand. As such he ripped it off with force, hoping the pain he had just caused would in some way comfort him in hell.

"I don't want your soul Squirrel, not as dirty and sullied as it is." Crowley said once he had moved his jaw around and got it working again.

"Then what do you want?" Dean asked in an angry voice. Just what was Crowley gonna ask of him? Though he knew there wasn't anything he wouldn't do to save his brother.

"The heart of an angel." Crowley replied looking up at Dean. He had seen a chance here. Dean deserved love and happiness, but Crowley knew he would never take it without a very large push. He could be the force. He could make Dean find his happiness, and it would be like a beautiful love tale in the end. The perfect romance.

"What?! You want me to go out and gank one of those asshats just so you can have their heart?" Dean spluttered wondering what the hell the king of hell would do with such a thing. I mean, what hell good was the heart of an angel?

"No Dean, I want you to go out and get one of those asshats to fall in love with you. Specifically I want you to make Castiel fall in love with you." Crowley stated clearly. This was his plan. Get the two of them to see their love for each other. Get them to see everyone deserved to be loved, even him.

"Why the hell would you want that?" Dean asked in such shock he didn't really process Crowley's words.

"It will be amusing to watch. Oh, I also want my freedom." Crowley replied, the shrug he gave reminding him he was currently bound in the boot of Dean's car.

"Fine, you save Sammy and you have a deal." Dean responded after a beat. He didn't care what he was agreeing to. He would do it. And hell Cas already loved him as family, so there really was nothing he needed to do to keep up his end of this deal.

"I'll give you a year to fulfil your part. If it's not done by then, then the moose will die." Crowley stated, making sure that Dean didn't try to weasel out of it by taking too long.

"agreed." Dean nodded, still sure that he had already fulfilled his part, Cas was family.

"Pucker up then Squirrel, lets seal the deal." Crowley said pushing his lips together and towards Dean in a kissing motion.

"I ain't kissing you." Dean responded in a disgusted tone. Though he knew at the back of his mind this was now demon deals were made, the idea of kissing Crowley repulsed him.

"Then Sam will die. Your choice." Crowley replied simply. Trying to make it seem like he didn't care about the outcome.

"Fine." Dean responded through gritted teeth and as such moved his head so that he could seal the deal with a kiss.

"Oh and by love, I mean complete physical and emotional connection." Crowley said just before Dean closed the gap completely. He wanted to make sure that Dean knew exactly what he was demanding from him.

And Dean, rather than replying to the smirk on Crowley's face at what he had just implied, instead closed the distance and slammed his lips on the demons, pulling him out of the trunk as he did so, removing him from any of the warding that might minimalize his power. He would think about the consequences later. Right now he needed to save Sammy.

When Dean pulled back from the kiss Crowley stretched his neck with a smirk on his face as he pulled his hands apart with ease.

"Well I must say Squirrel, it was good doing business with you. I'll be keeping my eye on your progress." With that Crowley disappeared leaving Dean to wonder just what he had agreed to. But right now that didn't matter, what did was seeing if Crowley had kept his end of the deal. As such he turned quickly back to the entrance of the hospital with the aim to go back to his brother's room. To see if Sammy was back from the dead, again. He would worry about what he had just agreed to do, what he had just condemned Cas to feel, later. One thing at a time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello again. I would like to thank those who have followed since I posted this story. Here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural, nor any of the lines I have taken from the show.**

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Dean arrived back in his brother's room to find him awake and alert, though he had confusion on his face.

"Dean what happened?" Sam asked when he saw his brother enter. He had no idea what he was doing in a hospital bed, but he felt fine.

"You got worse, so I brought you to the hospital. They made it better. We can go now." Dean replied moving quickly to grab Sam's stuff. He didn't want the doc to find his brother like this and start asking questions. He wasn't ready to tell Sam what he had done just yet, not when he wasn't completely sure of what he had agreed to himself.

"Okay." Sam replied pulling the tubes from his face and the needle from his arm. He knew he must have been bad for Dean to bring him here, but the less time they spent in hospital the better. Especially as he remembered Dean telling him the angels were falling. Yeah they really did have other things to be worrying about right now.

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And so Sam and Dean moved out of the hospital, making sure they weren't seen and soon were on the road. It was then, and only then, that Dean started to consider Cas. Not the deal he had made, he was still trying to put that out of his mind, but more a case of where the hell the angel was. He hadn't replied to his prays. Was he… dead? No he couldn't be. Dean wouldn't believe that. Luckily before he could think more on that idea his cell rang. Pulling it out he checked the number and saw it was one he didn't know.

"Who is this?" He asked in way of an answer, his defences up.

"Dean." Came the reply down the line in a voice Dean would know anywhere at any time.

"Cas, what the hell's going on?" He asked with relief that the guy was okay. That Cas was still alive.

"Metatron tricked me. It wasn't angel trials. It was a spell. I wanted you to know that." Castiel said, hoping Dean wouldn't blame him for what had happened.

"Okay. That's great, why don't you come and tell us all about it, we're driving down the-" Dean replied only to be cut off by the angel on the other end of the line.

"Dean, Metatron, he, he took my grace." Castiel said before Dean could tell him where he was. It would be no use. He could not get there.

"What?" Dean demanded. What did that even mean? Was Cas out there, all alone and powerless? Hell no.

"Don't worry about me. I have met one of the angels. I think I can help her." Castiel replied when he heard the alarm in Dean's voice. He did not want him to concern himself with him. No doubt he and Sam had problems of their own to deal with.

"Cas, I want you to tell me where you are right now. We're coming for you." Dean growled down the phone in his no nonsense voice making Sam turn to him with raised eyebrows. What had Cas got himself involved in now?

"Dean you do not have to-" Castiel started to say, only to have the other man interrupt him.

"Yeah Cas I do. Just tell me." Dean stated simply. He needed Cas with them. He needed to make sure he was safe. Sam was fine, he was fine, now he needed to know Cas was too.

And so Castiel did just that. Told Dean the address of the gas station he had found himself at before he hung up the phone and turned to Hael, the angel he had found.

"My friends are coming to help us." Castiel said with a smile to the angel. He would like to introduce her to them. To the Winchesters, the ones who had helped him see what was important. To not just follow orders but find joy in life.

"But what of the Grand Canyon?" Hael asked with a puzzled frown. Castiel had promised to take her to the place she made. She wanted to go there.

"You can go alone. But I must wait for my friends. You can do this Hael. I am sorry." Castiel replied with an honest expression on his face. He truly was sorry that he was not helping her. But with Dean and Sam he would be able to do so much more. He knew that. With the brothers he could find a way to return the angels to heaven.

But as Castiel turned his back on the female angel she picked up a piece of wood and smashed him round the head with it. Incapacitating him. He would not be leaving her alone. She needed him.

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Dean and Sam arrived at the gas station to find that Cas was nowhere to be seen.

"Where the hell is he?" Dean growled in frustration, though Sam was more proactive and managed to get out of the guy behind the desk that Cas had been taken by a woman and the direction she had driven in.

"Damn it Cas." Dean muttered when Sam shared this piece of information. He had no idea how to find the guy, but he had to try. As such they filled up the impala and headed out in the same direction as the angel had taken Cas, hoping against hope they would find there friend. The friend on who's shoulders, Dean realised with sudden clarity, rested Sam's wellbeing. They needed to find Cas, and they needed to keep him save. Especially as now he was practically human. How would that affect his deal? No he think of that later. First find Cas, and make sure he was in one piece. He would work out the rest later, like how he was gonna get him to love him, and how he would make him an angel again. Sone of a bitch. No, find Cas and get them all back to the bunker in one piece. That was his mission now.

And Sam sitting shot gun looked over at the determined look on Dean's face and wondered at it. He had never seen him this focused when it came to finding there friend. Though if Benny had been there he would have been able to tell Sam that he had. For Dean had the same look on his face at that point as he did in his relentless search of purgatory, and it was all for the same man.

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Castiel walked away from the body of the vessel of Hael. He was covered in blood and had pains he was not used to, but he had felt worse in his life. As such his only thought was to find a payphone and tell Dean where he was now. He had said they were coming for him, and Castiel had to believe that. He had to believe that his friends would find him and take him in. Help him understand all that was new to him, and help him fix that which he had destroyed.

But the angels blamed him for falling from heaven, and they would be after him. Did he have the right to put Dean and Sam in a situation where they were chased by angels? But even as he thought that, the memory of when he had disappeared in purgatory returned to his mind. Dean would not stop until he knew he was okay. He had proved that. So best to find the Winchesters, and together they could work out where to go from here. They could then work out if it was best to be together or alone.

Of course none of these thoughts truly mattered, because it was as he walked down the road to the nearest town that a car pulled up alongside him. A car he knew so well. A black '67 Chevy impala.

"Need a ride?" Dean called out of the driver's window with a smirk on his face, so happy to see Cas in one piece, even if he was covered in what looked like blood. From what he could tell it wasn't his own, and that really was all Dean cared about.

"Hello Dean." Castiel replied with a smile for his friend before he climbed into the back of the car.

"hello Sam." he said as the impala roared off down the road, taking the three of them back to the bunker, to the only place they all felt safe, the place the Winchesters, or at least Dean, called home.

"Hey Cas, how you been?" Sam asked turning to look at the newest passenger. It was with that that they exchanged their stories on their trip home, though Dean made sure that no mention of demons or demon deals entered the conversation. He was not ready for the two people with him, the two closest to him, to find out what he had agreed to with Crowley. Luckily Sam was so wrapped up in the whole angel thing he never thought to ask what had happened to demon he was trying to cure. And Dean, well he thanked god for small mercies, even if he knew that guy had nothing to do with anything nowadays. No, getting them all home. That was his next goal. Get them to safety, then he could think of all he had done, and all he would have to do to keep up his end of that damn deal.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Zelphy-SPN for the nice PM about this story. I would also like to thank all of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter and I just want to say, I can't remember when it is that Dean gets Crowley's number, so I am presuming that at this point in my story he doesn't have it. Anyway hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural, nor any of the lines I have taken from the show.**

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Dean walked through the door to the bunker with Cas and Sam close behind him to be narrowly missed by the crossbow bolt that shot in his direction.

"The hell?" he exclaimed, pulling the bolt from the banister it had become imbedded in.

"Dean? You're alive!" Kevin shouted, sounding relieved to see the hunter, and the two who were following him.

"Yeah, 'cause you're a crappy shot, Katniss." Dean responded making his way down the stairs so they were all on the same level. It was then that he took a good look at Kevin and realised he looked complete crap.

"Sorry. It's been a bad couple of days. I haven't slept, or eaten, I'm pretty backed up." Kevin replied making Dean just look at him.

"Okay, overshare." He muttered looking round at the state of the place. They were gonna have to tidy all this crap up now, just great.

"After we talked, this place went nuts, alright? There was some alarm, and all the machines were freaking out, and the bunker just locked down. I couldn't open the door, my cell phone stopped working, I thought the world was ending." Kevin continued to explain. Hoping Dean or Sam could tell him what was happening.

"Close. The angels fell." Dean replied noticing out of the corner of his eye how Cas flinched at those words. Damn it. He didn't have time for explanations. He needed to get the newly human guy cleaned up.

"The... what does that mean?" Kevin asked, his eyes turning to Cas as the only angel in the building in hopes he would be able to explain, it was them he noticed the angel was covered in blood. That wasn't a good sign.

"Nothing good." Dean responded to Kevin before turning to Cas and speaking once more. "Right, let's get you cleaned up and settled, then we can work out what happens next." He said with determination. Sort his family first, the world second in his mind.

"I would like that. The smell of the blood is not nice. Also my throat is dry." Castiel replied realising this as spoke. He also had a pain in his stomach, but he did not want to mention that as well.

"We'll get ya a drink and food first, then a shower. Fix you up a room and find you some new clothes. I think the ones you're wearing are destined for the trash." Dean responded putting his hand on Cas' back to guide him in the direction of the kitchen while looking over his shoulder at his brother and giving him a look, asking him to sort Kevin and the mess he had made in the room. A look Sam nodded at. Let Dean deal with the human angel, he would deal with the prophet.

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Once they got to the kitchen Dean opened the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water they had in there and turned to Cas.

"Here catch." He said as he threw it across the room, and the ex-angel managed to do so, just about.

Opening the bottle Castiel took a long drink of the cool liquid, liking the feel of it going down his throat. He also realised that he liked the taste as well, it tasted fresh.

"This tastes good." He said taking a look at the bottle as if examining it.

"You think that tastes good, just wait til you try beer." Dean replied with a chuckle, turning away from Cas to make him some food. He had found himself watching his friend in a way he never had before. Watching as his adam's apple moved as he swallowed. He had no idea why. But right now he needed to get Cas sorted.

With that he finished the sandwich and placed it on the counter so Cas could sit and eat it. And while he did so, Dean found himself studying the guy some more. Cos he knew he was soon gonna run out of things he had to do, and he would have to think about the deal he had made with the king of hell to save Sammy's life. He was gonna have to think of a way to make Cas fall in love with him. Son of a bitch. But before he did anything, he needed to know if Cas being human changed the game plan at all. If Crowley would want him to find another angel to be with. In some ways that would be so much better, he could find one in a female vessel for starters, but he knew, looking at his friend polish off the food he was given, that he would prefer not to bring another angel into the mix right now. Not when one of them had already tried to kill Cas. He didn't want to put him in that kind of danger.

"What now Dean?" Castiel asked pulling Dean from his thoughts. He knew little of the intricacies of being human, but with the Winchesters as his guide, he knew he had the perfect people to teach him.

"Now you shower. You're covered in blood. Come on." Dean responded standing and leading Cas to his room. He had some spare clothes the guy could borrow for now, they could get him some of his own later.

"Here's a tee, sweater and some pants, and a towel to dry yourself with once your clean. I'll make up the bed next door or any room you would prefer. Give you somewhere that will be yours." Dean said pulling the items from his draws and handing them over as he spoke.

"Next door will be fine." Castiel responded with a small smile at how helpful Dean was being. He liked seeing him like this.

"Right then. This way." Dean replied leading Cas to the showers. Once there he pointed to the different levers, telling him what they did, and showing him how to turn it on and such.

"Wash crap is in here, used whatever you like. And if you leave your clothes in the corner, I'll toss them later. Okay?" Dean finished his quick tour of the bathroom, showing Cas all he needed to know.

"Yes Dean and, thank you, for all of this." Castiel replied looking at the green-eyed man with a sincere smile on his lips. He had no idea what he would have done if Dean had not come for him.

"No problem Cas. I'll see you in the main room once you're done, okay?" Dean responded with a smile of his own. It was strange looking in Cas' eyes now, they seemed to show so much more than they did when he was an angel.

"Okay." Castiel replied, turning to place his towel and clothes down before starting to remove his coat.

With the Dean made quick exit, leaving Castiel to have his first shower as a human, and made his way to the room which would become Cas', grabbing some of his own spare bedding on the way. But rather than getting down to making up the bed Dean sat down on it, trying to think. He needed to contact Crowley, but how was he gonna do that? Well there was the obvious way, he could summon the bastard. But did he really want to bring that slimy ass here? No he was gonna have to do it somewhere else. Right, then.

With that decided he went back to the task in hand and made up Cas' bed for him before returning to the main room to find that Sam and Kevin had done a pretty good job on sorting it all out.

"So I'm gonna go out and get some supplies. You guys okay, want anything?" He asked as he passed through the room, pulling his keys from his pocket and not really listening to either of these replies. He needed to get hold of Crowley, luckily he had the summoning stuff in the back of his car. At least he didn't have to try and sneak that past his brother. Thank god for small mercies and all that.

And Sam watching his brother leave at a fast pace frowned. He wondered what had got into him, but then he shrugged it off. No doubt all that had happened, him being ill and Cas being human, had effected Dean a lot more than he was letting on. He was sure his brother would be fine soon enough.

When Castiel finally came out of the shower, he had discovered they were rather nice things to have when the body felt weary and as such took as long as he could in it, he discovered Dean's absence. But he accepted Sam's explanation of him going to get supplies. No doubt they would need much more now they had to feed him as well. He just hoped he was not being too much of a burden on his friends.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank thiscouldbealittlemoresonic for the lovely review. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **Okay just want to let you know this is an AU of season nine, and as such a lot of things that happened in the show won't be happening here. I may include the odd episode, but on the whole I won't be following the way it went on the show.**

 **Anyway here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

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Dean found an out of the way empty warehouse and prepared to do the summoning ritual to get Crowley here. It was kinda scary at how well he knew the damn thing by now. But that didn't matter, not right now. Now he needed to talk to the damn king of hell. Throwing the match into the bowl to call him fore he stepped back and waited, hoping Crowley wouldn't take his sweet time getting here. He needed to get supplies and get back. He didn't want anyone questioning how long he took.

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Crowley was staring down at the charred remains of Abaddon when he felt the summons. It was most inconvenient, they had just caught a traitor trying to bring the bitch back to life, and he would really prefer if that didn't happen thank you very much. He was the king of hell, and she was nothing to do with it. Issuing orders so the traitor was dealt with and the body removed to an undisclosed location he teleported himself to an empty warehouse to find Dean Winchester waiting for him. Oh bloody hell, what did he want now?

"what is it Squirrel?" He asked with a sigh taking a good look around to make sure that the moose wasn't hiding somewhere ready to try and kill him.

"There's a problem with our deal." Dean stated simply, hoping Crowley wasn't gonna throw him against a wall or some shit just for saying those words. He had felt it would be bad form to trap the guy in a devils trap and as such was taking a chance on whatever it was that had made Crowley make there crazy deal in the first place to keep him safe.

"No take backsies Dean. We sealed it with a kiss remember. You can't go back on that." Crowley replied tutting at him for even trying to back out of it now. No doubt the Winchester had found his dear friend, and didn't want to trick him into falling in love. Even if Crowley knew if he let himself Dean could very easily fall with him.

"I'm not trying to go back on it Crowley, it's just…" Dean started to say, but somehow the words wouldn't come out. This felt wrong, telling Crowley of Cas' weakness. It almost felt as if he was betraying his friend to the enemy, which he guessed in a way he was. Son of a bitch, why was this so damn hard? Why had he made this friggin' deal?

"Come on then, spit it out. I don't have all day." Crowley said belligerently, he had things to do after all. He was the king of hell, it required a bit of work.

"Cas ain't an angel anymore." Dean finally mumbled, hoping Crowley did not need him to repeat the words. Saying them once was bad enough in his mind.

"What?" Crowley asked in complete astonishment. Castiel was no longer and angel? Bloody hell, how did that happen?

"The spell that caused the angels to fall, it used his grace. He's human." Dean responded through gritted teeth. He just hoped Crowley didn't use this information to come after Cas now, though if he did he would have to get through him first. He would protect his friend with his life if he had to, and then where would Crowley's perverted little deal be?

"Really? So feathers is less feathered." Crowley replied contemplatively. It was not an outcome he had seen coming, but it was certainly an interesting new development in the lives of the Winchesters and their no-longer-an-angel angel.

"Yeah, so I was wondering how that effected… everything." Dean said hoping Crowley would understand what he meant by that. He would prefer not to have to say out loud what he had done. Just thinking about the deal was bad enough.

"It doesn't." Crowley replied after a beat. He quickly went over the contract in his head, and he had used Castiel's name rather than his species throughout the whole thing. This new situation would change nothing on his end.

"But you said you wanted me to make an angel fall in love with me." Dean responded with a frown. He didn't want to do anything and then find out it wasn't what he needed to do to save Sammy.

"Actually no, I said I wanted you to make Castiel fall in love with you. Him being human doesn't change that, though it might make your job easer I suppose." Crowley replied with a shrug as he thought over the repercussions for Dean.

"Yeah right." Dean responded sarcastically, rolling his eyes at the demon's words. He still had no idea how he was gonna get Cas to fall in freakin' love with him, no matter if he was an angel or human.

"Well if he's human he'll have human emotions, and human urges, ones I'm sure you can fulfil." Crowley replied with a smirk when he saw Dean narrow his eyes at him. Oh how entertaining it was to see Dean so squeamish about the idea of bedding his best friend. He would need to get over that before the year was out. That was definitely in the contract.

"Shut up." Dean growled at him. He didn't even want to think about kissing Cas, let alone anything else.

"You're going to have to man up Dean and do the deed for the deal to be complete. Don't forget that." Crowley responded with an edge to his voice to make sure Dean got the message. There was no way round that act.

"Fine. But I would prefer not to discuss it with you." Dean spat back. He would do what he had to, but he did not kiss and tell… much.

"Well then it's a good thing I really don't want to know the details then insisted it? Now I would advise you return to your fallen boy, you have only 364 days left by my count." With that Crowley teleported back to his court and back to dealing with how he was going to make sure that Abaddon didn't return, though he knew now at the back of his mind he had the new thought of Castiel as a human and what that would mean in the grand scheme of things.

* * *

Dean sighed when Crowley left. So it seemed there was no way out. He was gonna have to get Cas to fall in love with him. But he was gonna have to be subtle about it. He couldn't let his brother work out what he was doing. How the hell was he going to manage this? But no, he work out a way. He had to, Sammy's life was a stake, and that was something Dean would not risk, no matter what.

With that he turned and left the warehouse, taking the summoning stuff with him and throwing it into the trunk before he drove to the nearest grocery store. He had four mouths to feed now, and he would feed them well. He was actually kinda excited to see how Cas would react to different foods now he was human and needed to eat. And he couldn't wait to find out what would be his favourites.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Castielholmeshasthephonebox and Guest for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update. You are all awesome.**

 **READ THIS: Just to give you a head up I have changed to rating of this to M as I'm going to put sexual content in it. So be warned**.

 **Also I have noticed in the last chapter I said 264 days left, but it should 364. After all there are 365 days in a year. Oops. It is now corrected.**

 **Anyway hope you like this chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

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Dean returned to the bunker with the groceries in hand. As he made his way through the door and down the steps he noticed the three sets of eyes on him, yet he really only paid attention to one of them. Cas was looking at him and smiling, wearing his clothes which were a touch to big, Dean could see his hair was still slightly damp from the shower and he couldn't help it. Seeing Cas smile Dean felt the need to return it, and not because of his deal or any of that crap, but just cos it was one of the few times he had actually seen the guy look happy. But still, the deal was a there at the back of his mind, along with the knowledge he only had 364 days left. Now normally he would have left it to the last possible minute, but he couldn't do that this time. Not with Sammy's life at stake. As such he needed to start today, damn it, he needed to start right now. As such rather than going straight to the kitchen with the bags he stopped off at the table his family were sitting at and smiled his most charming smile at Cas, all the while making sure his back was to Sam. He did not need his observant little brother catching wind of anything thank you very much.

"How you feeling after you shower Cas?" He asked as gently as he could without raising suspicion in anyone's minds.

"I am feeling very well, thank you Dean. I think I am going to enjoy showering." Castiel replied with a happy smile that crinkled his eyes making Dean have to swallow at the sight. It was so friggin' human, and kinda adorable.

"Yeah showering is always good, especially if you share it with someone." He said in response with a flirtatious smile on his lips. He hadn't even thought about what he was saying, or who was listening to it. The words had just slipped out at the idea of Cas in the shower, with the water hammering down on him. Cas with his body all covered in soap. Of course the slight choking sound from behind him reminded hmm rather abruptly that if he wanted to keep this from Sam, he was gonna have to think before he spoke.

"Is that a common thing?" Castiel asked curiously tilting his head up at Dean as he tried to work out why people would share a shower. Were they short of water? Was it a way to conserve it? Should he have shared his previous one?

At that Dean just looked down at him and couldn't think of a thing to say. Well that wasn't strictly true, he could think of lots of responses to that, but none he wanted his brother and Kevin to hear. Luckily Sammy came unintentionally to his rescue.

"Don't listen to him Cas, he's just forgotten the fact the world is not a porno, again." Sam stated clearly, glaring at his brothers back. What the hell was Dean doing? Was he trying to get Cas laid again or something? I mean the guy had only been human for like a day. He really needed to give him a break.

"Ah Sammy, you know you love me." Dean threw over his shoulder pulling himself together before turning back to Cas and continuing, refusing to let Sam get another word in. He didn't want his brother's input into this thank you very much.

"So I got the ingredients for burgers, you like them right?" Dean asked to Cas, he was pretty sure he did. I mean when famine was around he ate like 100 of the things.

"Jimmy did, and I can see no reason why I shouldn't. I look forward to trying them." Castiel replied with trust in his eyes, putting the idea of sharing a shower out of his mind as just one of those things Dean said that he didn't really understand. He was sure he would work it out at some point. He was here to learn to be human after all, and Dean was the perfect person to teach him in his mind.

"Good." With that Dean reached out to squeeze Cas' shoulder and give him a soft smile before he continued his journey to the kitchen.

* * *

He felt at war with himself, he was disgusted with what he was going to have to do and seeing the trust in Cas eyes really hadn't helped. But another part of him, the part that had spoken without thought about sharing showers, the part that had imagined Cas in the shower. A part he hadn't even realised he had, revelled in the tingle he still felt from Cas' shoulder under his hand and basked in the smile in the ex-angel's eyes. Son of a bitch. Well at least if he cared for Cas too then it won't be so bad making the guy fall in love with him. It was then he realised what he was going to have to do. He wasn't just gonna have to make Cas fall for him, he was gonna have to pretend to love the guy in return, for the rest of his life. It was the only way that this deal would be fair to his best friend. He would swear himself to Cas. At least that way Cas would never be heartbroken by his deal. He could do that. He would have to do that. Cos that was the only way he could see that he wouldn't be hurting Cas in what he was doing. That would make it alright, right? So all he had to do was make everyone, including himself if he could, believe that he was falling for Cas while getting Cas to fall him. Simple… right?

With these thoughts going through his mind he put away the groceries. Once done he was about to return to the room to join the others, try and see if he could actually do subtle flirting, something he had so far failed at. But it was then he remembered he had told Cas to leave his dirty clothes on the floor of the shower room for him to deal with. Right do that first. With that in mind he made his way to the shower room and found Cas' clothes piled exactly where he had told the guy to put them. Picking them up he moved them to the side so he could go through them. See if there was anything he could recover. The shirt was done for, there was no way he was gonna get the blood out of that, but that didn't really matter. The tie was passable and it would save them having to buy Cas a new one for when they went on cases. Cos he knew if Cas was gonna be with them for the rest of their lives, there was no way they would keep him from hunting. Cas wasn't one for sitting on the side lines and all that. The pants weren't' that bad wither, he could probably wash the crap out of them. And then he came across the coat. The trench coat which was worse than when he had pulled it from that reservoir when he believed the leviathan had killed Cas. The coat he had carried with him, moving it from car to car, as a memento of his fallen friend. The coat he had given back when Cas remembered who he truly was. And looking at it he knew he couldn't throw it away. It was stupid and it was sentimental, but this coat, this represented Cas. He had been wearing it first time he had seen him, breaking through the door of the barn. He had shot holes in the thing. Damn this coat had been through so much, just like its owner. And there was no way Dean could bring himself to throw it in the trash as if it meant nothing. If he did that he felt like he would be throwing all Cas had ever done away with it. As if all of it meant nothing. Sure the guy had made mistakes, but who was he to even think of judging someone for doing that? His whole life was one friggin' mistake after another. With that thought he carried the coat, covered in blood as it was, to his room. Next time he went for supplies he would see if he could get something to clean it up. Yeah that was what he would do. Clean it up, make it as good as new, and then return it to Cas. Return it to where it belonged. With that he hide the coat in a box under his bed before returning to his job of getting rid of ruined things, and trying to save the rest.

And when he returned to the three in the main room he made no mention of the coat, only held out the tie to Cas, telling him that it was salvageable along with his pants. And Cas, seeing the item in Dean's hand smiled sadly before taking it from him with a thank you. He wasn't sure he would ever be able to wear the tie again. It was a sign of what he used to be, not what he was now. He needed to learn to be human now, and that tie, that was an angel's tie. But he would keep it, if only as a memory of what he used to be. He had seen humans, they kept mementos of their life, and this could be the first of his collection.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank horsegirl2430, giawinchester and Tmk13 (Guest)** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean settled down at the table with a beer in hand, having got one for each of the other guys there too, and proceeded to watch as they all turned back to the books they were reading. Could they be any more boring? Though at least if Sammy and Kevin were distracted he could try his hand at the subtle flirting thing. With that in mind he turned his attention to the Cas, watching him for a minute as his eyes skimmed the pages of the book he was supposedly reading, Dean wasn't sure if he really was, I mean the guy didn't seem that into it. So there shouldn't be a problem if he interrupted then really, should there?

"Hey Cas, what ya readin'?" He asked nudging the ex-angels elbow with his own so he could get his attention. Get those startling blue eyes to focus on him instead of some ancient text.

"A book about the magical practises of the Egyptian people." Castiel replied simply, looking up from the book he had no real wish or need to read. He knew enough of history, having been there for most of it. It was just that both Kevin and Sam seemed to be doing it, so he had decided to join in.

"Why?" Dean asked with a puzzled chuckle. Surely Cas didn't need to read this crap. Hell the guy probably knew more shit that they had written in this place. He had definitely lived long enough remember most of it.

"It is what humans do, is it not?" Castiel replied shutting the book when he realised that maybe Dean wouldn't agree with this idea. In fact he was sure Dean only ever read books when on a case, and only then when Sam didn't. He did not seem so keen on reading for fun.

"Hell no Cas. These guys are nerds. Don't be a nerd." Dean responded shaking his head sadly at his brother and Kevin, even though there was a warm smile on his face so Castiel knew he meant nothing by it.

"Then what should I be Dean?" Castiel asked with a frown, tilting his head in confusion, though he too was smiling. He liked this, talking to Dean like this. It had been too long since they had had a chance to do it.

"Be yourself Cas." Dean replied with sincerity. That was all he wanted. Cas to be himself. Well that and to get the guy to fall in love with him, but that was another matter, one better exploded when not in his brothers hearing. Because he knew, even though Sam hadn't even looked up, he was listening to every word they said. Speaking of which… Dean suddenly had a great idea. Or at least what he thought was a great idea. It would get rid of the need for subtly, which he really didn't understand, and get them out of the nerdy boy's hair.

"hey I'm gonna start making dinner, wanna help?" He asked as casually as he could while wanting nothing more than to get Cas into the kitchen, away from an audience, so he could start his flirtation for real with the guy.

"Of course Dean." Castiel replied with a smile at the idea that Dean wished his help. Of course humans needed to eat. It would be good to learn how to make food. With that they both stood, taking their beers with them, not that Castiel had even tried any of his yet, he just had it because Dean gave it to him. He did not feel thirsty at that present moment in time.

"Aright then. We'll leave you nerds to it." Dean said a wide smile on his face, and Sam listening didn't even design to give Dean a response. Hell he and Kevin would no doubt work better without his brother around to interrupting them. He could be so damn annoying at times. And hey if Dean wanted to take the lead in teaching Cas about humanity, then that was fine with Sam. the ex-angel and his brother had always been closer and him and Cas anyway.

With that Dean and Cas made their way to the kitchen. It time to teach Cas how to make burgers, the Winchester way. Or more specifically, the Dean Winchester flirting way. Yeah he could do this I mean what was that stupid saying? The way to a man's heart is through his stomach? Well then, let's see what Cas' stomach liked to eat.

* * *

Once they got into the kitchen Dean moved around with ease, getting all the ingredients they needed from the fridge and cupboards and setting it all up on the side where he could teach Cas how to prepare burgers.

And Castiel, well he just stood there, his un-opened bottle beer in hand as he watched the way Dean moved around the room. It was like this was Dean's natural place to be, which was strange considering for most of the time that he had known the Winchesters they had certainty not owned a kitchen. But Cas liked it. Liked seeing this side of Dean, happy and moving with a purpose other than killing something. Yes, he liked the more domestic Dean, it made a warm glow grow inside of him. The idea that this man included him in his family, it was more than he deserved Castiel knew, but he was just so grateful for all the Winchesters had offered him, without condition or thought. Just because he was one of them.

"Right then. I need you to chop the onion, real small." Dean said beckoning Cas over once everything was ready and handing him the knife.

Castiel looked at the weapon in his hand and then down at the onion in front of him. He had no idea how Dean wanted it chopped, or even how to begin doing such a thing to the round object.

And Dean seeing the confused yet serious look on Cas' face smiled to himself as he moved. He could have taken the knife from Cas and shown him that way, but as his plan was to flirt with the guy he went for the other way of teaching. As such he moved so he was standing behind Castiel and taking his hands he guided one to the onion and with the other he showed Cas the correct hold to have on the knife. Once Cas was holding it all right he slowly moved the knife wilding hand down.

"Like this Cas." He said softly into the ex-angel's ear as he showed him how to skin and chop the thing into the size they needed it to be. And even if after the first few movements he knew Cas had got it, Dean continued to show him, continued to stand behind him offering words of sweet encouragement into Cas' ear. His idea was that hopefully Cas would feel Dean's body against his and enjoy the connection. It would be a start on the journey they were going to have to travel, but he would not take any short cuts with this. Cos him and Cas, this was for life. It was then he realised that while Crowley may not have asked for his soul directly, he had asked for it in another way. In his request to get Cas to love him. Because the only way he was gonna do that was if he gave this guy his soul. But standing there, behind his best friend, helping him do such a simple thing as chop an onion Dean didn't care. His plan was what mattered, and if he found he kinda liked the position he found himself in, then that was a good thing in his mind.

Once the onion was cut Dean showed the ex-angel how to mix it with the mince he then instructed him on how much seasoning he needed to add before teaching him how to make the mix into burger patties. All of this was done with his hands over Cas' and his body pressed against his back. And while Castiel may have had no physical reaction that Dean could see to his presence, by the end of it Dean was as hot as hell. Damn who knew being that close to Cas would turn him on? But hey, he wasn't gonna say no. it was a definite plus in his plan to spend the rest of his life with Cas. At least it seemed his body found the guy attractive.

And Castiel, while trying very hard to concentrate on all Dean was teaching him, hoping to learn as much as he could from his human friend, kept finding the feel of Dean against his back, the brush of his breath on his check, and his words almost whispered into his ear, very distracting from what he was supposed to do. But he felt reluctant to ask Dean to move, though he knew he could. Dean had often, in the early years told him he was standing too close, and yet now, when it was Dean doing so, Castiel found he liked it. He liked the simple human contact of support Dean was offering him. He liked it very much.

Once the patties were made Dean showed Cas how to cook them, not wanting to take over as he instructed the man, nor did he want to walk away when it was obvious Cas hand the hang of things. He didn't want to end the contact they had, though whether it was because of his plan to get Cas, or because he really was enjoying it, he no longer knew nor cared. But he also didn't want Cas to think he didn't think he could do this. Couldn't do the simple human act of cooking. He wanted Cas to know he trusted him, even with a frying pan. As such as Cas cooked the burgers Dean found his hands moving from Cas' own to his arms, and from there going to his waist and hips. Holding him close as he looked over Cas' shoulder to make sure he wasn't burning anything. Though Dean was pretty sure the only thing burning in that kitchen right then was him. And now Cas was happily cooking the burgers he had time to think about that fact, damn it. Where the hell had this come from? He had never felt this way about Cas before, so why did he now? Was it because of the deal? Because he knew he was gonna be spending his life with the guy? Was that it? His subconscious's way of dealing with the situation he had put himself in? Make him find the guy attractive? Cos he knew that was what it was. I mean if this had been anyone else, anything else, he would have turned them around had kissed them senseless by now if not done a lot more against the kitchen sides. But no, this was a long term plan. This was for life, he had to build the love. And so instead as he watched Cas move his fingers abstractly stoked his hips, somehow managing to catch under the tee Cas was wearing so he could gently run his thumbs along the top of the waistband of the pants he had given him.

And Castiel, at the feel of Dean's fingers on his bare skin felt his heartbeat speed up, though he had no idea why. But he liked it. Liked the feel of Dean's stroking fingers, and he liked the feel of his heart pounding in his chest at his touch. He knew this was not the behaviour of normal friends, Dean had never done this before. Was it because he was human how? Was this Dean's way of showing him support, of helping him deal with all the new and confusing emotions and feelings he had and would likely experience in his new form? Was this just another lesson Dean wanted to teach him? Because if so he was very happy to learn.

But before Castiel could think of how to brooch the subject with Dean the burgers were cooked and Dean was calling Sam and Kevin in to grab their food while he filled buns with salad and other condiments.

* * *

Sam and Kevin arrived in the kitchen at the same time as Dean put the plates down and they dived in, murmuring complements after their first mouthful, all of which Dean directed to Cas, he had been the one to cook them after all. And watching he saw a faint blush grace Cas' cheeks at the words of praise, and Dean knew he would be spending a lot of the rest of his life trying to find ways of making that blush appear again. It was awesome and cute, and sexy, and so very… human. As such Dean found himself spending the rest of meal with his eyes trained on Cas. Watching him eat and smile, watching how his eyes widened in joy when he took his first bite of burger and took his first sip of beer, he knew he'd like that. And he watched him talk to Sam and Kevin about god knows what. Dean just liked watching him, noticing all the differences between the Cas now and Cas the angel, but he also noticed the things that stayed the same. The things that no matter what, would always be Cas. The tilt of his head when he didn't understand, and soft smile when he was amused. The blue eyes full of love for those around him.

And Sam sitting there eating his dinner and talking away noticed his brother's lack of contribution to the conversation, and when he turned to him he noticed why. Dean it seemed had other things on his mind, and looking at the smile on his face and the soft look in his eyes, it wasn't all about how to teach Cas to be human. There was something more there. Something he had very rarely ever seen in Dean's eyes. In fact, he was pretty sure he had never seen it in the way he was now. Because if Sam wasn't mistaken, his brother was suddenly realising he had feelings for Cas. About friggin' time in Sam's mind. He had watched them stare at each other enough to last a lifetime, and let's be honest, no one kept the dirty old coat of friend and yet Dean had done just that for Cas' trench coat, there was definitely more between them than Dean had ever let himself admit. If it took Cas becoming human for Dean to see that truth then so be it. As long as he finally did something about it. And hey, it could be highly entertaining to watch his brother trying to woe Cas, especially as he was pretty sure the ex-angel would no doubt be just as oblivious now as he was before to his feelings for his brother. Should he enlighten him? Na, leave that to Dean. It'll add to his entertainment.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank giawinchester and Perdition Raiser for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

When they had all finished their dinner the extended Winchester family, or more to the point Dean, decided that they should all put down the books and have some down time. Entertain themselves with something meaningless and very human. As such they all settled down in Sam's room to watch some random TV. And it was random, mainly cos Sam and Dean argued over what to watch. Dean not wanting to make Cas start in the middle of some series and Sam wanting to watch the latest Game of Thrones. It was finally decided by Kevin asking Cas if he had ever seen Star Wars, which of course the angel replied no too, making both Winchesters automatically agree that that was what they were watching, starting with the original movies.

As such Castiel sat through the three movies enjoying them though finding them highly implausible, as well as wondering why they were watching number 4, 5 and 6. He enjoyed how he found himself getting involved with what was happening to the characters, and when Hans Solo got caught and encased in carbonite he could feel his throat constrict with worry for the man. The emotions the movies caused in him were new, or at least some of them were, he found the worry a familiar feeling he had whenever Dean put himself in danger, which was most of the time. But the major difference was that even though he was watching actors on a screen with a made up story, he felt so much more than he had as an angel. It made him wonder how he would respond now if Dean was in danger. After all before he had always known he could pull him out of it if he had to. He would not have that luxury now, and yet Dean would still hunt. Still face down evil on a daily basis, how was he to help him now? How would his human emotions react to that? To the idea of Dean in danger? Even the thought sent his heart racing with what he could only assume was fear. But no, he didn't need to worry about that now. They were all here in the bunker, safe from evil. They were fine. He needed to learn to understand and control his emotions. He just hoped Dean did not go on any hunts until he had.

* * *

Later that night, once they had managed to watch all three movies they all decided it was time for bed. Castiel was partially falling over where he sat, he was not used to the idea of sleep after all. As such Dean found himself having to teach a very sleepy Cas about brushing his teeth and finding him some PJ's to wear, again from his own wardrobe, they would really have to go buy Cas some clothes, and soon, his wardrobe was only so large after all. Of course that would mean taking the guy outside, and Dean wasn't ready to remove him from the protection of the bunker just yet. Hmm, he would just have to do the washing more often then, and maybe he could steal some stuff from Sam, not for Cas though, he would wear it. It would be too big on Cas. And that was the only reason, and it had nothing to do with the uncomfortable jolt he had felt in his gut at the idea of Cas wearing Sam's clothes.

And so finally Dean found himself settling into his memory foam mattress (hmm, maybe he should get one of these for Cas as well. I mean the guy wasn't used to sleeping, surely memory foam would help him with that right?), thinking he had done a good job that day. He had done what he could to get Cas thinking of him as more than friend, and he knew that his body at least was up for more than friendship from the ex-angel. That was good, it was always good to be sexually attracted to the person you were going to spend the rest of your life with after all. With these pleasant thoughts in his mind he drifted off to sleep, not at all dreaming of a certain ex-angel.

* * *

But later that night Dean was pulled from his pleasant dreams by a strangled cry, he didn't think when he heard it. He jumped out of bed and grabbed his gun before he moved from his room, to investigate the noise that had awoken him. He then heard it again and realised it was coming from Cas' room. As such without thought he entered, hoping he wasn't going to be confronted by another angel, cos if he was, he had the wrong weapon to hand. But once he pushed open the door he was greeted with Cas moving around under the covers with an anguished look on his face. Of course, the angel had never slept before. Of course he would have nightmares.

"Hey Cas, wake up." Den said as he reached for the ex-angels shoulder and shook it, though it seemed Cas was a light sleeper because he awoke with his angel blade in hand held at Dean's throat.

"Well we certainly don't have to work on your reflexes." Dean said in to the darkness, hoping he could inject a cheery note into the room even while he made sure not to move, what with having a very sharp blade against his neck. Not his favourite place to have one, he preferred they stayed at the neck of the enemies.

"I am sorry Dean. I was having a nightmare." Castiel replied moving his weapon quickly when he realised who it was and what had happened. Turning to look down into his blanket covered lap he remembered what he had dreamt. It was strange, he had seen Dean have nightmares, he remembered clearly the nights he had watched him relive his time in hell in his dreams, but he had never thought much about them. And yet he had just had horrible thoughts of angel's chasing him and killing Dean to get to him. Hurting those he cared about so they could make him pay for all the pain he had caused. He couldn't let it become reality, and he knew he would not let it become reality. But right now he was just plain scared of the idea that it could.

"Yeah I guessed that. You okay?" Dean asked gently raising his hand to Cas chin and turning him so he could see his eyes in the dark. He wanted to make sure Cas knew he was here for him, he was always gonna be here for him. I mean he had had his fair share of nightmares in his time. He knew how shit they could be.

"Of course Dean. I am fine." Castiel replied, determined to not let Dean know how much the idea of him being the cause of his pain hurt and scared him.

"Right, is that and I am fine cos I know I ain't gonna get anymore nightmares, or is that I am fine, I can deal with this alone." Dean asked with the raise of his eyebrow as if he already knew the answer. I mean Cas was learning humanity from him, and let's be honest, he wasn't the best when it came to dealing with shit like this. He always pushed it aside or tried to drown it in alcohol, and he didn't want Cas following his example on that one. One functioning alcoholic was enough for any family.

"Does it matter?" Castiel asked tilting his head at Dean, neither of them even aware that Dean had yet to remove his hand and as such when Cas titled his head his cheek fell more into the other man's palm.

"Hell yeah it does Cas… look if it would make you feel better you can come share my bed, just don't let Sam know alright?" Dean replied unconsciously rubbing his thumb soothingly across Cas jaw in an attempt at comfort.

"Why?" Castiel asked, though he was asking about why Dean would ask him into his bed more than why they would not tell Sam. he did not understand why the human thought it would be better if he was with him, unless… no, Dean was not interested in sex with males. So why would sharing his bed help?

"When Sam was younger he always felt better when he had a nightmare if he shared my bed. And I know Cas, that it's better not to be alone when you go through this shit." Dean replied with a soft smile. Of course Cas wouldn't know that it was better to have someone with you, someone who could comfort you, who could help you see that it was alright. Not that he had ever had that, but he had always done it for Sam, he would do it for Cas too.

"And you wouldn't mind me sharing your bed?" Castiel asked just to make sure. He could understand when Sam was young, but he was a full grown man, even if he had no idea how to be one. Surely Dean would not be comfortable sharing his bed with an adult male, right?

"Hell no Cas. Your my friend. Whatever I can do to help and all that." Dean replied genuinely. In fact he liked the idea of having Cas in his bed, and not for any sexual reason, but more cos he wanted to help the guy. Reassure him that every was gonna be okay.

"Then... I think I would like that. Being with you for the night." Castiel responded slightly unsure of the words. It felt so strange to be was vulnerable. He was not used to being vulnerable, he had been an angel, the most powerful of beings, and now he was human. It was quite a change.

"Right then, come on." Dean said standing and holding out his hand for his ex-angel. He wanted to get back to his bed and get Cas settled, get them both the sleep they would need for what remained of the night.

With that Castiel stood as well and took his hand, letting Dean guide him into his room next door and to the bed. Then Dean arranged the pillows so they could have one each and they both settled down, and Castiel, feeling the heat of Dean next to him turned automatically towards the man, snuggling close to him for protection from the dreams. And Dean, well he found himself putting his arm around Cas and pulling him close against him. Letting him settle in the crook of his shoulder. With that they both fell into a deep, peaceful sleep.

* * *

And when Sam came by the next morning to get Dean for breakfast he found the still in that position, with Cas snuggled up to Dean's side and his brother holding him tight. As such he closed the door quietly with a smug smile on his lips. He decided to leave them to it. Dean knew where the kitchen was after all, he could get him and Cas breakfast later, when they awoke. And whatever they did between now and then was none of Sam's concern, though he was definitely going to store this up as something to use against Dean at a later date. On hell yeah, they just looked so damn cute together, ah hell, he should have gotten a picture, but too late now. He wasn't going to back, hmm maybe next time. And planning when he could get a photo of the sleeping pair Sam joyfully went back to the kitchen.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello my dears. I would to thank Perdition Raiser, MishaKicksAss and giawinchester for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **I would like to again re-iterate I have changed the rating of this story to M. That being said, here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean woke to what sounded like his door closing, but before he even opened his eyes he could feel the warmth of Cas still at his side. As such he squinted his eyes open, hoping not to come face to face with his brother or Kevin. But all he could see was an empty room, hmm, he must have imagined it. Worried himself with the idea he would get caught in bed with Cas. Of course he planned to spend a lot of time in bed with Cas over the rest of his life, he would just prefer that no one knew that right then. Not when nothing had actually happened. Of course those thoughts lead to ideas of what could happen between him and Cas in bed together, and as such little Dean made it known he was wide awake and ready for whatever fun Dean had in mind. Not that he was gonna jump the guy sleeping at his side. That would not be a wise idea in his long term plan. Long being the operative word. As such he tried to make his erection go away with thoughts of anything other than the warm soft body moulded to his side. He was just starting to succeed when he felt Cas stirring, and that really didn't help him. But screw it, he needed to think about Cas now.

"Morning Cas." He said gently to the waking man at his side, and when the blues eyes of the ex-angel blinked up at him he found he could do nothing more than smile with sincere affection in his eyes. He liked this, seeing Cas first thing in the morning, still muddled by sleep. Yeah he liked that slightly dreamy look in Cas' eyes. He liked it a lot.

* * *

Castiel woke to find himself wrapped in Dean's arms. He wasn't sure what he should do, should he move away and remove himself from the bed? But when he opened his eyes and looked into Dean's green ones he saw no uncomfortableness from the man. As such decided to take a minute enjoy the position he was in. lying next to the other man safe and warm. It was then that certain parts of his anatomy came into focus and he realised that he had an erection. He had never had one before, but he knew they came about when you were with someone you found physically attractive, and he was lying in bed with Dean. That was not good. As such he quickly rolled away from Dean, hoping he hadn't noticed the hardness against his hip. Hoping Dean would not question the bodily reactions that he did not understand.

"Hey Cas, were ya going?" Dean asked turning so he was on his side, using his elbow so he could look down into the face of his ex-angel.

"I am sorry Dean. I seem to have an erection." Castiel mumbled in reply, blushing at the implications of what he was saying. He hoped Dean was not too angry with him for this situation.

But all Dean did was chuckle. He was glad that sleeping with him had obviously given Cas pleasure, but he could see that the newly human man wasn't ready for them to have _that_ conversation. As such he decided to explain it away.

"No need to apologise Cas. It's human to have a morning boner." Dean said running his fingers up the inside of Cas' arm to show him he meant his words, and it had nothing to do with seeing how his touch would affect the aroused man in his bed.

"It is?" Castiel asked, somewhat breathless at the sudden touch of Dean's skin on his. He needed to stop whatever these feeling where he kept having around his friend.

"Yeah, it is." Dean agreed gently, moving his hand so it rest gently on Cas' chest, to see if that gained any reaction from the other man, he had missed the slight hitch in Cas' breath as he touched him. That was all, and it had nothing to do with him wanting to be able to get any knowledge he could on what Cas' body was like under his tee.

"How do I get rid of it?" Castiel asked turning to look at Dean, trying hard to ignore the hand on his chest. No doubt Dean had put it there just to show his support and reassure him. He doubted the man had any idea how it made his skin tingle under the thin fabric he was wearing. And that was strange. Why was his skin tingling? Was it because he was sexually aroused and Dean was a warm human body? Yes that could well be it.

"Well there are a few ways. First you can try and think of the most gross thing you can-" Dean suggested his fingers now moving of their own accord as they started to draw patterns on Cas' chest.

"Like what?" Castiel interrupted. He really wanted these feelings to go away, and if he could do so by thinking something, then he would like to know, now please.

"That I can't help you with Cas. You'll have to figure that out yourself." Dean responded smiling down at him as his hand moved lower and started to draw circles on his abdomen.

"Oh. The other ways?" Castiel asked, his voice starting to sound slightly strained, to him at least, due to the movement of Dean's hand, and yet he did not want to ask the other man to stop. He liked the strange feelings that were running through him at the touch.

"Well you can have a cold shower, but having one of them every morning ain't my idea of fun." Dean replied finally stilling his hand so that it was settled just above the waistband of Cas' pants.

"No, I can imagine it wouldn't be. Is there any other solution?" Castiel asked. He had enjoyed his shower the previous day and he would prefer to continue on with the nice warm ones if at all possible.

"Yeah, you get yourself off." Dean said in a low voice, his mind already conjuring up the image in his mind of Cas pleasuring himself. Damn that was an awesome image, if only he could see it for real. See how Cas looked when he came. The images in his head and the conversation they were having seemed to have driven all other thoughts from Dean's mind. Including the idea of a long term plan.

"I don't understand." Castiel replied with a frown, his deep gravelly voice having gone even deeper due to the desire and the sexual feelings coursing through his body.

"You masturbate Cas." Dean whispered, his eyes glazing over with thoughts.

"I understand the theory of masturbation, but I do not know what to do in practise." Castiel replied not being able to take his eyes from Dean's, even if he wanted to.

"I can show you if you'd like." Dean responded, moving his fingers slightly so that they stroked up the other man's erection, causing Cas to jump at the sudden burst of emotion and pleasure that coursed through him at the light touch. But Castiel knew that that was not what friends did. Why was Dean suggesting this? Was it some strange human joke? If so it was not kind to make Castiel feel these things he didn't understand not when Dean knew he didn't. But he did not think Dean would do that. Maybe he was just genuinely trying to help him. Unaware of what he was doing to him, yes that seemed the most probable reason.

"Dean." He growled at him attempting to glare at the man to make him stop but feeling he had failed miserably, the feelings were still there. This was not right. He did not want Dean to keep doing this. He did not want to feel these things for his friend.

And Dean looking down at the man next to him saw that in Cas' mind this was too much, too fast. He needed to rein in his own impulses here. This wasn't about him after all. As such he not only stopped stroking Cas' dick through his pants he also removed his hand from Cas' body, however much every cell inside him screamed at him not to.

"Okay, you think of a sexual situation that makes you hard, either porn or screwing someone you find attractive, and then you rub your hand up and down your dick. You'll soon find what feels good, trust me." Dean said pulling himself together and trying to find the best, most simple explanation to give Cas to help him deal with his current situation. After all he needed Cas to be comfortable with sexual feelings if they were every gonna have sex. And they were gonna have sex, that was not in question, especially considering from what he could see they would both enjoy it immensely.

"I don't know I find anyone attractive, and porn confuses me." Castiel replied with a sigh of relief that Dean's hand had left him. At least now he could think more clearly.

"Well as I said, I'm willing to lend you a helping hand." Dean responded with a flirtatious smile, though he kept said hand to himself. He wasn't gonna push.

"Thank you for your advice Dean. I believe I should return to my own room now." Castiel replied defiantly.

"Okay Cas." Dean responded with a smile though his body was crying out in defeat. But this was a marathon not a sprint. Soon, he would have Cas soon. But now.

With that Castiel climbed out of the bed, trying to adjust his pyjama bottoms so his erection wouldn't show and then he made his way to the door.

"Thank you for help last night Dean, it is much appreciated." Castiel said just before he opened the door, though he didn't turn to look around at the man he was leaving in bed. He did not want Dean to see that which the man had already touched, however strange that seemed.

"Anytime Cas, anytime." Dean replied, he had pushed himself up so he was leaning on both elbows to watch Cas walk away. You'd have thought the sight would have brought him sorrow considering how his body was feeling at the loss of the man next to him, but he found himself well compensated by watching Cas' ass, the material of his pants having been tightened due to the erection, and as such the pert perfection was on full view for Dean.

With that Castiel left shutting the door behind him. And with him gone Dean found himself falling back onto the bed with a groan. Just explaining things to Cas had made images appear in his head, let alone the touches he had managed to get in. And lying there, alone in his bed he let the images run riot in his head. Images of a naked Cas under him, moving with him, those blues eyes looking up at him as he sucked his dick. Oh man, he was now harder than he had been before. As such Dean took his own advice, and with the images of all it seemed he wanted to do to the ex-angel, and what he wanted Cas to do to him, in his mind he pushed his hand under the covers, and in an embarrassing short amount of time had come with the vision of piecing blue eyes watching him in his mind.

* * *

Castiel return to his room and sat on his bed thinking. He wasn't sure how to go about what Dean suggested, but he was human now and as such needed to learn. With that he lay down on his bed and pulled his erection from his pants, using his fingers to stroke it as Dean had done. And suddenly his mind showed him the look in Dean's eyes as he had touched him there and he felt his breath quicken. As such he took the other man's advice, and using images of his best friend, of his body, the one he knew so well having rebuilt it, he found his breath quicken as his hand moved almost of its own accord. It did not take long for Castiel to feel the sudden burst of… something rush through him as he felt the male reproductive liquid seep from his penis. So that was an orgasm. Castiel suddenly had a new understanding why it was humans liked sex so much. But then he came back to reality. He had 'come' using images of Dean. Images of his best friend. Dean had told him that he would need someone he found attractive, but surely, he couldn't feel that way about Dean, did he? Maybe it was just because he was the one he was closest to? He hoped so. Because Castiel did not believe Dean would be very happy if he started to develop amorous emotions for the man. That would certainly make his new life as a human in the bunker extremely awkward.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser and giawinchester** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Castiel soon pulled himself from the bed and went and had a shower, spending a long time in there, trying to rid his mind of what he had just done. Of the images he had envisioned as he brought himself pleasure, trying to make himself believe that he thought of Dean as nothing more than his friend. He had almost convinced himself that that was true, until that was he walked into the kitchen to find Dean at the stove humming to himself as he cooked… something. And seeing the man so carefree, even if he could only see his back, made the feelings Castiel had felt earlier come rushing back, making it horribly clear to him that he felt things for Dean that he really shouldn't. As such when the other man turned around and smiled at him in the doorway he averted his eyes. He did not want Dean to see the feelings in them and he knew he would be able to. Dean could always read his feelings.

"Hey Cas. I'm making pancakes, want some?" Dean asked smiling at the ex-angel as he came into the kitchen his hair damp from the shower, though looking him over Dean could see he was wearing the same clothes he had been wearing the previous day. Seemed he would have to find him some more.

"Yes, thank you Dean that would be appreciated." Castiel replied still not able to look at his friend as he moved to the breakfast bar and sat down, folding his hands neatly in front of him and keeping his eyes directed at them.

"Right then, coming right up." Dean responded cheerfully, though he was slightly confused at why Cas wasn't looking at him, but hey, maybe the guy was embarrassed about their earlier conversation. After all if their roles had been reversed he knew he would have been. So all Dean had to do was show that it didn't matter to him. Then maybe Cas would be back to the way he had been the day before, yeah that was no doubt it. As such he made sure to have a friendly smile on his face as he approached with the two plates and syrup. Time to ease Cas' nerves.

They started to eat there breakfast but a suffocating silence surrounded the room, making Dean feel the need to talk. As such he said the first thing that came into his head.

"Hey Cas, you know, humans change their clothes every day." Dean said in what he hoped was a jokey manner, with a smile on firmly in place on his face.

"I do not have any others to wear Dean, I am sorry." Castiel replied flicking his eyes to Dean and then away again, though he did take note of the smile and knew that Dean had not meant anything by his sentence.

"Hey none of that. It's fine you can borrow some more of mine." Dean responded with a frown when Cas refused to look at him. It seemed he was gonna have to talk more to get Cas back to how he had been before… well, before.

"I am fine Dean, I do not want to put you out." Castiel replied evenly. He did not want to take Dean's clothes, knowing that they had been worn by the man he was starting to believe he had feelings for. It was complicated and strange and made no sense, but he just knew he would prefer not to wear more of Dean's things than he had to.

"It's no trouble Cas, though we should probably go and get you some clothes of your own, as well as an anti-possession tattoo. Also you know of anything like the ones you carved on Sam and I's ribs? Somethin' that would keep the angels away?" Dean asked getting into the idea of taking Cas shopping and getting him all he needed, getting him ready to face the outside world. I mean sure he hadn't wanted to do it so soon, but the way Cas was behaving, maybe he would feel better in clothes he had chosen himself, ones that fitted him properly rather than Dean's spares. Hopefully it would help him adjust to being human.

At that Castiel looked up with a frown, though his eyes did not met Dean's, he seemed to be staring at the wall while he went through his stock of law and symbols.

"I believe there is one I could use. I will draw it after breakfast." Castiel finally responded to Dean, though he turned back to his almost empty plate without meeting Dean's eyes once more as he spoke, making Dean start to get worried about what he had done to upset Cas.

"Awesome. I'll see when I can book an appointment at the tattoo place for ya, and we'll go shopping then too, yeah?" Dean responded forcing himself to sound cheerful even if he was running over everything that had happened since they woke that morning, and starting to wonder if he had gone too far with Cas. Cos he could think of no other reason the guy wouldn't look at him, unless he had stepped over some line Cas had when he had touched him. Son of bitch, why did his libido have to take charge that morning why couldn't he had stuck to his long term plan. Damn it. Now he was gonna have to start all over again and be that much more careful with Cas.

"Of course Dean." Castiel agreed readily, if he had his own clothes and the tattoos he would be able to leave if he had to, if Dean ever found out about the feelings he was having for him. Yes that would be for the best. Make sure he had his own things so if and when Dean asked him to go he was ready to do just that.

"Right then, what do you want to do today?" Dean asked finishing his food, hoping Cas would look up at him as he pushed his plate to the side and concentrated solely on the ex-angel.

"I think I would like to help Sam and Kevin, if you don't mind." Castiel replied pushing his plate away as well, though he still refused to raise his eyes and look at Dean.

"Course not, it's your time Cas, spend how you want." Dean responded gently, though he let out an internal sigh at Cas' words.

With that the ex-angel smiled at his friend, briefly raising his eyes before he moved quickly out of the room. He needed to be far away from Dean while he tried to work out these feelings and thoughts he was having, and if he was with Sam and Kevin he knew it was less likely that Dean would touch him in any inappropriate way. He knew Dean, and he knew he would not do… whatever it was he was trying to do, while his brother was around. So as long as he stuck with Sam for the day it would give him some time to try and work out what was going on with his emotions and his mind.

And Dean watching Cas practically run out of the room cursed long and hard to himself.

"Well you really screw the friggin' pooch on this one Dean. Well done." He muttered as he stood to tidy the kitchen and clean up after the breakfast. How could he have been so freakin' stupid as to do what he had done that morning? No doubt Cas was now scared of him, and that was the furthest thing from what he wanted the ex-angel to feel. Damn it, how was he gonna fix this one?

Trying to find the answer to that thought Dean went and put out some of his own clothes on Cas' bed for him, not even noticing he had chosen his favourite tee for the ex-angel to wear. Once done he then made his way to the main room to tell him they were there.

* * *

Castiel had gone into the main room and nodded good morning to both Sam and Kevin and then pulled the biggest book he could find towards him so he could hide behind it while he tried to work out his feelings. He was so lost in his own mind that he did not hear Dean's return, but when he touched his shoulder to get his attention Castiel found himself jumping in the air from surprise and then he felt the warm glow coursing through him from the connection. A connection he needed to end, now. With that thought he twisted in his chair so Dean's hand fell from him and he turned to look up at the hunter, making sure not to look him in the eyes but rather concentrating on the hair just above his left ear.

"Hey Cas. Hmm, I've put some clothes on your bed." Dean said trying to smile, not wanting to let Cas see the hurt he had felt when he had moved so he was no longer touching him. He liked touching Cas, he had never realised how much until now when it seemed Cas was not so happy with the connection. Now Dean suddenly felt its loss.

"Thank you Dean." Castiel mumbled as he rose and quickly exited the room, trying to not make it look like he was running away, but all the people who remained in the room could see that was exactly what he was doing.

With Cas' departure Dean sat heavily in a chair and aimlessly pulled a book to him with a frown. He needed to think of a solution, and he needed to think of it fast.

And Sam, who had watched the whole interaction, anticipating some lovey-dovey eyes he could wind Dean up about, wondered what the hell had happened between them. What had changed from the cute cuddly couple he had seen that morning in bed together, to now where Cas looked like a scared rabbit caught in the headlights and Dean was frowning down at a book there was no way he could read as if he was trying to solve the greatest of the world's problems. But then again he was talking about Dean, the most emotionally constipated man he had ever met, and the angel who was completely oblivious to human emotion or interaction. Was it any surprise if they had had a moment of miss communication? That somehow something had got lost in translation? He just hoped Dean could work it out, cos Sam was in no doubt that it was bound to be his brothers fault, after all he was the one who had been a human for 35 years. Cas had only been one for like two days.

With that realisation Sam shrugged and turned back to his book, trying to see if he could find anything out about the angels falling. He wasn't gonna fix his brothers mistakes, Dean would have to do this one on his own. Sam was not getting involved. But even as he thought the words he knew that if things continued like this he was gonna have to do something, the question was, what?


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank** **Perdition Raiser and giawinchester for the lovely reviews.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

 _'The anger swells in my guts,  
And I won't feel these slices and cuts,  
I want so much to open your eyes,  
'Cause I need you to look into mine.'_

 _Open Your Eyes – by Snow Patrol_

* * *

It was early afternoon before Sam was fed up with it all. He was fed up with the way his brother kept staring at Cas longingly and how Cas seemed to refuse to look at him, pretending to be unaware of the stare though he hadn't turned a fucking page in his book for the last hour. So yeah, Sam had definitely enough. Damn it, why couldn't they just talk to each other? Was it really so hard? Apparently yes. As such Sam decided to give them something else to stare at. Anything to reduce the god damn tension in the room.

As such he slammed his book shut, making both Dean and Cas jump making them staring at him dumbly as they had obviously been thinking other things.

"Why don't we all go and watch the rest of the Star Wars movies?" He growled in a way that told everyone there that refusing his suggestion was not a good idea.

As such Kevin jumped up from the rock he was trying to read. In all honesty anything to take his eyes from that brain melting crap was good in his mind.

While Dean turned to Cas, to see what he said before committing himself to anything. He wanted to spend time with Cas, though in truth he would like it even more if the guy would look at him, at least once in a while. How could he have been so freakin' stupid as to do what he had done that morning? He needed to make Cas love him, and while Dean may well like the idea of watching Cas as he came, he really needed to rein in the sexual impulses. If he played this right he could watch Cas come every day for the rest of his life. He just needed to chill.

Castiel was well aware that Dean was waiting for his answer, just as he had been aware that he had spent most of the day staring at him. He did not understand it. Why was Dean doing this? Why was he so focused on him? What was going on? But that didn't matter right now. Maybe if they watched more movies Dean's attention would be diverted from him and he could find some kind of equilibrium, something that had been sorely missing that day, or if he was honest since he became human. But forget that. Yes, maybe he could arrange it so he could sit as far from Dean as possible. That would undoubtedly help with the strange feelings coursing through his body. Time to put some distance between them.

"That sounds like a good idea Sam." Castiel replied having made up his mind.

With that Sam led everyone to his room, but his plan was counter to Cas', and more in line with what Dean had in mind. He was gonna make sure his brother and the ex-angel sat next to each other, maybe at bit of causal touching and all that shit would give them the shock they needed to get their heads out of their respective asses and into each other's. Or at least get Dean's head out of his ass. Because Sam was sure that this was all his brothers fault.

As such it was with a strange version of musical chairs that they all sat down to watch the movies, though Castiel was destined to fail. Mainly due to the fact he was up against not one but two Winchesters. Therefore it was with some shuffling, and glares from Sam to Kevin, that Castiel found himself in the middle of the bed with Sam on one side and on the other Dean. Just where he had not wanted him.

Dean on the other hand was very pleased with the seating arrangements. It would give him a chance to touch Cas, get close to him, without it being obvious to the rest. He was surprised at how it had fallen out. He was sure Cas would try to avoid him, and it never crossed his mind that his brother knew what was going on and was giving him a helping hand. If it had he would probably have run out of the room as if the hounds of hell were at his kneels, again.

And so the movies started. Castiel determined to pay attention to them and nothing else made sure his full concertation was on the flickering screen. And none of it was on the man pressed against his side. The man who part way through the first movie tried to take his hand, the man who seemed to move closer and closer to him as the movies progressed, making him move closer and closer to Sam. Making Sam wonder if this was such a good idea after all. He soon found himself on the edge of his bed, and he knew he would fall off if this continued. But he couldn't say anything. However much he wanted to just bashed Dean and Cas' heads together. Subtly was the key here. He didn't want Dean to know he was getting involved. He doubted his brother would appreciate that much. He probably thought he was keeping all this secret. Bloody idiot that he was.

Dean was seriously frustrated as the movies went on. He had tried to take Cas' hand only to have the other guy remove it as if he had been burnt. And when he had tried to press closer to him he seemed to move further away. If Cas moved much further Sam would surely be aware that he was avoiding him. Damn it. He would have to think of something else. As such Dean settled in to pretend to watch the movies while he tried to think of a way to get Cas back.

* * *

Once the movies were finished Sam sighed in relief. Finally he could kick them all out of his room and go to bed. Leave Dean to deal with his own damn problems.

With that Dean and Cas made their way down the same corridor to their rooms.

"So Cas, enjoy the movies?" Dean asked in a jolly tone, trying to start a conversation with the other man.

"They were acceptable. But I preferred the ones we watched last evening." Castiel replied not looking at Dean. He could answer his questions, it wasn't that much further until his room.

"Yeah, I'm with you there. So do you need more pj's?" Dean asked hoping to get Cas to look at him, though all he got in response was a flush to rise on Castiel's skin as he mumbled his reply.

"Yes please."

"Right." Dean responded not sure what to say or why Cas was so flushed. What did that mean? Was it a reference to what he had done that morning? Was Cas embarrassed cos he had touched his dick or was it something else? Oh damn it.

As such they continued on in silence, and when they got to Dean's room he went in to get some soft pants and a tee, leaving the door open for Cas, not that he entered. As such Dean walked back to the doorway and held them out to the man who seemed to be looking anywhere but into the room. Yep he had definitely screwed this one up big time.

"Thank you Dean." Castiel murmured as he practically snatched the clothes from Dean's hand and ran off to him room, shutting the door with far more force than was necessary.

"Fan-freakin-tastic. How the hell am I gonna repair this?" Dean mumbled to himself before moving to prepare himself for bed. Hopefully something, anything, would come to him that night, not that he held out much hope, but hell he could dream.

Castiel was in his bed trying to find a comfortable spot but knowing in truth he was afraid to sleep. What if the nightmares returned? After all that had happened with Dean he had not thought once more of the images that had come into his sleeping mind. But now, lying alone in the dark with his eyelids begging him to lower them they were all he could see. Images of Dean dead at his feet, of Sam dead at his feet and Dean shouting at him about how it was all his fault and how he wished they had never met. Of Dean recoiling from his touch when he discovered he had feelings for him. How was he supposed to sleep with all this in his mind? How did humans do it?

He tossed and turned for longer than he wished before he finally gave in. The last time he had felt like this, sleeping with Dean helped. And Dean had said that he could come to him anytime when he needed. And right then Castiel needed something, he had worked himself into such a state he saw shadows he knew weren't there in his room. As such he pulled himself into a sitting position, ready to go to Dean. But it took a few more minutes and a lot more reassurance from his mind that his friend would not leave him feeling this way, before he stood and made his way to his door.

He stood outside Dean's room for another minute internally debating what he was about to do. He knew that as a friend Dean would not refuse. But if he found out how Cas was starting to feeling about him, surely he would be disgusted and tell him to leave him alone. So all Castiel had to do was make sure Dean didn't find out. With that resolution in his mind he raised his hand and knocked, though he did it so gently no one sleeping would ever hear it. As such he was rather surprised to hear Dean's gruff voice call out a come in.

* * *

Dean lay on his bed staring up at the ceiling trying to come up with a way to get Cas back to him. Though all he managed to do was berate himself for his own stupidity, but that wasn't productive. He needed an idea. And as such he lay, wide awake trying to come up with one, all the while he could feel his awareness that the man on his mind was in the room next door. He had just decided to give it up for the night and try to get some sleep when he heard a timid knock on his door, he didn't know who it was, but he could hope. Sam would have just barged in and Kevin banged loudly after all. That really did only leave one other option. As such he heard his voice crack slightly as he called

"Come in."

And seeing the man who opened the door and cautiously walked in he felt his pulse race. Cas had come back to him. Maybe he had had a bad dream or something, whatever the reason, Cas was here.

"Hey Cas. Trouble sleeping?" He asked as gently as he could, trying to keep the joy from his voice. He didn't want to scare the man away now he had made the approach.

"Yes." Castiel mumbled in reply, glad it was too dark to make out anything other than the most general of shapes. At least Dean would not be able to read anything in his eyes in this dark.

"Get in then." Dean replied as casually as he could while he raised his covers on the side Cas had slept the previous evening.

And without another word Castiel did just that. Climbed into bed beside Dean and was instantly assaulted by his warmth and closeness, he wanted nothing more than get closer, his body craved it. But that wasn't why he was here. As such he turned his back on the man and lay on his side on the very edge of the bed, closing his eyes and trying to force his body to sleep now he had given it what it wanted.

And Dean still lying on his back let out a silent sigh at Cas chosen sleeping position. Seemed nothing had changed then, but at least Cas knew he could still come to him when he needed it, still come to his bed when his mind got the better of him. And if that was all Dean was gonna get that day, then he would take it. It was more than he thought he would have.

As such they both feel into an uneasy sleep, sharing a bed but as far apart as it was possible to be. But that's the thing with sleep, with the unconscious brain. It does not obey our normal thoughts. As such as the night progressed Dean's body moved to pull Cas closer to him and wrap in his arms. And as soon as they settled into the new sleeping position, of Dean spooning Cas and holding him close, they both feel into a restful, peaceful sleep. There subconscious minds knowing exactly what they needed, even if they wouldn't admit it aloud to each other, at least not yet.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, abovely girl, giawinchester and Guest** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, a nice bit of mush, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Castiel awoke feeling warm and comfortable, it took second or two for his brain to supply the reason why. Dean was wrapped around his body like the best kind of blanket, and that Castiel decided, was not good for his state of mind. As such he tried to pull away from the man holding him, aiming to retreat to his own room for what was left of the night, or morning. He had no idea of the time. But rather than releasing him, Dean's arms seemed to tighten around him as he tried to pull away and he wondered if the other man was conscious of the fact. Though listening to his breathing he realised Dean was still deeply asleep. He had heard him in such at state many times before after all. Just as he was wondering how to get himself out of this awkward predicament, He did not want Dean to wake with him in his arms again, that would be hard to explain, Dean moved closer to his back, mumbling something that Castiel could not understand. Or at least he did not understand most of it, though one word was as clear as day to him, though he had no idea what it meant. Dean had said Cas.

What was going on? Why was Dean mumbling his name in his sleep while holding him closer, and was that… Dean's erection pressed into his back? Was Dean… aroused by this position? By having him in his bed? No surely not. Dean did not like men. No doubt he was thinking of another rather than him, and that was making him sexually aroused. But just as he had convinced himself of that and decided to try once more to remove himself from Dean's arms, the man in question spoke once more in his sleep. And this time Castiel heard every word.

"Umm, Cas. Stay. Like you with me. Like you…"

And these words were accompanied by Dean borrowing his face into Castiel's hair, and… was that a soft kiss on his neck?

Suddenly it hit Castiel that maybe he wasn't the only one discovering new feelings. That Dean maybe felt more than friendship for him too. That would explain his strange behaviour since Castiel had become human. It was Dean's way of seeing if they could have anything together. Was that possible? That Dean liked him in a sexual way? Was it truly a possible explanation for everything? Because now Castiel thought of it, he realised it really was the only one that made sense. Dean would not play with him in a sexual way, and he had never seen him behave as he had done with him with any of his other friends. It really was the only explanation. But… did that mean Dean had always liked him and he just hadn't picked up on it in his angelic state? No Dean had never behaved this way with him when he was an angel. So why now? What was so different between him being human to him being an angel expect the obvious lack of power? Why would Dean wait until now to show his feelings for him? Was it that he had only just realised them himself, now that Castiel was human? No. that couldn't be it. Not the way Dean was acting. Surely his friend would have been freaked out and need time to process the realisation if it had come to him when he became human. Surely Dean wouldn't have just suddenly realised his feelings and decided to do something about it. That was not the way Dean was. So the only real solution was that Dean had always felt this way, but he had never believed before that he could express them to him. Could never express them to the angel he had been. What did it all mean?

But while Castiel had far too many questions going through his mind he knew one thing was clear. He was not going to hide anymore. If there was a chance his feelings for Dean were returned, then he would take it. They could both learn what this new relationship of theirs would grow into together.

With that decision made in his mind he moved carefully, making sure not to wake Dean as he turned so he was on his side and now face to face with the man he had such confusing yet compelling feelings for. He made sure they lay in a position that neither of their erect penises touched. If he was going to take a step along this road with Dean, wherever it may lead, he knew that that step had to small. This was all so new to him after all, but he was sure, if he showed Dean some encouragement then he would help him, guide him down the road, and teach him to understand the emotions coursing through his body. And he trusted that Dean would be happy to go at whatever pace he wished. He knew Dean would never force him to do anything, and now he felt the weight of worry lift from his shoulders, Castiel knew that there was no one he would rather learn from, to experience this side of humanity with, than Dean.

* * *

Dean was having an amazing dream of have Cas in his arms, of surrounding his body with his own and yet there was no sexual connotation to it. It was just him and Cas together, relaxed and happy, mumbling words of feeling to each other. It was awesome. But soon it started to fade with the feeling of someone watching him, and yet, it was a feeling that was familiar, even if he couldn't put his finger on it in his sleep muddled mind. As such he found himself surfacing into wakefulness, blinking to get his surroundings into focus only to find his eyes latch on to only one thing. The blue of Castiel's eyes, staring at him with warmth and happiness.

"Good morning Dean." Castiel said smiling at the green eyed man enjoying watching him coming awake slowly, he had never seen it so close before, and he loved it.

"Yeah you too Cas. How long you been watching me sleep?" Dean asked with a croaked smile, not going to question why Cas was suddenly looking at him, smiling at him again. Whatever had changed Cas' mind Dean wasn't gonna make him think about it. Maybe he had forgotten the dick move Dean had made the previous day. Or maybe he was going with the whole, it's a new day, new things crap theory. Whatever Dean would take it, happily.

"Completely or this morning? Because I could easily answer that with seven years or a few minutes." Castiel responded with a smirk at Dean.

"Let's go with the last one shall we. The first is just creepy." Dean replied with a chuckle at Cas' obvious humour. Who knew the ex-angel could be funny hey?

"As you wish Dean." Castiel responded happily. Settling down so he could just lie there and stare into Dean's eyes which now he knew, he could see held more than they ever had before. They held something Castiel could not put a name to, but it was something that made him feel warm inside. Made him glow under their attention.

"So, sleep well?" Dean asked softly breaking the silence that had settled, but not because it needed to be broken, but just because it seemed the right thing to say. At that point he had forgotten all about deals or reasons for why he was doing what he was, all he thought off was Cas' beautiful smile and the twinkle in his eyes that Dean was sure he had never seen there before. But he was just as sure he wanted to make sure never left them. It was the gorgeous sight in his mind.

"I did, very well." Castiel replied with a soft smile at the man lying opposite him, hoping Dean understood that he was the reason for his restful night. Understood that Castiel had come to the conclusion that he would only have such peaceful sleep with the man whose bed he was sharing.

"Good. I'm glad." Dean responded in the same soft tone. Glad he could give Cas that much. Give him a good night's sleep. He just hoped he managed to give him such a good daytime as well.

With that Dean and Castiel lapsed into just lying there, staring into each other's eyes, with no need for words or any further action at present. They were in a bubble where it was just them. Happy and together, all thoughts of the future or what would happen next dull in their minds. It was in fact, the perfect moment. The perfect morning, and the perfect start to what would be an eventful day.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank** **Perdition Raiser, SkylerLunaLovegood, horsegirl2430 and giawinchester** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean and Castiel were pulled from their bubble by the smell of bacon cooking. It seemed the rest of the inhabitants of the bunker, or Sam at least, were up and about and it was time for them to return to the real word. Therefore with a shared smile they both rolled out of their sides of the bed and moved towards the door, where Dean stopped Cas and put his finger to his lips before gently pulling it open and looking up and down the corridor. He needed to make sure no one saw Cas leave his room first thing in the morning, he had no idea how he would explain that to Sam or Kevin. Finding the coast clear Dean turned back to Cas, meaning to say… something, but one look into those amazing blue eyes and he found the words drying in his throat and his mind going blank, being able to think of nothing but the man in front of him.

* * *

Castiel had stood by the door and watched Dean check no one was around. He understood his caution, he did not want Kevin and Sam to know anything yet either, this was still all too new in his mind. But when Dean turned back to him and just stared Castiel couldn't help but smile at the man. If only he had more guts, more knowledge of what was and what was not acceptable in this situation. Because right then Castiel would have liked nothing more than to kiss Dean. Show him what he had learnt from the pizza man. But he was too shy, he didn't know or understand the protocols here. If there even were any. Were there any rules about finding your human friend attractive now you had become the same species as him?

* * *

Dean knew he needed to speak. I mean anyone could come along and find him and Cas just standing there staring at each other, and there was no way his brother wouldn't be able to recognise the desire in his eyes. He needed to say something, get Cas out of his room and back to his own. But rather than I'll see you later, or something equally inane the words that came from his mouth had the opposite connotation, instead of ending their time together, they invited conversation.

"So I was thinking we could go into town later. The tattoo parlour will be open and free this afternoon."

"I would like that very much Dean. I feel it would be good to have my own things." Castiel responded smiling happily that Dean had arranged the planned outing so soon. Though as that thought left his mind another one entered, and he stated to wonder if he truly would like his own things now he knew Dean liked him too. He liked the idea of wearing Dean's clothes, having at least some part of the man close to him at all times. And he briefly wondered if Dean liked it too. He hoped so.

Dean on the other hand was busy thinking how much he really did like seeing Cas in his clothes, but also imagining how he would look in a decent pair of well fitted jeans, a tight tee that clung to his body… no. Dean needed to pull his mind away from there, and he needed to get Cas away from him before he did something else he would come to regret, like he had done the previous morning.

But again it seemed his body and his mouth had decided to disconnect themselves from his mind. Because even as he tried to think of something to say to end the conversation his hand was raising to Cas' jaw, to run across the stubble that had grown there over the last two days and his mouth said words he hadn't planned on saying.

"Think we need to get you a razor too."

"But, I don't know how to shave, Dean." Castiel responded, tilting his head in that way he did when he was confused about some little human thing. A tilt Dean adored, just as much as he adored the slight crease of Cas' forehead when he did it. Damn did he ever want to run his fingers across the groves until he got to Cas' nose and… stop it Dean.

"Don't worry Cas, I'll teach you." Dean replied swallowing all the thoughts he had had in his head. It was then he realised just how close he and Cas were standing, and how they were both leaning closer. All that separated them was a few scant inches. He would only have to move his head slightly to be able to place a kiss on those rose red lips. But he couldn't do that. He had screwed up enough yesterday morning, he did not need to repeat his mistakes again. No he really needed to get Cas out of his room before he made any more fuck ups. This had to be slow and steady.

With that realisation Dean let his hand drop from Cas' face, however much he wanted nothing more than to cup his jaw and pull his lips to his. And he pulled his body back from the brink of what he had been about to do.

"Well I guess we'd better shower and grab some food then, before we go." He mumbled, trying to sound sure but knowing it came out awkward. Even more so when his mind helpfully conjured up an imagine of him and Cas in the shower together.

"Yes Dean of course. I will see you in the kitchen."Castiel responded before turning and leaving Dean's room and moving off to his own. He wasn't sure what had just happened between him and Dean, but he had liked the feel of his hand on his face. And he decided he would really like it there again. And maybe next time he could work up the courage to close the distance between them, and kiss the green-eyed man the way he really wanted too.

And Dean, closing his door on the retreating man realised Cas had left not a minute too soon. Had he stayed any longer and Dean knew he wouldn't have been able to stop himself from kissing him. With that thought he rested against the door and let out a sigh which was more of a groan. Damn how was he gonna keep his hands off Cas if whenever he looked into his eyes he looked at him like he just had? So much… something there, but no. Slowly, he needed to move forwards with caution. This was a marathon not a sprint, for life not a night. And with these mantras in his head Dean moved from the door and went to get himself ready for the day ahead, already planning which stores he wanted to take Cas too to get his new clothes. Cos this was the guy's first wardrobe, he deserved the best, right? And it had nothing to do with Dean wanting to torture himself with the view of Cas in tight fitting clothes every time they saw each other. Nope, nothing at all.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser and giawinchester** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Sam woke with a plan fully formed in his head. He was gonna entice the two thick idiots, or at least one thick idiot and one deluded ex-angel, into the kitchen with the smell of bacon. After all who could resist the smell of cooking breakfast meats? Certainly not his neanderthal of a brother. And once he had them there, at his mercy, he was not gonna let either of them leave until they had had a decent conversation, even if he had to tie them down to get them to do it. Or though he might just withhold the bacon until they spoke, he knew Dean at least wouldn't last more than 30 seconds in that situation.

With that in mind Sam pulled himself out of bed with a spring in his step. He was going get those idiots talking, and hopefully, seeing the truth before the morning was out. It would be easy. It would work fine.

But when Dean and Castiel came into the kitchen, his plan seemingly working, he saw the way they smiled at each other before sitting down well within each other's personal space. And when they then proceeded to just stare at each other in that way they did Sam realised he had had no need of his plan after all. It seemed the two of them had sorted it out themselves sometime during the night. Sam had only one request at that realisation, and that was that he never learnt what happened between his brother and his former angel in the dark of the night. Some things were most definitely best left unsaid, and very much unimagined. With the realisation that his work here was done, or more to the point not needed, he slipped from the tension filled room and moved to the library, though not before he remembered to take a quick pic of Dean and Cas on his phone. The gooey expression on his brothers face would make the best bribery material, and let's be honest, who knew when he would have need of it? Plus the loved up looks Dean and Cas where throwing at each other were pure gold.

* * *

Dean and Castiel occupied their time between finishing breakfast and before they were going into town doing mundane things. Castiel supposedly helping Sam and Kevin with the angel tablet, though in truth he was sitting there thinking about Dean and how he had enjoyed waking up with him. And Dean, well, he ended up counting the minutes until he could pull Cas out of the bunker.

Finally the time came and it was with lots of smiles and rather a lot of haste that they left Sam and Kevin behind, both of whom were grateful for the chance to actually get some work done without the pair acting out their love story in front of them.

* * *

Dean drove straight to the tattoo place deciding it would be best to get Cas inked up before they spent too much time outside the protection of the bunker. He didn't want any of the damn angels finding him, or demons for that fact. Especially now Crowley was aware that Cas was human. No, get him protected, then take him shopping.

Therefore it was with great curiosity that Castiel walked through the door of the tattoo parlour, he had never been to one after all. He found the designs on the wall most interesting and intricate, the artist here obviously did good work if these photos were anything to go by.

"So what can I do for you guys?" A tattooed man asked coming out of the back room and giving both Castiel and Dean a smile as he sized them up. They weren't his usual type of customers, he doubted either of them had had a tattoo before, but hey, first time for everything.

"Hey, my friend here wants to get a couple of tats." Dean said gesturing Cas over to the guy so he could show the man his designs.

And the artist, Ron, took the pieces of paper Castiel held out to him and looked at the designs. They were unusual enough to cause his eyebrows to raise at them, but they were simple enough for him to do.

"Okay, come through to the back." Ron finally said having studied the designs closer, to make sure he got them perfectly right in his mind.

With that Castiel and Dean both followed the man, and Castiel happily climbed into the chair next to the artists tools, finding the whole process of permanently marking his skin to be very interesting.

"Right, so where do you want these?" Ron asked Castiel, amused by the child like interest in his eyes. He wondered if this guy had any idea how much this was gonna hurt, he didn't look like the kind of guy who had known much pain.

With that sentence Castiel didn't think, he just pulled his, or rather Dean's, tee over his head revealing his chest to the two men with him. Though only one was seriously affected by the sight. Dean couldn't stop himself even if he knew he should. His eyes travelled done the well tone muscles and sculpted shapes of Cas chest and his mouth went dry with the wish to let his fingers follow the path of his eyes. But now really wasn't the time to start imagining that shit. As such he cleared his throat in the hopes to dislodge the lump that had formed there and tried to concentrate on the conversation that was going on between Cas and the tattooist.

"I would like the anti-possession symbol here." Castiel said pointing to the correct design and then to the position on his chest which was the same place as he knew Dean and Sam had theirs.

"Getting matching tats Cas? Really?" Dean asked with a soft smile taking any bite from his words.

"It seems a safe place." Castiel responded with a shrug, though he smiled up at Dean as he said it. He liked the idea of having the tattoo in the same place as Dean had his.

And Ron, who had watched them both, including Dean's perusal of Cas' chest just shook his head. He found it kinda sweet how much these two obviously cared for each other. He just hoped they knew how luckily they were to have found the one. But back to business.

"And where do you want the other design?" Ron asked.

"Here." Castiel replied moving to unbutton his pants, causing all of Dean's good thoughts of thinking about anything other than Cas' body to fly out of the window, as he pulled them down enough to expose his right hip. And looking Dean could see the top of the dark curls of Cas public hair just peeking out at him. Oh holy freakin' hell. How was he supposed to keep his mind from sex when all he could imagine was playing with that hair, and what else was nestled within it.

"You know, having it on the bone is going to hurt." Ron said, deciding it was probably best not to look at the friend at this point.

"Pain does not bother me." Castiel replied simply. It was the most protected part of him that he could think of. He didn't want anyone able to get their hands on that tattoo. It was the only thing he would have that could protect Dean from the angels should they come looking for him. The only way he had of making sure they never found them.

"Right then." Ron responded somewhat surprised by that reply. He had taken this guy for nothing much, but it seemed he had been wrong. With that he turned to prepare all he would need to do the two tattoos and Castiel watched his every move, fascinated and wanting to learn all he could about the process.

Dean on the other hand just stared at Cas, his mind such a jumble of thoughts, images and emotions, but he didn't care. It was Cas, and as he was coming to realise, that was enough of a reason.


	14. Chapter 14

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, giawinchester and Castiel-in-the-phonebox for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean was watching Ron draw the tattoo on Cas' chest, he wanted to reach out and hold the man's hand, but as he didn't seem at all uncomfortable about what was happening. Therefore Dean felt it would probably be a bit weird if he grabbed Cas' hand for no reason. As such he sat there and watched Ron mark the perfect skin of Cas' body, watched the involuntary flexes of his muscles at the pressure of the needle. He was so engrossed with what was going on he almost didn't hear his phone ring. And when he saw the number that flashed up on it, he really wished he hadn't.

"I'd better take this." He mumbled to Cas before quickly making his way from the tattoo parlour. After all anyone calling him with the number 666 was not gonna be someone he wanted Cas to hear him talking to.

"Yes." He barked down the phone, but the reply, rather than coming out of the speaker, came from the demon who suddenly appeared at his side.

"Now, now squirrel. Is that any way to greet someone who saved your moose's life?" Crowley said, putting his own phone in his pocket. He liked being able to catch Dean off guard, it was entertaining. Therefore with a smirk etched onto his face he took a look around his eyebrows raising in curiuosity when he saw they were standing outside a tattoo parlour.

"What the hell ya doin' here Crowley?" Dean growled at him. He had no idea how the king of hell had tracked them, but he would find out. It really would not be good if the enemy had found some way of finding them, and if he could get into the bunker… oh that would be so much worse.

"I felt it was time for a progress report." Crowley answered before turning to the far more interesting idea of why Dean was here. "Are you getting an 'I heart Cas' tattoo or is the less feathered one in there getting an 'I heart Dean' one?" He asked sweetly making Dean narrow his eyes at him even more. Oh yes, it always was fun winding up the eldest Winchester.

"Neither. Cas is getting his anti-possession tattoo." Dean grounded out in reply. He wasn't sure he should tell Crowley that, but surely he would know anyway. Especially if he ever tried to take over Cas' body. Not that Dean was gonna let Crowley anywhere near Cas, but still.

"A waste of time." Crowley dismissed with a wave of his hand.

"Excuse me?" Dean asked in disbelief at the words. What the hell did Crowley mean by that?

"Oh please, do you really think I would send my minions in to take his body? I have better things to do with my time I promise you." Crowley responded with a roll of his eyes. I mean how stupid did Dean think he was?

"How the hell did you find me?" Dean grumbled deciding to let the previous conversation go, he really would prefer to talk to Crowley for as little time as possible. Plus he wanted to get back to Cas inside. Be there for him, watch him get that tattoo on his hip… no. need to concentrate on what Crowley had to say first, fantasise about Cas later.

"Let's just say, I have friends in the NSA." Crowley responded and when Dean seemed to just look at him blankly he realised he was going to have to explain it in nice simple terms for the boy. "I tracked your phone's GPS."

"Yeah well, you can just go and untrack it." Dean replied crossing his arms and glaring at the king of hell. I mean seriously, why the fuck was he tracking his phone? What the hell did he want from him anyway?

"Really Dean?" Crowley asked sighing at the petulant school-boy look Dean had on his face right then. But that didn't matter, he was here for a reason. Might as well get to it. "How are you and Castiel getting along?"

"Fine. You can leave now." Dean responded. He felt wrong talking to Crowley about him and Cas, even if he knew that was part of the deal, didn't make him feel any better about it. What he really wanted was to never see the demon again so he could pretend the deal had been all a lie. At least then he could try to believe that whatever happened between him and Cas was because of their feelings for each other, and had nothing to do with Crowley's manipulations.

"Very well, but I expect you to keep me posted Dean. After all, your brother's life is in the balance." Crowley said as a parting shot, teleporting away to his own business. He would make sure to drop in on Dean the next time he left his secret hideout, and Crowley knew he had one. After all this was the first time since he had put her on it that his demon had been able to get a lock on Dean's phone.

* * *

"Son of a bitch." Dean muttered to the empty air that had been Crowley before releasing his breath in a frustrated sigh. He needed to get his mind away from the demon, and back to the guy who was waiting for him inside. Waiting and half naked. Yep, the image of a bare-chested Cas appearing in his mind certainly made all thoughts of Crowley vanish from it.

* * *

"Who was that?" Castiel asked as Dean returned to his side. He had been distracted without Dean at his side, worried that something could happen to the other man while he wasn't with him.

"Just a… colleague. Wanted some intel." Dean replied after thinking for a few seconds. He didn't want to lie to Cas, and well, technically he hadn't lied with that sentence. Crowley had wanted intel, and he was kinda a colleague right then. "So how we doin' in here?" Dean asked as he settled back into the seat next to Cas and smiled at him over the top of Ron's head.

"Just finished with this one. About to start the next." Ron replied before Castiel could get a word in. not that Castiel minded, because with that sentence Ron moved and Castiel could watch as Dean's eyes Automatically went to his chest and the new tattoo proudly displayed there. He liked the look in Dean's eyes when he saw it. It made him feel warm and tingly.

"Does it look good?" Castiel asked as Ron prepared the equipment for the next tattoo.

"Oh yeah Cas. It looks real good." Dean replied having to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat at the stark contrast of Cas' pale skin and the black ink. Who knew anti-possession tats could be erotic?

"Right, time for the next one." Ron said smiling at the look on Dean's face. He was glad his client's boyfriend obviously approved of his work. Always helped in getting repeat customers.

"Of course." With those words Castiel moved so that his right hip was displayed and easily accessible to the artist. This new position made it so he was lying on his side, staring straight at Dean. So while Castiel may not be able to watch Ron work, he would be able to watch Dean's reaction. Which in Castiel's mind was a far better view anyway. He did so enjoy watching those expressive green eyes.

And Dean, seeing the new position Cas was lying in and the view it gave him of his toned chest, narrow hips and the perfect dark line of hair that led down into Cas' pants, realised he had definitely returned at the right time.

"Awesome." He muttered, though Cas who heard it took it that Dean was pleased his second tattoo was being started. But Dean knew full well it was more a comment on the view he now had in front of him. A view he found more than pleasing, if not a little tantalising. If only he could touch the vision in front of him, but he would have to wait for that. Dean just really hoped he didn't have to wait too long.


	15. Chapter 15

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank Superlove (Guest) and giawinchester** **for the wonderful review. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Once Castiel was all inked up and Dean had cooled down, slightly, from the thoughts Cas' nakedness had put in his mind, they left the tattoo parlour. It was time to get Cas' some clothes and Dean couldn't wait.

As such he pulled him into the first clothes store he found and piled his arms high with jeans, tees and shirts. When it got to the point that Castiel thought there was a definite possibility that he was going to fall over, he already couldn't see round the mass of clothing Dean had given him, Dean dragged the former angel to the dressing rooms. It was time for Cas to try everything on, and Dean wanted to make very sure the clothes fitted right. He therefore settled himself down for the long haul, and anticipated the fun he was going to have at acceptably ogling Cas in public. Dean suddenly had a new appreciation for clothes shopping.

It took an hour but eventually Castiel had found a few pairs of jeans that both he and Dean agreed on. Meaning they were lose enough for Castiel to move in, but fitted enough that Dean got to see his ass whenever he turned round. He had also chosen a selection of tightish tees and plaid shirts. The usual Winchester hunting uniform, which was unsurprising considering they were really they only people he had to model himself on.

Once the casual clothing was taken care of Dean decided to splash out and buy Cas a new suit. I mean sure the guy had the trousers he had worn for the last seven years back at the bunker, but surely after seven years wearing the same thing Cas deserved something new and improved… and better fitting.

That was how Castiel found himself once more loaded down with clothes and Dean almost ended up drooling all over the stores floor at the fashion show he was given. Who knew Cas in a sharp dark fitted suit would be such a fucking sexy sight? Especially as his hair had got all messed up with the continuous taking off and putting on of clothes. Hmm, Dean would have to learn not to look at Cas when they were on the job if he was wearing a suit it seemed, of course he could just leave Sam to finding out all the details and stare at Cas instead. A much better use of his time in Dean's mind.

Once the one suit had been chosen, Dean would have happily filled Cas' wardrobe with them but he claimed to only want one, they made their way towards the last stop. Coats. But as they left the smart area Castiel stopped by a rack of ties, tilting his head as he looked at the designs.

"Hey Cas, you don't need one of those. You have your blue one." Dean said realising he was walking off on his own and turning back to see what had caught Cas' eye.

"I'm thinking that maybe I should have a new one, for the new me." Castiel replied shyly, not sure how Dean would take that comment. He wasn't sure how to explain what he was feeling, but he knew he did not want to wear the tie he had back at the bunker. Not now he was human. That was his angel tie. And he wasn't an angel any more. He wanted, no needed, something new. Something different, something that would remind him and others of what he was now.

Dean looked at Cas' down turned face and thought he understood. Cas was human now, he wanted something that showed that fact to the world.

"Sure thing. Which do you like?" Dean asked him with a smile and a gentle tone. He wanted to make sure Cas got everything he wanted from this trip, no matter what it was.

After a minute of studying the patterns and colours closely Castiel chose a grey stripped tie, holding it up to Dean to get his final seal of approval. And while Dean would have preferred Cas to choose a blue one he nodded in agreement. He could always get him a blue one later, when Cas was more comfortable with his humanity.

Moving on to the area which held the winter jackets Dean's eye was automatically caught by the beige trench coat which looked remarkably like a better fitting version of the one that was currently under his bed, but he knew Cas wouldn't go for one of them. Not if he didn't want to be reminded of who he wasn't anymore, and honestly, that coat was rather emblematic of Castiel the angel. Therefore with a sigh Dean followed Cas to the area which held the woollen coats, ones that would be smart enough to wear while being FBI, and the jackets Cas would need while hunting.

Having finished the clothes shopping, and having brought enough to fill half the boot of the impala, Dean and Castiel made their way to the grocery store where they could pick up wash stuff for Cas and food for everyone else.

They got to the bathroom aisle with a cart already three quarters of the way full and Dean picked Cas up a razor and some shaving foam, he then insisted Cas choose himself some shampoo and shower gel.

"I don't need any Dean. I am quite happy using your brothers." Castiel argued when Dean told him to choose, he had no idea what was different about all the bottles on display. They all seemed to do the same job from what he could see.

"Yeah, no. you need your own stuff Cas." Dean replied adamantly. There was no way he was gonna have his future boyfriend smelling like his brother. That was a mood killer if ever he had heard of one.

So despite his lack of understanding Castiel choose himself some nice apple smelling shampoo and orange flavoured body wash, they reminded him of the flowers, and if Dean thought they also smelt like something a girl would use he wasn't gonna say it. He actually rather liked the idea of Cas smelling of apples and oranges. They suited him, all fresh and innocent.

Finally they were done, Dean managing to slip some serious-strength strain remover into the cart. Buying Cas a new coat had reminded him of the old one, and even if Cas didn't want it back right now, Dean would like it to be there ready for him if he ever did.

So everything they needed to buy had been brought, and they had both had a great time doing it. It was almost strange how they had both enjoyed doing such a mundane human thing which was, to the both of them, something extraordinary. But now it was time to go back to the bunker, get Cas into his new clothes and for Dean to teach him to shave. And the hunter had to say, he was definitely looking forward to doing that. It would give him a great reason to get close to Cas, and maybe see just how tight he could make Cas' new jeans go, completely innocently of course.

* * *

Sam was sitting in the war room when he heard the door bang open, looking up he found his jaw drop open. He had never seen so many bags in his life. What the hell had Cas and Dean done? Brought everything in Lawrence? I mean, seriously, did Cas need that much stuff?

"Got enough things did you Dean?" Sam asked sarcastically to his brother. Considering this was the same guy who barely remembered to replace his own clothes unless they were literally falling off of him. Which thinking about happened far too often in their line of work, still, it did seem a little extreme.

"Hey Cas needed a whole wardrobe." Dean defended. He knew he might have gone a bit over board, but Cas deserved it. He needed to feel human, having a choice of what to wear was one more human thing he needed to learn about.

"It looks like you brought him two." Sam responded with a roll of his eyes and a rueful smile at the obvious spoiling Dean was doing of Cas. Was this his way of wooing the guy? Cos he wasn't sure it would work so well with Cas as it might have done with the women who had been in Dean's life previously.

"Is it too much? You should not have brought it all Dean." Castiel interrupted the brothers with a worried frown on his face. This must have all cost Dean lots of money and he knew the Winchesters did not have much of that. He needed to remember to take things like that into consideration now. Maybe they could return it to the store? He did not need all the things Dean seemed to insist he did.

"Ignore him Cas, Sammy's just being a little bitch." Dean replied glaring at his brother for upsetting Cas. He should know by now Cas didn't get sarcasm half the time.

"Jerk." Sam muttered in reply before turning back to his book and saying nothing more, letting Dean manoeuvre Cas past him and out to his room. Though once he was sure they were gone Sam couldn't help but smirk at his brother's protectiveness. Damn Dean was so mushy some times. Sitting there Sam wondered how else he could bring that side out in his brother. Though it was for no other reason than his own personal amusement. Gave him something other than reading to do during the day. Hmm, maybe he should see if he could find them a case. He obviously needed to get out of this place if his only form of amusement was his brothers blossoming relationship with his former angel best friend. Though speaking of said friend, he doubted Dean was gonna let Cas go hunting just yet. Maybe he could go alone? That would work. With that idea in his head Sam pulled his laptop to him to see what was happening in the world outside the bunker.


	16. Chapter 16

**Hello again. I would like to thank** **giawinchester** **for the lovely review.**

 **So this is the chapter I have been wanting to write for at least a week, hence the quick updates. Also I would like to mention I have no idea how to shave, being a woman we don't shave our faces. So I have done some research, but it is a bit sketchy.**

 **Anyway I hope you like this chapter as much as I do.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean was sitting on his bed waiting for Castiel. The former angel had insisted that if he was to wear his new clothes then he must have a shower first, though Dean was sure it was more cos he loved the shower. Not that Dean blamed him, the water pressure in the bunker was awesome. He just wished he could accompany the man. Soon. Soon he would get his dream of sharing a shower with Cas, he would make sure of it. But right now he needed to control his sexual urges and work out how he was gonna teach Cas to shave. I mean the last person he taught to shave was Sammy, and that pretty much consisted of him covering his brother whole face with shaving foam and running away laughing. Not what he wanted to do with Cas. So thinking about it Dean decided that the best way to teach Cas would be if he did the first one and showed him what to do. Teach him to go with the grain and wash the blade in cold water, things like that. The only problem with this idea he could see was if he got the shakes. But surely he wouldn't do that. I mean he had been shaving for years. He was pretty experienced, he just really didn't want to cut Cas. That really wouldn't go down well, and well, as cute as Cas was with his whiskers, he didn't really fancy kissing a guy with beard. It just seemed to weird in his mind.

But before he could ruminate any further his bedroom door opened to reveal his idea of heaven. Cos there was Cas, wearing his new tight jeans, and tight tee with his blue plaid shirt open over the top. Dean couldn't stop his eyes from running up and down the man's body before he met Cas' eyes with a smile.

"Looking good Cas." He murmured, trying to make it sound jokey but meaning every single word.

"Thank you Dean. Are we going to shave now?" Castiel asked smiling in return, a twinkle in his eyes. He had taken note of the time Dean had taken looking over his new clothes and it had made him feel warm and happy. If he wasn't mistaken there was a faith look of desire in Dean's eyes. He hoped he wasn't mistaken.

"Yeah let's do that." Dean responded with a chuckle at Cas' words. He never thought he would be asked that question at any time in his life time.

With that they both moved to the bathroom and shut and locked the door, Dean did not want to be startled by interruptions while he had a blade anywhere near Cas' face thank you very much.

Once that was done Dean got out the razor and the cream and showed Cas what to do with the latter.

"Right, I'm gonna do it this first time so you can see how it's done, okay?" Dean asked when Cas had half his face covered in white foam.

"Of course Dean." Castiel replied, rather glad about that. He wasn't sure he would be able to concentrate properly considering Dean was standing in front of him so close that their legs were in line with one another, with one of Dean's between his.

With that Dean took a deep breath and started to carefully remove the scruff Cas had accumulated over his couple of days as a human. He didn't speak much, trying too hard to concentrate on what he was doing. But he did manage to remember to explain the basics.

And Castiel supposedly watching in the mirror kept getting distracted by staring at Dean's face so close to his. Full of so much concentration.

Once he had finished rather than telling Cas to rinse of the excess foam Dean found himself doing it for him. Enjoying having a really good excuse to stroke the former angel's now smooth skin. In fact he was pretty sure that he continued washing of Cas' face long after all the foam had gone, not that the other man seemed to complain, but Dean knew when enough was enough. As such he pulled the towel he had brought with them into his hands and padded Cas' face dry with the excuse he wanted to show him how to treat his skin after he had shaved, hoping Cas had no idea he did it purely so he could keep on touching him for a while longer. But even that couldn't last forever.

"There ya go Cas. Nice and smooth." Dean said unable to stop himself from raising his hand and gently running his fingers across the recently shaven skin.

* * *

Castiel had been memorised by Dean's movements, especially when it came to him washing his face and patting it dry. Castiel knew he could have done those things himself, but he enjoyed the feel of Dean's hand on his face so much he allowed the other man to do as he wished. Anything to prolong the connection. It seemed to simultaneously excite him and sooth him. It was a strange mix of emotions that he rather enjoyed feeling. They were all so new, but they worked so well together inside of him. It was pure bliss. But soon it was over, far too soon in Castiel's mind, and when Dean spoke, running his fingers once more across Castiel's skin as he did so, with no barrier of towel of water. It was… ohhh he couldn't describe it.

"Thank you Dean." He replied to the other man's words, though even to him they sounded slightly breathless. It was then he realised how close he and Dean were still, and now there was no blade or other device between them. It was just him and Dean, inches apart. It reminded him of that morning, and what he had promised himself. That if he was ever this close again be would be bold. He would not be a coward and shy away. He would go for what he wanted, what he believed, what he hoped, they both wanted.

"You're wel-" Dean started to reply but his words were interrupted by Castiel's lips colliding with his. There was no finesse in the kiss, nor was it soft and gentle as he had expected his and Cas' first kiss to be. It was forceful and passionate, and friggin' awesome. It took Dean half a second to realise what was happening. But once he got with the program he was kissing Cas back just as fiercely as he was being kissed. They seemed to have jumped a few steps in Dean's seduction of the man, but he really didn't care. Instead he threaded his fingers through Cas hair, clenching them tight so he could pull his head closer to him. Turn it just the right way to get the best from the kiss for both of them.

Castiel was in ecstasy that Dean was kissing him back just as passionately as he kissed him. Just as the babysitter had returned the pizza man's kiss. Therefore, taking his cue from that film he moved his hands to Dean's hips and grabbed the roughly, pulling them so Dean was trapped against the skin behind him while Castiel pressed his body against Dean's. This was so much better than when he had done the same thing with Meg. Because this was Dean, and Dean was the one he wanted. With that thought he remembered the subtle things the human had been doing to him over the last couple of days, and therefore moved his fingers accordingly, sneaking them under Dean's tee. Though he used no gentle finesse in his movements. He did not understand the concept of stroking gently, instead he dug his fingers into Dean's skin, causing the other man to moan in appreciation at the action even if it would no doubt leave a bruise later.

Dean's head was spinning and he was having a hell of a hard time keeping up, which was not normal. It was usually him in the lead and he had thought it would be the same with Cas. But no. Cas had pressed his body against the sink which was digging hard into his back, but that just added to the awesomeness in his mind. And when Cas dug his fingers into his skin Dean couldn't help himself. He was a moaning mess, and he just melted against Cas. All thoughts of controlling this first kiss few out of his mind and he succumbed to following wherever the former angel led. Damn he would follow him anywhere right now, even to screwing on the bathroom floor if that was what Cas wanted. He was completely at his mercy. But what was strangest in Dean's mind about that, was the fact he really didn't care. Hell he fucking loved it. Simple as.

Castiel finally pulled away from Dean realising that as a human he needed to breathe, though he did not step back, did not let go of the hold he had on Dean. Instead he stood there his blue eyes blazing with desire as he breathed heavily and stare unabashed straight at Dean.

"Holy fuck Cas." Dean murmured when he finally had breath to speak. He hands had fallen from Cas hair to his shoulders and he dropped his head back to take a second to collect his wits, what was left of them at any rate. Seriously so not how he had it planned. But damn it was even better.

"Was that okay?" Castiel asked his voice deepened by desire, and when Dean brought his head back to stare at Cas he found him doing his usual head tilt thing. He couldn't help it, he chuckled. Only Cas would ask if it was alright after a kiss like that.

"Cas, that was more than okay, that was friggin awesome." Dean reassured the guy when still not sure his head was back where it should be. No one had ever made his head spin like that before.

"I'm glad you like it." Castiel replied with a shy smile so completely at odds with how he had just kissed Dean. It was completely contradictory, and adorable in Dean's mind.

"Liked it? Cas I loved it, in fact I can't wait to do it again." Dean responded with a cheeky smile, hoping now that they had both got the breath back they could go back to losing it again. If Cas was gonna kiss him like that for the rest of his life then he was sorted.

"Well then-" Castiel replied with a smirk before he moved in to capture Dean's lips once more.

This time Dean was less surprised by what was happening and found he was more able to keep up. But the one time he tried to take charge he lost it again in short order. Seemed Cas had decided he was gonna be in charge in this relationship. Okay then. And while Dean had never thought he would be happy with the idea of someone else being in control, this was Cas. And Cas he trusted completely. He was surprisingly happy to give him the reins, for the time being at least.

They were pleasantly in their own little world which consisted of lots of tongue and even some biting, yes Cas was trying everything and Dean enjoyed every second of it. Of course it couldn't last but still they were both surprised and separated quickly when a banging sounded on the door.

"Hey you guys done in there yet? Some of us need to use the bathroom you know." Came Kevin's voice came through the wood.

"Umm, yeah sure. Be out in a minute." Dean managed to say, though how he put together a sentence when Cas was looking at him as if he wanted to devour him he had no friggin' clue. But he did.

With those words he gently eased Cas off of him, and turned to tidy up before making sure they were both reasonably presentable. No need to have Kevin talk to Sam after all. With a nod from Cas Dean unlocked the door and together they both walked out.

"Finally." Kevin muttered paying no attention to Cas or Dean and instead pushing them out the way as he headed into the bathroom.

"So umm, what now?" Dean asked once the door closed behind the young prophet.

Castiel, rather than reply grabbed Dean's hand and pulled him to the man's bedroom. He very much wanted to continue with the kissing they had been doing, and it wasn't like they could do that in the corridor was it?

And Dean, well he happily followed along, and he was more than happy to be pushed down on his bed once they got to his room, especially when Cas joined him and their lips met once more. Yep, this was definitely a very good plan.


	17. Chapter 17

**Hello my sweeties. I would like to thank** **Perdition Raiser, TrustNoOne182, giawinchester, Castiel-in-the-phonebox and horsegirl2430** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Sam was looking for Dean. He had two reasons to be doing that. The first was he was kinda hungry and when it came to cooking, Dean was way better than him. Plus the fact if he made dinner Dean would declare it rabbit food and refuse to eat it. So much easier to just get Dean to cook. The second reason he was looking for him was because he found an easy run of the mill hunt not far from here that he wanted to go and check out the next day. It was a milk run, looked like vampires but a really small nest, so easily something he could tackle on his own. And hey, if he got there and found out there was more to it he could call his brother and Dean could get there within a couple of hours, or one hour considering the way he drove at times.

He had searched everywhere he could think to search in the bunker, the bathroom, kitchen, dungeon (you never know), sparing room they had set up, and yet he had come up empty in all those places. He had also noticed the lack of Cas around as well, as such he made his way to their bedrooms guessing Dean was teaching Cas some new human lesson. So it was without thought that when he got to his brothers door he didn't knock, just pushed it open. And what he saw was enough to make him want to bleach his eyes forever more.

"What the hell dude?" He screeched at the sight of Cas lying on top his brother and from what he could see they were connected at the lips. Sam was just glad they had all their clothes on. He really didn't even want to think about what that sight would be like. Note to self, in future knock on Dean's door before entering.

"Sam!" Dean yelped in surprise, making Sam feel a little better that he wasn't the only one surprised.

Dean tried to sit up, but with Cas on top of him that really was an impossible feet. Therefore he found himself glaring up at the blue eyed man who seemed annoyed at the interruption. But when Cas didn't move Dean rolled his eyes and spoke.

"Cas? I need to speech to the bitch I have for a brother." He explained moving his hands so he could gently push the former angel off of him and onto the bed by his side.

"Fine. But I do not appreciate the interruption. I was enjoying myself." Castiel grumbled glaring at Sam while allowing himself to be moved. He looked and sounded very like a petulant child which Sam couldn't help but find funny.

"Glad to know my brothers a good kisser, thanks for sharing Cas." Sam responded sarcastically as he leant against the door frame and crossed his arms, trying to keep up the affronted pretence, though in truth he was glad that the two had finally hooked up.

"You are welcome Sam, and he is very good." Castiel replied with a smile, the sarcasm completely going over his head.

"Right, Dean anything you want to add?" Sam smirked at his brother, enjoying the way his face had gone bright red as he and Cas talked. Oh this was gonna be material forever.

"What do you want Sam?" Dean growled at his brother. Well aware he was now bright red and that Sam had seen what he hadn't wanted him too, not yet at least. He had wanted to tell his brother in his own time, but at least Sam didn't seem pissed about it… though he also didn't seem that surprised. What the hell? Surely he hadn't been that obvious, right?

"Well its dinner time, so I just came to ask if you wanted anything with the salad I'm going to make. I'll put loads of healthy greens in it, but make it nutritious as well I was thinking-" Sam responded innocently, hoping Dean would interrupt him soon because he hadn't actually planed any salads for dinner. He wasn't sure what they had in the cupboards.

"You stay the hell outta my kitchen." Dean said coming unintentionally to Sam rescue and falling right into his trap. He brother was so easy to manipulate at times.

"Fine. But I don't want anyone to stave, and it's not like Cas can survive off your lips alone. Well he could, but I don't think cannibalism is an option really, do you?" Sam responded smirking again as the reference to the kissing made Dean change back to that glorious red colour. So easy.

"Fine. We're coming." Dean replied with a roll of his eyes. Did Sammy really think he didn't see right through him? He couldn't be assed to cook so he wanted Dean to do it.

"Dean…" Castiel whined from beside him. He didn't want to stop kissing, he had been learning so much, and having a great deal of fun, and pleasure. He really didn't see why they should stop. Surely someone else could make dinner while he continued his exploration of Dean and human feelings.

"Later Cas. I promise. Later, I'll make it up to you." Dean responded turning instantly at the tone of Cas' voice and giving him a gentle peak on the lips, though he made sure to move back before Cas could take control and turn it into a hell of a lot more. He was quickly learning that Cas didn't do half measures. Which was a friggin' awesome thing in his mind, but maybe not right now.

"I like the sound of that." Castiel replied smiling up at Dean as he had seen the babysitter do in the movie, as well as running his hands across his chest.

"Yeah so do I." Dean responded with a deep growl. If Cas didn't stop touching him soon, later would be now after all.

"And that's my cue to leave. Don't get side-tracked. I can still make that salad." Sam interrupted having decided he really didn't want to watch the Dean and Cas show, but making sure he left the door open as he walked away. Cos that would mean at least one of them would have to get off the bed to close it. Then they could easily make their way to the kitchen and cook dinner. And as for the case, he could brooch that later, when both Dean and Cas cooled down a bit. Maybe after his brother had eaten would be a good time.

* * *

Dean pulled away from Cas with every ounce of energy he had and managed to get into a standing position, though he very nearly changed his mind when he looked back at the bed and found Cas lying on it with a seductive smile on his face and his hair a complete mess from him running his hands through it.

"Come on sexy. You can help me make dinner." Dean said holding his hand out for Cas to help him up.

"Very well. I suppose I do have to eat." Castiel conceded an idea flashing through his mind. He remembered when Dean had shown him how to cook, maybe he could help Dean in a similar way.

"Yeah so do I." Dean muttered before once more dropping a quick kiss on Cas lips before taking his hand and dragging him out of his room. The sooner they cooked and ate, the sooner they could return to their previous occupation. One he had found was the most awesome ever. Who knew kissing was so damn great?

When they got to the kitchen Dean let go of Cas' hand to go to the fridge and see what he could make that was quick and easy. He wanted to get back to kissing Cas ASAP. Therefore his eyes landing on the mince he had brought he decided to go with Spaghetti Bolognese, if nothing else he could spend his meal time showing Cas how to wind the pasta round his fork, and maybe wiping the bits of sauce from his chin, with his tongue. Hmm, maybe he and Cas should eat separately from Sam and Kevin, it could get messy.

But right now he needed to concentrate on cooking the dinner before he got to do any of that fun stuff. Pulling the ingredients from the fridge and cupboards he noticed Cas was just standing in the centre of the room.

"Hey Cas, why don't ya come and chop the onion for me." He suggested as a way to get the former angel involved.

"I believe I would prefer to watch you cook Dean. Learn more before taking on any task." Castiel replied with a smirk Dean couldn't see as he was moving around the room getting a knife and board.

"Okay, if you're sure?" Dean responded turning to Cas just in time to see him remove the smirk and replace it with an innocent look. What was he up to?

"I am very sure Dean." Castiel replied earnestly hoping Dean had no idea what he was thinking.

"Right then." With that Dean turned back to the chopping board and started working on the onion, but it was barely a second later before he felt breath on the back of his neck and hands suddenly gripping his hips under his tee.

"Cas, what ya doin'?" He asked turning his head slightly so he could see the man who was looking over his shoulder.

"Observing Dean. I want to make sure I get it right in the future." Castiel replied, but when Dean turned back to what he was supposed to be doing Castiel dropped gentle kissing down his neck.

"You know Cas, that's less observing and more distracting." Dean muttered in a slightly breathless voice. He couldn't believe this was the same guy who had seemed so shy before. He had no idea what had changed to make Cas this way, but he was so freakin' glad of it.

"Do you want me to stop?" Castiel whispered innocently into his ear making a shiver run up Dean's back.

"No. but if I screw up, you can explain why to Sam." Dean responded turning his head so he could capture Cas' lips in a passionate kiss before turning back to the job in hand.

"Happily." Castiel murmured feeling a rush of exhilaration that he had Dean at his mercy.

As such the meal took a lot longer than Dean had planned to prepare, and seemed to consist of many kissing breaks, as well as Castiel's hands getting bolder and moving from Dean's hips around to his chest, exploring the muscles and textures that if he closed his eyes Castiel could picture. Though what he saw in his mind was from seven years ago, when he had remade this body smooth and complete with no scars. It was no longer so smooth, and if was definitely not without scars. But Castiel didn't care, they just added up to the Dean he knew. The Dean he care for, and Dean he was learning these new human romantic feelings with. He was his Dean, and he was perfect.


	18. Chapter 18

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank** **the iz, Perdition Raiser, Tripple C 200, abovely girl and giawinchester** **for the wonderful review. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update** **.**

 **So here we are, the next chapter, enjoy my dears.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Sam and Kevin were in the library trying to do research, though Kevin was sure his eyes were getting crossed from staring at the damn angel tablet. Luckily they were both saved by Dean's dulcet tone announcing dinner. The only time either of them moved as quickly as they were was at the prospect of a home-cooked meal, or they were being chased by the enemy. And what did it say about their life that the latter was far more regular then the former? But hey, it was what it was. And Dean was a damn good cook when he put his mind to it.

Arriving in the kitchen they found Dean putting down two bowls of spaghetti bolognese with cutlery, and without a word the both moved to sit in front of them and picked up their forks. They were so ready for this. Castiel joined Sam and Kevin at the table as Dean went back for his. Picking up his fork the former angel tried to stab at the pasta to eat it, but found this an unsuccessful way of trying to get at the food. He frowned down at the bowl before switching his eyes to the two men present, but both Kevin and Sam seemed to have found a way of getting a forkful of pasta and they were in the process of moving it to their mouths. As such Castiel turned back to his bowl and proceeded to attempt a stabbing motion once more.

"Not like that Cas." Dean said returning to the table and watching the former angel attempt to kill what was in his bowl. Now here he had two chooses, he could show Cas how to eat pasta by doing it himself, or he could show him in a more… direct way.

With that idea in mind Dean put his own food down, but rather than moving to sit, he moved behind Cas and wrapped his arms around him, one of his hands closing over Cas' on the fork.

"You need to wind it like this." he murmured into Cas' ear, making Castiel completely forget he was trying to eat and far more interested in having Dean wrapped around.

Dean proceeded the show Cas how to work the fork to get a lump of spaghetti on to it and then proceeded to rise it so he could guide it to his mouth. Castiel was perfectly happy to let Dean take control of the movement of his hand and arm, let him do as he wished. Luckily he remembered to open his mouth before the fork full of spaghetti reached it. He doubted it would be a good thing if Dean ended up just shamming the food against his face. Opening his mouth wide Castiel felt the fork of food enter, but when he sensed it retreat he automatically close his mouth once more, keeping the pasta inside and letting the fork leave. Or at least most of the pasta. He could feel a bit hanging down his chin.

"Now you suck Cas." Dean whispered not so quickly in his ear. Dean's mind already going to the idea of Cas sucking something else. Something much less nutritious, but damn would he ever enjoy having those lips wrapped around his cock.

Having watched the spaghetti disappear into Cas mouth in close quarters Dean decided it would probably be for the best if he sat down and ate his own dinner. Cos if he didn't he might just drag Cas back to his room, and the guy needed to eat. So standing straight Dean caught sight of Sam. his brother was sitting opposite Cas with the most perfect bitchface Dean had ever seen displayed while he held his own forkful of food towards his mouth, and seeing that Dean couldn't help himself. He just smirked. Teach Sam to just walk into him room without knocking now didn't it.

Sliding into his seat he also caught sight of Kevin staring at him with a look of horror on his face. But Dean just shrugged. The kid was gonna have to get used to it. He and Cas were gonna be together for life after all, and be doubted Kevin would be leaving them any time soon.

When his brother was sat at the table Sam went to open his mouth, to tell him to stop with the porn at the dinner table, but he thought better of it. If Dean though they had got one up on him he would no doubt be in a better mood later when Sam told him of his plan of taking the case he had found on his own. And he really needed his brother in a good mood for that conversation. So let him and Cas do what they wanted, this time. But next time, next time he would not take this shit. Seeing Kevin frozen with a look of shocked horror on his face next to him he jabbed him with his elbow, making the prophet turn his eyes to him with a look as if to say he was sure the world had just ended.

"Eat." Sam muttered under his breath. He guessed he was gonna have to explain to Kevin that Cas and Dean were now a Thing, though he was surprised he had seen it. But, maybe not. The prophet had been spending all his time trying to find a solution to the angels falling after all. He doubted the kid had had much time to watch Dean and Cas, and well, the only other time he had seen them together Cas had been freaking crazy.

And so the Winchesters and there assorted guests-cum-family proceeded to eat their dinner in almost silence, though not without special looks being shared being Dean and Cas, and the actions that were involved with eating spaghetti turning decidedly pornographic between the two. Especially when Castiel realised that eating the pasta had a very noticeable correlation to some of the actions of the babysitter with the pizza man's erection. As such Sam was pretty sure he was never gonna be able to eat spaghetti again.

* * *

Once the meal was finally over Kevin made an extremely quick retreat. He really didn't want to see any more of Dean and Castiel's relationship, he was firmly in the belief he had seen enough already. They could do what they liked, he would just prefer they didn't do it in front of him.

Sam on the other hand waited until everything was cleared away before clearing his throat. Now was the time for him and Dean to talk.

"Hey Dean, umm, I was doing some research and I found something." He said pulling his brother from Cas' eyes so that he looked at him.

"To do with the angels?" Dean asked turning his attention to his brother. As far as he was aware that was the only important thing they were working on right now. Well that and Cas, but that was more a… personal project.

"No. A case." Sam responded simply making Dean narrow his eyes at him.

"Why you looking for a Case?" Dean growled. What the hell was Sam doing looking for a Case? Cos there was no way his brother would just stubble across it when he was looking for stuff on the angels.

"It's not far from here, a couple of hours. I was thinking I could go work it while you stayed here and… helped Cas." Sam explained quickly neglecting to answer his brother's question, hoping Dean wouldn't notice.

"What's the case?" Dean asked still not happy with this idea, but if Sam had found something simple, like a salt and burn, and felt the need to get out of the bunker, well Dean could understand that… and it would give him more time with Cas.

"It looks like vampires, but only a small nest." Sam replied wincing even as he said the words. He knew without Dean saying a word that his brother wasn't going to go for it. In fact he was doing his thunderous fury look right then, his 'dad' look.

"No way. You ain't going after vamps alone Sammy, no way in hell." Dean stated. It was that simple. The answer was no.

At that point Sam and Dean just stared at each other. Both sure that their course of action was the right one. Sam knew he could accept Dean's words and let still slip out in the morning, but that seemed dishonest and he didn't want to lie to his brother. But he needed to get out of the bunker. Dean on the other hand was not letting Sammy risk his life, not after all he had done to make sure he had one. There was no way in hell, he was letting his brother go after vampires alone.

"Why don't we all go?" Castiel suggested into the silence. He knew the brothers well enough to know that neither would back down. If they all went then that would solve all the problems in his mind.

"No Cas. You're not ready." Dean growled at him with frown. How could Cas suggest going on a hunt when he had been a human for such a short a time? Surely he was still adjusting to it all.

"In what way?" Castiel asked with a tilt of his head. He knew he was not very good with the people side of cases, but surely he could watch and learn from and Sam and Dean. They were the best in the business after all.

"You've been human for what, a few days? You don't even know how to fight." Dean responded simply. He couldn't let an untried man out in the field. That would be reckless, and when that man was Cas? No way in hell.

"Dean I have been a solider of heaven since the creation of man. I have more fighting experience than you can even comprehend." Castiel responded with a definite growl in voice. For Dean to say he did not know how to fight, after all he had done for the man. It was an insult Castiel would not take.

"Yeah, but that was as an angel. You're human now." Dean tried to explain, though knowing it wasn't working. Cas had that look on his face, the one he used to get when he was seriously pissed and Dean was afraid he was about to smite him.

"So?" Castiel demanded. He did not see what Dean was trying to say. He might be human, but he could still fight better than anyone on earth, well excluding his brethren that was.

"So you're vulnerable. You could get hurt." Dean responded defensively. He was not gonna let Cas get hurt. Not now, not ever.

"Dean, if I let a vampire close enough to hurt me, I deserve it. I can make sure they never get close enough to try." Castiel replied taking a deep breath and trying to control his anger. He could understand Dean's worry. He was used to being immortal in most fights, but he had fought enough angels of late to know that was not the case. All he had to think in any fight was that any weapon the enemy held was an angel blade. He would be cautious. He was not stupid.

"Cas, it's different as a human. Your reaction times are gonna be slower, I just think we should train before you go on a case." Dean explained also trying to calm himself down. Of course Cas wouldn't understand what he was saying. He had never been human before. This was all new to the guy.

"Very well Dean. Let us train now. But if I win, we go." Castiel replied simply standing as he gave Dean the challenge, daring him to back down.

"Come on Cas, one fight ain't gonna show anything." Dean responded with a sigh. He was not gonna fight Cas just to prove a point. That was not the way it worked.

"How about the best out of three. " Sam suggested enjoying this Dean and Cas show much more than the one he had put up with at dinner. He kinda liked the idea of watching the former angel beat the crap out of his brother.

"I am happy with that proposal, Dean?" Castiel responded not removing his eyes from the man that only hours ago he had been kissing. Just because he had started to feel a romantic connection to him, did not mean he would let Dean put him on the side lines. He could fight, he could help. He wanted to be a hunter just like them, and he would not let Dean stand in his way. He was not letting Dean go off into dangerous situations without being there at his side, doing all he could to keep him safe. That had always been his role ever since he had pulled him from heaven, and he would not be changing it now, even if he would be doing it as a human.

"Fine. But if I win, we all stay here." Dean responded with a sigh knowing there was no way of this. But at least he could make sure his brother didn't go off on his own this way. He could kept all he those he loved here until they were all ready.

"I'm good with that." Sam replied. If he was betting man he would put everything he had on Cas wiping the floor with his brother. And even though he wasn't, he couldn't wait to see it happen.

"Right. No time like the present I guess." Dean replied with a sigh. He did not want to hurt Cas, but he had to learn that as a human he didn't have the strength, speed or immortality he had had as angel. And if this was the only way to show him, then so be it.

With that the two Winchesters and the former angel stood and made their way to the training area. It was time to see who was right, Dean or Castiel.


	19. Chapter 19

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Tribbs, abovely girl, giawinchester, Perdition Raiser and horsegirl2430** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **Also I want to apologise for any grammatical or spelling errors, I'm dyslexic so have to depend on word to pick them up.**

 **Anyway time for the fight, who do we think is going to win? He he he. Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean stood there stretching and limbering up, getting ready to fight Cas. Not that he wanted to hurt him. Maybe he could go easy on the guy and show him how much he needed to learn to fight as a human.

Castiel on the other hand just stood there with his arms crossed watching Dean with a frown. What was he doing? Was this some sort of human thing he needed to learn? There didn't seem much reasoning behind it in his mind. From what he could see Dean was just waving his arms around.

And Sam, who had come to be judge just sat back with a smile on his face. He was really gonna enjoy this. In fact, probably a bit too much if he was honest, but hey, Dean was his brother and they lived and worked together, he irritated him on occasion, quite a few occasions.

"Right then, you sure you want to do this Cas?" Dean asked finishing his warm up and getting into a fighting stance.

"Yes Dean, very sure." Castiel replied with a chuckle at the other man's confidence. Did Dean really think he could beat him? It was rather adorable if he did.

"Okay then, let's do this." Dean nodded at Sam.

"Kick his ass Cas." Sam said waving his hand in a fight gesture before relaxing back though luckily he didn't take his eyes off of the match, because if he had he would have missed it.

Dean went in to punch Cas, though not at full strength he really didn't want to hurt the guy just teach him a lesson, but before his fist could even get close to connecting he found the ground disappearing from beneath his feet and he was slamming back down on his back having the breath knocked out of him. What the freakin' hell?

Castiel stood over Dean and looked down at him when he didn't move just lay there. He hoped he hadn't caused any damage to the man, maybe he should be a bit gentler with him in the next round.

"Dean, are you okay?" He asked getting worried.

"Just peachy." Dean responded through gritted teeth sarcasm dripping from every word, and in the background he could hear Sam chuckling, the little bitch. He would get him back for that, somehow. But first, he needed to beat Cas' ass. That was not fun.

"Do you want to fight again? I am happy to declare this the end and we will all go on the hunt tomorrow." Castiel replied unaware of Dean's thoughts and just worried he had harm him. After all it was not like he could heal him anymore. And he would prefer to have an unharmed Dean later when he and Dean had some time together alone again.

"You ain't getting out of this that easy Cas. It was best out of three, so best out of three it will be. I let you have that one." Dean responded rolling over so he could pull himself onto his hands and knees before sitting back and taking a deep breath. Damn he hated having the air knocked from his lungs.

"You let me swipe your legs from under you? Why would you do that? It seems rather counterproductive if you are trying to win." Castiel replied with a frown. He could not see Dean's logic for his strategy, surely the aim of this was to win the fights correct? Why would Dean let him win?

"Yeah well, I'm generous like that." responded Dean pulling himself to standing and turning round to face Cas again. Right he could do this. He was ready, and this time he wouldn't be so confident, he'd fought angels and won, he could beat Cas even if he was one of heavens best warriors. He could win this. Cas was human now, and had human weaknesses just like him. And being as he had been human all his life, surely he knew what those weaknesses were better than Cas did, right?

With that thought Dean threw back his shoulders and got once more into a fighting stance.

"Round two off you go." Sam sing-songed from the side lines. He had never seen his brother taken out quite so quickly before. But then that was probably because he had never seen Dean underestimate his opponent before, though he doubted he would be doing that again.

The fight lasted longer this time, though only because Dean spent most of it keeping well out of the way of Cas' feet. Instead they circled each other, both moving in and back in feints trying to draw the other to them. But then Dean saw his opening, Cas was slightly turned away from him, as such he put his shoulder down aiming to ram into the guy and knocking him over, thus gaining the win. What he didn't count on was Cas still having amazing reflexes and speed drawn from centuries of training.

Castiel on the other hand, while knowing that as a human he did not have the power he had had as an angel, he did still know the laws of physics, and the art of using minimal force to counter an opponent.

Dean therefore instead of ramming Cas found himself being spun around, causing him to completely lose his balance and once more he ended up on his ass on the floor, though at least this time he could still breath.

"Best three out of five." He growled up at the former angel. He was not gonna let Cas beat him. No way. He was the god damn hunter here, not Cas. He was the one who had faced loads of evil shit, though thinking about Cas probably had as well, what with being like centuries old, but still. He should be able to beat him, right?

"No matter how many times we do this Dean, the outcome will be the same. I will win. But do not feel bad, I have been fighting for much longer than you." Castiel replied holding out his hand to Dean hoping he would accept it as a peace offering. Hmm, maybe he should have let Dean win one, just to ease the man's pride, he did seem to have a lot of it after all.

"Fine. You verses me and Sam. We win we stay here, you win we go on the hunt." Dean growled out. He was not having Cas beat him. Not now he was human.

"Hey!" Sam exclaimed. He had enjoyed watching Dean get his ass kicked, he really didn't want to have his kicked as well.

"If that is what it will take to convince you I can look after myself in a fight then so be it." Castiel replied with a sigh, both he and Dean ignoring Sam's input.

"Come on Sam." Dean growled at his brother with a glare making him stand and join them. This was all his fault after all.

"You know this isn't gonna work Dean, why not just admit defeat?" Sam muttered as he moved so he was opposite Dean and Cas was in-between them, not that he thought Dean would ever do such a thing. He and his brother fought together so regularly there was no need for them to confer, they both knew what patterns and movements they would use against the ex-angel.

"Let's begin." Castiel said amiably standing in-between the Winchester brothers, keeping an eye on both of them, watching for their moves so he could take them out.

With two against one the fight lasted longer than it had before. Dean and Sam originally going in one at a time to wear Cas down before they both went in together. And yet, even with their combined skill and strategy they barely got a touch on the ex-angel before he manged to put them both down, though he was sweating from the exertion of facing off two such good fighters. And that was something new, he had never got tired out before. He was going to have to remember that for future engagements, to make sure he conserved his energy the best he could.

"Well it looks like we're going hunting tomorrow." Sam said with a smirk on his lips even if he was lying on his back on the floor.

"Looks like." Dean grumbled from the floor not far from him.

"Right, well then. I think I'm going to bed. Night." Sam replied jumping up and deciding to make himself scarce. Let Cas ease Dean's wounded pride and deal with the grumpiness. He wanted none of it. Plus he needed to pack.

"Dean, are you hurt?" Castiel asked joining Dean on the floor when the other man didn't seem inclined to get up.

"Na, Cas. I fine, just wounded pride." Dean replied with a sigh. He should have known really, I mean Cas had beaten the crap out of him before, it was just… he didn't want Cas to get hurt. And not because of his deal with Crowley or cos of Sam's life, but because he was Cas and he cared for him. He was family.

"Well if it's any consolation I did find that harder than I would have done." Castiel responded with a quirk of a smile as he looked into Dean's beautiful green eyes.

"Cas, you were an angel. Not really a consolation." Dean replied with a croaked smile of his own as he shoulder bumped Cas.

"I guess not." Castiel replied with a sad smile, remembering the power he used to have. Had he still been what he was before during in the fight they had just had, then neither Sam nor Dean would have had a chance. But he wasn't, he was human now. He had accepted that, and he was rather enjoying all the new discoveries he was making, especially with Dean. But he also realised that feeling more for Dean also made him more concerned for his welfare. He hated the idea of Dean getting hurt on a case, especially considering now there was nothing he could do to help him. Hmm, he was going to have to learn all he could about human medical treatment. Maybe Sam could show him some sites on the computer to help him learn what he would need to know to keep the Winchesters safe.

"Sorry, you know for thinking you couldn't fight just cos you were human now." Dean said into the silence. He needed to say it. He had been thinking Cas was this fragile being cos he had just become human and didn't know the simplest of stuff, but he wasn't. He was still Cas, the badass angel that had burst into the barn seven years ago, even if he no longer had the power he had had then.

"That is okay Dean. I understand. Humans are a lot more fragile than angels." Castiel responded with a smile. He was going to have to learn to fight as a human. This contest with Dean had shown him that. Not that he couldn't fight, but there were new challenges he was going to face. He was going to have to train if he was to keep in shape and be able to do all that was needed when he was out with Dean and Sam.

"Yeah they are, and I need you to remember that. Don't go getting yourself killed cos you think your immortal okay?" Dean replied glaring at the ex-angel hoping he was getting through to him but having a horrible feeling that he probably wasn't. Cas would no doubt have to learn the hard way he was not the angel he used to be.

"I will do my best, as long as you try not to throw yourself into fire to save the rest of us. You remember you have someone to come home to and so will I." Castiel responded simply, linking his and Dean's hands together. He had watched Dean fight, and he had seen how he would throw himself between Sam and danger without a second thought. He needed Dean to think about himself now. Because quite simply he had come to the conclusion that he needed Dean in this new life of his.

"Is that what we are Cas? People to come home to?" Dean asked looking down at their joined hands. How had they got here so fast? To this conversation? They had only kissed for the first time a few hours ago. Not that Dean was complaining, I mean he had already decided he was gonna spend the rest of his life with Cas, he just hadn't expected him to have made the same decision.

"Well I prefer the idea of coming home with, but yes. I think I would like that Dean, being with you in that way." Castiel replied after a beat where he coincided it. He knew he had no experience of relationships, not romantic kinds anyway. But he also knew Dean had always meant more to him than anyone else on earth or in heaven. So was it really a stretch to think about spending his human life with the man?

"So you're saying you want us to have a relationship?" Dean asked wanted to make sure he and Cas were on the same page. That they had decided that they were together, exclusively for each other for the rest of their existence, however long that would be.

"If that is what you want Dean." Castiel replied suddenly realising that maybe Dean didn't want that. Maybe he was just having some fun with him as he had seen him do with so many women in the past, though he had never seen him do it with a man before.

"Yeah, it is." Dean responded laying his cards on the table. He had made a deal, not with Crowley though that was what had sparked this, no, with himself. That in doing what he needed to save Sam's life, he would give everything to the man beside him. He was Cas' and Cas' alone. No one would ever take him from him for as long as the ex-angel wanted him at his side.

"Good." Castiel replied moving so that they could seal there agreement with a kiss, though this one was softer and gentler than the others they had shared. This was not a kiss of passion, but one of blossoming love, of sealing something more than just sex. This was a kiss sealing two lives together.

Pulling back from the kiss Castiel smirked up into the green eyes which were blinking open. They may have just confirmed where they stood with respect to each other, but that didn't stop him wanting more of what they were discovering earlier, in fact it made him want it more. He wanted to discover everything he could with the man next to him.

"Now come on, I think it's time for bed and you did promise to make it up to me later, I do believe later have arrived." He said in a sultry voice standing in one smooth motion and pulling Dean up by their still connected hands.

"You bet. Let's go." Dean responded with a smirk of his own. Oh he could think of so many things to do to make it up to Cas that night. And as they walked to their rooms he had great fun planning them all out in the most intricate of detail.


	20. Chapter 20

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank** **giawinchester for the lovely review.**

 **So here is the next chapter, and one of the reasons I changed this to an M rating. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

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Dean was lying on his bed wearing a pair of pants and a tee, waiting for Cas to join him. They had decided it would probably be best if they both got into the night clothes, it wasn't like they would be going anywhere. They would both be spending the night in Dean's bed. Dean was trying to decide what he and Cas were going to do that night. How far Cas would be willing to go. Though Dean had already ruled out all the way. He wasn't ready to sex with Cas yet, I mean it wasn't like he had actually done anything like this before with a guy. Sure he may have stumbled across the odd gay porno, but he had never actually acted it out. He only had the very basic idea of how to go about that. Add to the fact that he wanted to take things slow with Cas, I mean this was his first ever sexual experience, he knew he was best to think on the conservative side.

His mind was pulled away from his plans by his door being pushed gently open, causing him to move so he was resting on his elbows.

"Hello Dean." Castiel said as he came through the door, liking the image of Dean waiting for him on his bed. Just where he wanted him, though he really was wearing far too many clothes. Or though it was the same amount as Castiel himself was wearing.

"Hey Cas." Dean replied deciding not to move. To let Cas come to him. From that afternoon he had come to the conclusion that Cas like to be in control, and he could give him that, for now at least.

Castiel decided that that was enough words for now. As such he made his way across the room and without any embarrassment and he climbed onto the bed so he was straddling Dean and pressed down on his shoulders so than the man under him had no choice but to lie down. Castiel sat there looking at Dean lying beneath him with a smile, but something wasn't quite right in his mind. As such without a word he moved his hands so that they entered Dean's tee and moved upwards, rumbling it against his body.

And Dean lying there got the message. He moved upwards just enough so that Cas could help him remove his top, giving Cas full access and view of his chest. At the sight Castiel smiled even more. It was similar to what he remembered rebuilding. And knowing that body under him had come about from his efforts was a decided turn on he was finding. But it was also different, it had changed in the last seven years, be it from age or damage. As such Castiel found himself mapping all the changes, the muscle difference and the scars, taking great delight and time in discovering Dean's body's as it was now.

Dean lay there under Cas' wandering hands and tried to keep his breathing even, though he failed miserably. This was not what he had planned, but as he was starting to learn, Cas didn't work to his plans. He was not the one in charge of this relationship. And for now, Dean was happy to let it be that way. Let Cas do as he wished.

Castiel took his time moved his hands, starting at Dean's abdomen and moving up to his chest taking great glee in pinching his nipples and causing the other man to suck in his breath at the pressure. But eventually he found his hands on Dean's shoulders and it was then he saw a mark he recognised. It was the burn of his hand when he had pulled Dean from hell. Bending over the man below him he moved just out of kissing reach. and he looked deep into Dean's eyes as he moved one of his hand so that it covered that mark. That burn he had created in the body below him. And when his hand covered it he closed it tight, causing a searing feeling to go through Dean's body so much so his chest raised from the bed towards him. Dean had no idea what was happening, it wasn't uncomfortable, but it was different from anything he had ever known. Castiel on the other hand knew exactly what was happening. He had rebuilt this body beneath him, and he was touching the point of connection. The grace he had used to recreate Dean was responding to the residuals left inside of him. The bits that allowed him to still hear angel radio. He was reaffirming that this body below him was his, to do with as he pleased. Reaffirming his dominance over Dean. With that he closed the distance and pressed his open lips to Dean's demanding entrance and passion.

And Dean below him while he had no idea what was going on, he knew was it felt damn good. And when Cas' lips finally touched his he was happy to open them and let the man above him do as he pleased. He was his and that was all he knew right then. He was Cas'.

Castiel moved from Dean's lips to kiss down his neck, deciding that his hands exploring Dean's body was not enough in his mind. He wanted his lips and teeth to explore it too. He moved slowly, leisurely causing the man beneath him to groan in pleasure and desire for more, but they would not be moving faster than Castiel decided they would. He had shown Dean in the training room who was the strongest, did he really think it would be any different in bed?

Moving down Dean's body Castiel catalogued what caused the most sounds of enjoyment for Dean for later reference. He seemed to particularly like when Castiel bit his nipples. Something Castiel had to say he enjoyed doing. And as he moved down Dean's body he could feel the hardness in his pants. He didn't have any idea of how to relieve that, well no, that wasn't true. Academically he knew many ways, but he wasn't sure how to put them into practise. But then he had an idea. He had masturbated before, maybe he could give Dean pleasure the same way.

Therefore when he reached Dean's abdomen and had kissed every scar he had obtained since he had recreated the body beneath him Castiel slipped off of Dean, making the man in question look at him, as if he was about to do the same to Castiel's body. But both Dean could move, Castiel just gave him a smirk as he slipped his hand beneath his pants and under his boxers, grabbing hold of Dean's erection and causing Dean to groan his name in pleasure and for his eyes to roll closed. But still it wasn't enough in Castiel's mind. As such he moved his other hand so he could pull Deans pants and boxers down so his erection was there for him to see. And with it on display Castiel started to play.

* * *

Dean had had a plan, he was going to kiss Cas and then get him on his back so he could give him pleasure. That idea had gone out of the window when Cas had entered his room and taken charge. Dean had been tempted to take control back, but he was just too curious to see what Cas would do to do it. And then Cas had touched the hand shaped burn on his arm. The hand shaped burn he had forgotten had been created by the man above him. The feel he got from that connection was more powerful than any he had ever experienced, but it wasn't a controlling force, more one that showed him the power of the one who had touched him. A power he didn't realise Castiel wheeled, but apparently when it came to him he did. With that he knew he was lost, any plans he had had were a fool's errand. What happened between him and Cas was completely in the hands of the other man. As such decided to lay back and enjoy whatever pleasure Cas decided to give him. He would take whatever he gave and he would be happy with that.

Castiel took Dean's erection in one hand and moved it gently up and down, running his finger across the top enjoying the quickening of Dean's breath at his touch. But he soon decided that while teasing Dean was fun, he wanted more from the other man, he wanted abject surrender.

Castiel griped Dean's erection tighter in his hand and started to work it so fast and so hard that Dean could not do anything but move his body in the way Castiel desired him to. Moaning Cas name as he pushed up into the closed fist giving him hard honest pleasure.

It didn't take long before Dean found himself coming all over Cas' hand and his own body. Opening his eyes he saw Cas raise his come covered hand to his mouth and sucking off his body fluid, and my god was that a turn on. If Dean had just come, he would be as hard as hell just from that sight.

"I thought I was the one who was supposed to be making it up to you." Dean finally managed to mutter. He had no idea that being with Cas would be like this. If he had, he would have made his move long ago.

"There is still time Dean." Castiel replied with smirk pulling off his own tee and lying down next to the man who had just had his world exploded with a challenge on his lips. A challenge which said quite clearly, if you have the energy to pleasure me, you are welcome to try. And Dean was never one to back down from a challenge.

Therefore he pulled himself from his own post organismic stupor and lay on his side while he ran his hand up Cas' body. Taking the time to map out the new tattoo on his chest before lowering his hand to the waist band of Cas' pants.

"I really think these are in the way." He murmured not taking his eyes from Cas' blues. Making the other man smirk and move his hips upwards removing his pants and boxers while not breaking eye contract with Dean.

"Better?" Castiel asked with a smirk, lying beside Dean with his pants now half way down his thighs and yet with no embarrassment.

"Definitely." Dean replied still staring into Cas' eyes as his hand moved down to Cas' cock. Stroking it and squeezing it as he would if it was his own. But even while Dean worked his erection he never took his eyes from Cas, he wanted to see what he liked, and he wanted to see him come. Wanted to see his eyes glaze over as he took him to paradise. It didn't take long. Dean had learnt from Cas' treatment of him what he liked. And watching Dean took great pride in seeing Cas' eyes turn from blue to almost back before they rolled back and he called out his name. He called out Dean in such a desperate yet authoritative way, Dean knew he would never tire from him his name in that tone. Nothing would ever stop him from wanting to make Cas come.

Castiel came back to earth to find Dean doing exactly what he had done, licking his come from his hand.

"So, that was fun." Dean said when he saw Cas was back with him.

"Very much so." Castiel replied with a smile. He had enjoyed their adventures this evening very much, and he couldn't wait to do them again.

"I'm thinking we should do that again, sometime." Dean suggested echoing Castiel's thoughts making him smile even more as he turned so they were both lying on their sides facing each other.

"Agreed, but not now. We have a case to work on tomorrow." Castiel responded sensibly, even if he wanted to spend the night playing with Dean.

"Okay." Dean replied knowing that Cas was right. It was time to sleep. They had had their fun, for now.

With that they both decided to dispense with their pants. They might as well sleep together in just their boxers. After all it was the way they planned to spend the rest of their nights together, well almost, but close enough, for now.


	21. Chapter 21

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Raheem, the iz, Perdition Raiser, horsegirl2430 and giawinchester** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

' _Tell me that you'll open your eyes,_

 _Tell me that you'll open your eyes,_

 _Tell me that you'll open your eyes,_

 _Tell me that you'll open your eyes.'_

 _Open Your Eyes – Snow Patrol_

* * *

Dean made sure his phone was turned off before he climbed into baby the morning they set off on the hunt. He didn't want Crowley tracking him, and especially didn't want him to just turn up. I mean that would not go down well with Sam or Cas. Of course it would go down even less well if they ever found out why Crowley popped in on him. He didn't put it past the damn demon to tell them just to get under Dean's skin, to make it harder for him to fulfil his deal with the guy. But that wasn't gonna happen cos Dean was gonna make sure the king of hell couldn't find them. It was that simple.

Pushing all thoughts of Crowley from his mind he turned the car onto the road which would lead them to the town Sam thought was being pestered by vamps. He really did not want to be on this hunt. He would much prefer to be back in the bunker, back in bed with Cas, experimenting, seeing how far they were both ready to go… no. he really needed to stop thinking like that. To stop thinking about the feel of the other guys naked skin sliding against his own. Oh man, he really needed to stop now. Getting a hard on while driving his car and his brother was sitting in the seat next to him was not what he would call a good plan. Just concentrate on the road, the road and the music. With that Dean leaned over and turned the stereo up full blast, earning a bitchface from Sam, though Castiel sat in the back just relaxed into his seat and closed his eyes.

This was the way he remembered it. Driving down the road with the brothers sitting up front. Going to face the latest evil of the week. Yes, this was what humanity and family was in his mind. Saving people, hunting things. This was the life. And now he had Dean as well, what more could he ask for? Well except his grace to be returned, but he could live without that as long as he had Dean and he could still save people. He could still do good as a human, he could still protect humanity, he would just be doing it differently.

* * *

Dean pulled into the motel and jumped out of the car before Sam even registered where they were, he was too busy on his phone doing yet more research on the case.

"I'll get the rooms, you to get the bags." Dean shouted moving quickly to the front desk. He needed to be away from where he could see Cas every time he looked in his rear-view mirror. In all truth he looked in it a lot on the drive here, much more than was needed, but was it his thought that the former angel looked so damn hot sitting there with his eyes closed and a smile on his face. Completely relaxed and at one with the world. It was so damn sexy. If his brother hadn't been with them Dean knew he would have had to pull over at least twice just so he could kiss those god damn adorable lips. Who knew Cas could be so irresistible while doing nothing?

"Hey. Two rooms, one double, one single." He said to the woman at the counter, not really paying much attention to her, his eyes getting caught by the sight of Cas climbing out of the car and stretching.

"Hmm." The woman said having taken note of the fact that the party booking into the motel consisted of only men. Though who was with who she had no idea, they were probably all at it together. Damn homosexuals.

"Here. 21's the double." She said slamming the keys down in front of Dean making him raise his eyebrows. Really? What the hell was her problem?

"Thanks." He smiled taking the keys. He was tempted to say something about how he planned to make loads of noise with Cas later on just to see her face, but he thought better of it. He didn't want to get them thrown out, even if this place was no doubt a shit hole. These types of motel always were. But he was Dean, and he couldn't just leave it.

"I'm sure my boyfriend and I'll have a great time together, the showers are big enough for two right? If not, we'll just have to get real close." He said with a smirk as he made his way out of the door, not giving the woman a chance to reply. Though he did catch the way her face turned beet red at his words. Served her right, she should be more polite.

"Hey Sammy, catch." He yelled getting back to the car and throwing the single room's key at his brother before taking his bag from Cas with a smile of thanks.

With that the three of them made their way to the two rooms, Sam was briefly confused when Dean stooped by one which didn't have the same number as his own. But then he realised, of course Dean had got him and Cas a separate room, and thank god really. Cos there was no way Sam would share with those two, and the car really wasn't big enough for him to sleep in. Not if he had the choice of a bed anyway.

"Just tell me mine isn't the room next to yours." Sam said with a smirk as he continued walking.

"Why?" Dean asked, thinking maybe he should have asked for just that. It would be easier, right?

"Because I know how loud you can be Dean, and I really would prefer not to hear that." Sam responded over his shoulder glad to find his door a few rooms away.

"Bitch." Dean shouted at him as he watched Sam unlock his room.

"Jerk." Sam responded as he quickly walked through the door and closed it on his brother and the former angel.

"He's right you know." Castiel muttered moving so he was standing behind Dean and could wrap his arms around his waist and rest his chin on his shoulder, completely oblivious to the idea of not displaying affection in public. He wanted everyone to know Dean was his.

"Don't you start." Dean grumbled. He was not loud, he made his partners scream, that was all. And he decided not to say anything about the hug. I mean sure it wasn't really his thing, being all lovey-dovey, but if Cas wanted to be like that, then that was how they would be. It had nothing to do with the fact he actually liked it at all.

"Why? I like your moaning Dean. It tells me I am doing it right." Castiel murmured quietly into his ear before biting the lobe gently extracting just the sound he loved to hear from Dean's lips.

"Just like that. Moaning and calling my name." Castiel whispered, his voice having gone even deeper with desire for the man in his arms.

Dean could think of no response for that apart from grabbing Cas' hand and pulling him to their room so he could finally do what he had been wanting to do all the way here. Namely kiss him senseless.

* * *

Sam got into his room and pulled out his laptop to check on any recent developments. That and it gave Dean and Cas time to do whatever it was they were gonna do. He had thought that once they got together it would reduce the eye-sex, but if the looks his brother was throwing the former angel in the car was anything to go by, it had just increased it. He hadn't believed that that was actually possible, but it seems he was wrong. Oh well, give them time to get it out of their system then he would go over there and they could start investigating. Hmm, he should probably change into his suit in preparation. With that he closed down his laptop and went to get ready, taking his time. Anything so he didn't walk in on Dean and Cas again. Once was enough for him.

* * *

Dean pulled Cas into their room but as soon as the door was shut he found himself being pushed against it and Cas' gorgeous lips on his. He wasn't about to complain. He loved this side of his angel, this strong, forceful side. Even if he had never expected it.

Castiel moved his lips from Dean's and along his jaw as his fingers made their way under Dean's tee, causing one of those glorious moans to fall from Dean's lips once more as the other man leant his head back. This new position gave Castiel the perfect access to Dean's neck, where he took great pleasure in kissing and suckling, pulling more noises from the man he had pressed against the door. This was all so new to him. He acted on pure instinct when he was with Dean, but it seemed he liked it. Which was good, because Castiel certainly did.

They had no idea how long they stood like that. With Dean pressed against the door and Castiel kissing him and roaming his hands across his body under his clothing. But they were rudely pulled from their pleasure bubble by a knock on the door and Sam' voice interrupting them.

"Hey you two ready yet? We need to get going."

"Not quite." Dean managed to reply, pushing Cas away from him as much as he didn't want to, and stepping away from the door so he could let his brother in. At least Sammy's voice had put a damper on the erection Cas had given him.

"Dean, you're not even changed." Sam said with exasperation as he made his way into the room and found both Dean and Cas wearing what they had been before. He sensibly decided to ignore how messed up Cas' hair was, or the slightly glazed look in his brother's eyes. He did not want to know.

"Fine, we're doing it." Dean mumbled moving to his bag and pulling out his suit and turning to make sure Cas was doing the same. Of course when he turned to Cas he saw he was slightly ahead of him and now had his tee off and was starting to open his pants. And Dean just stopped and stared and fantasied, I mean who couldn't when that gorgeous chest was on display, not to mention what Cas would be revealing next as he slid his pats down, and then his boxers…

"Guys come on, I'm still in the room." Sam snapped looking up from the table he had settled at to see his brother staring at Cas like he wanted to eat him up.

"You could always leave." Dean suggested really not wanting to tear his eyes from Cas. God he had a gorgeous body.

"Or Cas could get changed in the bathroom and you could stop drooling over him." Sam suggested irritably. Surely he had given them enough time to get this out of there system before he had come round. I mean seriously, there were other things in life than sex. Though it was Dean he was talking about, he wasn't sure his brother had ever really understood that concept.

"I don't drool." Dean snapped at him pulling his eyes from Cas so he could glare at his brother.

"Really? Cos that's what it looked like from here. Now come on, we need to get going." Sam replied crossing his arms and giving Dean his best bitchface.

"You could always go on your own." Dean suggested, thinking that that seemed like a great idea. Then he and Cas could spend some time together doing…

"That was what I suggested at the beginning, but you refused to let me. Now you're here, you're working." Sam replied interrupting Dean's fantasy and pulling him back to what was actually going on.

"Fine. Cas why don't you go get changed in the bathroom and save poor Sammy's sensibilities." Dean finally conceded, his brother might be right about him not being able to concentrate while Cas was getting changed. Not that he was gonna tell him that though.

"Of course Dean, you could always join me if you wish." Castiel replied seriously thinking that Sam had a problem with seeing naked people. It was an issue with some humans he was aware, not that he felt it himself. He had no problems with his or anyone else naked bodies.

"No. behave, the pair of you." Sam responded with a growl pointing at both Dean and Cas. He wasn't sure whether Cas was being serious or not, but either way it looked like he would be spending a lot of time trying to keep the two of them apart while they worked. This was not going to be the relaxing hunt he had hoped it would be. And there was a sentence for you, it had got to the point where he thought a vampire hunt would be relaxing. Yeah, he definitely needed to get out and talk to other people.


	22. Chapter 22

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank giawinchester, Perdition Raiser and Raheem for the wonderful reviews.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it. It turned out a lot longer than I thought it would be. Oh well. Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Castiel came out of the bathroom and the sight took Dean's breath away. Okay, yeah sure he had been there when he had brought Cas the suit, but still, damn, he looked fine. It was then that Dean noticed something that was in his mind, quintessentially Cas.

"You know Cas, one of these days we're gonna have to teach you to not have a croaked tie." He said walking over to the former angel and standing close so he could adjust it so it sat right.

"But if I did that Dean, what excuse would I have to get you close enough to do this." Castiel replied leaning forwards and kissing Dean gently on the lips. He liked seeing him in his suit, even if he did prefer Dean in his jeans and tight tees, or nothing at all.

Suddenly loud coughing came from the door causing Castiel to pull away from Dean and turn to Sam with a frown of worry.

"Are you okay Sam?" He asked his voice full of concern.

"Yeah, just think we should get going. Now." Sam replied with exasperation. He couldn't take his eyes off these two for a second without them smooching each other.

"Alright Sammy, keep your hair on." Dean responded rolling his eyes as he pulled away from Cas. His brother was right, they were here to work, not play, mores the pity.

* * *

Sam took Dean and Castiel to the last place the victims, all women in their mid-twenties, had last been seen. It was a bar in town and while Sam questioned the bartender, Castiel listened to his words intently. He was determined to become a good hunter, and he wanted to make sure he knew exactly what he needed to ask to find out the information needed.

Dean on the other hand found himself tuning out his brothers voice and instead staring at Cas. Which he knew he shouldn't be doing. They were on a freakin' case. But still… the guy looked so friggin' hot in his suit. Forcing his eyes from Cas he swept them around the room to see if anyone looked shifty. But all he saw was the woman sat at the back, eyeing up Cas just as he had been doing. Oh hell no. She was not getting his piece of ass. Hmm, maybe he shouldn't have got him such a fitted jacket or pants. But that didn't matter. What did was the predatory look in the evil bitch's eyes. He didn't want Cas deciding he wanted to experiment with her. Didn't want him thinking about the idea of trying out a woman. Nope, Cas was his. Therefore completely ignoring his brothers questions as well as the look of first confusion and then exasperation, Dean moved so he was standing next to Cas, very close next to Cas, and gently placed his hand in the small of his back. A clear signal to all looking that he was unavailable. He just hoped the bitch got the message and stayed well away.

* * *

Castiel had been startled by Dean's touch but turning to see who it was he gave him a gentle small before going back to trying to listen to what Sam was saying. Of course having Dean this close to him was distracting, but he didn't want to ask him to remove his hand. He liked it too much, and he could still get the general idea of Sam's interrogation, even if he didn't hear every single word because he was enjoying the warmth that was spreading through him from Dean's touch.

Dean was just relaxing, he had got his point across and so far no one had tried to punch him, when he suddenly released someone was coming up to him. He tensed, ready for a fight, you never know who was in these kinds of places, but they were usually very intolerant of anything they saw as different. But instead of a gruff hand spinning him round, or insult being thrown at him he found a woman's voice whispering into his ear as she put her arm around his chest.

"I could entertain the both of you, you know. Here's my number, call me." She said slipping a piece of paper into his pocket before walking away again.

Dean couldn't believe that had just happened. Was the bitch insane? Like he would ever share Cas. Whatever, at least she was gone now and wasn't praying on Cas. That was all that mattered in his mind.

* * *

Castiel had seen the woman come up to Dean out of the corner of his eye and he wondered if she knew anything about the missing women. He was just about to open his mouth to ask when he saw her wrap her arm around Dean. He had never felt such a feeling as he did then. It was like someone had shot a red hot poker through his body leaving him breathless and yet he was angry as well. Irrationally so. And when he saw her put her hand in his pocket it was all he could do to stop himself from turning on her. Telling her to stay away from his Dean. To go and find her own, because this. One. Was. His. But luckily she left before he could do anything. Instead he turned so he could see Dean's face out of the corner of his eye. He was glad to see no response on it to the woman, but he was also worried too. Dean did not seem disgusted by her behaviour, and he knew Dean had been with many women like that before. And she was attractive. Was Dean missing sex being with him? Did Dean wish he was a woman? Or at least more advanced in his sexual knowledge? Was Dean rethinking the idea of being with him? Oh lord, he hoped not. Now he had discovered these feelings with Dean, he didn't want to let them, or the man, go.

With these worries in his mind the rest of Sam's interrogation of the bartender was completely lost on Castiel. He was too busy wondering if he was enough for Dean, and what he could do to make sure he kept his man.

* * *

Once they returned to the motel Sam gave Dean and Cas a look of disgust before mumbling something about going to do research in his room. He was so done with them. They hadn't helped at all, not that he had expected Cas to, but Dean had just stood there being all protective over Cas. How did that help them find the nest? It didn't. His brother really needed to get his head out of his ass, or out of Cas' ass, and back into the game. This was what they did, not making fucking puppy-dog eyes at ex-angels and making sure the world knew said ex-angel was off limits. I mean seriously? Was this how Dean was going to be from now on? Because if so Sam took all he said about how he wanted the two of them together back. He much preferred it when they suffered in silence rather than the protective boyfriend routine thank you very much.

* * *

Dean and Castiel returned to their room. It wasn't until the door was closed behind them that Dean noticed something wasn't right with Cas. He had no idea what was wrong, but maybe Cas hadn't appreciated his territorial behaviour earlier when they had been on the case? Maybe he thought it was unprofessional? Only one way to find out Dean guessed.

"What's up Cas?"

"I saw that woman approach you." Castiel replied turning to Dean with a frown on his face, trying to find the right way to say what he was thinking. He had no idea how to describe how he was feeling after all.

"Yeah, what of it?" Dean asked confused, she hadn't meant anything to him.

"Do you want to have sex with her?" Castiel asked taking a deep breath and deciding to go with the simplest way of determining Dean's true feelings. Which was to ask him.

"What? No, or course not." Dean replied completely shocked that Cas had even considered the idea, they were together, Cas was the only one he wanted.

"Why not Dean? She is very attractive." Castiel asked wondering why on earth these words were coming out of his mouth. It was almost like he was trying to push Dean into going to sleep with the woman, when in truth that was not at all what Castiel wanted Dean to do.

"She ain't my type Cas." Dean replied with a shake of his head at the other man as he moved closer to him. He had just realised why Cas was acting the way he was. He was jealous, but he really had no reason to be. Dean just had to make sure he knew that.

"What do you mean?" Castiel asked tilting his head in confusion. From what he had seen of her, she was very much Dean's type.

"She ain't you. You're the only one I want to be with in whatever way you want me to be." Dean replied pulling Castiel towards him by the lapels of his jacket so he was now within kissing range.

"Is that so?" Castiel smirked wrapping his arms around Dean in return. The feeling he had had earlier was completely gone now, all he felt inside was the warmth he got from being with Dean. That was a feeling he liked very much, and could never have enough of in his mind.

"Yeah Cas, it is. But hey, if you wanna go and have sex with her…" Dean replied pushing his hands up Cas' chest and over his shoulders so they could wrap themselves into his soft hair.

"Why would I want that Dean?" Castiel asked with the raise of an eyebrow pushing his hands under Dean's jacket so that only his shirt was between Castiel's hands and Dean's skin.

"You've never been with a woman? I don't know…" Dean murmured in response. He really wasn't paying much attention to the conversation in all honesty. All he wanted to do was kiss those gorgeous lips.

"I don't want anyone else. I have all I wish for right here, in my arms." Castiel murmured back, his tone low with desire. Dean loved that Cas' voice could get deeper, and that it did often around him.

"Good, cos so do I." Dean responded bending his head and kissing Cas' neck rather than those succulent lips. Deciding instead to work his way up to their pleasure.

"Good. Though I do feel you are wearing too many pieces of clothing." Castiel replied moving his head back giving Dean greater access.

"It's like you read my mind Cas." Dean whispered into the former angel's ear before kissing his way along his jaw and finally his lips met Castiel's.

With that touch Dean and Castiel proceeded to strip the clothing from each other's bodies while trying hard to not separate there kissing lips and tangling tongues. It took quite a bit of coordination and patience, but finally they were both standing there naked. It was at that point that Castiel pulled back so he could run his eyes up and down Dean's body, all his body. He spent quite a few seconds staring at his erection, admiring how it raised up out of Dean's public hair.

"Cas." Dean whined when the other man did nothing but look at him, and when he tried to reach for him he found Cas was just out of his reach.

At the sound of Dean's voice Castiel smirked at the other man before gently pushing him backwards onto the bed.

"I want to hear you moan Dean, I want to hear you moaning my name." Castiel said in a deeper than usual voice as he moved towards the naked man sprawled in front of him. Moved so he was slowly making his way up Dean's body, slipping himself between his legs as he trailed his hands gently up the inside of them.

And Dean lying there at the mercy of the other man found he could only do as Castiel wished, and found himself moaning his name, begging him to come closer, to let Dean touch him, to let him feel his skin and body on top of his.

Castiel took his time running his hands up Dean's body, skirting his erection as he went. But finally Castiel was lying above Dean, their bodies still not touching anywhere expect their hands. Castiel's being on Dean's arm, one of them over his mark, and Dean's hand resting on the only part of Cas he could reach, his waist.

Staring into Dean's eyes Castiel gently lowered his body, purposely making sure that their erections touched before any other part, and thus getting to enjoy Dean throwing his head back and a groan of pleasure escaping his lips. Lips which Castiel soon caught with his own once there was no longer any air between his body and Dean's.

What followed was an almost frenzied mesh of lips, teeth and tongues, hands and bodies. Both men were trying to map all they could, give as much pleasure to their partner as was possible. To create the friction they both desired. But once the initial desperate passion moved into a deeper one they slowed, biting turning into suckling, bruising kisses turning gentle and loving. Frenzied touching turning into their bodies being pressed together tightly.

Coming down from the senseless state the initial stage of this encounter had left him, Dean found his hands in Cas' hair as the other man kissed him deeply, and he found his legs wrapped around Cas' calves and knees, holding the other man between his legs. It wasn't a position Dean had ever consider having Cas in, but he rather liked it. Especially the feel of Cas on top of him, pressing against him, the other guys cock hard against his own. Oh yeah, he was more than happy right where he was.

Castiel felt his body moving of its own volition, searching for something he couldn't quite define. But he knew that while he enjoyed having Dean's erection against his own, it wasn't enough. He needed something… more.

"Dean, I need…" Castiel groaned as he pressed harder into the man below him, still trying to seek the release he wasn't sure how to find.

"I got ya Cas, don't worry." Dean murmured moving slightly so he could get one of his hands out of Cas' hair and in-between their bodies where he was able to take hold of both their erections in his hand. Where he could push them together as he moved his hand up and down, driving them both towards pleasurable oblivion.

Castiel moved so he was resting on his elbows to give Dean better access. But he didn't stop kissing the other man, and as Dean sped up Castiel's kisses became more and more demanding, more and more bruising, and in Dean's mind, more and more divine.

They came at almost the same time. They both felt the organism tightening inside and as such Castiel stopped kissing Dean and moved his lips far enough away that he could moan out Dean's name as the pleasure ripped through him, Dean calling "Cas" a second later as his back arched off of the bed and into the other mans as his cock pulsed in orgasm.

Once done Dean removed his hand and Castiel collapsed down on top off him. Dean knew they should move, that the stickiness between their bodies would soon start to feel real nasty, but rather than saying any of this he wrapped his arms around the former angel lying on top of him, and held him close as they both slowly returned to the real world. And while sure the stickiness wasn't great, having Cas in his arms, having Cas on top of him, more than made up for it in Dean's mind. This right here, this was what he wanted, for as long as he could get it.


	23. Chapter 23

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank giawinchester, Awesome Skillz (Guest) and Perdition Raiser** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update. You are all awesome.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Castiel finally rolled off of Dean moving so he was lying next to the other man and could stare at his beautiful body.

"Liking the view Cas?" Dean asked when he noticed the ex-angels perusal.

"Very much so." Castiel replied with a smirk moving his eyes up to Dean's face so he could stare into his favourite colour of green.

"Good, though I really think we need to clean ourselves up." Dean responded with a smirk of his own. Now Cas was no longer on top of him he could feel the stickiness drying on his belly. And he didn't partially like it much.

"Hmm yes. A shower would be nice." Castiel replied stretching out at the thought of hot water pounding down upon his skin.

"You and your showers." Dean chuckled though he had to confess, he did love a good shower as well. He also loved Cas all wet when he came out… stop. Now was not the time to get turned on, again.

"You could always join me Dean. Did you not suggest that before?" Castiel asked innocently. He liked the idea of sharing a shower with Dean. Of washing his body clean. Yes that sounded like a very fun way to pass the time in his mind.

"I did. But I don't think the one in there will be big enough for the both of us. We might have to leave that for when we get back home." Dean replied with a slight sigh of regret. He knew motel showers, they were tiny and had very little hot water. Definitely not enough to do all the things he wanted to do to Cas under it, that was for sure.

"Back home." Castiel responded with a small smile at the words. For so long home had been a place he didn't belong any more. It had been heaven. But now home was the bunker, home was with Dean. Home was where he now belonged. Pulling his mind from these sentimental thoughts that he doubted Dean would appreciate him sharing he turned his smile into a smirk as he leaned over to kiss the other man.

"I hope we finish this case soon then." He muttered before closing his lips over Dean's in a gentle yet suggestive kiss.

"Minx. Let me get cleaned up then the bathrooms all yours okay?" Dean replied once Cas let him up for air. With his words he moved quickly off the bed before Cas tried to trap him there once more, not that he would have a problem if he did. But they really needed to get clean.

"Of course." Castiel responded moving so he could watch Dean walk away completely naked.

And Dean well aware of his audience couldn't help but swing his hips and wiggle his butt for Cas. And when he got to the bathroom door he turned and gave him and quick wink before moving into the room, getting everything ready to clean himself up.

* * *

Castiel had only moved to turn on the TV while Dean had been busy. As such when he came back into the room it was to find the former angel butt naked while watching some DIY show.

"Why you watching this Cas?" He asked confused at the other man's choice in TV viewing. Surely he didn't like this right? Though it was Cas, he could do, you never know.

"Because I did not think porn was appropriate." Castiel replied turning to Dean with a smile. Though he frowned slightly when he saw Dean had put on some new boxers. He preferred his Dean naked, but maybe the other man had been cold.

"You know, there are other things besides porn and this on TV." Dean responded blinking at Cas' response. I mean seriously, there were like a gazillion channels to go at.

"I could not find any." Castiel answered with a shrug, though he had found it interesting to learn how to put a shelving unit together. You never know when that could come in handy he was sure. Plus it was a very human thing to learn to do and he was human now.

"Go have your shower, and give me the controls." Dean replied reaching for them. Hmm, he was gonna have to remember to introduce Cas to some decent TV, like Dr Sexy. Even if that show did on occasion still remind him of Gabriel.

"As you wish Dean."

With that Castiel got up, completely unconcerned about his naked state and made his way to the bathroom. Leaving Dean behind him shaking his head as he pulled out a pair of soft pants and tee he could wear to bed.

* * *

It didn't take long before Castiel was back, water dripping down his body and a towel casually slung around his waist. But despite the casual look, he was not happy.

"The water has gone cold." He growled glaring at Dean as if it was his fault even if he knew he had nothing to do with it.

"Welcome to the world of crappy motels. Get used to it, it's part of a hunters life." Dean responded with a chuckle for how pissed Cas was about not getting to spend quality time in the shower. It was these little quirks, these humanisms, that he was coming to love about the guy. They reminded Dean that he really was no longer an angel.

"Well I don't like it." Castiel grumbled still not happy, though he knew he would have to accept it if he was going to be a hunter like Sam and Dean. And he was going to be one.

"No one likes it Cas." Dean replied in a conciliatory tone as he stood and made his way to the wet man, running his fingers across his body, tracing the drips of water which were still falling down from Cas' hair onto his shoulders and chest.

"Humph." Castiel replied, though he found his mood changing rather swiftly. In fact he was quickly forgetting all about the lack of hot water, or showers, or anything that didn't involve the feel of Dean's hands against his skin. Hands which moved to undo his towel and making it fall to the floor so he was standing there in front of Dean completely naked.

Dean stood in front of the naked man fully clothed, but still… Cas seemed to exude some sort of power, some confidence, that even though he was the one wearing no clothes Dean still had the feeling that he was the one in charge. He had never coincided that idea. That Cas would be the one in control between them. He had just assumed that it would be him. He was the one who had been human for longer, and Cas always seemed so innocent, so naïve. He always seemed to be the one who followed him. Dean had assumed that that would translate to the bedroom. He had been seriously wrong.

But he liked it. He liked it a lot. Though whether he would like where it would eventually lead Dean had no idea. But they weren't there yet. They weren't at the having sex stage yet. But they could do other things.

With that thought Dean dropped to his knees before Cas and licked his tongue up the underside of Cas' now erect cock. The former angel may well be the dominate one in this relationship, but that didn't mean Dean couldn't show him a thing or two. Even if he had never done them before, he had had them done to him and he knew what he liked. He was sure Cas would feel the same way. With that Dean took Cas into his mouth and proceeded to show him yet another fun thing two men can do together. Yet another way of bringing your partner to orgasm. And even when Castiel wrapped his hands in Dean's hair and pushed his cock deep into his throat Dean didn't struggle or move away. If Cas wanted it deep, then he would get it deep.

When Cas orgasmed into his mouth Dean found he strangely liked the taste. It was salty, but also slightly sweet. It wasn't something he had ever thought he would enjoy, but he now knew he did, he would be doing that again, and again.

* * *

Castiel had been confused when Dean had fallen to his knees, but when he had taken his erection into his mouth he understood what he was doing. It was a new and amazing feeling, having his erection in such a wet and warm environment. He loved it. At first he stood there and let Dean do as he wished, but then he felt the need to move. The need to push in and out of those gorgeous lips that were locked around him. He grabbed Dean's head to hold him steady, to make sure he didn't move as Castiel did. As he found the joy of moving inside of someone for the first time. And even if it was just Dean's mouth, it still was glorious. It made him think about moving inside of a different part of Dean. Made him wonder how that would feel. Made him realise that having sex with Dean was definitely something he would like to do, and soon.

Once he had orgasmed Castiel pulled his penis from Dean's mouth and just stood there, eyes locked with the green of the man on his knees before him. A man who was once again wearing far too many clothes. Hmm, he was going to have to teach Dean that clothing was not a good thing. With that thought Castiel proceeded to undress Dean and move him towards the bed. It only seemed fair that he returned the pleasure Dean had just given him after all.

And Dean lying back with his hands locked in Cas' hair as he wrapped his cock in his tongue and mouth found that all he had thought he knew about a good blow job was a lie. Because the one Cas proceeded to give him was the best he had ever had.


	24. Chapter 24

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank giawinchester and Raheem for the lovely review.**

 **So here is another chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean woke the next morning completely naked and wrapped in the arms of his former angel. Cas was still asleep and it gave Dean some much needed time to take stock of all that had happened over the last few days. He and Cas were now together. He cared for the guy, he really did. It may have been his deal with Crowley that had forced him and Cas together, but it wouldn't be that deal that kept him at Cas' side. Nor would it be his wish not to hurt the other guy. No it would be his feelings. The feelings he knew could become something deep and meaningful with someone who knew him completely. Something he had never had before in his life. He would have thought that that idea would have scared the shit out of him, but right then, with Cas wrapped around him, all he felt was happiness and peace. It was crazy. But now wasn't the time for thoughts like that. No now was time for breakfast. With that in mind he pulled himself out of Cas' arms and made his way to the bathroom to have a quick shower.

It was while the water trickled down on him that he remembered his dream. The dream he had of him and Cas having sex. Now it wasn't the first time he had had that dream, but the difference was that this time it wasn't him pounding into Cas' ass, it was the other way round. And standing there in the shower he remembered the pleasure he had felt at being fucked in his imagination. And he realised how much he would like to try it for real.

Shaking all thoughts of sex with Cas from his mind he turned back to what he was supposed to be doing, he needed to get clean before they ran out of water. He then needed to get breakfast for his boyfriend and his brother.

* * *

When Dean came out of the bathroom it was to find Cas was still fast asleep, looking friggin' adorable curled up under the covers. He decided to leave him a note telling where he had gone so he wouldn't worry if he woke and found him missing. With that done Dean left the room as quietly as he could with a genuinely happy smile on his face. In fact he was paying so much attention to being quiet as he shut the door he didn't at first notice the man leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets.

"Hello squirrel."

"What are you doing here Crowley?" Dean growled at the king of hell as he pulled him away from the room in which Cas slept. He did not want the former angel to see him with the demon. In fact Crowley being here was really not a good thing at all.

"Well I came for a progress report but the smile said it all." Crowley replied with a smirk. He had seen Dean's face as he exited the room and he knew only one person could put that look on his face this early in the morning.

"Then you can go." Dean glared. He was getting fed up with Crowley popping up for reports. He still had loads of time for god's sake. What was the demons problem?

"I could, but while I'm here… how are doing on finding a way to get the feathered ones back where they belong?" Crowley asked deciding he might as well get some intel on what the Winchesters were up to. It was only prudent after all.

"Why do you care?" Dean asked completely confused by this turn in conversation. He hadn't really thought much about the angels being on earth, he had been spending his time with Cas. That was more Sam and Kevin's area.

"I'm the king of hell. I would prefer not to have my enemy on earth." Crowley replied with a roll of his eyes. Was Dean completely oblivious to all that was happening? Of course he was. His mind was all Cas this and Cas that. Hmm, seemed he had found the downside to his deal. But no doubt the moose and prophet boy were on it, surely he could get Dean to find out how they were doing.

"Were working on it. Any sign of Abaddon?" Dean asked deciding to revere the tables. Yeah sure Sam had told him how he had barbecued her, but he had also said he had seen black smoke leave the meat suit. So she was no doubt out there somewhere, and they would no doubt have to deal with her at some point. Oh joy, that really did sound like fun. Hmm, maybe her and Crowley would just kill each other, that sounded like the best plan in his mind.

"The moose did a pretty good job on her with the holy fire, I have her meat suit so she won't be going back into that. But I'm sure, soon enough, she will find a way to return." Crowley responded with a shrug as if he wasn't concerned, even if it was one of his worries right now. Something that maybe the Winchesters and the less-feathered one could help with.

"Then you'd best find a way to kill her then hadn't you." Dean replied smugly crossing his arms. Let Crowley deal with that shit thank you very much.

"There is a way, but…" Crowley said drifting off and looing to the side hoping to reel Dean in. Hoping to get his help to find what they needed.

"But what Crowley?" Dean asked with sigh. There was always something with him. He always had some friggin' angle.

"There was once an army of knights of hell. But the archangels killed them all with the first blade." Crowley replied simply wondering how Dean would respond to the revelation. Wondering what Dean actually knew about, well anything really.

"The what?" Dean asked completely confused. What the hell was the first blade?

"The first blade. The blade that committed the first murder." Crowley explained as if he was talking to a child. Dean could be so slow sometimes, it was a surprise he could put up with him.

"You talking Cain and Abel?" Dean asked dredging what he remembered of the bible to his mind. He wasn't one for all that religious shit after all, even if he did know angels and god were real. He kinda still left that to Cas and Sam.

"Yes squirrel, well done." Crowley replied in his most patronising tone. How could someone be in a relationship with an angel, or former angel, and not know the basics of the bible? I mean seriously? How did Castiel put up with his ignorance?

"So you got it?" Dean asked, though he doubted that very much. If Crowley had it he wouldn't be raising it with him. No, he probably wanted them to go search for it or something. Well he could just go screw himself if he wanted that. He had long ago done being Crowley's lackey.

"No. but maybe your new boy toy could give us some idea about where to find it. Maybe he heard something." Crowley suggested. See if Castiel could get the boys on his side in this.

"I'll ask." Dean replied in a voice which said he would do so when hell freezed over.

"Good. You wouldn't want me to die after all." Crowley replied pulling out the ace he had up his sleeve. Never call him one not to plan ahead, and when dealing with the Winchesters, planning was always required, even if you happen to be high on human blood at the time.

"Oh yeah? And whys that?" Dean asked in disbelief, the death of Crowley would be cause for celebration in his mind. So why the hell would he want to keep him around?

"I may have put a clause in our deal that states if I die, so does your moose." Crowley responded smugly.

"Crowley." Dean growled at him. He couldn't believe he had done that. Damn the pretentious little shit.

"Speaking of the moose, here he comes, I think I'll leave you boys to it. Until next time squirrel, have fun." With that Crowley disappeared leaving Dean to confront his rather pissed off brother. Well that was just great. And the morning had starting so freakin' well.


	25. Chapter 25

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, and giawinchester** **for the reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Sam had woken early and gone over the information they had gathered the previous day, or at least he had gathered. But now his stomach was starting to growl, he needed breakfast and coffee, he might as well pick up something for Dean and Cas as well. With that in mind he grabbed his coat and made his way out of his room. He mind was dwelling on what they needed to do that day, so much so he didn't at first notice his brother in the parking lot. But as soon as he did he went on alert. Because he not only recognised Dean, he also recognised the demon he was talking to. The demon he had presumed was dead. What the hell was Crowley doing alive and well, and engaging his brother in what seemed, from this distance at least, a friendly freaking conversation? Just what the hell was going on here? What had he missed? Cos this cosy behaviour could only have happened when he was in the hospital. What had Dean done this time?

"What the hell Dean?" Sam snapped when he got close enough to his brother so that he didn't alert anyone else who was around.

"Hey Sammy." Dean responded plastering a fake smile on his face while he quickly tried to come up with a reason he was talking to Crowley. Hell he probably also needed a reason as to why the demon was alive.

"What were you and Crowley talking about? And for that matter, what the hell is Crowley doing alive?" Sam asked crossing his arms and glaring at his brother.

"We may have made a deal." Dean replied deciding to stick to a sort of truth.

"A deal?! You made a deal with the king of fucking hell?" Sam asked complete flabbergasted by Dean's words. Why the hell would Dean make a deal with any demon? Especially that one? He was a slimy sack of shit.

"Well yeah." Dean winced in response. Even hearing the words made him feel dirty. And thinking about what he had done made him feel even worse.

"What sort of deal Dean?" Sam asked in an even tone. He knew if he lost his temper then he would get nothing from his brother. And he needed to know exactly what Dean had done, and why.

"I released him in return for intel. He was just giving me an update on the Abaddon situation." Dean replied throwing his shoulders back and glaring at his brother hoping to make him believe him.

"Abaddon's dead Dean." Sam responded narrowing his eyes. His brother was lying, he would put money on it. But he didn't know what exactly he was lying about.

"Not so much it seems. I mean you yourself said you saw her smoke out." Dean replied trying to find a reason for what he was saying. Something Sam would accept and leave well enough alone.

"Fine. But why make a deal with Crowley? We have a dungeon we could have kept him in, got intel from him that way." Sam responded logically. There was something he was missing here, and he would discover it.

"Oh come on, you really think he would talk? Plus I thought it would be good to have the king of hell owe us one, have him on our side." Dean replied going on the defensive.

"You know working with Crowley only ever works for him. We always get screwed." Sam argued running his hand throw his hair in exasperation at his brothers words. Just what the hell was Dean thinking? Was he thinking at all?

"I didn't have a lot of choices did I? Its nots like heaven are our biggest supporters right now." Dean snapped back. He was so done with this interrogation. He had saved his brother's life, why couldn't he just accept what he had to say and move on? Why couldn't he just let it go?

"God Dean. I don't know how you can be so stupid." Sam replied with a shake of his head. He just couldn't believe Dean had done this. It made no sense.

"Yeah well, you weren't exactly all there at the time and I had to do something with him. I wasn't just gonna leave him for his minions to release without getting something in return was I?" Dean argued thinking fast for a reason why he had made a deal, a reason that didn't involve him telling Sam how close he had come to dying.

"Fine Dean, fine. I'm going to get breakfast, why don't you go back to Cas." Sam sighed in response. He couldn't have this conversation right now. They already had enough to deal with, but he knew this would come back and bite them in the ass at a later date. At least he now knew that it was there he guessed. From the looks of it Dean hadn't been planning on telling him. Bloody typical.

"Sure." with that Dean turned to walk back to his room and back to Cas, but after a couple of steps he turned back to his brother. "Make sure you get Cas pancakes with syrup, He has a sweet tooth, and coffee. Lots of coffee."

* * *

Sam walked off from his brother reeling in disbelief at what he had done. He had released the king of hell. He had made a deal with Crowley for intel. Who did that? Dean had had him at his mercy, why would he just let him go for intel? It was then Sam stopped walking as it suddenly hit him.

Dean wouldn't do that. No matter what he said, his brother would not release Crowley unless he had damn good reason to. And he had said he had made a deal with him. Dean had made a demon deal with Crowley. Oh no fucking way. Please god, don't let his brother have done what he was starting to think he had. But… it made a sick kind of sense he realised as all the pieces slotted into place in his mind. Dean would never have actually acted on his feelings for Cas unless… unless he had a deadline, dead being the operative word. Just how ill had he been? Sam tried to think, but all he could remember was the pain and the feeling of burning up from the inside when he had decided to stop the trials. And then he had woken in the hospital bed as good as new. Just like the time he had died and come back without a scratch. Just like the last time Dean had made a deal with a demon for his life.

Had Dean seriously sold his soul for him? Again? Oh man, he had thought they were over this shit. Over throwing away their own lives for the other's. But this was Dean. This was what he did. And if he happened to have the king of hell at hand and he was dying? He could definitely see his brother not thinking twice about selling his soul to Crowley. Fan-fucking-tastic. Another thing he was going to have to deal with. He needed to talk to Dean, but he knew his brother would deny it until he was blue in the face unless Sam had some proof. He needed to get hold of his medical records. Yeah, with them in hand there was no way Dean could deny what he had done.

But right now they were in the middle of a case and he needed his laptop and time to hack the hospital. Deal with the vampires first, then find out if his suspicions were correct. And if they were, well then he and Dean were gonna have a serious talk about what being a brother really meant.


	26. Chapter 26

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Tribbs, giawinchester, Perdition Raiser and Raheem** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So, sorry for the absence, but I was at a convention at the weekend and didn't have time to write. But here is the next chapter, it's a long one. Hope you like it.**

 **Also I'm not very good at writing fight scenes, so I hope its okay. Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean returned to his and Cas' room to find that the former angel had gone from sleeping on one side to now lying diagonally across the bed. He couldn't help but smile at the sight, especially as Cas seemed to have wrapped himself in the duvet like it was some sort of cocoon and he could no longer see his head.

Moving so he sat on the bed Dean laid his hand gently on Cas' leg. He had learnt last time not to shake him awake, and he really would prefer not to be straggled by his waking boyfriend.

"Hey Cas, time to get up." He said in a gentle tone as he applied pressure to Cas thigh.

"No. It's time for you to come back to bed." Came the mumbled reply from the duvet before it was raised to allow Dean access, and as much as he would like to do just that, he knew he couldn't.

"Sam has gone for breakfast, he'll be back soon. Come on Cas." Dean responded in a persuasive tone. He really needed to get the guy up and dressed before Sam returned. He doubted his brother would like the sight of a naked Cas, and he wasn't sure he actually wanted him to see it either.

"Breakfast?" Castiel asked poking his head out so he could look Dean in the eyes. He did feel hungry, even if he would prefer to spend the morning in bed with Dean, for food he might be willing to move.

"Yeah, pancakes with syrup and coffee." Dean replied with a smirk at the way Cas' hair was sticking up all over the place. It reminded him of the first time he had seen him when he had walked into that barn all those years ago. It was strange, he hadn't even realised he had missed that messy bedhead look the angel had sported for the first few years of their acquaintance. But he was glad he could see it again now.

"We can eat that in bed." Castiel argued still not sure that getting up really was the best plan.

"Yeah, but we also have to go find and kill some vamps, then we get to go home, and share a shower." Dean replied his voice going deeper as he thought over all the things he wanted to do with Cas in the showers in the bunker.

"Well when you put it that way." Castiel responded with a smirk sitting up quickly and grabbing Dean so he could give him a passionate kiss that sent his mind reeling. Once he pulled away from Dean, Castiel jumped out of the bed without a care in the world as he grabbed his clothes and made his way to the bathroom to get ready for the day to come.

* * *

Sam returned just as Castiel came out of the bathroom and he was glad to see that the former angel was dressed. He didn't need, nor want, to know what Cas and Dean had got up to the night before. No all he really wanted to do now was get this case finished so he could get cracking on working out just what his brother had done. But even as he tried to put it out of his mind he couldn't help but notice the little things that helped to cement his belief that Dean had sold his soul, again. Like the way his brother was attentive to Cas, making sure he was good and that he got all the food he wanted, even to the extent that Dean gave Cas some of his. And that was a massive warning sign in Sam's mind. Dean didn't share food, with anyone. No, he needed to stop it. He needed to concentrate on the case, with that resolution in mind Sam turned the conversation to what he had found the previous day, and what they needed to investigate, namely trying to locate the nests hide out. It was time to get down to the reason there were there.

* * *

It took them most of the day, but they finally tracked the nest to an abandoned barn on the outskirts of town. They pulled up just as the light was fading. Sure it would be better to wait until morning, but they didn't want to lose anyone else to these monsters, and every one of the hunting party had reasons for wanting to get this done ASAP. They all had things they wanted to do when they returned home, though Castiel and Dean's plans were far more pleasurable than Sam's.

So it was with the ease of ones who had worked together for a long time that Sam and Dean grabbed the machetes out of the trunk of the car. Dean held one out to Cas as well but the former angel just pulled out his blade instead. It would decapitate a vampire just as well as the weapon Dean was offering him, and this was the one he knew how to fight with best. Once armed they made their silent way to the entrance. It was time to end these vampires fun.

The nest was bigger than they had thought. At first, upon entering the barn they found five vampires getting ready to go out that night. The fighting was fierce, but the three of them could hold their own. It was when the two vampires they hadn't seen joined the party that things started to go sideways.

* * *

Dean lead the three on them inside and as such took on the first two who had their backs to them. He managed to behead one before he had even had time to turn round. Of course this caused the woman who had been at his side to fly at him with all the vengeance of killing the one who had ended her lover's life. That left the other three to split up to take on Castiel and Sam. Deciding that the former angel was the weakest of the three due to his lack of size only one vampire went for him. A mistake on their part, it took Castiel all of 30 seconds to have his head parted from his body.

Turning from the kill Castiel saw the two new vampires enter the fight, the biggest coming for him, more cautious than his recently fallen friend. But Castiel was fine with that, he could take him on.

* * *

Sam was hard pressed fighting off two of the original five, he had just managed to behead one when suddenly another vampire jumped onto his back and tried to sink their teeth into his neck. He tried to shake them off but to no avail, he was just thinking that this was going to go really wrong when suddenly the vampire was pulled off of him. He turned just in time to see Dean behead the bitch who had decided he would make a good dinner. With her taken care of he turned back to make quick work of the one remaining from his original fight.

* * *

Dean was trying to keep track of both Cas and Sam while trying to behead the bitch who was out for his blood. It didn't make for the easiest time, and when he saw another vampire jump onto Sam's back he didn't think. He left his fight to get her off of him, there was no way he was losing his brother. Not now, not ever. But in choosing to save Sam over his own fight he had forgotten the vengeful bitch, right up to the point where he felt her teeth dig into his skin. Son of a bitch. Turning round he managed to dislodge her, but now he was bleeding, and that was never good. He found himself on his back soon enough with her straddled over him and a gleeful look in her eyes as she tried to push his own blade down on his neck. Oh yeah, this was not going well.

* * *

Castiel had been keeping track of the other two even while he fought. He had seen the vampire jump Sam and as such increased his speed so he could finish his fight quickly and go to his friends rescue. Out of the corner of his eye though he saw Dean do one of the stupidest things he had ever seen him do. He turned his back on his opponent and went to help his brother. Stupid stubborn bloody Winchester. He would not lose Dean how he had found him. With that thought in his mind he fought with more aggression than he had in a long time and his opponent stood no chance. As soon as the vampires head rolled away Castiel was moving, running to Dean while swinging his blade beheading the woman on him before she even knew what was coming.

"Thanks Cas." Dean spluttered as blood rained down on his face. He so didn't need that kind of shower thank you very much. But now was not the time for that. He quickly moved, aiming to go to Sam, only to find himself light-headed. On that was just peachy. Blood loss, a hunter's best friend. Luckily it seemed Sam had managed to dispose of the last vampire and the only ones left alive, if not standing, where the three of them.

"Dean how could you have been so foolish. You never turn you back in a fight." Castiel growled down at the man still on his knees in front to him. He couldn't believe what he had just seen, how close he had been to losing him. He didn't understand all the emotions coursing through him but he was pretty sure that the main one right then was anger. Anger at Dean's disregard for his own safety.

"Yeah right Cas, what was I supposed to do? Sammy needed help." Dean argued back. He wasn't gonna have him stand there and tell him he should let Sam come to harm. That wasn't what family did, Cas needed to learn that they would always have each other's back.

"I would have been there in a few seconds." Castiel responded still trying to understand all that was inside his human mind. Trying to understand the anger he had towards the man, as well as the fear he had that Dean could have been hurt or worse. In fact he was trying so hard to work out what was going on inside of him he didn't notice Dean had his hand pressed against his neck.

"Yeah well, we're all alive, so I call that win." Dean muttered. He wasn't in the mood to argue with Cas right then. He needed to get patched up and have a freakin' beer.

"Dean, are you alright?" Sam asked interrupting the argument. He had been standing there processing Cas' words, that Dean had done something foolhardy to save his life. Done something reckless, like his life didn't matter, like he already knew he was going to die. But even while he was filing that away he noticed his brother's hand on his neck. That was never good after a fight with vampires.

"Just peachy." Dean replied with a smirk as he pushed himself up to standing. They needed to get out of here.

"Let me see." Sam responded pulling Dean's hand away to see that the blood flow was already slowing to a stop. It wasn't so bad, his brother would be fine.

"Just a small bite. Guess I didn't taste so good hu?" Dean jokey smiling at both his brother and his boyfriend, hoping to stop either of them worrying.

"You're hurt." Castiel said in a whisper before moving quickly to Dean's side. How could he have not seen he was injured? Without thought Castiel went to place his fingers on Dean's wound, but then he remembered. He couldn't heal him any more. He didn't have the power. He didn't have any powers. Dean was hurt and there was nothing he could do to help him. It was the first time since he had become human that it hit him fully just what it all meant. Just what he had lost. And for the first time since his grace was stolen Castiel truly felt its loss as an ache deep inside of him.


	27. Chapter 27

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank** **Raheem, Perdition Raiser and giawinchester** **for the lovely reviews.**

 **Also the convention was awesome, thanks for asking. I got my Jensen, Jared, Mark and Richard hugs as well as giggling uncontrollably every time I saw Matt (he's like an adorable puppy I just couldn't help myself). So I was very happy, though I think the con blues might have given rise to the depressing end to the last chapter. Hope this one makes up for it.**

 **Anywho this chapter is really long, but there was no way I could split it. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

The three of them returned to the motel with Sam driving. He could see a storm of emotions in the former angel's eyes but he had no idea of what they were. Though he had seen Cas automatically reach out to heal Dean and realise he couldn't, and he guessed that that was a major smack in the face for the guy who had been an angel for eons. He had no idea what to say to Cas, so he had done the only thing he could think of, he had instructed Cas to press the clean cloth he had found in the back of the car to his brothers wound until he had a chance to clean it up and get it covered.

* * *

Dean sat in the back of his baby with one of Cas' hands pressed to his wound and the other wrapped around his neck fingers on his pulse point. He could tell the wound had stopped bleeding, but he also knew Cas needed to feel like he was doing something to help. He had hated the look in former angel's eyes when he remembered that there was nothing he could do to help him. He had looked so friggin' lost and unsure, and that was a look Dean never wanted to see again. Though he knew he would. He and Cas had had a wonderful start to Cas' new life as a human, but Dean knew there would be many things they would come up against that would make Cas realise just what he had lost when his grace had been stolen. That it would be a serious learning curve, and not a good one for him. He just hoped he could be there for him, help Cas through it all. Show him the good parts of being human and hope they countered the negatives of all he had lost.

"Hey Cas, you okay?" He whispered quietly, hoping that both him and the former angel could pretend that Sam wasn't there. It wasn't the ideal place to have this conversation, but he needed to say something to stop the sorrow he could see forming in Cas' eyes.

"I believe it should be me saying that to you Dean." Castiel responded with a small smile, trying to push all the thoughts swirling in his mind away.

"Yeah I know Cas, but still-" Dean responded wondering how to say what he wanted. Wondering how to ask him how he was feeling now he knew the downside of humanity.

"I am fine Dean." Castiel replied in a tone that told Dean that was the end of the conversation. Dean decided to accept that, for now, while Sam was with them. But later, he and Cas were gonna have to talk about all this crap.

Castiel smiled down at Dean glad he had dropped his questions. He knew what Dean wanted to talk about, but he didn't know the words to say what was inside him. It was strange. He had not thought he would miss his grace, and he still didn't. Not really, he didn't want to be an angel, he wanted to be with Dean. But he also wanted to protect him and keep him safe, and heal him if needs be. Of course add in the fact he was feeling… something he did know the name of, but he knew it was very human. And it was because he didn't notice Dean was hurt straight away. What did that say about the person he was? What did it say that he didn't notice the man he cared for bleeding out at his feet? How could he have been so blind? Was it because he was so used to being able to heal such injuries that they didn't register in his mind? Or was he one of those selfish people? The kind who thought only of themselves and their own feelings and never cared to look outside of that. Was that who he was? This new him?

* * *

Once they got back to the motel Sam grabbed the first aid set and got down to cleaning and patching up his brother while Cas just hovered around them, getting him anything he asked for. Anything to be at least seen to be helpful.

Once he was patched up Dean sent his brother away, told him to go and rest before they made their way home the next day. He needed to have a beer, and he needed to talk to Cas, try and work out what was going through his head.

* * *

Castiel let Sam out of the room and moved to grab two bottles of beer. He knew Dean well after all. Walking over to where the other man was reclined on the bed he held out one of the bottles.

"Thanks Cas." Dean said taking it and unscrewing the top before taking a big swig. Damn did he ever need that. It was then he realised he was still the only one on the bed. Cas having retreated back to the lean against the table as he drank his own beer.

"Come over here Cas." he said as gently as he could. He wanted, no needed, to be touching Cas. To remind him of all the good things humanity had to offer, namely himself.

"I am fine here Dean." Castiel replied still not sure he could work out his emotions. But he knew he did not deserve to be with Dean after he had not realised he was hurt. He did not deserve to lie next to him, or hold him in his arms. He was far too selfish for a man like Dean, that he knew.

"Please Cas… I need you." Dean whispered the words he had said once before, though for a very different reason.

Looking into Dean's green eyes and seeing the need there Castiel knew he could not refuse him, even if he should.

"Very well." He conceded moving so he was sitting on the bed next to Dean, though still not touching him.

"Cas, what's wrong?" Dean asked turning to the man next to him who seemed to be determined not to meet his eyes.

"I didn't notice you were hurt Dean. I failed you." Castiel replied looking down at the beer in his hand. He didn't deserve this. He shouldn't be here.

"Cas, its fine, I'm fine." Dean reassured him, moving one of his hands so it rested on Cas' leg, gently stroking the inside of his thigh, trying to show him he didn't hold a grudge against that fact.

"But you might not have been and it would be my fault, because I was too busy worrying about these… feelings inside me to notice." Castiel responded turning to Dean with frown of self-loathing. It was a look Dean had seen far too many times in a mirror to ever want to see on Cas' face.

"You've been human for a few days Cas. Of course you're gonna worry about the crap that comes with it. Hell I've been human all my life and I still have trouble dealing with emotional shit." Dean replied trying to reassure him. Trying to show him that it was okay, that what he did was only human.

"But Dean-" Castiel started, trying to think of a way to explain to Dean why what he had done was wrong, but Dean wasn't taking any of that crap. There was enough self-blame in this family as it was. He did not need Cas thinking every time he got injured it was his fault too.

"No buts Cas. It's gonna take time to adjust." Dean explained trying to find the right note between forceful and gentle. It was a lot harder than it looked, Sammy always made this seem so easy...

"I was so selfish though." Castiel replied not ready to take what Dean was saying as the truth. He still had that horrible feeling inside him which seemed to be twisting his guts. He did not like it.

"You couldn't be selfish if you tried angel." Dean responded with a shake of his head at the words coming from Cas' mouth. The guy had never once been selfish in all the times he had known him. Disillusioned, naïve, sure, but selfish? No way.

"I am not an angel Dean." Castiel glared back. He did not like Dean using that word. He was not an angel. He was human, so why would Dean call him something he was not? Did Dean wish he still was what he had been? Did Dean regret what they had become to each other?

"To me you are. You are still the one who gripped me tight and raised me from perdition. You are the one who seared you hand print into my shoulder. You're my angel Cas, even if you don't have your grace. You're still my angel. You marked me as yours, and I will always be yours." Dean replied earnestly as he moved quickly to sit up so he could put his hand on Cas' cheek and stare into those deep blue eyes. He was an idiot to use that term of endearment, but it had slipped out. And what he was saying was the truth. Cas would always be his angel in his mind, even if he didn't have any of his powers, he was still Cas.

"I do not deserve to have you Dean." Castiel whispered staring at the honest look in the green eyes which had caught his own. Dean meant his words, he truly thought of him as his angel. He could not believe the… goodness of this man. He was so much more than Castiel had even thought he was. If either of them were what an angel should be according to humanity, it was Dean. He was so perfect.

"Yeah you do Cas, you really do. I'm the one who doesn't deserve you." Dean replied refusing to listen to the voice in the back of his mind that reminded him that this connection with Cas had only come about because of the deal he had made. That he was doing this only to save Sam. But it wasn't about that, not anymore. This was so much more than just saving Sam's life. This was about being with the guy who affected him as no one else ever had. About being with the guy he knew he could care for forever if he had the chance.

"Dean, don't be stupid." Castiel responded with a shake of his head. He had done nothing to deserve Dean's care or feelings.

At that Dean decided he didn't want to argue with Cas anymore about who was more deserving of the others affections, he just wanted to revel in them. As such he moved so he could seal his lips to Cas' kissing him gently and lovingly, trying to put into the movements of his lips all the words he hadn't said. All the feelings he hadn't yet confessed to the man next to him.

Of course the kiss did not stay gentle for long. It never could between the two of them, and they soon found passionate intruding upon the moment and the need to be closer interrupting their thoughts. Soon their clothes were being removed, and Castiel was lying on top of Dean, bare chest to bare chest, both breathing heavily as their lips and skin moved against the others.

"Make love to me Cas." Dean whispered into the fevered moment, knowing that right then he wanted nothing more than to give himself to the angel on top of him. To feel him inside him, making him his in every way.

Castiel heard the words through the daze of lust and pulled himself back from the brink which would have caused him to strip Dean naked and enter him without thought. He would not be selfish in this. Not this time.

"Dean you are injured." He managed to say as he pulled back so he was leaning on his elbows over Dean, causing enough distance so that they could both think reasonably clearly.

"In the neck, I'll be fine. I want you Cas, I need you." Dean responded trying to pull his angel back to him, trying to get him back to where they were and where he wanted them to go.

"I don't know…" Castiel started, resisting Dean's advances causing the other man to stop and think.

"It's okay if you're not ready Cas. We'll find something else to do instead, its fine." Dean replied seeing that maybe this was too much for Cas. I mean the guy had only been human for a few days and it wasn't like he had ever had sex before. Dean needed to slow down, and make sure Cas knew he was happy to go at whatever speed he wanted to.

"No Dean, I want to… but I don't know how. Well I know the theory, but… I never done this before." Castiel mumbled feeling that he was somehow letting Dean down by not knowing instinctively what to do.

Dean couldn't help but chuckle silently at Cas' words. Did he think Dean went round bottoming it all the time of something? I mean in this he and Cas were on the same playing field in the experience stakes.

"Neither have I Cas, not like this. Let's learn together." He said hoping to reassure the man he was with. He was ready for this, ready to give himself to Cas, and if Cas was ready to take him, then it was time to get down to the fun.

"Very well, do you have any lubrication?" Castiel asked tilting his head at the man below him. He knew when two men had sex that this was a necessity so that it caused the least amount of pain to the man being entered, and he did not want to cause Dean pain.

"With my shaving stuff." Dean replied with a smirk making Castiel roll his eyes at him.

"You came prepared." He muttered as he climbed off of Dean and went to get the small bottle.

"Hunters moto, always be ready for anything." Dean replied with a chuckle as he watched Cas go and collect that which they needed.

When Castiel returned he proceeded to strip them both naked before he climbed back onto the bed to lie at Dean's side. The frenzied passion from before had left them both, and now there was just a slow burn of need and desire thumping through them both. They were no longer gripped in the haze of lust, but fully there for what they were about to do, and both knew that that was exactly how they wanted their first time to be.

Castiel moved Dean's leg so they were bent up at the knee and moved his hand towards Dean's hole so he could prepare him for his entry. But he touched him nowhere else. There was no kisses or words of endearment. Just Cas' lubed finger at Dean's entrance as he stared into the other man's eyes.

Dean couldn't stop himself tensing as Cas pushed his finger inside him for the first time. It was an automatic reaction, even if that was exactly where he wanted Cas.

"Relax Dean, trust me." Castiel whispered into Dean's ear as he moved closer to the other man. He then pressed his lips gently to Dean's and kissed him softly as he completed his finger's entrance.

With that one finger moving slowly and gently in and out of Dean, Castiel moved his mouth from Deans and proceeded to kiss down his neck and chest, moving ever closer to his cock which was standing tall from Dean's pubic hair.

By the time Cas found himself kneeing between Dean's legs his finger was moving so smoothly he knew he could insert another, so looking up and catching Dean's eyes with his once more he did just that. Pushing in the second finger so he could stretch Dean's hole so that eventually he would be able to accommodate his erection.

Dean lay there, trapped in Cas' eyes as he felt himself being stretched wider, but this time he didn't tense. He relaxed against the feeling, and when Cas's fingers hit prostate Dean found his back arching of the bed in the blinding pleasure he felt from the contact. Damn this was so much better than he had dreamed, and they hadn't even got to the good bit yet.

Castiel watched Dean's obvious joy in what he was doing with a smile of pleasure. He was doing that to him. He was causing these feelings in Dean. Him. When he felt Dean was ready for him to insert a third finger he decided to increase the other man's pleasure. To see how much he could make Dean squirm. With that thought as he pushed his fingers into Dean's hole he lowered his mouth onto Dean's erection and suckled as he had done the night before. Revelling in the remembered fun he had had with licking and sucking. And Dean, well his mind had left him. Cas' fingers were moving deliciously inside him and his mouth was swallowing him just as he had the previous evening. It was all Dean could do to moan Cas' name over and over again in the hopes it would encourage him to do more, and not stop, all at the same time.

Finally Dean was ready. It was time for the finale. Castiel pulled away from Dean's erection at the same time as he removed his fingers causing an involuntary whimper to come from Dean's lips as he opened his eyes and looked at the man between his legs with a begging expression.

"Don't worry Dean. It will be even better soon." Castiel said, his voice sounding more like rasping gravel with the desire he felt pumping inside him.

With those words spoken Castiel lined himself up at Dean's entrance, holding Dean's legs up so he could have a smooth entrance and cause no pain to his partner. This was his first time after all, he wanted to do it right.

* * *

Dean lay there and watched Cas raise his legs and he saw the look of extreme concertation on his face. It was so typical of Cas it made him smile. Only his angel would look like he was solving the world's problems when having sex for the first time.

Once he felt ready Castiel pushed into Dean gently, making sure that he didn't go to fast, he didn't want to cause Dean pain after all. But soon enough he was completely encased by Dean and he couldn't help himself Castiel let out a low moan of Dean's name and let his head drop back and his eyes close at the feel of it. This was so much more than he had ever thought it would be. The feel of Dean's warmth surrounding him, it was so much better than the feel of Dean's mouth. It was perfect.

"Hey Cas, you gonna move or just stay there?" Dean asked after a minute of Cas just sitting there taking in the feeling of the muscles holding his erection tight.

"Behave Dean, or I might just change my mind." Castiel replied bringing his head back so he could smirk into Dean's eyes.

"Yeah I don't think so." Dean replied leaning up and grabbing Cas and pulling him down on top of him, changing the position so they both gasped in pleasure at the new angle.

"Now I would suggest ya move my angel." Dean whispered wrapping his hands into Cas hair as his legs wrapped around his waist.

"Well if you insist." Castiel responded smirking into Dean's neck before arranging himself on his elbows so he could watch his lovers face as he moved in and out of him for the very first time. It was definitely a sight he wanted to see.

With that there love making proceeded gently, lovingly. There was no frenzied passion or hard pounding as Dean was used to. This was a first time for the both of them. And not just the sex or the position. This was a first in the fact that they both deep down loved the one they were with, even if neither of them were ready yet to say the words. Dean knew this was the first time of the rest of his life. This was his last first time, because from now on he was Cas'. And Castiel, well Dean was the only person he could ever image doing this with, being with in this way. Together they learnt the right angles and pressure to cause maximum pleasure for them both.

It wasn't long before Castiel increased his pace, feeling the need for more, for faster, and looking down at the man below him he changed his position so he could move his hand and take Dean's erection in it. Rubbing up and down in time with his movements, and making Dean once more arch off of the bed.

"Cas." Dean managed to moan knowing he was close to coming and wanting the other man to join him.

"Come for me Dean." Castiel whispered into his ear sensually. Those words forced Dean over the edge and he couldn't stop himself from orgasming all over Cas' hand.

Castiel felt Dean's muscle tighten as his orgasm washed over him and he let himself join the man below him, letting his erection eject his come into Dean before collapsing down on the man below him, completely spent from the physical and emotion feelings surging through him.

And Dean just let his legs relax down and wrapped Cas in his arms. That was more than he had ever thought it would be, but he also knew it could only get better. Damn he wasn't sure if it really could, but he couldn't wait to find out.


	28. Chapter 28

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank** **Raheem, Perdition Raiser and giawinchester** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So I know this is a very short chapter, but I hope you like it all the same.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Sam sat back from his computer and reached for the beer which had gone warm. He wished it was something stronger, but beer was what he had. It had taken him a few hours of hacking and manoeuvring before he had been able to access his own medical records, but the file was now staring up at him from the screen. He turned his eyes once more to it in the vague hope that maybe the words had changed in the last few minutes. But no, it was still there as it had been before.

The patient was beyond medical help. There was nothing else that could be done for him. Basically it was saying that it was in the hands of god, or his brother and king of hell. Damn it Dean, why? Why go down this route again? He had been ready to die, sure he hadn't wanted too, but if he had, he would have been okay with that. But no, Dean just couldn't let him go. Dean couldn't live without him, and that was what this was all about. Not saving his life or that shit. No his brother just didn't want to be alone. Well he wasn't alone now anyway, he had Cas. So him making a deal with Crowley really didn't mean a fucking thing did it? Then there was the question of just what kind of deal they had made. He knew Crowley wasn't stupid, there was bound to be some sort of stipulation if anything happened to him so it wasn't like he could summon and kill the bastard to free Dean.

Then of course there was the fact that Crowley had been talking to Dean that morning. Surely if they had a sell your soul in x amount of years there was no need for conversations. Maybe Dean had made a deal to help him instead? I mean at the time no one knew Cas was human, surely Crowley would have realised that if Dean sold him his soul Cas would just go to hell and bring him back, right? Was that what Dean had been counting on when he made the deal? That Cas would pull him again? Of course the former angel could do jack shit about it now. Did Cas even know? He doubted it. If he did he imagined Cas would have more than likely beaten the crap out of Dean for his stupidity, especially if his reaction to Dean's behaviour tonight was anything to go by.

Of course Sam was only speculating, the only way he would get answers to his questions was to confront his brother, but he also knew he needed to do it when Cas wasn't around. Which considering how Dean and the former angel were almost glued at the hip, it was practically a non-existence time. He was going to have to wait until he could corner Dean at the bunker, because he needed to know just what Dean had given up for him. He needed to know so he could fix it somehow. Maybe Crowley would take another deal with him instead? Something where none of them ended up in hell? Maybe they could just work together? Oh man, was he really considering working with the king of hell just to release his brother from hell? But he knew the answer to that. Dean had done this for him, he would do anything he could to save him in return.

Damn it Dean.

Right, what Sam needed to know was exactly what Dean had done. He needed to know it all. Then he could work on the rest. With that though he closed his computer and made his way to his bed. If he was going to have to have this talk with Dean the next day, he was going to need to get some sleep. He would have to be top of his game to get the truth, but get it he would. That was not in doubt in his mind. He would find out what it cost to save his life, and he **would** make it right.


	29. Chapter 29

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Raheem, Perdition Raiser and giawinchester** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last up date.**

 **So this isn't the chapter I had planned to write, but it's the one that came to me. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own supernatural.**

* * *

Dean woke the next morning feeling the warmth from the body curled into his side. He also registered a slightly painful sensation from his ass, but he guessed that was to be expected. And hey, the pleasure certainly outweighed any and all pain he would get as a result. He turned on the bed so he could look at the sleeping Cas at his side with a smile on his face as he remembered how gentle he had been the previous night. How perfect it had felt to have him filling him and moving in him. It was a seriously strange thing to get his head around. He had never taken himself as the submissive one in any relationship, and yet here he was glorying in being taken by his angel. Hmm, he was gonna have to make sure he didn't call Cas that too much, he didn't want the guy thinking he wanted as he used to be or any of that shit. Because if truth be told, he wanted Cas just as he was.

* * *

Castiel had been in pleasurable oblivion when he felt a strange feeling. A prickling on his skin. He had no idea what it was about, but it forced him from his slumber. Stretching his body he found he was once more plastered to Dean's side, though this time they were both completely naked, just how he liked it. With a murmur of pleasure he ran his hand up Dean's chest as he opened his eyes only to be greeted with Dean's smiling down at him.

"Morning Cas." Dean said loving the look of sleepy Cas, he looked so cute when he was waking up.

"Hello Dean." Castiel mumbled before looking away and frowning as he remembered the feeling which had forced him awake.

"Hey, what's up?" Dean asked putting his finger under Cas' chin and turning him so there eyes met once more.

"I had the strangest sensation when I was sleeping. My skin… tingled." Castiel replied trying to find the right words to describe what he had experienced.

"Turnabout's fair game." Dean chuckled when he realised what Cas was saying. It served the former angel right, he had caused Dean to wake that way far too many times in the past.

"I don't understand, what do you mean Dean?" Castiel asked frowning up at him. What was Dean talking about now?

"I was watching you sleeping, it can have that effect some times." Dean responded smirking at the former angel at his side.

"I'm pretty sure you have regularly informed me that watching someone sleep is 'creepy'. And yet now you are doing it to me?" Castiel asked in fake disgruntlement as he raised himself onto his elbow so he was staring down at Dean.

"Hey what can I say, you're adorable when you're asleep." Dean responded with his patented charming smile on his lips. Damn he loved how sassy Cas could get.

"Only when I'm asleep?" Castiel asked innocently as he trailed his fingers across Dean's chest, following the pattern of his tattoo before moving them to map out his muscles.

"Well not only then. You're kinda cute when you're trying to puzzle things out too. Oh and then there when you're eating, trying something for the first time, I kinda like the look you get then as well." Dean responded trying to keep up the light-hearted teasing, even though Cas' fingers where doing strange things to his breathing. Especially when they started circling his abs before tracing the line of hair that lead down to his cock, not that he touched it damn him. Cas was, Dean decided, becoming quite a tease, and Dean loved it.

"Hmm, any other times?" Castiel asked looking at Dean through his lashes as he moved his hand lower and lower, now dipping his fingers into the where Dean's hips met his body.

"A few." Dean replied with a groan, giving up all attempts at not showing how Cas was affecting him.

"Well I have to say you are rather adorable too, on occasion." Castiel responded with a smirk at Dean's breathlessness. He liked him like this, he liked having this power over the man who he knew was so strong. Being able to be the one who Dean could and was willing to surrender to.

"Oh yeah? Like when?" Dean asked forcing his eyes to Cas' and making his voice steady so they could continue the flirtatious conversation.

"When you are singing off key in the car-" Castiel started to state only to be interrupted.

"Hey, I have a great singing voice." Dean responded, he may well be slowly losing his mind with what Cas was doing, or not doing, with his fingers, but he wasn't gonna stand for Cas saying he couldn't sing. He was friggin' awesome at singing.

"Of course you do Dean." Castiel replied with a slightly patronising tone, not that Dean really heard it as it was at this point Cas' fingers moved so they were now trailing through his pubic hair, so close to where he really wanted them.

"now where was I, oh yes, you are also rather adorable when you're cooking, but I think I like you best when you are underneath me as I move inside you." Castiel whispered into Dean's ear as his fingers finally found Dean's erection and started to slowly stroke up and down.

"And there I was thinking I was the one with sex on the brain all the time." Dean responded breathlessly completely at the mercy of the man lying next to him. But he was happy with that, he was willing he put himself into Cas hands, he knew he would never do anything to hurt him. He trusted Cas, and he was, in his mind at least, Cas' to do with as he wished. That was the deal he'd made with himself.

"Are you up for trying again?" Castiel asked wrapping his hand around Dean cock firmly though he continued to stroke slowly.

"Oh yeah Cas, I'm very much up for it." Dean responded nodding his head to make sure that the former angel knew just how sure he was that he wanted to be fucked again. Of course at the back of his mind, in the rational part that had been supressed, he knew that he would hurt even more if they did it again, but what the hell, live for the now right?

"Good, so am I." Castiel replied deeply as he moved to capture Dean's mouth with his. There was none of the sweet kisses from the night before this time. It was straight to the tongues and lips clashing as Castiel moved so he was pressing his body down on top of Dean's.

Castiel reached out for the bottle of lube he had left conveniently on the bedside table and soon had his finger covered and posed to enter Dean. His body was screaming out for him to forget about that, to just push himself inside the man below him, but he wouldn't do that. There was no way Dean could take him without preparation, not yet at any rate.

"Cas, just fuck me already." Dean muttered from below him as he felt the finger at his hole once more. He wanted Cas inside him now, he didn't want the fucking foreplay.

"If I do Dean, you will be in a lot of pain. So patience." Castiel muttered moving his finger inside of Dean as he kissed his way down his body. Oh how he loved kissing Dean's chiselled chest, running his tongue along the indentations of where the muscles met. It was glorious.

"I ain't a patient man." Dean growled at him squirming under Cas' ministrations. Damn they were making him so hard, that friggin' tongue was… it was the most freakin' awesome torture he had even known.

"I know, but it is a virtue." Castiel smirked up at the man who had his eyes closed and could luckily not see him. He decided it was time for him and Dean to stop talking and get down to business, as it were. As such he moved so he was between Deans legs. He was about to put his mouth over Dean's erection and torture him that way as he had done the previous night while he prepared him for his entry, but then another idea came into his mind making him smirk even more as he moved lower. He needed to prepare Dean, but no one said he had to do it with his fingers only.

Dean had his eyes closed but he could feel Cas' breath on his cock and he was anticipating his mouth closing over it. Waiting for the glorious feel of that wet warmth, but what he got instead made his eyes shoot open and a strangled moan to emerge from his mouth. Because rather than suck him off, Cas had penetrated him with his tongue. Oh holy hell. That was so… oh god. He had never even considered that idea, but fucking hell, he was so enjoying that feeling. The warm and wet prodding with Cas' fingers, he could do nothing but moan and press down, wanting more, wanting it all, now.

Castiel felt Dean move above him and he couldn't help but smile. He was definitely enjoying his partners response to his idea, he was glad Dean liked it. He wanted to make sure Dean had a good time with him. After all the other man was a lot more experienced than him, he had had sex with a lot of people. Castiel just hoped he could make it so Dean wanted no one else but him. That was his wish, to have Dean all to himself for as long as he could.

Finally deciding Dean was ready Castiel moved so he was over the other man, making sure he was in the position to push inside of him, but he waited. He liked looking into Dean's eyes as he entered him, it gave him… something. He wasn't sure what, all he knew was it was a feeling he wanted to experience again and again.

Dean opened his eyes and looked up at Cas. he opened his mouth to tell him to get the hell on with it, but before the words could leave his lips Cas pressed inside of him making a moan come out instead of anything remotely intelligent, or even coherent.

Castiel watched as Dean's eyes roll back at his entrance, and a predatory smile appeared on his face. He was doing this to Dean. He was his to do with as he wished, he was the one driving him to such ecstasy. It was a power Castiel had never even considered having over the other man, never even considered Dean would grant him, but now he had, he revelled in it. He started to move, slowly at first, but soon his pushes turned more defined, more forceful, causing more wordless sounds of bliss to come from the man below him, making him move harder and faster, giving Dean all he was asking for even if he couldn't form the words to say so.

It didn't last long, but by the time they had finished both Dean and Castiel found themselves covered in sweat and breathless at the passion they had just shared. It was as different to what they had done the night before as chalk and cheese, but it was just as good, and just as special to the both of them. Just as perfect.


	30. Chapter 30

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Guest, Perdition Raiser and giawinchester** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, time for Dean and Sam to have a little chat I feel. Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own supernatural.**

* * *

 _'Get up, get out, get away from these liars  
'Cause they don't get your soul or your fire  
Take my hand, knot your fingers through mine  
And we'll walk from this dark room for the last time.'_

 _Open Your Eyes – By Snow Patrol_

* * *

Dean drove them back to the bunker with Sam in the passenger seat and Cas in the back. As such his eyes spent more time looking in his rear-view mirror than they did looking at the road. He couldn't help it, he couldn't keep his eyes from flicking to the man he kept picturing lying over him as he had this morning while he pounded into his ass. The ass which was now pretty sore but damn, it had been worth it. he was just glad that the bunker wasn't that far away, because for the first time in his life Dean wanted to get out of baby, and not just cos sitting wasn't the most comfortable position right then. No he wanted to spend more time with Cas, he could never spend enough time with Cas in his mind.

Castiel on the other hand let his eyes drift to the scenery they were passing, though he did bring them back often to see if Dean was watching the road or if he could meet those gorgeous green eyes with his own. Of course every time they did meet Castiel found himself smiling, remembering the pleasure they had shared that morning, and enjoying the idea that they were heading back to the bunker. The bunker with the decent showers. How soon could he and Dean share one without Sam and Kevin knowing exactly what they were doing? Not that he had sex on the brain as Dean seemed to think he did, it was more he wanted to try all these new things, experience all that he could, as soon as he could. And he wanted to experience them all with Dean, which of course enviably meant they would end up naked. He liked Dean naked, a lot. In fact sitting there and stating out of the window he found himself picturing the other man naked and in the shower, water running down his chest. Oh yes, two of Castiel's favourite human things, he really couldn't wait. But now was probably not the time to be thinking such thoughts, he realised as he felt a stirring in penis. He really didn't want to get a boner when sitting in the car with Sam and Dean. If he remembered correctly that was not a socially acceptable situation.

Sam spent the journey paying no attention to his brother or the former angel. He was too busy trying to work out what he would say when he managed to get Dean alone. He had already realised that he needed to have this conversation with his brother ASAP. He couldn't keep his suspicions inside for long, and if he didn't get Dean alone soon, he knew he would just blurt it out in front of Cas. And yeah sure, the former angel needed to know, but he was hoping to get Dean to tell him, or more to the point he was hoping his brother had plans to tell Cas, but he didn't hold out much hope of that happening.

Finally they arrived back at the bunker and Castiel turned to Dean with a suggestive look he tried to hide. He fooled no one.

"I think I'm going to have a decent shower." He growled in his deep voice making Dean's blood pressure rise at the idea of Cas in the shower, or him and Cas in the shower, and all he wanted to do them to do under the water.

"Great. Dean, can I have a word?" Sam said not paying any attention to Cas. All he knew was if he was going to have a shower, then he had loads of time to talk to Dean. The guy was like a girl in the bathroom, he could be in there for hours.

"Umm, yeah okay. I'll come find you in a bit Cas." Dean replied frowning at his brother before turning and giving Cas a meaningful glance that said quite clearing, I'll come find you in the shower once this idiot has said whatever it is he has to say'.

"Very well." Castiel responded, slightly put out that Dean would not be joining him straight away, but it would give him time to enjoy the relaxing water massaging his skin, and Dean would come to him one he and Sam were done. No doubt Sam wanted to discuss Dean's behaviour on the hunt or make sure his wound was indeed getting better. Sam hadn't checked it that morning after all.

"So what's up Sammy?" Dean asked as he made his way to the kitchen to grab a beer. He might as well have one while he listened to whatever his brother had to say, before he joined Cas, hmm Cas…

"Dean, what happened when I was in hospital?" Sam asked hoping the words would cause his brother to confess the truth, even if he knew that was highly unlikely.

"What'd ya mean?" Dean asked after a beat as he swallowed a large mouthful of beer. Why was Sam bringing that up? What had caused him to ask that question? Was this about the fact he saw him talking to Crowley? Oh god, what if Sam had found out what he had done?

"My treatment, what did the doctors do to save me?" Sam asked glaring at Dean as he saw his eyes widen. The look on his brother's face confirmed to him what he had already worked out. God damn it Dean.

"I don't know, they put you on a drip and some shit, and you were fine." Dean tried to fudge, even if he knew it was no good. But no matter what he wasn't gonna tell Sam what he had done to save him. His brother would not appreciate it he knew.

"So my miraculous recovery had nothing to do with you making a deal with Crowley then? Because what I read from my medical notes clearly said there was nothing they could do for me." Sam responded bitchfacing Dean for all he was worth. He was done with his brother's lies, he needed to know the truth, and they needed to work together to fix the whole damn thing.

"What the hell Sam? Why you looking at that shit?" Dean demanded going on the defensive rather than answering the question.

"So you did make a deal. How could you be so stupid Dean?" Sam responded running his hand through his hair in frustration. How had they come full circle? How had they ended up back here once again?

"This has nothing to do with you." Dean stated simply crossing his arms as he glared back at Sam. He wanted nothing more than to say screw you to his brother and storm out, but he needed to make sure that this conversation didn't go any further, and he especially didn't want Cas to know about any of this shit.

"You sold your soul to save my live, I think that makes it everything to do with me." Sam responded loudly in a tone disbelief at Dean's words. Had nothing to do with him? Really?

"Keep your friggin' voice down, and I didn't." Dean replied through gritted teeth as he turned to the doorway to make sure neither Kevin nor Cas were there.

"Didn't what?" Sam asked confused now. What was Dean on about?

"Sell my soul, Crowley wasn't interested." Dean responded with a sigh. He couldn't let his brother think he was gonna become a hell hounds chew toy again.

"Oh god Dean… what did you sell?" Sam asked his eyes going wide at various ideas going through his head. Just what had his brother got them into this time? But when all Dean did was stare at the floor and not reply Sam found his frustration returning. "Dean tell me, or so help me god I'll-"

"You'll what? Summon his ass? Go right ahead." Dean interrupted, he'd had enough of this shit. He had done what he needed to do to save Sam's life, why couldn't he just let it go? Accept it and move on? It was done, and nothing could change it, so did his brother really need to know all the friggin' details?

"Do you really want me to hear your deal from him or you?" Sam demanded, but when all he got in answer was a shrug he changed tactics and brought out his puppy dog eyes and pleading look as he begged his brother gently. "Please just tell me Dean, I need to know."

"No Sammy, you really don't. I'm doin' my part." Dean responded with a shake of his head. He couldn't tell Sam, he just… couldn't.

"Your part? What does that mean?" Sam asked wondering if maybe he had agreed to help Crowley defeat Abaddon or something, yeah he could see Dean doing that, but from what he could tell his brother had been doing nothing but spending his time with Cas. So how was he helping Crowley?

"Nothing okay? It means nothing." Dean stated clearly, he had slipped up there, given Sammy just enough that he would want more. Son of a bitch, he just wanted this conversation to be over.

Sam looked at his brother and realised that there was no way he would tell him anything more, but thinking about how Dean had been helping Cas, about how his brother now was with Cas, and Sam realised there was one thing he could say that would no doubt get his brother to spill his guts. He would hate him for it, but he could live with that. He needed to know the cost of his life, and Dean would get over it.

"Dean if you don't tell me… I'm going to tell Cas." Sam threatened after taking a deep breath, even so he was unprepared for his brother's response to those words.

At Sam words Dean moved. He didn't think, he just grabbed his brother by the scruff of his neck and slammed him back against the counter as he hissed "don't you dare."

"It's your choice, what did you sell?" Sam responded refusing to allow Dean's behave cow him. He would not back down from this, he needed to know the truth.

"Nothing. It wasn't like that." Dean finally replied stepping back from Sam and letting him go with a sigh. He couldn't risk his brother telling Cas he had made a deal, because he knew if the former angel asked him, there was no way he wouldn't be able to tell him. And he would tell him the truth, the complete truth, and then Cas would never speak to him again and his brother would die. It would have all been for nothing. No he couldn't risk that happening, not now, not ever.

"Then what did Crowley want?" Sam asked straightening his shirt and running his hand through his hair so it fell once more into place.

"The heart of an angel, or more specifically, Cas'." Dean replied so quietly that Sam wasn't sure he had heard correctly. Because there was no way…

"Wait what?! He wants you to kill Cas?" He asked his brother in disbelief. No, there was no way Dean would ever hurt Cas, no matter what was at stake, Sam knew that deep down in his bones. Dean could no more hurt Cas than he could him. His brother could never hurt the ones he loved.

"No! Don't be stupid, I would never do that." Dean replied rounding on his brother with a disgusted look that he even thought he could do such a thing. I mean, what did he take him for? Some kind of monster?

"Then how could you give him his heart unless…" at that Sam's eyes widened as he put two and two together and made four. Because he had realised that there was a less literal meaning to Dean's words. And it made so much sense, but no, his brother wouldn't… would he?

"Oh god, tell me that's not what all this is about. Tell me your relationship with Cas is not the result of some deal you made with the king of fucking hell." Sam whispered at Dean in horror. No his brother wouldn't, right?

"No, not entirely." Dean mumbled in reply hating the look Sam was giving him. It was worse than the one he had received when Sam had thought he was gonna kill Cas. God damn it.

"It is isn't it? You're making Cas fall in love with you because Crowley told you too. I can't believe you would do something so… cruel." Sam responded his voice gaining strength as the situation became clear in his mind. Even if he didn't want to believe his brother would do that, he knew somewhere deep inside that that was exactly what Dean **would** do. He would willing agree to idea of making Cas fall in love with him in return for his life. It was such a twisted, vile idea, it made Sam's skin crawl, but he had to accept that to Dean it no doubt looked like a good solution. Sometimes he really did wonder if he knew his brother, or more to the point, if he really wanted to know him.

"No Sam. okay sure the idea of me and Cas may have come about from a deal, but I truly like the guy, hell I'm planning on spending the rest of my life with him. Would I do that if it was just because of some freakin' deal?" Dean defended himself. Because while sure, the idea of him and Cas came from his deal with Crowley, he hated the idea of Sam thinking that that was the only thing between them. He and Cas had something, it was special and more than he had ever had in his life, and he refused to let his brother dirty it with his deal. He was not that kind of guy, right? Though even as he thought the words he remembered that that was exactly the guy who had made the deal in the first place. It was only by fluke he cared for Cas at all, and even if he hadn't felt for him as he now did, Dean knew deep down he would still be doing what he was. He would do it to save Sammy, and he would give his life to Cas for that, without question. What did that say about him? But it didn't matter, he cared for Cas, he wanted Cas, and that was all that was important now.

"Yeah it does. Guilt and self-sacrifice are staple Dean Winchester emotions and moves." Sam spat at his brother with disgust. He should have realised that there was something seriously wrong with Dean wanting to be with Cas. He had thought it was because his brother knew he only had a finite time, but of course that wouldn't have driven his brother into the former angel's arms. He wouldn't want Cas to be hurt when he died. But deciding to spend his life in a relationship with a guy he didn't love just to save Sam's life? Yeah that was definitely something Dean would do, without thought or question.

"You don't know anything about it." Dean growled narrowing his eyes at his brother. He would not let Sam sully what he and Cas had. No way in hell.

"I know that if you hadn't made a deal to save my life you would never have got together with Cas." Sam stated simply glaring at his brother, daring him to refute his words, even if they both knew he couldn't. Dean would never approach Cas without some serious incentive.

"Does the how matter? I care for him, he cares for me, what's more important?" Dean argued back. The how didn't matter, it was done, and now he was happy, why couldn't his brother just accept that and let it go? Let him be happy for once in his fucking life?

"But you don't Dean. You've just convinced yourself you do because you have to." Sam responded with a shake of his head at his brother's words. Oh sure Dean loved Cas as a brother, but did he really care for him in a romantic way? Or had he just convinced himself that he did?

"No." Dean replied shaking his head over and over at Sam words even if they snuck through the cracks in his mind. Was what he was feeling just because of the deal? Because he knew he was going to spend the rest of his life with Cas, or at least as much of it as the angel wanted? Was it just his minds way of dealing with the fact he couldn't accept that he could hurt Cas with this deal? No, he cared for Cas, he did. He was attracted to his gorgeous body, hell he had even allowed the guy to fuck him, twice. It was real. Sam didn't know shit about it, right?

Sam could see the pain and horror in his brother's eyes at his words and he hated that he was the one to put those feelings there. It was then he remembered how Dean and Cas had always been before, how they had stared at each other, and how he had always felt like he could cut the sexual tension with a knife. So yeah, okay Dean did like Cas that way and he knew it.

This was not the right time to discuss this, he was lashing out in anger. He needed to cool down, they both did.

"Fine, whatever, I can't… I just can't be here right now." he responded in a defeated tone before walking out of the kitchen without looking back. He needed to get out of this place, away from all this twisted shit. Go somewhere he could either try to work out just what the hell was going on, or somewhere he could pretend it wasn't happening. Somewhere with normal people, the kind that didn't trade their best friends heart for their brothers life. Fucking Dean.


	31. Chapter 31

**Hello my dears. I want to thank** **giawinchester** **for the lovely review.**

 **So I wasn't supposed to be writing this, but what the hell right? Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean returned to his room after Sam left and found Cas' clothes laid out on the chair. He still couldn't believe what his brother had said, or more to the point he could believe it. And that was the problem. His mind had started questioning his feelings for the former angel, even if he hated it. Even if his whole being rejected the ideas. Looking down at the clothes he wondered what to do now. He knew he should go and join Cas in the shower, but what if his feelings for him weren't real? What if they were just a construct of his fucked up mind? Did it really matter? Did it really, in all truth, change anything in the long run? No was the simple answer to that. So no matter which was the truth, his feelings or his delusions, he needed to be with Cas, needed Cas to love him. He needed to go to Cas, and he needed to do it now. With that thought Dean walked back out of his room and made his way to the bathroom, time to find out, for his own mind if for nothing else, who was right. Him or Sam.

* * *

He entered the bathroom, finding Cas had left it unlocked for him, and the just leant against the door as his eyes adjusted to the steam filled room, or at least adjusted enough to see the silhouette of the naked man in the shower.

"Dean is that you?" Castiel asked sticking his head out but making sure the rest of his body was covered.

"Who else is it gonna be angel?" Dean responded smiling involuntarily at the sight of water dripping off Cas' hair and on to his face. Oh yeah, he was definitely sexually attracted to guy.

"Dean." Castiel growled frowning at the man for calling him angel, then he frowned even more when he realised he was still fully clothed. "Are you planning on washing your clothes in the shower?" He asked sassily raising his eyebrow at Dean. He wanted his man naked thank you very much.

"No, just couldn't wait to see you." Dean smirked back. He then proceeded to remove his clothes and climb into the large shower, standing under the water for a second with his eyes closed before taking a deep breath and opening them. Time to see who was right.

When he opened his eyes he found himself looking into deep blue, it was a colour which captured him, and he knew it wasn't the first time it had happened. Looking into Cas eyes he remembered all the other times he had stood there and stared at the angel as he stared right back. All his supressed feelings and thoughts reflected back to him by the angel, even if he had never understood them, not then. Yeah, his feeling for Cas were real, so very real, and they had always been there under the surface. He had just been to pig-headed to ever see it. Sam was wrong, he loved Cas for who he was, and not because of some stupid fucking deal. Wait, what? Love? When they hell did this become love? Frowning he stared harder at Cas as he tried to pinpoint when his caring had become love, and he found he couldn't, it seemed to him it had always been there, unknown, just as his romantic feelings had been. He could only pinpoint the time he realised it, and that was right now, when Sam had made him consider what could be the truth. So he guessed there was something he should thank his brother for, maybe, when he was done being pissed at the little shit.

"Dean is something wrong?" Castiel asked as all Dean did was stand there staring at him. He wouldn't have minded, but he noticed the frown appear on the other man's face and that was not the look he wanted him to have while they were in the shower together.

"Na my angel. Everything is how it should be." Dean replied wrapping his arms around Cas and pulling him to him so he could say with a kiss what he had only just realised. Yeah, this was exactly how they should be, together. Nothing could change that fact.

Castiel went willing to Dean, returning the kiss which was unlike the others they had shared. This one seemed more… sensual, more caring. It made him melt against the man with him, plastering his wet naked body against Dean's, loving the sensation of the wet skin against this own. He enjoyed it so much he even forgot Dean had once again called him angel. He didn't care, he had Dean, naked and pressed against him under the steady stream of water. Oh yes, this was just as he had imagined.

"Hmm, so what should we do now?" Castiel asked pulling back from Dean then his eyes lit up with an idea. "I think you need to get clean. Isn't that what a shower is for?" He said reaching for the body wash. The idea of running his hands over Dean's body with the excuse of getting him clean, oh yes, that would definitely be fun.

"Oh yeah, but I would prefer we got dirty first." Dean responded grabbing Cas' hand before he got the bottle. This wasn't about him, not this time. This time was to show him what he meant to him, this was all about Cas.

"How so?" Castiel asked tilting his head, making the water start to hit his jaw line and trail down making Dean want nothing more than to follow the drips movements with his tongue. Though he saw Cas also had a twinkle in his eyes which Dean was coming to understand. It was strange, they had been together for such a short time but still Dean felt he knew this man better than anyone else in the world. Of course he was Cas, so… maybe not so strange.

"Shower sex is complicated Cas." Dean replied with a smile. As much as he would love to bend over and allow Cas to have his fill of him against the wall, the body was not quite as willing as the mind right then.

"I'm sure we could find a way." Castiel purred sliding against Dean making the other man catch his breath at the sensual feel of frictionless skin contact.

"Next time, but for now…" with that Dean dropped to his knees and ran his tongue up Castiel's erection before the other man could even think to protest. He wanted to show his angel what he meant to him, how much he felt for him, to show Cas that he loved him. It was then, when he was about to take Cas' cock into his mouth that words he had once spoken to the angel while was insane raised in his mind. _"I'd rather have you, cursed or not."_ Oh man, he hadn't known then how true those words were then, but he did now. He wanted Cas, in any way he could have him. Because he loved the damn guy, and he was okay with that. He was okay with loving this man. That though made his smile as he wrapped his lips around Cas, and made his hand move to hold his hips still. It was time to show Cas just what he knew about pleasurable torture, and he reckoned his lover would most definitely appreciate it, in the end at least.

Castiel stood there, understanding a second after Dean dropped to his knees what was about to happen, and he certainly wasn't complaining. He had enjoyed it very much the last time Dean did this to him, and he was very happy to do it again. But when he felt the need to push into Dean he found his movement restricted by the man's hands. He frowned down at him then, only to be greeted by green eyes and a smirk as Dean continued to play with his erection. He narrowed his eyes, making Dean chuckle up at him and pull away from his cock.

"You got ya smitey face Cas. Trust me, you'll love it." Dean said before returning to what he had been doing, mainly teasing Cas in every way he could think of, to make it so when he came it was a seriously powerful explosion of joy and pleasure.

Castiel frowned at Dean's words, but that expression soon let him as he found himself experiencing things he had never before. Dean managed to take him to the brink of orgasm and then pull him back before building up to a higher point. It was… there were no words in Cas' mind to describe his feelings, just pleasure and painful joy and moaning Dean's name over and over again. His world had coalesce into only Dean's mouth and tongue, and it was, to steal Dean's word, awesome.

Of course once Dean finally let Cas come and experience that pleasure, the former angel would not let that be the end of it. Relationships were all about give and take. As such when Dean stood Castiel grabbed the body wash as he had initially intended and proceeded to wash Dean clean, taking great care of making sure his erection was spotless, as well as fulfilled as it were. Dean didn't stop him, he just leant against the wall with his eyes closed enjoying the attention Cas was giving his body, enjoying the feel of the man he loved's hands on him and his lips and tongue exploring his chest. Yeah this was real, and this was perfect. This was him and Cas, how they should be. He just hoped the angel never found out about what he had done to start this relationship, because he had a horrible feeling that Cas wouldn't accept the 'the how is not important' excuse any more than his brother did. Ah screw that. He was happy, Cas was happy, it was all good.

That was all that mattered to Dean. They were happy, and he was in love, he couldn't ask for more, and he certainly didn't want any less.


	32. Chapter 32

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, Raheem and giawinchester** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Sam didn't know where he was going, he just needed to get as far away from the bunker as he could. It was with that in mind that he had climbed into the first car he found in the garage, and if said car also happened to be his brother's impala, it was of no importance. Sam hadn't taken it in a petty attempt to piss Dean off at all, he just needed a ride.

He drove it hell for leather down the back roads, turning whenever he could to keep his mind away from the conversation he had had with Dean. Not that it worked, he could still hear the words going round in his head, how Dean had agreed to make Cas love him in return for his life. How Dean claimed he cared for Cas, how Sam had always thought that he did. But if that was so, why make the fucking deal that could hurt the guy so freaking much? He didn't understand his brother some times. Surely he knew that when Cas found out about this, and Sam knew he would, there was no way Dean would be able to keep this deal a secret for ever. So when Cas did find out, surely his brother realised how hurt he would be by it. That Dean had traded his emotions without thought. Surely Dean could see how wrong that was, right? But no of course he didn't, because he was Dean fucking Winchester and he was a selfish bastard who couldn't accept being alone. Couldn't just let him die. Oh no, had to save Sammy, no matter what it did to everyone else. As long as he had his fucking Sammy.

At that Sam took a deep breath as he realised he was starting to think about himself in the third person, never a good look. He need to think about this rationally, and decide what he was going to do with the information of Dean's deal. It was then it hit him. It hit him so freaking hard he screeched the car to a halt, leaving skid marks on the road behind him as the car almost swung round with the force of his braking. Oh Dean would kill him if he ever found out he did that. Of course that idea made a smug smile appear on his face. Good, served Dean right. But back to the thought which had caused him to do it in the first place.

Because he had suddenly remembered that a deal was made between two people, or one human and a demon. As such there was another player in this sick game, and that player was Crowley. So what the fucking hell did he get out of getting Cas to fall in love with Dean? What twisted game was the king of hell playing with them this time? He doubted Dean had thought to ask why when he had made the deal, so the only one who could answer his questions was the demon himself. Hmm, looked like it was time for him and Crowley to have some more quantity time together. Oh joy.

Sam found the nearest empty barn and thanked god briefly when he saw his brother keep his car fully stocked for all eventualities, including summoning a demon. Grabbing the things he needed and some red spray paint he made his way inside, making sure to draw a devils trap on both the floor and the ceiling, anything to keep that slimy bastard in place long enough for him to get answers.

Once everything was ready he performed the summoning ritual and settled in to wait for the king of hell to get his ass to him. He didn't care how long it took, he needed answers.

* * *

Crowley was busy when he felt the summoning, but considering it was being done by a Winchester, which he presumed meant Dean, he decided he should probably get it over and done with. Though what squirrel wanted to talk to him about he had no bloody idea. Of course as soon as he arrived in the barn and felt the pull of a devils trap suppressing his powered he sighed. Not Dean then, it seemed moose wanted a word. How lovely.

"Hello darling. What can I do for you today?" Crowley asked smirking up at the man standing in front of him. He may be trapped, but he wasn't scared of Sam Winchester.

"I want you to tell me why you made a deal with Dean." Sam growled at him. He wanted answers and he wanted them now.

"I think that's between me and squirrel don't you?" Crowley responded in a bored voice as he raised his eyebrow.

"Not when it was to save my life." Sam responded determined to get the demon to talk.

"Oh please, Dean saving your life or you his, has become an almost annual event. It's no longer even news worthy." Crowley responded dismissing Sam words.

"Why did you want Dean to get Cas to fall in love with him?" Sam asked more forcefully this time.

"He told you? Well I must say I'm impressed, I didn't see that coming." Crowley replied with surprise. He had assumed Dean would want to keep the details to himself, an idea he was all for. He did not want hell finding out he had saved a Winchester in return for the other one falling in love and being happy. The thought of that ever coming out sent a shiver up his spine.

"Answer me." Sam snapped, he was so done with people giving him the run around, and at least with Crowley he didn't have to worry about the guys feelings. Mainly because he didn't have any.

"I thought you of all people would be able to work that one out moose. I means seriously, how many years have they been supressing there feelings for each other and staring soulfully into each other's eyes?" Crowley replied with a sigh. Surely the why was obvious, after all this was the man who had almost made him human. Had made him have the feelings that still affected him now. Oh if only he could have let the bloody boy die.

"What do you care about that?" Sam asked in confusion. I mean seriously, did Crowley really expect him to believe he had made that deal with Dean so he could pay match maker with his brother and his angel? Because not only was that seriously far-fetched, it was also seriously creepy.

"Oh moose, and here I thought we had created an understanding between us with our last conversation." Crowley replied with a sigh and fake hurt at Sam's words.

"I'll never understand you." Sam responded automatically, but even as he did he remembered Crowley tried to a chair declaring that everyone deserved to be loved. It was not a memory he liked, or wanted to think about thank you very much. It was just so… wrong.

"True enough, I am highly complex. My only defence for making that deal with Dean is that at the time I was somewhat high, thank you very much." Crowley replied with a snide smile at the one who had made him the way he had been, the way he still was. Bloody Winchesters, if only he could kill them, life would be so much easier.

"What does that mean?" Sam asked wanting to know if his suspicions were correct. That Crowley had somehow become somewhat human, even if everything inside him rebelled at the idea.

"I felt everyone deserved to be loved, even your idiot of a brother." Crowley responded with a sigh and a roll of his eyes. There he had said it, what more did the bloody moose want?

"Wait you made the deal to get Cas and Dean together, because you wanted them to be loved?" Sam asked for clarity. He still couldn't believe it. It was more fucked up than anything else he had ever dealt with, and he had been possessed by Lucifer.

"They deserve some happiness." Crowley shrugged in answer. Sam was not getting anything more from him than that.

"But, What? You hate us, and you really hate Cas." Sam exclaimed his mind still refusing to accept what Crowley was saying.

"There's a fine line between love and hate Samuel, now please release me. I have things to do." Crowley stated turning his eyes hard. He was done with this Winchester.

"Why should I?" Sam demanded crossing his arms as he smirked at the demon. He had him trapped and there was nothing Crowley could do about it.

"Because my deal with your brother was not just for Castiel's heart, it was also for my freedom. You keep me much longer and you will be forfeiting that clause. Tell me moose, are you really ready to die?" Crowley smirked back. He loved it when he got one over on the bloody hardy boys. Dean had agreed to his freedom, and neither of them had specified a time limit for it.

At that Sam glared at Crowley but he could see no way out of not doing as the demon asked. Sure he had been ready to die before, but now he had to sort out all the shit Dean had brought down on them and try to make sure that it didn't blow up in their faces. He couldn't really do that if he was dead. As such he moved and scrapped away the paint, breaking the trap.

"Be seeing you moose, oh and tell that brother of yours I'll be waiting for my next progress report."

"Progress report? Was that what Dean was telling? How fucking gross." Sam replied but even as he said the words he knew he was talking to empty air. Crowley was, if nothing else, the kind of person who always wanted to have the final word. Well at least he had some answers, that was enough for now. It was time for him to forget all this shit, time to have some freedom of his own before he returned to the bunker. He was still seriously pissed at Dean for this fucking mess, a night out could be just what he needed to calm down.


	33. Chapter 33

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, giawinchester and Raheem for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean and Cas lay side by side on Dean's bed completely naked and staring up at he ceiling as they air-dried after their shower. They were relaxed and happy in each other's company, and while they weren't strictly touching, Cas' hand was trailing up and down Dean's arm. He had finally returned to the world after the enjoyment they had shared under the water and he remembered why it was Dean had not been in the shower with him from the beginning.

"What did Sam wish to speak to you about?" He asked casually turning to stare at Dean's profile.

"Nothing important, he just wanted to make sure I wasn't gonna hurt you." Dean responded trying to stick as close to the truth as possible. It was true after all, Sam was concerned for Cas after he had told him the truth.

"Why would he think you would hurt me Dean? You could never hurt me." Castiel replied moving so he was propped up on his elbow and he could look down into Dean's beautiful green eyes.

"Yeah well, I don't have the best track record with relationships." Dean replied with a gentle smile, hoping that would appease Cas, hoping he would stop the line of questioning he was on.

At those words Castiel frowned as he lay back down and thought over them. He then proceeded to think over the relationships Dean had had, though in truth the only one he really knew about was with Lisa. And that not working out had not been Dean's fault. Lisa had just not been able to fit herself into Dean's life. But he was already in it, so that should not be a problem. He could see no reason why Dean would hurt him… unless Sam thought his brother would get bored of having sexual relations with a man. Was that the issue? Of course so far in his and Dean's relationship he had been the one to enter the other man, maybe he should suggest Dean enter him? That would be similar to sex with a woman would it not? That would keep Dean at his side, correct? Whatever the reason Castiel felt the need to voice his inner thoughts to the man next to him. To show him that as long as they conversed, surely they would make sure no one got hurt.

"Dean, your other relationships. Those people did not understand your life, but I do. I'm part of it and I want to always be part of it. You are special to me, and I know you would never willing hurt me." He said turning to Dean and moving his hand so that it was stroking the other man's cheek. "I also would be happy to be on the 'bottom' in our sexual encounters whenever you wish." Castiel continued using his trusty finger quotes around the strange shag word.

"Oh Cas." Dean chuckled loving the way Cas looked at him with such innocence, but also without any self-consciousness about discussing sexual positions. Of course the idea of having Cas below him brought an idea into his mind. One that made him move so he was straddling the former angel before lowering his lips and kissing him.

"Cas, if you want to be below me, I'm more than happy to oblige." Dean smirked down at the man he loved who was now under him. Now pressed into his memory foam mattress by Dean's weight.

"Does that mean you are going to enter me?" Castiel asked curious more than anything else. He was perfectly happy to do it this way if Dean wished, even if he did enjoy being the one brining Dean to ecstasy as he moved inside of him.

"Nope, its means I'm gonna be doing all the heavy lifting." Dean replied moving to grab a bottle of lube from his bedside draw. His body was feeling a lot better, and more than ready to try this again.

"I do not understand." Castiel responded with a frown as he saw what Dean had collected. How were he and Dean going to have sexual intercourse this time?

"Just lie back, relax and enjoy. You'll understand soon enough." Dean replied leaning over him to give Cas a quick searing kiss, pulling back before Cas could try to take control. He then proceeded to kiss, lip and suck Cas' body while preparing himself for the man below him. He was gonna show Cas how well he could ride.

Dean knew he didn't have the fineness or care that Cas did when too came to getting his hole ready. But he got it done well enough, and as soon as he felt he could take the man below him's cock he sat up straight, lining himself up so that he could slide down onto Cas while simultaneously sliding his hands up his body to tangle them in his hair, and incidentally finding his arms trapping Cas', making him completely at Dean's mercy. Not that Dean got a kick out of that at all, honest.

* * *

Castiel lay back as Dean had instructed. He tried to stay still and let Dean do as he wished, but he couldn't stop his body responding to the feeling of Dean's mouth on him. And when he saw Dean's hand going to his own ass to prep himself, Castiel couldn't stop the primeval growl that came out of his throat at the arousing sight. Who knew watching the man he cared for getting himself ready for him to enter him would be such a turn on?

Soon, though not soon enough in Castiel's mind, Dean was sliding down him. It was different from the other times he and Dean had done this. Mainly because this time Dean was in charge, Dean was the one who could control the speed, depth and angle at which Castiel's erection entered him. Castiel wasn't completely sure he liked it as much, especially when he discovered Dean had his arms trapped so he couldn't even grab the other man's hips and pull him down hard upon him.

Or though it did have the consolation that he was now nose to nose with Dean, staring into his sparking green eyes.

"how ya doin' Cas?" Dean murmured as he started to kiss Cas' jaw while he gently moved his hips in a rolling motion, causing friction on the whole of the cock inside him.

"I would be doing better if you moved." Castiel responded with a smirk suddenly understanding the times Dean had said similar words to him.

"Someone once told me patience was a virtue Cas." Dean smirked down at the other man as he gently raised himself up before sliding slowing down again. Wow, who knew torturing Cas this way would be so much fun?

"Hmm, that is a sentiment I am starting to think is complete shit." Castiel responded with a growl as he tried to move his hips and therefore Dean, only to find in his current position with his legs flat on the bed he had no leverage.

"Oh I don't know, I'm kinda starting to see its merits." Dean responded moving once more, but just as gently, and just as slowly.

"Dean if you do move I will remember this next time, and I will make you pay." Castiel growled with a glare at the man above him.

Dean looked down at the angel below him and saw his face. It was a strange amalgamation of Cas' angelly face he used to pull when pissed, and a very human one which was begging him to give him what he wanted. It was a face which in his mind defined the guy below him and he couldn't help it. He hadn't meant to, but there was no way he could have stopped the words from slipping out. He was too relaxed, having too much fun to sensor his mouth.

"I love you Cas." he whispered as he stared into the blue eyes which had become his world. God knows when, but they had. Of course as soon as he realised what he had said he felt his own eyes widen. It was as if in slow motion he saw Cas swallow and open his mouth to reply. But Dean couldn't let him. Not here, not now. He didn't want those words returned when they were like this. He hadn't said them to fulfil any shit deals and he would be damned if his unfiltered words did just that.

Moving his hand quickly from Cas' hair he placed it over the former angels mouth, stopping any sounds from emerging.

"No Cas. Don't say it back. Not yet." He said urgently while trying to scramble for a reason he could give Cas to do as he asked which didn't involve him telling the other man that those words from his lips were the whole reason he started this relationship. Even if it meant so much more to him now. He after all knew Cas very well, and he knew he wouldn't just as accept his words. He would want to know why.

Castiel was lying there beneath Dean, enjoying their back and forth conversation, and even enjoying the slow torture the man above him was subjecting him too. But then Dean said words he had never expected to hear from him. Not as a human or as an angel.

"I love you Cas."

It took him a few seconds to process the words, but once he had he felt a surety in his heart that right then all he wanted to do was return the favour. To show Dean that he too was loved, that he had always loved him, even as an angel. Yes okay he didn't understand all the human emotions he had. But the feelings he had had for Dean as an angel he knew. And he was pretty sure that had he ever thought to put a name to them, they would have been love. Maybe not the love he was now venturing into with the man. The romantic kind that consisted of physical connection, but a love all the same. Swallowing he opened his mouth to tell Dean this. Tell Dean he had always, in some way, loved him. But before he could get the words out the other man's hands was over his mouth and he was telling him not to return the sentiment. For a second Castiel was hurt. Thinking that maybe Dean hadn't meant it. But then he remembered he was dealing with Dean Winchester. The only man he knew who felt his life was worth less than everyone else's. The one man who always put others before him. But still, he had to know.

"Why?" He asked once the hand left his mouth. He needed to make sure his suspicions were correct before he could decide on a course of action.

"Cos you can't know that. Not yet." Dean explained even if he internally winced at the words. Was he really gonna use Cas' lack of understanding for emotions as his excuse here? Well yeah he was. He just hoped Cas brought it.

"But you do?" Castiel asked raising an eyebrow at the idea that Dean would know he loved him before he would know the same.

"I understand human feelings Cas. What you're feeling could just be the desire and lust of the start of a love affair, something that dies with time." Dean responded trying to come up with explanations, though as soon as he said the words he felt a stab in his heart at the idea that Cas would bore of him, but it was a possibility he would have to face.

"Do you really believe that Dean?" Castiel asked in astonishment. Did Dean truly think he would ever be able to walk away from him? That he would ever stop feeling for him as he had since he had pulled him from hell?

"No." Dean conceded. In truth he couldn't see that ever happening, he couldn't see Cas ever not being at his side. But… he didn't want to turn this moment into something it shouldn't be. This was about them, and nobody else. Not Sam or Crowley and his fucking deal. Just them. He didn't want to bring that into their bed, not now not ever. "But I do believe you don't yet understand all the emotions you're feeling. I want you to be completely sure before you say anything. I want you to know, as you are now, that you really mean them. Does that make sense?" Dean finished with, hoping he hadn't just ruined everything he had with the man beneath him, the man buried to hilt inside him.

Castiel thought once more over Dean's words and saw the truth. Dean never believed himself deserving of love, it was Castiel job to show him just how wrong he was. He would start now.

"Yes Dean it does. But just because I don't say the words, it wouldn't stop the feelings inside of me." Castiel finally said in reply with a loving smile on his face.

"I don't want it to Cas. I just want you to be real sure." Dean whispered as he lowered his head to give Cas a gentle kiss before deciding they had done enough talking. With that he slid his hands from Cas' face to Cas' hand so he could move them so that their clasped hands rested above their heads as he started to move. Creating a steady pace for them both, pushing his tongue into Cas' mouth as he slid down on his cock and retreating with both.

Castiel lay they for a while enjoying Dean's movements, but he felt the need to move to. The way Dean was now positioned Castiel found he could bend his legs, and in doing so got a solid foundation on the bed below him with his feet, making it possible for him to move his hips in time with Dean, meeting his downward motion with upward trusts. Both of them riding now.

It didn't take long before the speed increased and Dean moved so he would have a better position. Sitting up he shifted his knees forwards and he could rest his hands on Cas' bent legs as he pounded himself against the man below him.

Castiel had to say he liked this new position very much. It gave him a complete view of Dean as he impaled himself upon his erection. He could see how his muscles moved and clenched, and he could see Deans own erection bouncing along with their motion. With a smirk Castiel moved both his hands down to the organ. Dean had tortured him before, time to return the favour. Time to show Dean just how much he cared for him.

When Dean felt both of Cas' hands around his cock his head fell back with pleasure and he couldn't stop the groan or the words that fell from his lips as he moved his body to respond to his own desires.

"Yes Cas, yes. Harder, faster, oh Cas, yes."

It wasn't long before Dean was coming all over Cas' hand and chest and at the feel of Dean's muscles clenching around him Castiel followed suit. Both experiencing the pleasure they were coming to associate with only being able to achieve with the other.


	34. Chapter 34

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank spnfankat81, Perdition Raiser, giawinchester and Raheem for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, now I have accelerated the time line slightly mainly because I'm not going to be including any of the episodes from the show in this story. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Kevin had been waiting for the other three men who lived in the bunker to return so he could tell them what he had discovered from the angel tablet. So of course as soon as he had heard them return he had moved towards the kitchen, sure that would be there first port of call. But as he reached it he heard both Sam and Dean's angry voices and as such retreated once more, deciding it would be best to leave it until later. When they weren't having some sort of family spat.

So he sat and waited, but when no one came into the library he got a little bored and decided to try their rooms. He went to Sam's first, but got no response, he therefore then went on the Dean's. He was going to knock, but then he heard, very clearly the words

"Yes Cas, yes. Harder, faster, oh Cas, yes."

In Deans voice and he sensibly decided that now was probably not the best of times. It seemed Dean and Cas had finally got together and he really didn't want to interrupt them mid sex. So he would wait until they came out, or Sam came back. Yes that sounded like the best plan, and until then he could go back to the tablet and make sure what he had translated was in fact correct.

* * *

Sam woke in the back seat of the impala with a groan for the hangover he was feeling. He had drunk far too much last night in an attempt to forget everything, though at least he hadn't pulled the barmaid, then he really would have been turning into Dean. He needed to stop this behaviour, get back to the bunker and see what was happening. See if Kevin had anything since they left, and see how Dean and Cas were together now he had had his eyes completely opened by both his brother and Crowley. Try to decide what he would do next about this situation. Try to decide if he should tell Cas just what his brother had done. He believed he deserved the truth, but… well it was his life on the line. He needed to see just how Dean really felt about the former angel, then maybe he could decide how to proceed.

Walking through the door while stretching his muscles Sam was thinking of nothing more than a good shower and some coffee and breakfast before he went and found Cas and Dean. Of course this was idea interrupted by Kevin intercepting him.

"Sam, you're back good. I've found something."

"What?" Sam asked moving to the kitchen, one out of three would have to do he thought as he put on some coffee, and looking at Kevin he could guess that they both needed it.

"Well it maybe something, but come see." Kevin said gesturing to the library, wanting to show Sam what he had translated. But the other man insisted on waiting for the coffee before he moved from where he was. Instead he wondered where the other two occupants of the bunker were, and why they hadn't seen whatever Kevin had. I mean surely Dean wasn't that busy trying to make Cas love him right? After all Sam doubted it would take much effort on his brother's part, one of things that pissed him off so much.

"Have you told Dean and Cas?" He asked voicing some of his thoughts as he finally was able to pour the sweet beautiful coffee.

"I was going to, but they seemed to be a bit busy last night." Kevin responded shifting on his legs. He really didn't want to think about what he had heard. There were certain things you did not need to know about your friends, and Dean and Cas' sex life really was one of them.

"Doing what?" Sam asked with an eye roll as he took a sip of his coffee. Typical Dean, not caring about the big picture.

"Umm, having sex." Kevin replied making Sam spit out the coffee he had just drunk. Dean and Cas were having fucking sex? What the hell?

"Excuse me? They were having sex?" He asked when he manged to stop coughing and turn to Kevin with wide eyes of disbelief.

"From what I heard yeah. You know I never saw Dean as the bottom-" Kevin decided to expand. Now he was thinking about it, that wasn't something he had ever envisioned. The guy gave off such a masculine vibe.

"What?!" Sam squawked having to reach for the counter at the idea that not only was Dean having sex with a guy, he was letting him be the guy. Even if it was Cas, that wasn't Dean. Dean wouldn't willing allow Cas to fuck him, right? Not even for his life, right?

"The bottom. You know, the one taking it?" Kevin explained thinking that maybe Sam hadn't understood what he had meant.

"I know what bottom means but why would you think Dean was one? Wait no, I don't want to know. I want to know anything about my brother's sex life thank you." Sam replied suddenly realising what he was asking and getting a picture in his mind to show him exactly what he was asking. He really didn't want to know. So Dean and Cas were fucking, and Dean was taking it, that didn't mean anything right? Or maybe it did. Maybe it meant Dean did actually care for the guy, I mean if he was bottoming it then he was submitting to Cas. He was giving Cas the power, and that was something he knew Dean wouldn't do with just anyone. Maybe Crowley was right? Wait, was he really analysing his brothers sex life and thinking his deal was okay? No what Dean had done was not okay no matter what. What the hell had happened to him to make him do this? Damn it Dean. This whole fucking thing was making Sam think of things he really didn't want to even know about.

"Okay, but when I heard him begging for Cas to go harder and faster, I got the message." Kevin finished with a smirk at the look of horror on Sam's face. He had been waiting to tell someone about his translation long enough. It was time he made someone, i.e. Sam, share the discomfort he felt in that wait. Plus he found it entertaining.

"That was something I did not need, nor want to know." Sam replied with a glare at the young prophet before standing and gesturing to the library, time to turn the conversation to something more appropriate.

"Join the club." Kevin muttered as he followed Sam's direction and made his way to the place he had been working the previous night.

"What have you found?" Sam asked taking the book Kevin handed him, not that it made any more sense to him than the tablet itself did.

"Well I've translated the angel tablet, but I couldn't do it into English, I think it's some sort of dead language." Kevin replied. He had spent the evening trying to find something to translate the symbols he had written but he had come up empty. He would need help to do this final part.

"Where the hell are we going to find someone who reads a dead language?" Sam asked looking from the paper to the boy in front of him with confusion. This wasn't any help, was it?

"Umm, maybe the former angel in Dean's room would be some help." Kevin suggested making Sam's eyes widen. He should have seen that, he was just too caught up in what Dean had done to save his life to think properly, that or he had drank far too much the previous night. No wonder Dean never had any ideas if this was how he permanently felt.

"Right then." Sam responded putting down the book and turning towards the room. Time to wake up the loves birds, or whatever it was they were. He didn't care. They needed their help so Dean could get his head out of Cas' ass, or vice versa according to Kevin, oh god did he really just think that? Whatever Dean and Cas could both help them. He was so done with the shit of deals and all that crap. Now they needed to see if they could get the angels back to heaven.

"Are you sure you want to- never mind, but don't blame me if you walk in on something." Kevin said to Sam's retreating back. He wasn't completely sure what was going on, but he had heard enough the previous day to put a few pieces together. The damn Winchesters were screwed and dealing with far more than they could all at once, though he was coming to believe that was pretty much the norm around here. Oh well, he had done his part, the rest was up to the others. They could deal with it all, he was washing his hands of them. With that Kevin returned to the kitchen and got himself a coffee before settling back down in the library to await whoever it was who returned.


	35. Chapter 35

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, giawinchester and Raheem** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Sam stood outside Dean's door and stopped, listening for a second to make sure he wouldn't be interrupting… anything. When he heard no sounds from the other side he threw the door open, screw knocking.

What he saw made him stop short and grab the door so it wouldn't bang against the wall. Because there lying in Dean's bed where Cas and Dean, completely naked. Or at least he presumed they were naked, though thankfully he could only see their top half's. Cas was lying on his back, and wrapped around him like he never wanted to let go was his brother. He saw how Dean's head was lying on Cas' chest, right over his heart, and Sam could see the top of an anti-possession tattoo peeking out from above his hair. When had Cas had that done? He hadn't even thought about the former angel needed one of those, but it seemed Dean had. Of course Dean had, that was what he did. Looked out for everyone else.

He returned his eyes to his brother who had such a peaceful look on his face as he slept. Sam tried to think of the last time he had seen Dean look like that, and surprising found he couldn't remember it. Couldn't remember a time when his brother was as relaxed as he seemed to be in his former angels arms. It was looking at Dean, looking at the sight of Dean asleep with Cas that made Sam finally understand. His brother really did care for Cas. He really did love the guy, but he also knew he would never have taken this step, to let himself have this, not without a serious push. A push like a deal with the king of hell. He might not approve of it, but he knew in that second there was no way he could tell Cas what Dean had done. He wouldn't be the one to remove that look from his brother's face, not now, not ever.

"Sam?" Came a sleepy voice, though it wasn't the one he had expected to hear. Turning from looking at his sleeping brother his eyes met the blinking awake blue of Cas'.

"Hey Cas." Sam replied softly not wanting to wake Dean. He didn't want to ruin that happy look.

"Do you need us for something?" Castiel asked waking up fully and wondering why Sam hadn't knocked. Had something happened? The idea caused him to tense and hold dean tighter to him, as if trying to protect him from whatever evil was coming.

"Kevin thinks he's got something on the angel tablet." Sam replied with a smile trying to make sure Cas knew this was good news and not something bad. Though he did appreciate the way that Cas' instinct seemed to be to protect his brother, but then it always had been hadn't it?

"Then I will join you." Castiel responded moving as if to pull himself away from the man wrapped around him. If this was about the angels then he needed to know. He may be human now, but the fact was that his brothers and sisters were on earth because of him, and he needed to do all he could to help them return to heaven.

"Na Cas, take your time. Have a shower and wake Dean. I'll go get breakfast started." Sam replied thankfully stilling Cas with his words, he really didn't need to see the guy naked thank you very much.

With a smile and nod for the couple Sam turned around and closed the door behind him, leaving them in peace.

* * *

"Very well." Castiel said to Sam's retreating back. He waited until the door was firmly closed and he had heard Sam walk away before he spoke again.

"Why did you pretend to still be asleep Dean?" He asked gently turning to look at the man lying around him.

"I don't wanna get up?" Dean replied opening his green eyes and smiling up at the man he loved. Though the truth was he hadn't wanted to talk to Sam, not like this, not after all that had been said the last time. He also wanted to see what his brother would say to his angel when he thought he couldn't hear. He wanted to know if he would take the first opportunity he had to tell him what he had done.

"But we must Dean." Castiel responded smiling down into those beautiful green eyes as he found his hand unconsciously stroking through Dean's hair.

"Really? Can't we just lie here? I'm sure we can think of some things to do to entertain ourselves." Dean replied pressing his body against Cas' in the hopes it would keep the man in his bed a little longer. He didn't want to go out there, to have to deal with the real world and all the shit problems that they had in it.

"No Dean. I must find out what Kevin has discovered. I need to return the angels to heaven." Castiel responded with a sad smile at what he was turning down. He truly loved being with Dean, having sexual intercourse with him made them seem that much closer, but he had to clean up his mistake first.

"We need to Cas, we." Dean replied softly moving so he was lying on his side next to Cas, their heads now level.

"This is my fault Dean, this is something I need to fix." Castiel said giving Dean a remorseful smile. This was his problem, his troubles to solve.

"That's not how it works you know. We work together to fix it. There is no you or me, not anymore, we are a we." Dean responded stroking his hand through Cas' hair hoping he understood what he was saying. Understood what he meant by them now being a we. That he wanted them always to be a we.

"Is that so?" Castiel asked with a raised of his eyebrow, though his eyes shone at the idea Dean had just presented. The thought of him and Dean being a single unit caused a warmth in his heart that he was pretty sure was love.

"Yeah, at least that's how I see it. If you want." Dean replied looking self-conscious all of a sudden, as if he wasn't sure if Cas would want that with him. Wouldn't want to put himself with him in that way.

"Yes. I like that. We will fix it. Of course that means we need to get up." Castiel responded reassuring Dean that this was definitely what he wanted. Yes we, it was the best word in the world to him right then. We.

"Casss." Dean whined at the other man's words falling on his back and trying really hard to give him puppy dog eyes. He really wanted to put off having Sam and Cas in the same room while he was awake for as long as possible, wanted to keep this happiness for as long as he could.

"Deannn." Castiel replied in exactly the same tone of voice making Dean chuckle and pull himself up onto his elbow so he could spear his fingers through the former angels hair, making it even more messy as he pushed him back onto his back.

He had meant to say something, or do something to persuade Cas to stay with him a little longer, but as he stared down into those deep blue eyes, eyes that had seen so much, and yet still held innocence. Dean forgot it all and just stared as what he had. Stared at the man, the being, who had given himself to him, at the one who held his heart. The one person other than his brother who had the ability to destroy him utterly if he so choose, an ability he had handed to him without any real thought of the consequences.

"What is it Dean?" Castiel asked with a frown when Dean didn't move, just stared at him with a look he didn't understand on his face.

"I can't believe how lucky I am to have you in my life Cas. How lucky I was that it was you who pulled me from hell rather than one of the other winged dicks." Dean said in an awed whisper as he took in the blue eyes and the beautiful face of the man he loved. The man who he knew would never hurt him.

"Well if I hadn't been the one to do it, it would have most likely have been Balthazar." Castiel replied with a slight smirk and a twinkle in his eyes at the idea of Balthazar and Dean having to stop the apocalypse together.

"Oh god, I would have killed him within a week." Dean replied leaning his forehead down so it was touching Cas', as he smiled ruefully at the smirk. Trust Cas to bring that douchebag into the conversation they were having in their bed.

"I think it more likely that he would have tossed you back in hell." Castiel commented with a chuckle, finding the idea of Dean and Balthazar having to put up with each other rather amusing. He did not mention that the other option would have no doubt been many orgies, that was not something he would like to imagine, Dean was his.

"Well that's cheery thought." Dean responded sarcastically moving so he was on top of Cas as he spoke, thinking he really would prefer to remove the thought of Balthazar, or anyone else from both their minds right now. And he had some excellent ideas on how to do it too.

"I am lucky that I was the one to pull you out too Dean." Castiel said in sudden seriousness bringing his hands up to frame Dean's face above him, wanting him to know how much he cherished that he got this chance, that he was the one who had first touched Dean's soul.

"I don't know how you can think that, not after all that's happened-" Dean responded with a shake of his head at the sincerity in Cas' eyes. I mean it was ultimately because of him that Cas had lost his grace, that he was now human, and having to deal with all the shit that came with that.

At his words Castiel narrowed his eyes before hooking his legs around Dean and reversing there positions without any effort. Making it so Dean was the one under him and he was the one holding his head making him look into his eyes as he spoke.

"Dean. You are the only person to ever touch my heart, you are the only one who could show me that there was more to life than following orders. You are the reason I am who I am now. And I wouldn't change any of it. Everything I have done, I have done for you, and I would gladly do it all again to help you. You are my reason for being Dean." He said in a forceful tone, hoping to get through to the man below him just how much he had changed him for the better. To tell him how much he had done for him that he would never be able to repay.

"Cas I-" Dean started to say in disbelief. I mean he had been nothing but a curse to Cas, he had ruined his life in a few simple years. How could that be anything good?

"No Dean. You stopped me saying the words last evening because you do not think I know the truth of them. I won't say them now in respect of that. But what I do know is that as an angel you were everything to me Dean, my teacher and my friend. My conscience and my strength. My every decision and thought was based on you, on what I believed you would have done." Castiel interrupted trying to find the right words to explain all Dean had done for him. All Dean meant to him, then and now.

"But its caused you so much pain Cas." Dean responded with sadness. There was no way his influence on Cas was a good thing.

"Nothing comes for free Dean, even if we wish it to be so. I would not be without you in my life." Castiel replied more gently this time as he stroked Dean's hair. He could not imagine a life without Dean, and he would not want to. He was everything Castiel wanted, and needed. He was his world, and had been for a long time.

"Neither would I Cas. You've done so much for me, for Sam. I love you, I really do." Dean replied softly seeing the truth of Cas' feelings in his eyes. He really did mean that much to the guy, this wasn't fake, this wasn't something that had been created due to sexual attraction. This was real, for the both of them.

"I know." Castiel responded just as softly before he closed the distance between them and sealed his lips upon Dean's, hoping to say with that kiss what Dean was not yet ready to hear. That he loved him too. That he would do anything for the man below him, and he would never leave him by choice.


	36. Chapter 36

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Janeen5t, Raheem, Perdition Raiser and giawinchester** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean had finally allowed Cas out of their bed, a little later than the former angel had wanted, but not as late as Dean had wished, and when Cas had insisted he have his shower alone Dean had conceded. It would probably be best to talk to Sam without Cas around first. To see how the land lay with his brother. Taking a deep breath and fastening his robe Dean pushed back his shoulders as he strode into the kitchen.

"There's coffee in the pot, and I'm making bacon and eggs for breakfast, all right?" Sam said when he saw his brother walk purposefully through the door. He couldn't help but smirk when Dean checked at his words. So Dean had not expected him to be friendly, well, he could understand that. They hadn't exactly left it on the best of terms. It was time to sort this out once and for all. Then it would be done, and Sam would no longer have to worry about that. He had a feeling they would have so much more to worry about soon anyway.

"Sounds good." Dean replied cautiously as he moved and poured himself some coffee, not letting his eyes leave his brother as he did so. He was waiting for the other shoe to drop, cos Sammy acting as if nothing happened was never a good thing.

"I spoke to Crowley." Sam said turning round from where he was cooking so he could see his brother's reaction to his words.

"And?" Dean asked in a guarded tone, still waiting for the explosion.

"He explained why he did it, made the deal. He's fucked up, you know that right?" Sam said casually loving how Dean looked like he was tensing for a fight. Served him right for making the deal in the first place, stupid freaking idiot that he was.

"Well yeah, he's the king of hell." Dean responded with a chuckle starting to relax slightly. Sammy didn't seemed to be pissed at him, he wasn't even giving him one of his bitchfaces, surely that meant that it was okay right? Or was he just lulling him into a false sense of security and waiting until he had relaxed before he pounced.

"He's more fucked up that normal." Sam responded with a shudder as he remembered the conversation he had had with the demon. He was not going to even think about the idea of progress reports, let alone give Dean that message.

"Is that even possible?" Dean asked relaxing even more. He was pretty sure Sam was actually okay with what he had done now. He had no idea what Crowley had said, but he had a feeling he owed the guy, not that he would ever say that out loud, to anyone.

"Apparently so, but that doesn't matter. Look I'm not going to tell Cas, I'll leave that up to you." Sam said deciding he had tortured Dean enough. He just wanted them to be back to how they were. Back to being brothers.

"That ain't never gonna happen." Dean spluttered as he took a drink of coffee. There was no way he would ever tell Cas that he made a deal to get him to fall in love with him. The guy would leave without a backwards glance if he ever found out. He would hate Dean for what he had done. So no, Cas was never gonna find out if he could help it.

"You have to tell him Dean." Sam exclaimed, surely his brother realised there was no way he could keep this a secret from Cas for the rest of the lives. Things like this didn't stay hidden forever, they always came out and bit them in the ass. Dean needed to get out in front of it and explain it now. Save the pain that would come if Cas ever found out from someone else.

"Why?" Dean asked glaring at him. He didn't see any way that telling Cas would be beneficial to them. They were happy and they were together, did it really matter how they got there? It just mattered that they did. He loved the guy, surely that was the most important thing, right?

"Because a relationship built on a lie won't work. Believe me." Sam responded with a sigh as he remembered the ones he had had. Remembered how keeping his secrets had got Jess killed, and how he had given up who he was when he was with Amelia.

"None of it's a lie Sam. I love him and I'm planning on spending the rest of my life with him. That's the only important things in our relationship." Dean argued. He was right about this, and nothing Sammy could say would change his mind.

"You love him hu?" Sam asked his eyebrow raising at hearing that word from Dean's lips. It wasn't one Dean ever used lightly, if he used it at all.

"Yeah I do." Dean nodded in reply staring his brother in the eye waiting for him to dispute his claim, to tell him it was all bullshit, that he didn't know what love was.

"You told him that?" Sam asked instead, wondering just how close Dean had got to Cas. How much he had let the guy into his heart.

"Not that it's any of your business, but yeah, last night." Dean responded feeling his cheeks heat slightly at this chick-flick crap.

"And does he love you back?" Sam smirked enjoying how uncomfortable Dean was with this conversation. Loving the colour it had brought to his cheeks. Oh yeah, this would be material to use against his brother for years to come.

"He's been human for what, a week? Come on Sammy, he doesn't know what love is." Dean replied defensively. Cas couldn't know if he loved him yet, it wasn't possible.

"I'm sure he knew love as an angel." Sam argued right back. He was in no doubt of Cas' feelings for his brother. From what he had seen the angel had loved him for years.

"That's different. Human emotions are so much more intense, he needs to work them out before I'll let him even consider how he feels about me." Dean explained what he thought was a very sensible way of looking at the situation Cas was in.

"My god Dean." Sam responded with a soft smile for his brother. For he understood what Dean did not. It wasn't that Cas didn't love him, but more Dean wasn't ready to hear the words, wasn't ready to have someone show him that sort of commitment. He was scared, not that Cas wouldn't love him, but that he couldn't love him. Because deep down Dean still did not feel worthy of such an emotion from anyone. He did not believe he deserved to be happy.

"What?" Dean asked confused about why Sammy was looking at him like that.

"Nothing." Sam replied with a shake of his head, the smile still firmly in place as he realised the uphill battle Cas was going to have to persuade Dean he loved him. But if anyone could do it, it would be Cas, that Sam now knew with certainty.

"Hmm, I think you're burning the eggs." Dean responded not sure he really wanted to know what Sam was thinking, but knowing he would prefer it if he didn't stink out the whole bunker.

"Oh shit." Sam snapped as he turned round and pulled the pan off the heat and looked at the congealed mess inside. Now this was the reason he didn't cook, he got distracted and burnt shit.

With that Dean leant back smirking as he drank his coffee and his brother had to throw away the food he was cooking and start again. Yeah this was good, this was how it should be between them, they were back to being brothers. At that Dean breathed a sigh of relief, he hadn't wanted to lose Sam over this. He never wanted to lose Sam over anything.

* * *

Castiel who had been standing in the corridor by the door frowned at the words he had heard. He hadn't meant to eavesdrop, but he had heard Sam say that a relationship built on a lie could not work and he couldn't help himself. He wanted to know what it was that was going on between the brothers. Was this connected to the conversation Dean and Sam had had about Dean hurting him? But what lie did Sam think their relationship was based on? Castiel could not think of one, could not think of any reason that Dean would ever lie to him, expect, as he had thought the previous night that Dean had only been with women. Maybe that was the lie? Maybe Dean had had relationships with men that he did not know of, was that what Sam wanted him to tell him?

Or was this something else? Something connected to what he used to be, something to do with the angels? Was Dean keeping information about them from him? No he wouldn't do that surely, he knew how he felt about the angels being on earth being his fault. Dean would never keep information about them from him, would he? At that Castiel eyes went wide as he realised that actually yes Dean would, if he thought it would hurt Castiel and that there was nothing he could do about it. Then yes he could very well see Dean keeping things from him. Hmm. He did not like the idea of him doing so, though he could understand why he would. But he did not need protecting, surely Dean knew that? Just because he was human, he could still cope with the consequences of his actions. Though then Dean words about human emotions and how he didn't feel he had got a hold on them yet came to mind. It made a sudden kind of sense in his mind, and if that was the case, then he and Dean would need to talk about the man's overly protective instincts. But he would soon find out exactly what all the angels had been up to. They were close to finding a way to get them back to heaven, Dean could hide nothing from him now.

With a shake of his head at the overprotectiveness of the man he knew he loved he moved so he was in the doorway, time to join the brothers and find out just what Kevin Tran had learnt.

"I don't think I want to eat whatever that is." He said entering the room wrinkling his nose at the smell. His words caused Dean to turn with to him with a beautiful smile upon his lips, he was so captivated by it, he didn't even notice the bitchface Sam sent him.


	37. Chapter 37

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Castielholmeshasthephonebox,** **horsegirl2430, Raheem, Perdition Raiser and giawinchester for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Once everyone in the bunker had had breakfast and coffee the four of them made their way into the library, to the table where Kevin had spread out all he had done and found.

"So what ya got Kev?" Dean asked looking at the jumble of what he guessed was writing, but it was no langue he had ever seen. He thought Kevin had found something? So where was it?

"Well, I've been trying to translate the tablet into English. But then I realised that that was impossible, but I could translate it into this." Kevin explained holding up his notebook for Dean to see the symbols he had written down upon it.

"And what the freakin' hell is that?" Dean asked taking the book and looking down at the symbols which to him looked more like doodles than anything useful.

"It's Elamite cuneiform." Kevin explained pulling a book from the pile and showing it to Dean as if to prove he wasn't lying, not that it meant anything to the other man.

"And that helps us how?" Dean asked with disbelief. This was the big thing Sam had wanted them to see? This was nothing. He and Cas could have definitely spent more time in bed, and the shower, and well, anywhere else he could get the guy in his arms.

"Because I can read it Dean." Castiel said interrupting Dean's thoughts and taking the book of words from his hand.

"Oh right. So what does it say?" Dean asked suddenly doing a turnabout as he belatedly remembered Cas had been an angel, he know doubt knew all the dead languages, as well as the not so dead ones.

"It is hard to translate directly so I will paraphrase." Castiel muttered absently as his eyes moved down the words and he read what it had to say.

"Well paraphrase already Cas." Dean said gently giving him a nudge with his shoulder when the former angel didn't say anything for a while. He needed to know what it said, he needed to be able to help Cas get the angels back to heaven, and he needed to know if he was gonna lose the man he loved in the process. Because if there was any chance of that happening, then this was a no go in Deans mind. He would not lose Cas now he had him, no way.

"To close the gates of heaven and expel the angels upon earth requires the heart of a Nephilim, a cupid's bow, and the grace of an angel who knows love. To undo the spell the angel must give up his existing grace to another angel who is pure at heart. The angel must be willing to sacrifice all he has known to return his family to their home. Be willing to walk the earth in a human form, and stand with those who serve god and his creations." Castiel said laying the book back down on the table as he thought over the words he had just read. The translation he had given the Winchesters and Kevin, and the actual words as he had read them. He had left nothing out from his paraphrasing, but the tone and inflection of the words he had read had most definitely been lost in translation.

"What the hell does that mean?" Dean asked around the room after silence followed Cas' words. Cos to him it sounded like Cas needed to become human, but he already was, so how could he become human again?

"It means that not all my grace was used in Metatron's spell. It is still out there, and we need to find it." Castiel replied with a small smile to the man next to him.

"Well crap." Dean replied wondering just what this meant to Cas. To find out that there was a way he could become an angel again, and then know he would have to give it up. It was a whole different ball game to having it forcibly taken from him. Could Cas give it away? Did Cas want to give it away? Did he want to be human if there was a chance he could be an angel again? There were far too many questions in his head right then. But first things first. They needed to find Cas' grace and that was not going to be easy, no doubt Meta-douche had hidden away somewhere. How the hell were they gonna get that dick to tell them where?

"So we need to find an angel who is pure at heart?" Sam asked thinking over the words Cas had spoken, choosing to voice the one that he hoped would be the easiest for them to come by.

"I'm thinkin' finding Cas' grace is the first thing to do Sam." Dean replied with a glare at his brother. There was no way he would be letting Cas near any angels until he knew he could defend himself against the evil shits. He did not trust them to try and kill him again. And there was no way Dean was putting Cas in that sort of danger.

"But an angel could maybe help us locate it." Sam argued, turning to Cas hoping he would confirm his words and take his side in this. But all he found was that the former angel was staring down at the words in the note book with a frown on his face.

"An angel… or maybe a demon?" Dean suggested an idea coming into his mind. Yeah okay it might not be the best one he had ever had, but it was certainly better than calling an angel. At least he knew Crowley wouldn't try and kill any of them, which is more than he could say for the god squad.

"No Dean." Sam stated crossing his arms as he glared at his brother. He knew exactly what demon Dean was thinking of, and he knew that Crowley wouldn't do this without getting something out of it for himself. Dean had made enough deals with the king of hell, he was not going to let his brother make another, not now, not ever.

"He could help." Dean argued back returning the glare, both forgetting the other two people in the room with them.

"He who?" Castiel asked bringing his head up and turning to look at Dean just as the man turned to him. Looking into the green eyes he had learnt to read so well he saw a quick look of guilt before it disappeared and became softly apologetic, as if Castiel was not going to like Dean's answer.

"Crowley." Dean said gently waiting for the expected look of disappointment in the blue eyes he loved so much. But instead all he saw was curiosity.

"I thought he was dead, did not the trials kill him?" Castiel asked turning to Sam. He would have thought if Crowley was still alive one of the Winchester brothers would have told him.

"No, he survived." Sam replied through gritted teeth still glaring at Dean for all he was worth. He couldn't believe he was even considering getting information from that dick.

"Wait, Crowley is alive?" Kevin interrupted in fury at the knowledge that the thing who had killed his girlfriend and his mother was still alive and walking around as if nothing had happened.

"Yeah he is. Look Kev, I'm sorry-" Dean started to say, trying to think of a way he could explain to the kid why he had let the demon go. But before he could even try to come up with the words Castiel interrupted him.

"Why would he help us in this?" Castiel asked, he did not want to hear Dean apologise for something he had no control over. No doubt he had been more concerned with getting Sam to the hospital than dealing with the king of hell. Right now he wanted to understand Dean's thinking, to work out why he felt that he would help them.

"Cos I doubt he wants the winged-dicks on earth any more than we do." Dean answered with a shrug, not meeting Castiel eyes making him narrow them at the man he had come to care so much about. What was Dean not telling him? Was this the lie Sam was talking about? Was it something to do with Crowley? But this was not the time or place to ask those questions. That was something he and Dean would need to discuss in private. Right now they needed to decide if they were going to ask Crowley or call an angel for the help they required.

"Do you know of any angel that would be able to help us instead of asking Crowley?" Sam asked Cas, still sure that that was the best course of action here. Leave Crowley alone, they could do this without him.

"There is one, but whether he survived the fall or not I do not know." Castiel replied after a minute of thinking. So many of the angel he knew and trusted were gone now, and from those that were left he was not sure they would willing help him in this. Not sure he could trust them not to kill him on sight.

"Well why don't we try and call him, and if that doesn't work we can come back to the idea of asking Crowley." Sam suggested thinking that that would sort it out. They would have no need of the demon with an angel on their side, right?

"I can do that." Castiel responded with a nod at Sam's suggestion. It made the most sense to him, and it kept Crowley out of it.

"You really think this guy can be trusted Cas? Cos if not…" Dean said trailing off as the man he loved turned to him with a look in his eyes that told him to be quiet. That Cas was doing this whether he wanted him to or not, he could come with him and be at his side, or he could stay home. There was no way he was stopping him. "Fine, but if this guy is a no show, we summon Crowley." Dean conceded, there was no way he would let Cas do this without him.

"Very well." Castiel agreed. They would need someone with supernatural powers to be able to track what remained of his grace. He would prefer it be one of his brothers, but if it had to be Crowley then so be it. He needed his grace so he could open the gates of heaven, fix what he had broken and allow his family to return to their home.


	38. Chapter 38

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, giawinchester and Raheem for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, its a long one. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

It was decided that Castiel, Dean and Sam would go and call the angel. Dean said he knew a place, an out of the way disused barn which they could lay a ring of holy oil down in without question, and without causing a major fire if they had to light it. Castiel thought it was strange that Dean would know this, but then he assumed that Dean had scouted out the places around the bunker when they had first moved in. No doubt he had found it then.

And so the three of them made their way to the place Dean had last been to summon Crowley to see how Cas being human changed his deal. Damn that seemed like a life time ago, though in truth it was only days. How had so much happened since then? How had he fallen in love with Cas in such a short amount of time? Or was it really a short amount of time? Especially considering he kinda got the impression he had loved the angel for a lot longer than he had allowed himself to admit. But that didn't matter. What did was making sure this angel didn't hurt Cas.

Once there Dean laid out the ring, making sure it was complete, and brought out his angel blade before he allowed Cas to try and contact his brother, but he knew he couldn't put if off forever.

"Okay Cas. Do your thing." He muttered, making sure everyone was armed and ready for anything. He did not like this plan at all, but he would be ready if it went sideways, just as he was pretty sure it would.

Castiel nodded before closing his eyes and concentrating on the angel radio he could still hear in his head. Finding he had it in his mind he started to speak.

"Ezekiel, if you can hear me brother it is Castiel. I require your help. We have found a way to open heaven, but I cannot do it alone. Please if you can hear me we are in an abandoned barn on the outskirts of Lebanon, Kansas. Please come to us and help. Thank you brother." With his prayer finished Castiel opened his eyes and turned towards the door.

"Now what?" Dean asked after a minute had pasted. He was impatient to get on with this. To see if this guy really would help them out.

"Now we wait." Castiel responded with a smile at Dean. He knew it would take a while for his brother to get to him. The angels had no wings now after all.

With that he settled himself into a crossed-legged sitting position prepared to wait for however long it took for Ezekiel to get to him.

Dean watched Cas sit down as casual as you like and felt like screaming. If they called Crowley he would be hear by now… but he needed to do this the way Cas wished. This was Cas' mission, Cas' problem to fix. He was here as moral support and to protect the one he loved. With that thought he moved so he could sit beside Cas, looking towards the door and making sure he was between the former angel and it. At least now he had time to ask the questions which had plagued him earlier when they had discussed Cas becoming what he once was.

"So Cas, you're gonna get your grace back." He said gently, hoping his words wouldn't carry to his brother who was still standing on the other side of the room.

"Yes, temporarily." Castiel replied smiling at Dean wondering if he wanted him to stay an angel. Wondering if Dean saw this as a way of getting him back to full power as it were, if Dean would prefer him that way.

"You sure you can give that back up? I mean it wasn't like it was your choice to be human." Dean said shifting uncomfortably at how much he wanted to sit there and beg Cas to not do this. To stay with him and stay as he was now. To not let anything change.

"I have accepted my humanity Dean, I am willing to continue as I am." Castiel replied simply, smiling at Dean as he saw the insecurities in his eyes.

"But you gonna be happy like this forever?" Dean asked not understanding how anyone could give up everything Cas had had for a crappy human life and actually enjoy it.

"Do you want me to be an angel Dean?" Castiel asked tilting his head at the man next to him. It was a question he would need an answer to before he proceeded in his plan. Because if Dean wished it, he would be an angel for him. He would prefer to be human, be with Dean as they were now, but if the other man did not agree…

"I want whatever you do Cas. If that's what you want then I'm good with that." Dean replied quickly, wanting to reassure Cas that as long as he was happy, then he would be too. Even if he knew that was a complete pile of shit. He wanted Cas as he had him now, human. He didn't want him going away to be with the other angels, he wanted Cas at his side, and he didn't want anything to stop that from happening, screw the deal he had made. He wanted Cas for himself because he just did, period.

"I want to be with you. The best way to do that is being human. I am happy Dean, I have you and I have what we mean to each other. I could ask for nothing more from my life." Castiel responded with a smile. He could see Dean's wishes in his eyes even if the man would never speak them. He was Dean Winchester, he would always put what others wanted before his own needs. It was one of the things Castiel loved most about him. Because yes, he knew this was love, even if Dean would not let him say it. He knew it deep in his soul, in the remainder of his grace that was inside him. He had always loved Dean, from the moment he had gripped him tight and raised him from hell.

"You sure Cas, cos if not I could-" Dean started to say, not sure how he was going to finish that sentence, but wanting to make sure Cas knew he was okay with whatever he wanted.

"I am sure Dean." Castiel interrupted taking Dean's hand in his own and holding it tight, hoping to show how much he meant his words through the connection.

"Okay then." Dean replied with a soft smile as he squeezed Cas' hand back just as tightly. He had to accept that Cas wanted to be human and with him. Even if he couldn't understand why.

With that they both fell silent as they turned to watch the door hand in hand as they waited for the only angel Castiel could think of who would help them to come and do so.

* * *

It was four hours later and Dean was so fed up now. Not only had they forgotten to pack any food, his ass was getting numb from sitting on the floor.

"Okay, there is no way he's coming right?" He said into the silence, it wasn't the first time he had said those words, but it was the first time he allowed his exasperation at this situation show.

Of course the whole time they had been waiting he hadn't let go of Cas' hands once, but still. This was taking the piss in his mind.

"I do believe you are correct Dean. I have heard nothing on angel radio to show he has heard my prayer. It is possible he did not survive the fall." Castiel responded with a sigh and a heavy heart at being responsible for the death of another angel. He had killed so many of his family. So many deaths lay at his feet.

"Right then. On with plan B." Dean replied standing up and pulling Cas with him as he stretched out his muscles. It was strange to think he was relieved that they were now summoning Crowley. How fucked up was that? That he felt relief at summoning the king of freakin' hell? Somewhere his world had got seriously messed up.

"Fine." Sam agreed with a sigh. He had been so sure this would work, but with the angel being a no show, he couldn't really come up with any other reason to say no to Dean. Well except Crowley was a conniving dipshit, but he doubted that argument would work. They all knew that fact after all.

It didn't take long for Dean to get what they needed from the car and set up the summoning ritual. Once done he turned to Cas to get his nod before he lit the candles. Time to see if Crowley could help them.

* * *

Crowley turned up promptly, wondering if it was the moose wanting to talk some more. But what he found was so much more interesting than just boring old Sam Winchester. Because there was Dean, and beside him, protective as always was Castiel. It was strange to see him without his wings, though he could still sense the residue grace inside him, the grace which clung to his now so very human soul. It was fascinating to Crowley.

"Hello boys. Castiel oh my, don't you look different." He purred to the room, noting the devils trap that surrounded him but paying little attention to it. It wasn't like the Winchesters could keep him after all. But he did wonder why they summoned him, all three of them, and just what the former angel knew of his current working relationship with his lover.

"As do you." Castiel replied with a frown as he realised for the first time he could truly see Crowley's face, or the face of the meatsuit he wore, rather than the demon below the skin. It was a strange experience to see through human eyes after eons of seeing as an angel.

"Yes, I imagine I do." Crowley responded with a chuckle before turning to the two Winchesters with an expectant look. "So why have you kids summoned me? Because I doubt it's to catch up, have a nice little chat over a drink." he said giving Dean a meaningful look upon the words catch up, not that he really needed an update, he could see all he needed from just watching Dean and Castiel. They were definitely walking the right path to get where he wanted them to eventually go.

"We need your help." Dean stated plainly, trying to work out how to have this conversation without revealing the deal he had made with this demon. Hmm, maybe he should have thought through summoning Crowley with Cas at his side, but too late now.

"And why would I help you?" Crowley asked raising his eyebrow at Dean and wondering just what was going on.

"If you do not you will not be leaving this barn." Castiel said narrowing his eyes at the demon he had once chosen to work with. That had not gone well, but here they were doing it again. Though at least this time they had some leverage.

"Is that so?" Crowley asked softly turning his eyes from Castiel to Dean and back again. So Castiel was as clueless as always then. Surely Dean had learnt by now that keeping secrets was never a good idea.

"Yeah it is. So I guess you gonna have to help us." Dean replied with bravo, though whether it was real of fake he wasn't quite sure. He had agreed to Crowley's freedom after all, but neither of them had put a time limit on it, and he had a horrible idea that knowing Crowley as he did that meant it was permanent.

"Oh no, you've got me." Crowley responded with sarcasm dripping from his lips as he rolled his eyes at Dean.

"We need you to find the remainder of my grace." Castiel said ignoring Crowley and Dean's words. They were here for one reason and one reason alone.

"Your grace Castiel? There is some left is there?" Crowley asked his eyes lighting at the idea of the power that he could control with that in his hands.

"Don't even think about it." Dean growled at him, clenching his hand around the angel blade. He wanted to kill the bastard so much for the threat he could hear in his voice, but he knew he could do nothing to him. If he did then Sam would die. Son of a bitch.

"Remember who you are talking to squirrel. I will not only think about it, I will do whatever I wish. I am the king of hell." Crowley replied narrowing his eyes at the man. He held so much that was close to Dean's heart in his hands, he could destroy him with just a word. Did he really think he could threaten him?

"Oh yeah? How's Abaddon these days?" Dean asked glaring right back. He couldn't let Crowley get that grace, it was part of Cas, the person he loved. And there was no way he would let Crowley hold it over their heads.

"Oh touché. Rumour has it she is up and about. How are you and Castiel?" Crowley counted with, smirking when he saw Dean did not have an answer to that. Oh yes, he was the one holding all the cards here. He liked it so very much.

"Crowley stop this. I need my grace to open the gates of heaven and return the angels." Castiel said interrupting whatever was going on. He felt that there was a lot more under the surface here than he knew, and it involved Dean and Crowley. But now was not the time for it. He would ask Dean later, try to work out just what he was missing. But right now they needed help so he could return his family to their home.

"Is that so? Well I can't just go out and find it. I need an incentive." Crowley replied with a shrug, though there was a smirk on his face as he wondered just what these three would give him for finding Castiel's grace.

"You are not getting anyone's soul." Castiel responded narrowing his eyes at the demon. He knew how he worked, and he would not let that happen. Not for anything.

"Don't worry Castiel, your boy toy's soul is safe from me, I know you have first dibs on that one. The moose is safe too, for now. No what I want is a simple promise, nothing more." Crowley replied with a wave of his hand. Souls he had plenty of, but a weapon against Abaddon? He was falling short on that front.

"Nothing is ever simple when it comes to you." Castiel responded with a sigh knowing he would give Crowley his promise, as long as he found his grace.

"Oh how you know me so well. I want the promise that one of you will kill Abaddon for me." Crowley stated as if it was an easy thing to accomplish.

"And how are we supposed to do that?" Sam asked not buying it for a second. He and Dean hadn't found a way to get rid of her before, so why did Crowley think they could now?

"There was once an army of knights, but now there is only one, there must be some way." Crowley responded making his eyes go wide as he tried to look innocent, not that he fooled any of the three others there.

"You know the way Crowley, what is it?" Dean asked with exasperation. He was so done with these games. He would give Crowley his word, and he would give Cas his grace. Then everyone would be happy.

"Rumour has it that the archangels killed them with the first blade." Crowley replied conversationally wondering just how much the former angel knew about that weapon, just how much he would allow him to get from the Winchesters.

"Only Cain can control that power, and you and I both know it." Castiel growled as he realised what it was Crowley wanted one of them to do. He didn't care if it was the only way to get his grace. He would not let one of the Winchesters take on the mark of Cain, especially as he knew it would Dean who did it. He would not let that evil touch the man he loved, not ever.

"True enough." Crowley replied with a shrug. It was the only idea he had to kill the bitch, but if Castiel could come up with something better, then he was all ears. After all he would he had gone to some effort to get Castiel and Dean together, he would prefer not to rip them apart again so soon.

"No." Castiel stated simply. His grace was not worth that cost. Nothing was worth that cost.

"Agreed. But the bitch needs to die." Crowley responded with a sigh as he looked at the former angel, giving him a chance to come up with a different solution to his problem.

Castiel was silent for a moment as he thought. While it was true Abaddon would be hard to kill, surely if an angel and the king of hell worked together they would succeed? She couldn't be stronger than the two of them together, could she?

"If you can find my grace then between us I am sure that we can remove her from the world." Castiel replied with a sigh as he realised he was going to spending more time with Crowley than he had wished. Though in truth, any amount of time was more than he wished.

"Now that I can work with. And no doubt if I have you are my side your back-up dancers here will be joining the fight as well. Ah, the four of us working together, this could very well work. And you never know, this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship." Crowley responded his eyes lighting up. Yes together he and Castiel could very well succeed where he alone had so far failed.

"Did you just mis-quote Casablanca?" Sam asked completely bemused by Crowley's words. He had been silence so far in the conversation, mainly because this had nothing to do with him and the whole first blade and Cain conservation had gone straight over his head, he thought it had probably gone over Dean's as well. Plus this was between Crowley, Dean and Cas, he was just there to make sure everyone behaved. But that sentence he couldn't let pass without comment. I mean who knew the demon had a soppy side?

"So what if of I did moose? It's a good movie. But back to the matter in hand, Castiel?" Crowley replied turning to roll his eyes at Sam before going back to the work in hand. Sorting out an agreement between him and the former angel.

"We have a deal." Castiel said with a nod.

"I would watch using that word around me now darling, you are after all human. And with humans I like to seal my deals with a kiss." Crowley replied with a smirk as he let his eyes drift to Castiel's lips and licked his own. He could see out of the corner of his eye that Dean looked very much like he wanted to kill him. How entertaining.

"I am not kissing you Crowley." Castiel stated simply. Nothing on earth could induce him to kiss the demon, especially not when Dean was at his side. Dean was the only one he ever wanted to kiss.

"That is fine. I would prefer not to kiss you either. You'd no doubt taste of squirrel here, and having that taste once in my mouth was more than enough for me." Crowley replied with a smirk at Dean as the man's eyes went wide. Secrets are never a good foundation for a relationship, Dean needed to come clean.

"Crowley, I think it's time you left." Dean said moving forwards to break the devils trap and hoping Crowley would leave before he could say anything else to Castiel, anything else that would mean he could work out just what Dean had done.

"I'm sure you do Dean. I'll call when I have the grace." with that Crowley disappeared leaving a confused Castiel to turn to Dean.

"What was he talking about Dean?" Castiel asked with a frown on his face as he tried to make sense of Crowley's words and his and Dean's behaviour towards each other.

"It's nothing Cas, come on lets go home." Dean replied not looking the former angel in the eyes as he said the words. He knew if he did, then Castiel would be able to see he was lying. He hoped that by the time they got back to the bunker Castiel would have forgotten all about this. Not that he truly believed that would happen, but he could hope.


	39. Chapter 39

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank spnfankat81,** **Perdition Raiser, giawinchester and Janeen5t for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

The drive back to the bunker was conducted in awkward silence. Castiel sat in the back of the car throughout the whole journey staring into the rea-view mirror. He had hoped to catch Dean's eyes, but the other man didn't once look towards him. It hurt and upset him that Dean was being this way. He wanted to know what it was he hadn't wanted to tell him when they were in barn. What it was Crowley had meant by having kissed Dean before. Because Castiel could think of no time in the past that Dean had ever made a deal with the demon. In fact the only demon deal he knew Dean had made was the one which had led to him pulling him from hell. And Crowley had certainly not been the one to organise that. So what did Crowley mean? What was going on? What was he missing? He didn't like this feeling of being kept in the dark, and he could think of no reason Dean would do so. So why?

Dean on the other hand was trying to think of what he could say to Cas when they got back home. Because he knew he would have to say something, but he couldn't tell him the truth, right? I mean they were on the verge of Cas getting his grace back, if he knew what Dean had done then there was no way he would stay with him. No way, he would ever be able to trust him again. Oh god, what was he gonna do? Dean even seriously considered the idea of just not stopping, carrying on driving, putting off what was to come for as long as possible. But he knew he couldn't do that. He just wished… oh man he wished for so much. None of it likely to happen, that much he knew. Cos life wasn't that nice. It gave you good times then ripped them away with a laugh. He should have known that his happiness wouldn't last. Though he had hoped for more time than he had got. He would just have to find a way to keep Cas at his side. Get him to give him another chance somehow. Cos this wasn't just about them, this was Sammy's life in the balance as well. Damn Crowley and his big friggin' mouth. If he could, he would happily kill the smug bastard. But he couldn't, he was just gonna have to find a way to deal with this himself, some way.

While Sam, sitting in the passenger seat, wanted nothing more than to jump out of the car, but he couldn't really do that while it was in motion. Of course as soon as Dean pulled into the garage he was out and off with a mumble of something which held the words Kevin and research. Anything to get anyway from the awkward tension between the other two. He had told Dean it would all come out in the end, and he would much prefer not to be witness to Dean and Cas' fight about what his brother had done. He would be there to help with the clean up later, maybe. But for now, he would leave it up to Dean to tell Cas what he had done.

Turning off the engine and not even watching his brother's retreating back, Dean took a deep breath and turned to look in the rear-view mirror where his eyes collided with Cas'. In the depths of the blues eyes he loved so much he could see hurt and confusion and he wanted to beat himself up for putting that look there. That or drink himself into unconsciousness, which was probably what he would be doing once he and Cas had had the conversation he knew was coming.

"Let's go to our room." Dean said trying to sound normal, though his voice sounded strained even to him and he knew Cas would pick up on it.

"You mean your room Dean." Castiel clarified. It wasn't their room, even if he did sleep in it with the other man. It was still Dean's space, not his.

"Yeah." Dean sighed in reply, running his hand over his face. That was not a good sign, if Cas was calling it his room, then he was in deep shit with the angel.

Castiel sighed in response but he climbed out of the car and waited for Dean to join him before making his way to the sleeping quarters of the bunker. It was a good idea to have this conversation there, it gave them privacy, and Castiel knew no one would interrupt them there.

* * *

Walking through the door Castiel looked around the room before he heard it close and turned to look Dean in the eye for the first time since Crowley had spoken of having kissed other man. Oh how he hated the idea of Crowley having kissed his Dean.

"What did Crowley mean Dean?" he asked when Dean said nothing just stood there staring at him.

With another sigh Dean moved so he was sitting on the bed. That way he could stare at the wall, only watching Cas' out of the corner of his eyes to gauge his reaction to his words. It was time for him to tell the truth, and hope to god that it worked out somehow. He was done lying to Cas.

"When Sam stopped the trials he was in a bad way. I dragged him out of the church and we watched the angels fall. I was terrified you were among them, but I had to look after Sammy first. Putting him in the car I went back and got Crowley. He was a mess, Sam had been so close to the end he was practically human. Anyway I shoved him in the trunk and made my way to the hospital. When I got there the doctors said there was nothing they could do. They couldn't save Sam's life, he was gonna die. I prayed to you, hoping you would come and fix him-"

"But I couldn't." Castiel interrupted with a heavy heart. He was on earth human by that point.

"No. I was gonna pray to every angel out there, but then I remembered the junk in my trunk." Dean continued with inflection in his tone. He just needed to get the words out, he would deal with the consequences when he was done talking.

"You made a deal to save Sam's life." Castiel stated. There was no question in his words, he knew Dean, and he knew that he would do anything he could to save his brother.

"Yeah, I did." dean swallowed in reply. He was dreading the next bit of this conversation. Because the worst was still very much to come.

"What did Crowley want? Because I know you did not sell him your soul." Castiel asked staring at dean, hoping he would look at him. Hoping he would let him see the green he had loved for so long, even if this was hard for him to say.

"His freedom." Dean responded, but he said no more. He was trying to build up the courage to tell Cas just what Crowley had really wanted from him, from them.

"And? I know that is not all he wanted Dean, so don't try and pretend it is. I know Crowley and he wouldn't save Sam for that, no matter how close to humanity he was." Castiel said when dean was silent. He wanted to know what it was that Dean had done.

"He wanted me to-" at that Dean turned to look at Cas and the words stuck in his throat. He couldn't do it. He couldn't tell him that Crowley had wanted him to make Cas fall in love with him. He just couldn't say the words, he couldn't. He opened and closed his mouth several times before turning away from the former angel and staring once more at the wall. But that didn't help, still the words would not come.

"He wanted you to do what Dean?" Castiel asked moving so he was sitting next to the man he loved. He wanted to take his hand, tell him it was okay, they would deal with whatever it was he had promised Crowley. But he couldn't do it. Something stopped him, something made him want to know the answer to his question before he made that sort of commitment to Dean.

"He wanted me to give him intel. Help him keep his power, he'd seen the angels fall, he wanted my assurance I would help him fight them." Dean replied in a whisper already hating himself for the words coming out of his mouth. But he just couldn't tell Cas the truth.

"So that is why you were so sure Crowley would help us find my grace." Castiel replied with understanding as all the little things that had confused him started clicking into place. Crowley had already gained Dean's help removing the angels from earth, Crowley finding his grace was just a continuation of his deal, as was his help in killing Abaddon.

"Yeah." Dean croaked out not truly believing he was actually doing what he was doing. That he was lying to Cas and the angel was buying it. It made him feel like the worst kind of scrum.

"Why did you not tell me?" Castiel asked turning to Dean and taking his hand in his own, noticing how it was shaking. His heart went out to his man at how much stress this had caused him.

"You had enough on your plate. You didn't need any of my shit adding to it." Dean responded looking down at their clasped hands not really believing Cas was still at his side, that he didn't realise what he was doing to him, to them. That he was destroying all the good they had with his stupid words.

"Does Sam know?" Castiel asked tilting his head at Dean, though he was pretty sure he knew the answer to that. He wanted to know for sure before he did or said anything to the other Winchester about this.

"Yeah, that was what we were talking about." Dean responded nodding his head. This at least wasn't a lie. Sam did know, and he wasn't gonna pretend he didn't. He had lied enough in this conversation.

"How you could hurt me, and the lie. Yes it makes sense." Castiel mused as he thought over what Dean had told him and what he had overheard. Yes it all made sense now. A horrible sense, because he knew that the whole reason for Dean making the deal in the first place was because if him. Because he had not done as Dean wished and accompanied him to Sam before returning to heaven. Oh how different things would be if he had done that. If he had gone with Dean, when he was still an angel and still had the power to save Sam.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me to be Dean." He said turning his big blue eyes on Dean, hoping he would forgive him for his mistakes. How Dean could have been so friendly, let alone get in a relationship with him after what he had done, he had no idea. Dean truly was the best of men.

"No Cas. Don't you dare apologise. None of this is your fault, you hear me? None it. Don't you go feeling guilty for what that shit Meta-douche did to you, not now, not ever." Dean snapped moving so he was kneeling in front of Cas and had his face clasped in his hands. He would not let him feel shit about something that wasn't his fault. Especially not when Dean had lied to him. No way, Cas was blameless in all of this.

"But if I had not gone to heaven, if I had listened to Naomi-" Castiel replied begging Dean with his eyes for what he did not know. But he knew he needed something from the man in front of him. Something that would remove the heavy feeling he had inside.

"She was a bitch Cas, neither of us trusted her. You did what you thought was right. End of. Understand?" Dean growled moving so his face was inches from Cas'. He wanted to shake him until he understood he was not to blame, but he refrained from doing so.

Castiel stared down into Dean's green eyes filled with complete belief in him, complete faith in the words he was saying and he felt the heaviness drift away as quickly as it had come. Dean did not blame him.

"Yes Dean." he replied with a smile for the man who had the power to make him feel so much better with just the conviction in his words.

"Are you just saying that because you think it's what I want to hear? Or do you really mean it?" Dean asked sitting back so he could take in the whole of Cas' face and not just his eyes, so he could see the whole expression.

"I mean it Dean. I am sorry I wasn't there to heal Sam, but I know it was not my fault. I understand why you went to Crowley, and I understand why you made that deal. Just do one thing for me?" Castiel asked with a quirk of his lips and a twinkle appearing in his eyes, making Dean know he was indeed speaking the truth.

"Anything Cas." Dean promised, and he meant it. He would do anything Cas asked of him then, and forever more. He was Cas' to do with as he wished.

"Promise me you'll never kiss him again. I want to be the only one you kiss from now on." Castiel replied smirking now as he saw Dean's eyes widen and laughter enter them at his words. He was glad he was able to bring the light he loved back into those green depths which had seemed so tortured when he told him what he had done. He needed Dean to know he did not blame him. That he understood.

"I promise. Once was scaring enough. I love you Cas, and I'll never want anyone else but you. You know that right?" Dean responded the jokey tone leaving as he turned his words serious, wanting Cas to know he meant every one of them.

"I do Dean." Castiel replied smiling softly at him. He wanted to say that he loved Dean as well, but he knew it was not the right time. Dean would not accept his words if he tried to speak them now. But soon, he would say them soon.

"Good." Dean breathed in relief moving his hands so they were no longer clasping Cas' face but rather stroking it gently.

"Now, I believe it is custom that when you have neglected to tell your partner something important you give them a gift." Castiel said raising his hands to Dean's and pulling them down so they were resting in his lap, giving him a chance to move his face closer to Dean's, move it to within kissing distance.

"Okay, what do you want Cas?" Dean asked with his charming smile. He wanted to close the distance and seal his lips onto Cas'. To wash away his guilt with the pleasure he could give the other man.

"How about a nice shower, and you can show me just how complicated shower sex is." Castiel murmured with a raise of his eyebrow and a sultry look in his eyes.

"Oh I think I can manage that one." Dean replied equally lowly as he closed the distance and kissed Cas with all the love he could, trying to make what he had just done right.

"You go and get the water nice and hot, I'll join you in a minute." Dean said when they parted, both needing to breathe.

"Very well Dean. I'll see you in a minute." Castiel replied with a happy smile as he stood and made his way to the door, turning as he got there to give Dean one more beautiful smile before he left, closing it behind him.

At the sound of the door closing Dean sank forwards so his head hit the bed in the exact spot that Cas had just been sitting. He had just lied to Cas. This was so much worse than before when he was just keeping the truth from him. Because this time he had actually lied outright to his face. He felt like such an undeserving pile of shit, but what was done was done. There was nothing he could do to change the fact. He would have to learn to live with the guilt he felt curling in his gut, and try to show Cas in every way he could just what he truly meant to him. Give him everything he asked for, and loved him with every fibre of his being. He could do that, or at least he hoped he could. With a shake of his head Dean stood to remove his clothes before grabbing his robe and his towel. He had a shower to get to, and an angel waiting for him to love him.


	40. Chapter 40

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank giawinchester, Perdition Raiser, littleflor1,** **spnfankat81** **and** **Castielholmeshasthephonebox** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured this story since my last update.**

 **Now I know some of you were not too happy with the last chapter, I am sorry. I just don't see Dean telling Cas the truth with what's at stake, he will find out soon, I promise. (And I promise it will have a happy ending, eventually.) But for now, complicate shower sex. Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

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Dean entered the shower room to find it filled with steam, though he could make out the outline of Cas under the water. Removing his robe and placing his towel next to Cas' he made his way to the shower, climbing in as silently as he could so for a second he could just take in the sight of Cas, standing with his eyes closed, letting the water run down his face and body. He looked so at peace and happy right then, as if the shower was removing all thoughts from his mind apart from the joy it was giving him. Dean moved quietly to stand behind Cas, wrapping him in his arms he pulled him against his body and started to pepper his neck with butterfly kisses barely stronger than the water raining down on them both.

"I hope that is you Dean." Castiel said in a purring kind of voice not opening his eyes as he relaxed his body against the man behind.

"And what would you do if it wasn't?" Dean asked with a smirk as he moved his hands from Cas' waist so he could explore his wet chest.

"Worry about who had invaded the bunker and how they were still alive?" Castiel mused in response. It was not like he could imagine Kevin or Sam joining him in shower after all.

"Well then, good thing it's just me." Dean replied rubbing his nose in Cas' wet hair, smelling the apple scent from his shampoo. Damn he loved that stuff.

"Ummm. Now Dean. I believe you promised to show me shower sex?" Castiel responded opening his eyes and tilting his head back so he could stare into the green of Dean's. His filled with love and affection, as well as anticipation at what he wanted to with Dean.

"So I did." Dean replied moving round Cas so they were standing face to face under the spray of water, loving the way it dripped off the angels eyelashes. He was here to show Cas the perfect time, show him how much he loved him. He could do that. He could make up for the lies he told.

"Well I have some ideas." Castiel murmured smirking at Dean before he slammed him against the wall, positioning himself between his legs and capturing Dean's lips in a passionate kiss that removed all thoughts of there previous conversation from both their minds. They were them, Dean and Cas. Just two men who loved each other doing what they wanted, no needed, to do. They were there to show their love and passion in a hot and heavy fashion that they had both come to like. The one where Castiel was mostly in control.

When Castiel pulled back from the kiss he moved his lips to Dean's neck and proceeded to kiss and suckle his way down it as his hands moved round Dean's thighs, grabbing him at the junction where they met his buttocks.

"Umm Cas…" den said understanding from the other man's movements what he had in mind. But he also knew that that wasn't easy. I mean it wasn't like he was light enough for Cas to hold up for long.

"Trust me Dean." Castiel murmured into his ear stilling anything else he was going to say. If this was the way Cas wanted it, then this was how they were gonna do it.

With that decided in his mind he raised one of his legs and hooked it around Cas' hip, giving his hand access to his ass, so he could prepare his body for what was to come.

Castiel growled in appreciation for Dean's change of position. He now had much better access to where he needed to go. Without further thought he moved his hand so he could slip his wet finger inside of Dean. It seemed that was the good thing about doing this in the shower, there was no need for lubrication. The water provided more than enough.

It wasn't long before Castiel could add a second finger, taking great pleasure in curling them into Dean's prostate and watching how he leaned his head back against the wall and moaned in ecstasy at the feeling. Dean wanted to move, wanted to push himself against Cas' fingers, but there was only so much movement he could make standing on only one leg. He brought his head back so he could look Cas in the eyes, thinking of suggesting the change things up a bit, maybe he could turn round so he could fuck himself against the angel. But one look at the smug grin and dominance that was shining in Cas eyes and Dean knew he was just where Cas wanted him. At his mercy. With that realisation he let his head fall back once more and let himself go. This was for Cas, this was what Cas wanted, so this was how it would be. He was Cas' to do with as he wished, and he kinda liked that feeling. The feeling of completely letting go.

Castiel felt when Dean surrendered to him completely. He felt it in the relaxation of the other man's body and the way he became more pliable, ready for Castiel to mould as he would. He felt a powerful surge at that. He had Dean and he was his. No one else had claim on him. It was a primeval need he knew that, but he had to make Dean know he was his, make sure that Crowley, or anyone else for that matter, never got his man again.

Soon he was adding the third finger, he knew Dean was so close to being ready for him, but he would not enter him early no matter how much he wished he could. He would not cause him pain. So instead he continued with the three fingers, though now rather than teasing Dean with tastes of pleasure he was thrusting his hand inside him, causing him to open his mouth, panting at the need his body had to have more. But Dean did not ask for it. He would wait until Cas decided to enter him. He was completely in his hands.

Finally Castiel decided Dean was ready. Removing his fingers he wrapped his hand around the thigh which was not already wrapped around his waist.

"Give me your leg Dean." he growled his voice even deeper than usual due to the desire coursing through him.

At his words Dean raised his head and opened his eyes, blinking for a second while he remembered where they were. But as soon as he did he did as Cas asked and allowed himself to be lifted, moved so his legs were wrapped around Cas' waist and his arms were around his shoulders. Trying to take some of the weight off of the hands which were now on his ass, pulling it apart and positioning it for Cas' entry.

Castiel shifted slightly when he had Dean around him, making it so his body was pushing the man into the wall to take some of the weight. Once he had found a good footing he positioned his erection below Dean's entrance, and looking into the green eyes he loved he entered in one smooth and powerful thrust. This was not a position that either of them could hold for long. They both knew that. Just as they both knew that what was to come would be fast and hard, and oh so pleasurable for them both.

Castiel barely gave Dean time to adjust to his size before he was pulling out and thrusting in again, pounding into Dean's ass while all the other man could do was groan in pleasure at the feel of it. Dean couldn't move, all he could do was grab Cas' shoulders tight to show how much he was enjoying what he was doing to him. Show him how much he loved him taking control.

Castiel moved from looking into Dean's eyes to having his head buried in his neck as he pounded into him, both of the moaning each other's name and groaning in pleasure to the backdrop of the shower of the water raining down on them.

With their bodies now pressed together Dean felt the wet friction of Cas moving on his on cock, driving him on to oblivion. It didn't take long before he was arching his back from the wall and crying Cas' name as he came.

Castiel stopped to watch him, let him have that movement, enjoying the feel of the muscles in his ass contracting around him. But the second Dean was done Castiel pounded into him once more with renewed vigour. Wanting to find his own pleasure in the man in his arms. It wasn't more that three or four thrust before he joined Dean in orgasm.

When he was done Castiel let Dean's legs fall gently back to earth, letting them drop down to support the man's weight, only for them to find that they no longer did. As such they both found themselves sitting on the floor of the shower wrapped in each other's arms, letting the water wash away the proof of what they had just done. They didn't care. It had been what they had both needed after what had happened between them. Dean felt the guilt lift slightly at the confirmation of his love for Cas and his silent submission to the angel he loved, and Castiel felt the reaffirmation that Dean was his, and only his. Yes that was exactly what they both needed.

They sat like that for a long time. Wrapped together as the water washed over them, cleaning them of what had been. Letting them both start to look to what was next, look to the future, look to what could be.


	41. Chapter 41

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, giawinchester,** **Raheem and spnfankat81 for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

 _'Every minute from this minute now  
We can do what we like anywhere  
I want so much to open your eyes  
'Cause I need you to look into mine'_

 _Open Your Eyes – By Snow Patrol_

* * *

Castiel woke surrounded in the warmth that was Dean wrapped around him like an octopus. The man's arms where holding him so tightly Castiel wasn't sure he could move, and when he realised Deans legs were lying over his he knew he couldn't. Not that he really cared too much about that. Though he would like to be able to turn round and watch Dean sleep, if he could manage that without waking the other man. Moving as gently and slowly as he could, stopping often to make sure Dean's breathing hadn't changed from deep slumber, he finally made it so he was lying face to face with Dean. Very close face to face, it seemed his lover had been sleeping with his face buried in his hair again. Leaning back slightly Castiel couldn't help but smile at the sight that greeted him. Dean always looked so peaceful like this. It was one of Castiel's favourite ways to see him. Well no, that wasn't strictly true, any way was Castiel's favourite way to see Dean, even when he was pissed or disappointed with him, he still liked the way he looked. Loved the heart which gave cause to the heat in Dean's eyes. But now was not a time to be thinking of that. They had talked and there was no longer any secrets between them. He was glad that they had been able to get over that first hurdle without one of them storming off in a huff. Yes they had done very well.

With a sigh Castiel realised he would need to move before Dean woke, he was forever telling him not to watch him sleep, he should probably start to at least try and do as he wished. With that in mind and the idea of he would really like a cup of coffee, Castiel carefully made his way out of their bed, grabbing Dean's rode as he went towards the door. He had realised that he wanted to be the only one to see Dean naked, so he would return the favour and make sure he was covered while walking around the bunker. Tying the rode as he went Castiel made his way to the kitchen and the coffee machine. He felt his stomach grumble as well, but while he could make coffee, he still wasn't sure he would be able to manage breakfast unsupervised, and he would prefer not to do as Sam had done the day before. No one liked the smell of burnt food after all.

* * *

Sam woke and stretched before turning to his phone to see what time it was. 6am. The perfect time to go for a run, clear his head of everything and get some fresh air. Find his balance before he had to deal with the aftermath of whatever had happened with Dean and Cas the previous day. He hadn't seen either of them since he ran from the car, but he knew that today he would have to face them both. Hopefully they had managed to have a mature discussion about it and resolved it like adults. Oh who was he kidding, this was Dean he was talking about. Since when did his brother ever do the mature thing? No doubt he would be doing some serious damage limitation today. Oh well run first, it wasn't like either of them would be up this early anyway.

Making his way to the kitchen Sam checked as he smelt fresh coffee brewing. It seemed someone else was up after all. Cautiously making his way to the kitchen door he peaked round it, surprised at what he saw. Not the idea of Cas making coffee, but more that the former angel was doing it while wearing Dean's robe. Which meant he had to have come from Dean's room. Did that mean Cas accepted what Dean had done and forgiven him? Really? Or was it the more likely solution that Dean hadn't told him anything? Yeah that sounded about right. No doubt his brother had found ways of getting Cas to forget what Crowley had said, for a while at least. Damn it Dean. He needed to come clean here.

Sam stood there trying to decide if he should go into the kitchen and face whatever the result was or if he should take the coward's way out and just walk by, when the decision was taken out of his hands.

"Good morning Sam, would you like some coffee?" Castiel asked turning to smile at taller man who was hovering in the doorway. No doubt Sam was wondering if Dean had told him of his deal, he got the impression that the younger Winchester had not believed he would be accepting of it. Though why that should be so he did not know. Of course working with Crowley was never a good idea, but it could have been much worse.

"Morning Cas. So umm, how you doing?" Sam asked walking through the door and going to grab himself some water to take with him on his run.

"I am well, and you?" Castiel asked amiably pouring the coffee into two mugs. No doubt Dean would be awake soon, what better way to wake than with a coffee brought to him?

"Yeah, I'm fine… so um… you and Dean talk yesterday?" Sam asked trying to think a way of asking the question without mentioning any deals. There was no way he would be the one telling Cas if Dean hadn't done so.

"He told me of his deal with Crowley, yes." Castiel replied picking up his own drink and breathing in the strong smell.

"And you're okay with it?" Sam asked in complete disbelief. He had no idea how Cas could be so accepting of what Dean had done. Surely even the angel who had such blind faith and love for his brother could see what a dick move he'd made.

"Yes, I am." Castiel responded after a beat, taking a sip so he could be sure of his words.

"Wow, you're better man than me Cas." Sam replied with slight awe in his tone and an honestly happy smile on his face. He had no idea how he had done it, but it seemed Dean had got Cas to understand his crazy reasoning.

"How so?" Castiel asked with a frown, wondering why Sam was so hung up on the deal.

"Well if Dean had made a deal to get me to fall in love with him, I don't think I would be so accepting." Sam responded, though luckily not looking at Castiel as he said it. He didn't even think of the words as he spoke them, didn't consider the effect they could have on the other man in the room with him. He was just so glad that it was all out in the open now and no one seemed worse for it.

"I see." Castiel replied after a second, turning to place his cup on the counter, and also so he had his back to Sam. He did not want the other man to see his reaction to his careless words. To words he was hearing spoken for the first time from Dean's brother rather than the man himself.

"well, I'm just glad you got it all sorted. I'm umm, going for a run. So see you later?" Sam responded suddenly feeling a slight chill in the conversation. No doubt Cas didn't want to be reminded of all that crap, not if he and Dean had sorted it out. He should have probably kept his mouth shut now he thought about it.

"Have fun." Castiel forced out turning and smiling at Sam as if he had no cares in the world, but in truth wanting nothing more than to be left alone. To try and process what he had just learnt. To try to work out what it meant.

Castiel stood there for a good five minutes. His brain refusing to accept the words Sam had just spoken as the truth. Dean wouldn't do that to him. He loved him, he would never trade his feelings, even if it was for his brother's life. He meant the same to Dean as Sam did surely, so no. He just wouldn't do it. But even as these thoughts went through his head a small voice at the back of his mind gained confidence and asked repeatedly, "are sure about that?" Castiel could think of no way to answer that question standing in the kitchen as he was. The only way he would know the truth would be to ask Dean. Yes that was what he would do, he would go and ask Dean.

With that decided he reached out for the two coffees only to find his hands shaking. What was wrong with him, was he ill? No. This… was this shock? He had seen it in others, but he had never thought to experience it himself. He needed to get to Dean. Needed to talk to Dean, and needed to do it right now. Taking a deep breath and balling up his fingers tight before stretching them out, he set his shoulders back and reached once more for the mugs. Glad that this time at least his hands were steady. With this new determination in mind he turned back to Dean's room. Time to find out the truth.


	42. Chapter 42

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank giawinchester, littleflor1, horsegirl2430 and spnfankat81** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, confrontation Dean and Cas style. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean woke to find himself alone in his bed, this caused a frown to appear on his face. Where was Cas? Why wasn't he here? He'd thought they had sorted everything out the previous night, so why wasn't he lying there next to him? Just before he was about to jump out of bed and start searching through the bunker the door was pushed open and there was his angel, holding two cups of coffee. Oh man, he was so awesome.

"Morning Cas." Dean said with a wide smile upon his face at the slight of the man he loved wearing his robe. It suited him, though he reckoned he would look better in something big and fluffy, maybe blue to match his eyes? Hmm, he would have to see if he could find something for Cas the next time he went to town.

"Hello Dean." Castiel replied carefully putting the coffee down before turning to the man he had realised so recently that he loved. It felt like he was floating, as if he wasn't truly there… or maybe it was more like he had been in the first few weeks and years with this man. Because as he stood there and took in the beauty of Dean's face his brain was cataloguing his every facial expression, his every word, and every emotion he could see in those bright green eyes. The only difference between now and then was that now he knew this man so much better. He could see things that he would have missed in those early days, things that the angel of the lord who had pulled Dean from perdition would not have been able to understand.

"Nice robe." Dean responded cheekily, completely unaware of the upheaval Castiel was trying to process. Unaware that his brother had unintentionally let the cat out of the bag.

"I thought it better than walking around the bunker naked." Castiel replied absently as he moved to sit on the bed so he could watch Dean. But he made sure he wasn't close enough to be pulled into a kiss. He wasn't sure he could cope with kissing him right then. No, he needed space for the conversation that he knew he needed for them to have.

"Yeah, no doubt you would have given Sammy heart failure if he had seen you otherwise." Dean chuckled reaching for the coffee, even if what he really wanted to do was reach for Cas. But he got the distinct impression from the former angel that that would not go down well right then. What was going on? What had happened between them falling asleep and him waking this morning? Why was Cas being this way?

"Yes." Castiel replied simply trying to figure out how to ask the question he needed to. But he couldn't find the right words for it. The right way to say it without Dean going defensive or flying out of the room as if a hell hound was after him.

"Hey Cas, you alright?" Dean asked cautiously after taking a fortifying sip of coffee. Whatever it was, he needed to sort it now. Because he couldn't let it fester, couldn't let Cas slip away from him. Not now, not after his lie to preserve what they had.

"I…" Castiel started to say, but found the rest of the words would not come. He found himself conflicted inside. He didn't want to ask Dean, did not want the confirmation from his lips which would destroy his memories of them since he had become human. But he also wanted to know, needed to know if it was all a lie.

"Cas? Your scaring me now man. What's up?" Dean asked sitting up and resting his hand on Cas' arm. He wanted to pull him into his embrace but at his touch he felt Cas tense. What the hell was going on? Surely… he didn't know the truth right? No. There was no way it could be that. Right?

"Did you…" Castiel started again, but again found he could not continue.

"Did I what Cas?" Dean asked evenly removing his hand from the former angel's mars as he looked into his eyes trying to see if he had indeed somehow discovered the real deal he had made with Crowley. Tried to see if his worst fear had been realised.

Castiel looked right back and found the answer to his question in Dean's eyes. It was there as clear as day. There was something Dean had not told him. A truth he had kept to himself the previous evening, and he had no doubt that it was as Sam said. The true deal he had made with Crowley. The deal to make him fall in love with him. He didn't know what to do with that, how to even think to process it, all he knew was he needed to get out of this room and away from Dean so he could try and work out what he was going to do now. Work out how this changed everything he had believed. Try to understand the emotions running through him. With that he broke eye contact, knowing he could no longer look at Dean. Not now.

"Cas?" Dean whispered when the angel he loved turned away from him. His voice shook with fear at the only possible reason he could come up with for him to behaving this way. He knew, he knew what Dean had done and he was gonna leave him and everything would be ruined. Son of a bitch. He should have told the truth yesterday. Of course if he had this conversation would have happened then and Cas would have left him. A day didn't make any difference to the final outcome in his mind.

Dean opened his mouth to try and think of a way to defend himself, a way to get Cas to stay. But before he could speak Castiel did.

"I have decided to go for a run."

"Why?" Dean asked wondering if this was code for leaving and never coming back.

"I need to process everything that happened yesterday." Castiel replied turning towards Dean but still not able to look him in the eyes.

"Okay, give me a sec and I'll come with you." Dean responded moving as if to climb out of bed. He needed time to explain. Needed to time to sort this out, if he could. Oh god he hoped he could.

"Dean you do not run unless you are chasing something or being chased. I will go alone." Castiel replied standing up resolutely. He needed peace and time alone to sort through his feelings. And the outdoors was always his favoured place to try and find peace.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea Cas." Dean said gently, not wanting to anger Cas, but also not sure he could let him go.

"Dean, I have the same protection as you do. No angels or demons will be able to find me and I'll take my blade just in case. I will be in no more danger than when you go for a supply run, in fact I will be in less, as I am a much better fighter." Castiel snapped rounding to glare at the man in the bed. He did not need Dean's protection, nor did he want his company. They were not joined at the hip, they could both do things alone. He used to be an angel for god's sake. He was very capable of looking after himself.

"Wow, okay Cas. Chill." Dean replied seeing the force of the glare. That was not a good look on Cas. That was the seriously pissed of angel glare.

"I just need to be alone Dean." Castiel responded with a sigh his face going from angelic fury to human confusion in a split second making Dean gulp at what he could see.

"Alright, then I'll see you when you get back I guess." Dean nodded knowing there was nothing else he could do to keep the guy here. Not right now at least.

"Yes."

Without another words Castiel turned and left the room to go and change into some suitable clothing for running. He had seen what Sam was wearing that morning, he had some sweat pants and tees he could wear. Anything to get out of this place.

And Dean still lying in the bed looked at the door with fear in his eyes. He had an idea of what was going on with Cas, and if it was true then it really wasn't good. He had to think of some way to get Cas back. He lay there until he heard Cas' door open and close once more, telling him the angel had gone for his run. With that he jumped out of bed, he couldn't stay here while trying to figure this out. He needed to get out of the bunker, work out what he could do to make it up to Cas, if it was even possible. No it had to be. He remembered the conversation yesterday where Cas talked about presents to make it up to him. He could do that. He could get Cas shit loads of presents. It was a start at least right? With that in mind he had the quickest shower possible before grabbing his keys and heading to his car. He had to go shopping.

* * *

Castiel moved quickly through the woods surrounding the bunker, he had no destination in mind, just the need to get far away from the betrayal. He tried out running the questions pounding in his mind, tried to force his body to work so hard he had no time to think. It worked for the first few miles, but then it was as if he was coming back to himself, coming out of the floating angel vibe he had had when he had talked to Dean. And with that feeling came one clear question in his mind. It came to him with such force he had to stop running because he couldn't breathe. It was, he realised with completely clarity, the only question that held any real importance in all of this.

Did Dean really love him or was it all a game to win his heart?

He found himself leaning against a tree wrapping his arms around himself as the question pounded through his head in time with his shallow breathing. Because, while before he had been so sure of the answer, been so sure Dean did in fact love him, he now no longer knew. But he also had no idea how to find out. It wasn't like he could ask Dean was it? Whichever the truth was, whether Dean did love him or if he was just 'faking it' he would tell him the same thing. He would say that of course he loved him. No, what he needed was another source. He thought briefly of asking Sam, but he knew that the younger Winchester would always side with Dean. He would tell him that of course Dean loved him, he was just an idiot or some such crap. No, what he needed was an impartial judge, someone who knew all the ins and outs of the deal. It was then that the solution presented itself to him. It wasn't one he wanted to use, nor one he could even believe he was thinking of trusting. But he knew, deep down inside, that the only person who could tell him the truth of all this was the one who made the deal in the first place.

It seemed he needed to talk to Crowley.


	43. Chapter 43

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank abovely girl, Perdition Raiser, Guest, giawinchester, Raheem and Castielholmeshasthephonebox for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, the talk between Castiel and Crowley, I hope you like the way I have written it. I always think that Crowley sees Cas as an equal and vice versa, there is strange sort of respect between the two in my mind.**

 **Anyway I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own supernatural.**

* * *

Castiel returned to the bunker, going in via the garage in the hopes he could grab the ingredients he would need for summoning Crowley from the back of the impala. But what he found was that the car was no longer there. Which meant only one thing. Dean had gone out. Castiel wasn't sure if he was relieved or worried by this, on the one hand it would make what he was about to do much easier if both Sam and Dean were out of the bunker, but on the other, what was Dean doing? Had he gone out to get drunk and pull some random woman because he thought they were now a lost cause? Had he decided to give up on them? No he won't do that. If nothing else, Sam's life was still on the line. Dean would not risk that. But he would go out and drink away his problems. It was the staple of Dean Winchester to do that it seemed. Castiel hoped that wasn't what he had gone to do, but right now he needed to figure out how he was going to summon the demon. Sort out Dean once he knew exactly what was going on, and exactly why the deal for his heart had been made. When he knew what Dean truly felt for him.

Moving into the library Castiel went to where he knew Sam kept the spare supplies. Opening the cupboard he found all he needed and picking it up he made his way to the room Dean had told him on his tour was their dungeon. That was just the place he needed to summon Crowley. He would not be able to get out of the devils trap in there to investigate the bunker, but it was close and very private. Kevin would not come into that room, he had no reason to.

Making his way into the room he frowned when he was confronted with just shelves. The place he was looking for must be hidden somehow. So putting down his stuff he searched around until he found the seam in the shelves that meant he could pull them aside, revealing a stone room with shackles on the walls, and a devils trap made of iron worked into the floor. Oh yes, this was perfect. Turning to the pull the shelves shut behind him so no one would know he was there, he moved to get ready to have a talk with the king of hell.

It didn't take him long to set every up and perform the ritual. He knew it well after all. Then he stood back, his angel blade in hand as he waited for the one person who could hopefully answer his questions, if he was in the right mood at any rate. Oh no, Castiel would make sure he was in the right mood, he would make him answer. Because he needed answers, and if he had to torture Crowley to get them, then so be it.

"Well this is new? Where did you get yourself such a lovely dungeon Castiel?" Crowley said as he appeared in the centre of the trap and saw who it was who summoned him. He had no idea why the former angel was alone, here, but he could guess. It seemed squirrel had come clean. About bloody time in his mind.

"That does not matter." Castiel stated defensively not wanting Crowley to find out where they were. It would not be good if the king of hell could drop by any time after all.

"Oh, so this is the where the boys live is it? Homely I must say." Crowley replied with a smirk deducing the truth easily enough from Castiel defensiveness. He really needed to learn how to lie.

"Crowley," Castiel growled moving his blade into a fighting position as he took a step forwards, though making sure he didn't cross the devils trap.

"Castiel." Crowley responded in the same voice. He knew he couldn't do anything to hurt him. He was impotent now, not a threat to him. Especially considering he was currently searching for his grace so he could re-open heaven. Of course then he realised the absurdity of what they were doing. Surely they had known each other long enough to dispense with all this posturing. So with a sigh and a roll of his eyes he spoke in a more normal voice, one that even verged on the side of friendly.

"Why am I here?"

"I want to know about the deal you made with Dean." Castiel stated, time to get the answers he seeked.

"Well surely that's between squirrel and me, right?" Crowley replied with a smirk. He would not tell Castiel anything until he knew what the former angel knew. That was Dean's job, not his.

"Did you make a deal for Dean to make me fall in love with him in return for Sam's life?" Castiel asked plainly, he knew Crowley, and he knew he wouldn't get answers unless he laid his cards on the table first.

"Yes." Crowley replied simply, impressed that Dean had told Castiel all. He had thought that he would chicken out at the last moment, it seemed he was giving the guy too little credit.

"Why?" Castiel asked in a confused voice, he couldn't understand what Crowley got from this. Why he would do this? Unless he was planning on enjoying watching his pain when he realised his love was unrequited.

"I did it for you Castiel." Crowley replied in rare honesty. He could see the confusion in the man's eyes, and he could guess that he was wondering if Dean really loved him or if he was doing it all to save Sam. He didn't want that. The whole point of the deal was to get those two bloody idiots together after all.

"How was it for me?" Castiel asked in disbelief. He could not think of any scenario where Crowley would do anything for him, nor could he work out how this would be of benefit to the demon.

"Oh come on. Its obvious to everyone you've been in love with the boy since the first. It's just as obvious that he feels the same for his favourite angel. But he is also Dean Winchester. There was no way he would ever make the first move, and considering you have learnt your humanity from him, neither would you. So I gave Dean a little push, an incentive to do what he wanted to, that was all. The feelings were already there, but now you are both acting on them." Crowley replied with a shrug as if it was nothing of consequence. As if his actions had been nothing more than a simple catalysis that got them to open there eyes.

"But… what do you get out of that?" Castiel asked with frown. From what Crowley was saying, Dean did love him and the demon knew that. And that was why he made the deal. But that made no sense to Castiel, not from what he knew about Crowley.

"Did you know Sam was seconds away from completely the final trial when Dean stopped him?" Crowley asked seemingly changing the subject.

"What does that have to do with this?" Castiel asked scrabbling to keep up with this, his mind was still trying to decide if Crowley had truly meant that Dean loved him or not.

"I was more human than demon when Dean came to me to ask me to save his brother. He offered me his soul you know, but I couldn't take it. Instead I wanted to give him something good. Something he deserved. Something he craved. I wanted to give him the one person he loved and who I knew loved him back. A partner for the rest of his life. I wanted to give him you. So that was what I did." Crowley answered staring Castiel in the eyes as he spoke so he could see the truth of his words, see the residue humanity which still lurked in them.

"I can understand that feeling." Castiel breathed as he saw in Crowley's eyes something he had felt deep inside for so long. The feeling of how the Winchesters could change a being, change an angel from one who followed orders and nothing else to one who tried to save humanity, and change a demon from wanting self-power at any cost to wanting to help others find happiness. With that look Castiel found an understanding with the king of hell he had never thought to have, and he wasn't sure how long it would last. But for now it was there. They had both been touched by the Winchesters in one way or another. And that touch was not one to be taken lightly.

"I thought you would. So what are you going to do now?" Crowley asked with a self-deprecating smile. He still couldn't believe what he had done, but he knew, deep down, if asked right now he would do the same thing again, not that he would admit that to anyone, ever.

"I don't know." Castiel replied honestly trying to process all he had learnt.

"He loves you, you love him. Is there really any point arguing over how you got together? Just enjoying being together." Crowley suggested. He didn't want them fighting over this, he wanted them to get over it and move on. Forget all about the bloody deal, then he could too. Yes that would be good. Let them all forget about his moment of weakness when he wanted an angel and a hunter to find love with each other.

"Does he really love me?" Castiel asked no longer concerned about showing weakness to Crowley, no longer worried that he would not tell him the truth. The secrets the demon had shared with him here in this room told him he would not lie, nor would he use his weakness against him. After all Castiel now knew his as well.

"Yes, he does. Always has done. Now I think it's time I left, I have a grace to find I believe. If you would be so kind." Crowley replied with a roll of his eyes that Castiel was still questions Dean's feelings. I mean seriously, now insecure was the guy?

"Of course." Castiel responded automatically moving to break the trap he had Crowley in.

"I'll call when I have it. See you soon Castiel." Crowley said as he left. Going back to his search Crowley could pretend that the conversation he had just had with Castiel never happened, put it out of his mind, just as he tried to do with the reasoning behind the deal he made with Dean. They were thing it was best that the king of hell did not dwell on, after all he had demons to control and command, and they could never know of his humanity.


	44. Chapter 44

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, EruthiadwenGreenleaf, Raheem, kaerfemina, giawinchester,** **spnfankat81 and Castielholmeshasthephonebox** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So this chapter is really short I know, but the next one is much longer I promise. Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean returned home from his shopping expedition, but before removing the gifts he had brought from his trunk he scouted out the lay of the land, wanting to make sure a certain former angel wouldn't see what he was bringing in until he was ready to show him. Seeing the corridors empty and the shower running he guessed that his brother and Kevin were in the library and Cas was in the shower. That was good, that would give him plenty of time to get the things into their room and set everything up.

Moving quickly back to his car he grabbed the two bags in one hand before picking up the piece de résistance carefully, making sure he didn't damage it in any way as he carried it into its new home.

Once in the bedroom he threw the bags onto the bed and then looked round for a place to put his precious cargo. It was then he realised the problem with his plan. The one he had thought so clever when he had seen this in the store. This was his room, and as such there was no space for Cas to put any of his stuff. Not that that had mattered before now considering he didn't actually had any. But now he did, Dean needed somewhere to put it. He also realised that if this was to be his and Cas' room then the former angel should probably have some draws and space in the wardrobe and all that crap.

Placing his present for Cas gently on the floor out of sight of the rest of the room he left once more. This time on a search for two things. One a chest of draws he could move into their room for Cas, and Sam to help him with doing it. He found the first easily enough, this place was filled with disused rooms and furniture, the second was harder to track down. Sam wasn't in the library as he had amused he would be, in fact that place was empty for the first time since he could remember. With a shake of his head he went to his brother's room, hoping he would be there.

"Hey Sammy." He called quietly as he knocked on the door hoping his brother was there, but that Cas, whether he was wouldn't hear him.

"Hey Dean, what's up?" Sam asked pulling the door open his hair still wet from the shower he had had after his run.

"I need your help." Dean replied gesturing his brother to follow him. He was on the clock here, though if Sam had just had a shower then it was him he had heard, so where was Cas? No. Sort out the room first, then go looking for the guy and hope to god he could find him. Surely he hadn't run off right?

"What with?" Sam asked following his brother though not particularly happily. He would prefer to have breakfast rather than do whatever it was his brother had in his mind to do now.

"Moving something." Dean responded turning round the corner and checking the way was clear before he continued.

"Moving what? And why are you acting like that?" Sam asked when he noticed his brother's strange behaviour. What the fucking hell was going on now? He'd thought it had all been sorted and everything was back to normal, or as normal as their life ever was.

"This." Dean said flinging open the door and showing Sam the chest of draws he wanted to relocate to his and Cas' room. So that it really would be theirs and not just his.

"Okay, why?" Sam asked crossing his arms and giving Dean a bitchface at having to move furniture before he had eaten.

"Cos Cas needs somewhere to keep his clothes." Dean responded with a shrug not looking Sam in the eye making the other man narrow his at Dean. He was trying to decide whether to demand Dean explain his behaviour or not, but then he realised if he did that then it would be even longer before he got any food. And right now his stomach was definitely the first priority. He could quiz Dean later.

"Fine." Sam replied with a sigh moving to get into position so he could grab the end which would be walking forwards. If Dean wanted his help, then he could damn well have the difficult bit.

It didn't take long for the two Winchesters to move the chest of draws into Dean's room and position them next to his own. Once it was done Sam just turned round and walked out the door with only one thing on his mind. Food.

* * *

Dean closed the door behind his brother and smiled at the chest of draws. Yeah Cas would like that, the idea that this really was his room as well as Dean's. With a nod he turned back to the two bags, pulling a box from one of them and opening the contents onto the bed. He picked up the instruction manual and frowned at the crazy diagrams and words. But he was sure he could work it out. Hell he had rebuilt his baby more than once, surely putting this together would be a piece of cake compared to that.

With that decided he grabbed some tools and got to work.


	45. Chapter 45

**Hello again my darlings. So here sit he longer chapter I promised. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Castiel had stayed in the dungeon after Crowley had left, thinking over all he had said. He had sat himself down on the floor and closed his eyes as he knew people did when they were meditating, though in truth he was just thinking. He was trying to work out if Crowley had spoken the truth to him. Oh he knew Crowley thought he was speaking the truth, but the question was, was it really the truth? Did Dean really love him?

After sitting there for nearly an hour going over Crowley's arguments and remembering the time he and Dean had had together he was still not completely convinced. He realised that he was not going to find anything else out in this room or in his mind, the only way to find out just how Dean really felt now would be to see the man. To see how he was with him now he knew he knew the truth. See if his behaviour changed in any way. See if the love he had been so sure he had seen in Dean's eyes, had been so convinced of, was as real as he hoped it was.

At least he knew one thing now for sure. Sam would not be harmed no matter what happened between him and Dean. Crowley had said it himself that he knew he loved Dean, therefore Dean had completed his part of the deal. He had got Castiel to see he loved him, so Sam was free. That was one good thing to come of this at least. With a sigh he decided to stop hiding. It was time to face whatever was to come. To face Dean and see where they now stood, whether it was together or apart.

Walking down the corridor aiming to return to his room so he could change out of his running clothes, and maybe even take a shower, he wanted to look his best before he talked to Dean, he was accosted by said man. Well that idea was out the window then.

"Cas, where ya been dude?" Dean asked with a frown, though he tried to keep his tone light. He had everything set up in their room and he had been searching for the former angel. He had started to think he hadn't returned from his run after all. He had started to get desperate, he was even tempted to get Crowley to pin the GPS on Cas' cell, that was now desperate he had gotten. But luckily he didn't have to ask that dick of demon for anything else.

"Meditating." Castiel replied deciding that was the best description of the time he had just spent.

"Oh yeah?" Dean asked trying to sound casual as he was suddenly reminded of the 'future Cas' who spent his time meditating and having orgies while off his face on drugs. That was not gonna happen to his Cas. No way in hell would he let that happen.

"Yes. Did you want me for something?" Castiel asked hoping he could still have a chance to shower before he and Dean talked, anything to put off what was to come. What could ruin all he held dear to his heart.

"Yeah, umm, I've got somethin' for you." Dean replied nervously as he remembered why he had been looking for the man he loved. The man he had hurt, the man he had lied to. Son of bitch, no don't think about that. Just think about what you're gonna do to make it better.

"Okay." Castiel responded with a frown. What did Dean have for him? Was that why he had gone out? To buy him a present? Did Dean really think that that would make it all fine? Because if he didn't love him, then there was nothing Dean could do that would make him stay in a relationship with him. He would not be in that situation where the feelings were one sided. Of course he would stay Dean's friend, but he would not share his bed.

Dean led Cas down the corridor to their room, or at least what he hoped Cas still thought of as their room at any rate. He certainly did. Opening the door and standing so he was in the way of the new chest of draws, as well as the gift he had placed on top of it he gestured to the wrapped present on the bed.

"That's for you." he said drawing Cas' eyes to the bed and away from the rest of the room.

"You did not have to buy me anything Dean." Castiel replied as he moved into the room and picked up the present. It was squishy to the touch and he wondered what was inside.

"Well ya gonna open it or what?" Dean asked from behind him having shut the door and holding his breath waiting for when Cas noticed the additions to the room.

With that Castiel did as Dean suggested and found inside a blue fluffy robe. Was this because he had borrowed Dean's this morning? Was this the other man's way of saying he didn't want to be with him? Turning to Dean and opening his mouth to ask the questions going through his mind Castiel caught sight of the new chest of draws. Though in truth it wasn't the furniture that had caught his attention, it was what was on top of it. Because there, sitting proudly, was an African Violet plant, showing off its beautiful blue flowers.

"Do you like it?" Dean asked when all Cas did was stare at the plant. And when that got no response he found himself rambling. "I went to the flower store, was gonna get you a bunch of roses or something, but the woman there said this would be better."

"But… will it not die in here? There is no natural light Dean." Castiel interrupted him and turned to stare at Dean wondering why he would bring something which would not survive into their home, no matter how pretty it was.

"That's why I got a sunlamp for it. See? She said it should do fine with that and some water mixed with this grow stuff she gave me." Dean replied moving to turn the lamp on. That blasted thing had taken far too long for him to put together for his likely. But it was done now, and seeing Castiel's reaction he just hoped he liked it.

"You got this for me?" Castiel asked not sure what was going through his mind, just amazed that Dean would buy something that was so at odds to who he was. He was not the flowers or nature kind of man.

"Yeah well, I know how you love nature and shit. So…" Dean replied rubbing the back of his neck not sure what else he could say right then. Maybe he shouldn't have done it. Maybe this had been a massive mistake. Oh crap. He hoped not. Cos he had no idea what to do if this failed.

"It is very pretty Dean, thank you." Castiel replied finally moving towards the plant and stroking its leaves and petals. It was then he realised that it stood on a new chest of draws.

"Why are these here?" He asked turning to Dean gesturing to the new furniture.

"Well, I thought you could keep your clothes in them." Dean responded uncomfortably as he realised now presumptuous that sounded considering what Cas had found out. If the guy was gonna leave him, he really wouldn't need his own space in this room now would he?

"You want me to keep my clothes here?" Castiel asked tilting his head as he studied Dean. Looking into his eyes he could see no change in the feelings he had seen in them before this morning. In fact had this happened before he had discovered what he had, he knew he would be overjoyed at Dean's thoughtfulness. But was this just Dean's way to trying to preserve his deal? Because he had suddenly realised Dean did not know there was no need. The man had refused to let him tell him of his feelings. But… why would he do that if that was all he wanted?

"This is our room Cas, if you still want it to be." Dean replied simply crossing his fingers that Cas wouldn't say no. hoping with everything he was that Cas would agree to continue as they were.

Castiel stared at Dean at that, suddenly finding himself with a very human dilemma. If this was Dean just trying to preserve his deal he should tell him that there was no need. But if he did that, would Dean tell him to go? Or he could accept it, forgive Dean for what he had done and return them to how they were. Letting Dean think he was still trying to persuade him fall in love with him. It was so tempting to do that. To give himself more time with the man he loved. But he couldn't. He could not deceive Dean, not in this, no matter how strong the temptation to do so was.

"Dean, you do not have to do this." Castiel said making up his mind. There had been enough secrets and dishonesty between them, he would not add to it.

"Yeah Cas, I really do. I'm so sorry, for everything." Dean replied trying to think of the right words to try and make right what he had done, but there weren't any.

"You do not love me then." Castiel responded with a nod as he pushed down the heartache inside him. Dean was doing this all because of his deal, he needed to tell him it was done and that he was free.

"What?! No." Dean screeched before running his hand over his face and trying again. Moving towards Cas as he spoke, hoping he would let him show him in the only way he knew how that he spoke the truth.

"Of course I love you Cas, I've always loved you, and I always will. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and only you." Dean ended with his hands framing his angels face so he could stare into the eyes which held his world.

"Dean, I love you." Castiel said, deciding it was time. If he said the words then Dean would know that the deal was done. What would happen after would be because they both wanted it to and for no other reason.

Dean lost his breath when he heard the words Castiel spoke. Because he knew what he meant by them. By saying those words to him Cas was releasing him from the deal he had made with Crowley. It was as if he was accepting it, and letting him decide what was to happen next. Giving Dean an out, not that he wanted it. He couldn't believe that Cas could feel that way about him. Not after everything he had done in his life, not to mention all that Cas knew about him. But he had said it, and looking into Cas' eyes he knew that he spoke the truth, he meant every single word, even after... Cas loved him. Cas fucking loved him. He had no idea what he had done to deserve it, but there was no way he was gonna let go of it. With that in mind Dean found he had no words to express how he was feeling at hearing Cas say those three little words, and that feeling had nothing to do with any fucking deals or any of that shit. So instead of speaking he lowered his head and closed the distance between them sealing his lips on his angels and showing through the kiss all he couldn't say.

And Castiel, feeling Deans lips on his felt relief course through him. Dean did love him. He wanted him for him and not because of some deal he made. As such he returned the kiss with equal reverence, for at least half a minute before he decided to take charge and move things along a bit.

Dean felt the change in the kiss, as well as Cas pushing him towards the bed.

"Ur Cas, what ya doin'?" He asked when they broke for air, even if he was still moving backwards.

"Getting you to the bed." Castiel murmured as he kissed Dean's jawline enjoying the feel of the stubble against his lips.

"And why do you want me there?" Dean asked in an attempt at an innocent voice, though he knew it came out rather sultry.

"I have heard, that make-up sex is the best there is. I want to test the theory." Castiel replied standing back as he saw Dean was now standing with the bed behind him.

"And where did you hear that?" Dean asked puzzled. He was pretty sure he had never said anything like that to Cas, so who the hell had?

"I have lived for many years Dean. I picked up a few things. Now remove your clothing." Castiel replied with a smirk. He was done talking, he wanted naked Dean, his favourite kind.

And Dean, well he could think of many things to say to that, but rather than utter a word he did as Cas asked, or ordered, not that he cared. He had Cas, and Cas loved him. He would do anything he said right then.

Once Dean was naked he just stood there waiting for Cas to tell him what to do next, giving the former angel complete control. Something that showed more than words his love for the other man.

"Lie down Dean." Castiel murmured enjoying the frission of excitement he was feeling at having Dean voluntarily at his mercy.

Dean did as he was told, spreading his legs as if inviting Cas to join him. A position Castiel had to say he found very appealing. Moving to the bed he grabbed the lubrication from Dean's bedside table and positioned himself between Dean's legs.

"Raise your knees to your chest Dean." he commanded enjoying his domineering role.

Dean did as he was told and raised them up, using his hands to make sure they stayed high enough for Cas to access his ass. He found a strange perverse pleasure in being naked while Cas was fully clothed and bossed him around. He would have wondered what that said about him, but at the precise moment Cas inserted his finger into him and all thoughts other than the pleasure he was feeling eluded Dean.

It did not take Castiel long to prepare Dean for his entry, though he did enjoy taking as long as he could, watching the expressions on Dean's face as he worked him open, and enjoying torturing him just a little. But when Dean was ready Castiel stepped back. He may have enjoyed being clothed for the first part, but he wanted to feel Dean's skin with his own.

Dean watched with desire as Cas quickly removed his clothes before he re-joined him on the bed. When he was there Castiel took over the job of holding Dean's legs up so he could position himself correctly before he pushed deep inside of Dean with one single thrust.

Dean arched up at the feel of Cas inside him, but once he settled down Castiel let go of Dean's legs and changed his position so he was lying skin to skin with Dean. Lying so he could stare into those beautiful green eyes.

"I love you Dean." He said once again, but before the other man could respond he started to move, his hips driving his erection in and out of Dean while his lips sealed over the other man's so he could ravish his mouth while driving him to pleasure. It was his turn to make Dean know he meant his words.

Dean wanted to tell Cas he loved him back, but he couldn't. His mind was being eroded by the angel on top of him, and he was letting it. He had never had done this before. Never before had he ever let anyone make love to him. Because that was what was happening. Cas was making love to him, and he couldn't get enough of the pleasure that that knowledge gave him. The power that knowing he wasn't alone in the feelings coursing through them. The idea that he was loved in return.

And so Dean and Castiel made love for the first time with both their eyes open to what was between them. Knowing all that had been, and giving to each other all that could be.


	46. Chapter 46

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank littleflor1, Raheem, Destiel-in-a-nutshell, Perdition Raiser, giawinchester, EruthiadwenGreenleaf, Castielholmeshasthephonebox and spnfankat81** **for the wonderful reviews.**

 **I would like to assure those of you who seemed to think we have got to the end. We really haven't, the song is not done yet after all. I reckon we have roughly 15-20 chapters to go. So fear not, more is yet to come. Though those who read my stories regularly know that maybe they should fear more what I have planned, I may have a slight evil streak.**

 **Anyway here is the next chapter, I know it's not very long, but I feel we all need a bit of Destiel fluffiness in our lives right now (before the next crap fest starts lol).**

 **Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean lay in Cas' arms long after they had both found their pleasure. But neither of them wanted to get up, they were enjoying the sated bone deep satiation that their love making had given them to even think about interrupting it. But there was one thing Dean wanted to say, one thing he had wanted to say when Cas was on top of him but hadn't got the chance to.

"Cas, I love you." He whispered against the chest he was lying on and running his fingers gently across.

"I know." Castiel replied with a smile. And he did, he knew Dean loved him and it was the greatest feeling in the world in his mind. Nothing could beat loving and being loved in return.

"Good." Dean muttered closing his eyes with a smile on his lips as he drowsed to the sound of Cas' heart beating beneath his ear.

They could have stayed like that for the rest of the day in their comfortable pleasured peace, had Dean's stomach not interrupted. He hadn't had breakfast before his mad dash out of the bunker to get Cas his presents, and now he was kinda hungry not that he truly care much.

"We should get up." Castiel said hearing the sound of rumbling from Dean. He did not want Dean to go without food because him, they both needed it to survive after all.

"But I don't wanna." Dean murmured burrowing himself closer to Cas if that was at all possible. Everything was perfect right then. He would much prefer it if the real world would stay away from them. Let them have this time together.

"Well, we could always get food and bring it back to bed." Castiel suggested wiggling his way down the bed so that he and Dean were eye to eye as he offered the compromise. One he was all in favour of. They had no pressing reason to return to life outside their room after all.

"We could. You could wear your new robe." Dean replied his mind already envisioning Cas in it. He had known as soon as he had seen it that it would be prefect for his angel. It was fluffy and soft, but protective, and when he had tried to rip it he had found it very strong. The prefect description of the one he loved in his mind. Plus the colour was his favourite, it matched Cas' eyes.

"I could." Castiel contemplated knowing that Dean wanted to see him in the gift he had got him. When he had first seen it he had thought the worst, but now… now he liked the idea of him and Dean in the kitchen getting their food wearing nothing more than their robes for decency. Knowing that they just had to pull the belt and they would be naked. Oh yes, that sounded like a lot of fun, as well as very stimulating.

"Do you like it? I thought it'd feel nice against your skin." Dean murmured in a low tone as he moved to feather kisses down Cas' neck.

"I prefer the feel of you against by skin, but I think it could come a close second." Castiel replied grabbing Dean and pulling him so they were flush against each other as they lay side by side in bed.

"Close hu? I might have to do something about that." Dean muttered in fake offence at Cas' words. The idea that anything could be close to the feel of them together, yeah no. He couldn't have that now could he?

"After breakfast. Once you've eaten, we'll see." Castiel replied with a smirk as he kissed Dean quickly before he pushed him away and moved out of the bed to grab his new robe.

"Once **we've** eaten Cas. Then I will show just how good my skin can feel against yours." Dean responded with emphasis on the word we've. Cas needed to remember he needed to eat too. But even as he said the words he rolled out of his side of the bed and grabbed his own robe. He liked this, them both getting up together and climbing into robes. Them having sides of the bed. It made him feel that they were a normal couple. That this was just another normal day.

With that Dean and Cas made their way to the kitchen, sharing a couple of sweet kisses as they went. Once they arrived they proceeded to make the quickest food they could think of, or Dean could think of at any rate. Though it wasn't as quick as it could have been what with them both stopping to distract the other at every possible turn, be it by planting gentle kisses the back of their neck and pushing their hand through the opening of their robes to stroke the other man's chest, or by pulling slightly on the belt that tied there robe as they pressed their body together, though the latter was more done by Castiel than Dean. He quite liked the idea of taking his man here, across the kitchen surfaces, but Dean knew that his brother or Kevin could walk in at any time, and there was some risks he really wasn't prepared to take. Not yet at least. Of course that didn't stop him from stroking his hands across Cas' body through the fluffy robe. Oh yeah, it really was soft, Dean liked it very much. Hmm, maybe if he got everyone else out of the bunker one day Cas could take him here, wearing his soft robe as he pushed into him. Oh man, that was one hell of an awesome fantasy.

Therefore it was rather a few minutes later that they returned to their room with plates filled with PB and J sandwiches. Striping naked they climbed back into bed and devoured their food before turning once more to each other. Both very hungry for their desert course.

They joined together with lips and tongues and hands, though this time there was no purpose to their touches other than to give and receive pleasure. There was no need to show each other their feelings, they both knew that what they had was love. That it was special and something that deserved to be celebrated, as much as they could.

They were lying side by side when Dean tied to pull Castiel on top of him, to get him to progress on to the next phase of their pleasure, but the former angel refused. Instead he grabbed Dean's leg and pulled it over his hip, giving his hand the perfect access to the area he needed it. Giving him room to prepare Dean for his entry. He wanted them to make love in this position, lying side by side, where not one of them was the dominate party. He wanted to make love to Dean as his partner, as his equal, to do it together.

It wasn't long before Castiel moved down the bed slightly so his erection could met Dean's hole. Before he could push himself inside the man he loved as Dean wrapped his arms around his head and pulled his hair in pleasure at the feel of his entrance. Castiel wrapped one hand under Dean's shoulder while the other went to the man's hip, giving him the perfect leverage so he could push into his man.

And lying there together they moved as one, their breaths mingling as they stared into each other's eyes and they slowly, yet forcefully, showed each other their love. It was like they were in a bubble were all there was was each other. Their eyes were there only guide to anything, and they both shone with only one emotion. Love. There was no frantic kissing or tangle tongues. Just staring and movement, the friction of skin against skin and heavy breathing of two immersed in the act of love.

It was the prefect coupling between the two who had seen so much, and yet only just seen the truth of their own hearts. The prefect coupling of two who knew themselves to be partners in every aspect of their lives. They were together, and nothing could part them. At that moment they both knew it, deep down inside themselves, in their souls and their beings. Nothing could ever separate them, no matter how hard it tried. They were united against all that would come. They would stand strong and they would fight, because at that moment they both knew, they had something worth fighting for. Something more than just surviving, they had each other, and they both knew, in that bubble of a moment that that was more important than anything else in existence.


	47. Chapter 47

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank** **TsukiyomiMidori (Guest), littleflor1, AngelisticSatan, Perdition Raiser, giawinchester,** **spnfankat81** **and EruthiadwenGreenleaf** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

By the following day Sam had decided he had given his brother and Cas enough time to sort things out between them. It was time to get on with sorting out what they would do next. After all they had heaven to open and Cas had agreed to help Crowley defeat Abaddon. They needed to discuss strategies for both these things.

As such once he had had his breakfast and deemed it late enough that he wouldn't be interrupting his brother and Cas in their morning actives he knocked on their door.

"It's open." Called Dean not wanting to move from the warm comfort of their bed, nor the warm comfort of Cas' arms around him.

"Hey, we need to talk." Sam said opening the door and resolutely looking his brother in the eyes and nowhere else. He did not want to see evidence of Dean and Cas' nakedness. If he looked Dean in the face he could pretend it was normal.

"What about?" Dean asked refusing to jump just cos his brother said so. Surely they could have a few days off, I mean Crowley wasn't gonna find Cas' grace that quickly. Why not take a holiday? Take time to spend with the ones they love, or in his case spend all the time he could in bed with Cas.

"We need a plan Dean, for when Crowley returns." Sam replied with a sigh. He knew just what his brother was thinking but he wasn't going to sit around while he and Cas had sex for days on end. I mean Cas was pretty much the pivotal person in any plan they came up with, he couldn't exactly work it out without him.

"That is fine Sam. We will be with you soon." Castiel responded before Dean could open his mouth. He knew they needed to work out what they were going to do next however much he loved spending time with Dean. They all needed to know what would happen once his grace was returned.

"Okay, I'll see you in the library in an hour." Sam replied narrowing his eyes at Dean as he gave him a time frame.

"Sure you don't want to make it two?" Dean responded with a smirk as he considered what he and Cas could get up to in bed in a couple of hours. One just didn't really seem enough to his mind.

"No." was Sam's definite response as he turned and closed the door behind him before waiting for any more replies from the men in bed. He would not wait for Dean to have his fun, they needed to sort this. Once they had finished their talk then Dean and Cas could do as they wished. But they needed to talk first.

Once the door had closed Dean spoke. "Well it looks like we have an hour to fill." He said turning to the man whose arms he was in to kiss him. He could think of many ways to fill an hour.

"We need to get up, have breakfast and shower in that time Dean." Castiel replied pulling out of the kiss and moving to get up, only to be greeted by a pout on Dean's face at the idea of being denied his Cas.

"We can share the shower if you wish." Castiel suggested with a smirk, causing Dean to bound out of bed. If he couldn't have sex with his angel in bed, then the shower was his next favourite place.

As such it was a little over an hour that Dean and Cas joined Sam in the library, both with wet hair and Dean munching on toast as he went.

"So I was wondering, how are we going to kill Abaddon?" Sam asked once they had all sat down around the table.

"We could fire devils trap bullets at her again. That worked last time." Dean suggested. He didn't really know how they were gonna do this, but they had to. Cas had made a deal.

"That's not going to foil her this time Dean. We need a better plan than that." Sam replied with a sigh. There was no way she would fall for that trick again.

"I am sure Crowley has a way to weaken her so that I can smite her." Castiel interrupted calmly. He had learnt long ago to never put anything past Crowley, and they had agreed to do this together. He must have something to input into the fight, he was the king of hell after all.

"Okay, so with Crowley's help we kill Abaddon, hopefully, what next? I mean you need an angel to help you re-open the gates of hell, who are you going to ask?" Sam replied deciding that the battle against Abaddon couldn't really be laid out without knowing what Crowley's input would be.

"I don't know. All I can think is sending out an all angel broadcast asking for assistance." Castiel replied with a shrug. He knew it was a long shot, but he hoped if he could explain the situation to his brothers and sisters they would help him return them to their home.

"But Cas, they want to kill you." Dean interrupted. He really didn't like the idea of Cas siding with another angel.

"I am sure whoever comes will not kill me when they take my grace. I am sure that they will save me." Castiel replied placidly. He liked to think his brothers and sisters would do that for him. It was part of the angel tablet after all, that he live among humanity and work with those trying to save them. That to him meant he spent his life as a human with the Winchesters, something he was very ready to do. Surely whoever answered his call would see that.

"Wait, what? They could kill you by taking your grace?" Dean asked sitting up straight as he worked out just what Cas was saying.

"Yes. It requires them to slit my throat and take it from me. If they do not heal the cut I will die. But the tablet says I must live, so I am sure they will make sure I do so." Castiel replied with a smile for the man next to him understanding that it would be hard for him to hear this fact. He had thought of keeping it from Dean, but he had learnt through recent events that secrets served no one.

"Oh hell no. I am not letting you trust just any angel dick-bag with wings that comes along with that." Dean stated resolutely. He would not risk losing the one he loved, even if it did mean heaven stayed shut. He didn't give a crap. Cas was far more important than any of that shit.

"I'm sure we can do an interview process, trapping them in oil before we get them to do it." Sam interjected trying to elevate Dean's fears. If they could explain to whatever angel that answered Cas' call what needed to happen, surely they wouldn't kill the guy out of spite, right?

"Fine. But we're not doing this unless we're certain." Dean begrudgingly conceded. He knew that Cas felt he needed to open heaven as a way of making up for what he had done, but that didn't mean he had to give up his life. Dean wouldn't let that happen, no matter what.

"Of course Dean." Castiel responded understanding Dean's resistance to this plan. He understood it now more than he ever had. After all he now had something to lose. Someone he loved that he wanted to come back to.

And Sam sitting watching them prayed to god that it would all go well. That they would manage to kill Abaddon without any of them losing their lives, and that Cas would be able to open heaven and return to his brother. Because if the outcome was anything different he dreaded to think what any of them would do to rectify it. What Cas would do if Dean were slain when fighting Abaddon, what Dean would do if Cas was killed for his grace. No those outcomes could not happen. Because he knew that if they did the other would do all in their power to bring the one they loved back. Just as he also knew that if they put their mind to it, Dean and Cas could call forth a power that would affect the world. They had seen it before, with Cas opening purgatory and Dean setting the stage for the start of the apocalypse. No, they all needed to get out of this alive, it was the only way to end the creasing hell they kept putting on this earth. The only way they could end all that they had, together, done.


	48. Chapter 48

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Guest, TsukiyomiMidori (Guest), AngelisticSatan, Perdition Raiser, littleflor1 and giawinchester for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank all of you who have followed and favoured this story since my last update. You are all awesome.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

The days past in the bunker and everyone settled into an alert yet relaxed state, waiting for Crowley to call with information on Cas' grace. Dean and Cas spent most of their time together in their room, not only having sex, but just being with each other, while Sam and Kevin spent their time in the library researching anything that could be helpful in the two fights they had coming up.

It was a week after Sam had wanted to plan that Dean got a call. He was lying fully clothed on his bed with Cas sharing sweet kisses interspersed with the occasional random conversation and a lot of comfortable silences defined by intense staring, when they were interrupted by his ring tone.

Sitting up Dean grabbed his cell from his bedside table he saw the number which flashed up, 666. It was Crowley.

"Hey Crowley, you got Cas' grace?" He asked without any preamble. He did not want to have small talk with the king of hell.

"You know squirrel you could be a bit more polite. I have expended a great deal of energy searching for the less-feathered one's essence." Crowley replied amiably knowing that by not answering Dean's question he would no doubt annoy the man. He did love winding up Dean.

"Yeah great, good for you. You got it or what?" Dean asked with a growl. He didn't want to hear Crowley's crap right then. This was the event he had been dreading for the past week, even if he knew they needed it. The time when it was once more in Cas' power to become an angel. When he would have another choice than be with him. Not that he thought Cas would leave him, but still, there was a niggle of a doubt at the back of his mind at the idea of Cas wanting to give up his grace, willingly, for him. He wasn't sure he could believe it would happen. Not to mention the fight with Abaddon they would be having before that. The fight which he knew could go either way, even with an angel and the king of hell on their side. Then there was the whole Cas could die crap. No he really wasn't sure he wanted them to find Cas' grace at all.

"No, I don't have it." Crowley replied with a roll of his eyes. Fine business it was then.

"Then why the hell ya calling me? Go and freakin' well get it you son of a bitch." Dean responded narrowing his eyes at his phone even if Crowley couldn't see him, though his pissed off tension did ease somewhat when Castiel moved to sit behind him and wrapped him gently in his arms and started to feather gentle kisses down his neck, giving him the strength, or at least giving him a distraction so he didn't explode at the demon on the other end of the line.

"I can't get it Dean. It's protected by a spell and I can't enter, but I know where it is." Crowley said with exasperation in his voice at Dean's behaviour. Not that he expected less from the man.

"Fine where is it?" Dean asked in a calmer tone. If they knew the location they could go and grab it and they wouldn't need to interact with Crowley at all. That would be good, maybe then they could just ignore the whole killing Abaddon plan and get on with finding some douche of an angel to help Cas open heaven. Not that he liked that plan any more than the other one.

"In a library." Crowley replied. He then proceeded to give Dean the town and name before hanging up. He had considered insisting on going with them, to make sure they stuck to the plan, but the idea of sitting in that bloody car with the Winchesters and Castiel was just too much for him. Instead he made sure he would be able to track there journey through Dean's GPS. Yes that would be much easier, meet them there, then there was no way they could go back on their word.

When Dean had got the intel from Crowley and he hung up he leant back in Cas' arms so he could look into the former angel's eyes and rest his head on Cas' shoulder.

"We should tell Sam and get ready to go." Castiel said smiling reassuringly at Dean when he saw the conflict in the other man's eyes. The war between what Dean wanted and what he knew he had to do. He knew Dean was worried about what was to come, worried he would die, but he had faith that that would not come to pass. He had faith they would all survive this, and at least if he had his grace when they fought Abaddon and anything happened to Dean or Sam he would be able to heal them once more. Yes, that gave him comfort, knowing that no matter what Dean would survive that fight.

"Yeah, I guess." Dean replied smiling in return to Cas. He knew he couldn't put off what was about to happen, even if he wanted to. Even if he wanted nothing more than to stay here in their cocoon of happiness and let the outside world burn. He knew he couldn't. That wasn't what Winchester's did, that wasn't what he did. They had to go and save the world, again.

Moving out to the library they told Sam of the call and it was no more than half an hour later that the three of them were in the impala heading down the road towards the location Crowley had given them, rock music blaring from the stereo as Sam researched where they were going in the passenger seat and Castiel sat, seemingly relaxed, in the back, though his mind was in turmoil as questions and thoughts travelled through him as they moved ever closer to their destination.

They were going to the place that held his grace, the place where he would once more become an angel. He wasn't sure how he felt about that. He may not have been human for long, but he liked it. Liked being with Dean and eating and experiencing things he never thought he would. And though of course he knew academically he would not be an angel for long, he would soon be human again and this time by his own choice, still thoughts and questions whirled around his head due to what would happen at the end of this journey. How would it feel to have his grace back? To go back to how he was before now he knew what he did? Would his feelings for Dean still be as strong as they seemed right then? Would he still want him on a primal, animalistic level as he did now? Or would his love become a more abstract thing when his grace was once more inside him? Castiel did not know the answers to any of these questions, but he did know that it wouldn't be long before he found out. Before he got his answers. He just hoped that if having his grace did affect his feelings, not the love he had for Dean he knew nothing could change that, but if getting his grace back affected how he felt that love, that Dean would not be hurt by it. No he would make sure that even if he was an angel once more Dean knew he loved him. Because he had loved him for so long, surely his grace returning would not change the realisation he had had as a human. Surely nothing could change the feelings he had for his human. Surely it would still be the same, he would still feel the same, still want the same things from Dean as he did now. And just because he had never felt true sexual attraction as an angel for anyone, that did not mean he couldn't, right?


	49. Chapter 49

**Hello my darlings. I would like thank** **Raheem, Perdition Raiser, AngelisticSatan, giawinchester,** **spnfankat81 and Castielholmeshasthephonebox** **for the lovely reviews.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

The impala pulled up outside the library only to find Crowley waiting for them. Dean swore under his breath at seeing the king of hell. It seemed they wouldn't be getting out of that fight after all.

"You took your time." Crowley said in way of greeting. He could see Dean's glare directed at him and he knew just what he was thinking. Bypass the whole killing Abaddon thing and get down to returning the angels to heaven. But he was not having that. He was the king of hell and he and Castiel had made a deal. And this one would go much better than the last, of that he was sure.

"Yeah well, you know, long drive and all that." Dean sneered at him, using his go to defence so he didn't have to deal with the feelings inside him of finally arriving here.

"Well on you go. I'll wait out here for you to return." Crowley replied moving to lean against Dean's car and cross his arms. He knew that the man would not go anywhere without the impala, therefore so as long as he stayed beside it, they would go nowhere without him.

"Fine." Dean replied pushing his shoulders back before taking a deep breath and checking he had his gun on him. He knew it wouldn't do anything against angels, but he always felt better when armed. With that he turned to Sam and Cas to make sure they were with him before he started forwards. He had a faint hope that the spell that kept Crowley out would also keep them from entering the building, though he knew that was more a fantasy than anything else. If only he had a legitimate reason to never get Cas' grace back. Oh god how he would take it right then. Take anything to keep his man by his side and away from the danger that was to come. Of course that hope died when the three of them entered the library unaffected by whatever spell Metatron had put around the place.

"Cas, do you know where your grace is?" Sam asked as they entered the building. It would take days to search it all, he just hoped Cas had at least an idea where they would find that which they had come to collect.

"It's this way." Castiel replied with a frown on his face and a tilt of his head as if he was listening to something neither of the other two with him could hear.

"You sure?" Dean asked, though whether it was because he didn't want to search the whole of this friggin' place, or if he was hoping Cas didn't know, he had know idea.

"Yes. It's calling to me, like when I touch my hand print on your shoulder." Castiel replied moving purposefully through the shelves of books.

His words made Dean unconsciously touch the mark in question, he had never realised Cas had felt anything when he had touched it. Sure, thinking back it gave him a… something. A strength of feeling or a zap of emotion or whatever, but he had never really thought about the reasoning behind that. In fact he had never really thought about it at all.

Sam followed Cas into the books hoping to help him locate his grace, though he had no idea how, he just wanted to get things started. Get on with what was to come. They had sat around enough, it was time for the final battle, and he could feel it in his soul. That time had come.

* * *

Dean watched as Sam followed Cas and he knew he should join them, though what good he and Sam would be in locating angel grace he had no freakin' clue, what he did know was that he had to at least pretend to be supportive of the man he loved, show him he was happy to help, that he loved him, that there was a reason for him to come back to him. With that Dean moved off, though he went down a path parallel to the others, not wanting to see Cas' face when he found his grace.

As such as Cas searched with determination and Sam followed in him doggedly, Dean found himself looking at the books around him, reading he names on the spines though he wasn't really taking any of them in. Occasionally one would look interesting and he would take it from the shelf and open it, flick through the pages before he returned it. He was getting bored with all of this now, surely Cas should have been able to go straight to it and get this over with right? Become an angel again… Dean's eyes were suddenly caught by a book near the bottom of the shelf. He had no idea why, but he thought nothing of bending down and pulling it to him, opening it, intent on seeing what the pages had to say. But what he found when he opened the book was a lot more than he had bargained for. For their lying inside was a small bottle filled with swirling blue essence. He had found Cas' grace.

He stood there for a second as ideas went through his mind, because while he knew his first instinct should be to call out to the others that he had found it, something stopped him. Something that told him he could take it and put it in his pocket and no one would ever know. And Cas would never get his grace back, nothing would have to change, things would go on as they were. The temptation to do that oozed through his mind, making him think of the pleasure he could have with Cas at his side… No. If he did that the angels would still be on earth causing a shit-storm, and Abaddon would be still trying to make hell on earth. No matter how much he wanted to, for him, for Cas, he knew he couldn't put his feelings in front of the rest of the world. With a sigh he pulled the bottle from its snug position, letting the book fall to the floor as he called.

"Hey Cas, I've found it."

* * *

Castiel had been searching the shelves thoroughly, he could feel he was close, but he did not know where his grace was. At Dean's call he moved quickly, rounding the shelves only to stop short at the sight of Dean holding the bottle which contained his grace. It wasn't the fact he held it that caused him to pause, but more the image it represented to him. That Dean held in his hands his power. Dean held who he was and could do with it as he pleased. It was without doubt an image that resonated inside him, because he knew it was true, and not just the physical scene in front of him. Dean held him in his hands with his love. He was Dean's, nothing could change that. He knew that deep down now seeing that sight. Not even taking back his grace would change his love for the man in front of him.

At that realisation Castiel moved, not to take the bottle from Dean's hands but to place his hands either side of Dean's face and pull him towards him for a passion filled kiss. A kiss he hoped told Dean all he felt for him, all he would always feel for him, no matter what happened next.

"Oh for god's sake. Is now really the time for that?" Sam muttered moving round the shelves after Cas and seeing him and Dean in a passionate kiss. I mean seriously, hadn't they done enough of that over the last week? Did they really need to do it now too?

"Always time for that Sammy." Dean replied with a smirk when he and Cas broke from the kiss. Though his expression turned serious when he held the bottle out to the former angel in front of him.

"Thank you Dean." Castiel said taking it carefully from the man's hands and just looking at it for a second before he turned to the two Winchesters with him.

"You should move back." He said giving them only second or twos warning before he took the lid of the bottle and opened his mouth to let his grace flow back inside him, back to where it belonged, where it felt at home.

* * *

Dean stepped back quickly at Cas words but still he had to shield his eyes from the bright light that came with Cas regaining his grace. When it had dimmed enough for him to look he turned to see Cas, his blue eyes now shining bright with his grace, and there reflected on the walls were his wings, though they were not the wings Dean remembered seeing the first time he had met his angel. No, these wings were crumbled and destroyed, as if they had been burnt or torn away. The image in front of him made a lump appear in Dean's throat. The idea that anything could do that to the being in front of him. And looking at Cas' wings he knew, while he may well be an angel again, he wasn't the same angel who had pulled him from hell, he wasn't the angel who had stood beside him throughout all the crap they had been through. No. This was painful to see. The irrefutable proof that Cas was no longer the same as he had always been. It hurt him to see what had happened to one the loved. It hurt to know that there was nothing he could do to change his fate. And for all he had spent the last few days wishing that Cas never became an angel again, seeing what had become of his wings made he pledge to whoever was listening that he would avenge this pain caused to his Cas. No one would be safe from Dean Winchesters wrath, because no one hurt Cas and got anyway with it in his mind. Oh no, he was going to make them pay, and he would enjoy doing it. Metatron was a dead man, angel whatever, he was dead.


	50. Chapter 50

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank giawinchester and** **Castielholmeshasthephonebox** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured this story since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural, nor the lines to the song.**

* * *

' _Tell me that you'll open your eyes, Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

 _Tell me that you'll open your eyes, Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

 _Tell me that you'll open your eyes, Tell me that you'll open your eyes_

 _Tell me that you'll open your eyes, Tell me that you'll open your eyes'_

 _Open Your Eyes – Snow Patrol_

* * *

Castiel felt his grace course through him connecting with his soul, felt it flair out the wings he had almost forgotten how it felt to have, though he knew they were damaged. The power, it was extraordinary, it was strange, and yet it also felt like coming home. He finally felt whole once more in a way he hadn't even known he had been missing when he was human. It was too much, but it was also comfort… he had no real way to define what he was feeling being an angel again. It was so much more than he had thought it would be, but at the same time, so much less. His power was muted, it reminded him of the time he was cut off from heaven during the apocalypse, though not as bad as that. Still he knew he was not at his full strength, he was not the angel he had been before he and helped Metatron destroy it all.

Blinking as the grace faded into him, his eyes returning to their normal blue and his wings vanishing from sight he turned to Dean to see a hard look on his face directed towards him. For a second he wondered if it was because he was an angel again, that maybe Dean felt that this would change things between them, even if he now knew it would not. He could feel his love for Dean just as it had been before he had become an angel, back when he was human. He opened his mouth to hopefully alleviate Dean's worry's but then he realised he wasn't looking at him so much as at the wall where his wings had been reflected. Of course. Dean had seen them before, had seen them in all their glory after he had pulled him from hell. No doubt he was disgusted by what had come of them through his own actions. It made Castiel feel ashamed and a little bit embarrassed about having the Winchesters see them in such a state.

"They are the result of closing heaven." He muttered not wanting to look Dean in the eye to see him look at him with failure and disgust.

"I'm gonna kill Metatron." Was Dean's growled response. He was trying hard to keep his temper in check. He could see that Cas was upset and he wanted to go to him, tell him it was alright and everything would be fine, but all he could think of was the pain he would cause that dick - with on doubt perfect - wings.

"Dean you cannot." Castiel replied looking up at that. Dean was not ashamed of him then, but being his protective self. That idea made a small smile appear on his face even if Dean did narrow his eyes at his words.

"Give me one good reason." Dean spat. He knew if Metatron had been in front of him right then he would have happily sliced the guy to ribbons and enjoyed watching him burn.

"Well for one, he is heaven and there is no way of getting there." Castiel replied with quirk of his lips. He refrained from mentioning that Metatron was an angel and Dean would stand no chance against him. He knew that would do nothing more than provoke the man he loved.

"Look, let's deal with that later, right? I mean we have Crowley waiting outside." Sam interrupted not sure why Dean was so pissed, but now as not the time. They had things they needed to do.

"Fine." Dean replied with a nod even if his body was still tense for the fight he desperately wanted to have.

"Dean, we will kill Abaddon, and then we will return the angels to heaven. They will deal with Metatron as they see fit. We do not need to worry about him. I will not be an angel for long anyway." Castiel said moving so he was once more standing in Dean's personal space and he could lay a hand on his cheek and stare into his amazingly gorgeous green eyes.

"Okay." Dean replied with a sigh letting the tension leave his body as he stared into the blue eyes of his angel. He and Sam were right, they had things to do, but Dean would not give up on this, and if he ever got the chance to kill that douche, he would do it without hesitation or question. If Metatron ever showed his ugly face on earth again he would die.

With that Castiel smiled and gave Dean a gentle kiss, enjoying the way his grace seemed to hum at the connection with his human. Enjoying the way it reached out for Dean, reached out for the residue amounts of grace he had left infused with his soul. It made him see and feel their kiss in a whole new light, and Castiel could not wait to see what having his grace would do for their sex life. not that it wasn't good when he was human, it had been amazing, he just had the idea that now he had his grace once more, was an angel once more, well, he thought now it would be… a revelation.

* * *

Leaving the library, Dean and Castiel hand in hand following Sam, they found Crowley exactly where they left him, making Dean frown at how causally he was leaning against his baby. He would prefer the king of hell stayed away from her.

"Well, well. It looks like feathers has got his wings back." Crowley smirked when he saw Castiel, taking note of angel he saw in front of him rather than the human he had seen enter the building.

"I have." Castiel agreed with a nod not letting go of Dean.

"Then it seems we have a knight of hell to kill. The perfect way to spend an afternoon if you ask me." Crowley responded looking very much like a cat who had got all the cream.

"I do not have the power to smite her Crowley, we need a plan." Castiel replied narrowing his eyes at the demon. He would not rush into this, especially as he knew that Dean and Sam would come with them. They needed to make sure that they organised everything so that no one got hurt, or at least no one got killed.

"Fine with me." Crowley shrugged. He wasn't stupid enough to run into this fight without a plan. Just as long as everyone knew that that was what they would be doing next.

"Why don't we move this conversation to somewhere more private?" Sam suggested looking up and down the street. It may be quiet, but it would be better to take this elsewhere in his mind.

"Agreed." Crowley nodded before he teleported himself into the back seat of the impala with a smug grin on his face. There was no way the Winchesters and their pet angel would be getting rid of him until Abaddon was dead, they had better get used to the idea.

Dean growled at seeing Crowley in the back seat, but he didn't say anything as he went to the driver's side, though he did find it rather surreal to look into the rear-view mirror and to see an angel and demon sitting next to each other. What the hell had happened to his world that this seemed perfectly normal?

* * *

Sam directed Dean to a motel on the outskirts of town, both the Winchesters would need to sleep after all, even if their passengers didn't. It would also give them a private place to come up with a plan.

With the location decided Dean started his baby, pulling away from the library and heading out to start the next phase of saving the world. Son of bitch, when were they ever gonna get a break?


	51. Chapter 51

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Perdition Raiser, Katerinaelizabethallan and giawinchester for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it, I might have played a bit with things, you'll see.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

The impala arrived at the motel and Sam went and got two rooms, though they all went to Dean and Cas' as it was bigger. Once inside Sam made his way to the bed, resolutely not thinking about what his brother and the angel would be doing on it later as he sat down and pulled open his laptop. Time to see if he could find anything more about killing a knight of hell, even if he had researched the subject to death.

Dean on the other hand moved to pull a beer from the pack he had brought in with him, he felt he would need it with what was to come. And then he went to stand so he was leaning against the chest of draws which held the TV, directly opposite his brother. Cas and Crowley interspersed themselves between the Winchesters so they were at the other two points of the square.

"So how do we gank this bitch? Devils trap bullets to the head then you smite her?" He asked turning to Cas hoping it would be that simple, though he doubted very much it would be. He didn't really have many ideas, mainly cos be had been trying not to think about when Cas got his grace back or anything that would come after that.

"Do you really think she'll fall for that again? Just how stupid are you squirrel?" Crowley answered before Castiel could even get a word out making Dean turn to him with narrowed eyes.

"And what ideas you got you dick? Or are you just here to make snide remarks." Dean growled. He did not need this shit, not now not ever.

"I know a spell, a hex bag that will kill a normal demon, it should weaken Abaddon enough for feathers here to do his thing." Crowley replied in a deceptively casual tone as if he was commenting on the weather, even if his words did make both Sam and Castiel's eyes swing to him.

"Then why don't you go get on that?" Dean replied not really listening. He didn't care what Crowley did, but he would prefer he didn't do it here, in fact he would prefer if Sam left as well. He wanted some quality time with his angel. He needed to make sure he was still his angel in all senses of the words.

"Didn't I just say it weakened demons? If you forget squirrel I am the king of hell. Being a demon is one of the prerequisites." Crowley replied with a roll of his eyes before turning his eyes to Sam, though he still spoke to Dean. "If the moose here will lend me his oversized hands I'm sure we can make it up."

"Okay, umm, what are the ingredients? I'll see where we can find them." Sam replied surprised by his sudden inclusion in this conversation. Sure he had dabbled in witchcraft, but he had never done anything as powerful as Crowley was suggesting. He just hoped they could make it work, and then work out how to get it to Abaddon.

"I am the king of hell Samuel. The ingredients are not an issue." Crowley responded his tone dripping with condensation for the idiotic humans.

"Right, okay. How do you know about this spell? I've never heard of such a thing." Sam asked instead. If there was nothing he could do, then at least he could find out more about the law they were using.

"Call it a family recipe, leave it at that." Crowley replied with in absolute voice. There was no way he would be sharing that little secret with those here. After all he tried his hardest to pretend his mother had never existed, he would prefer that everyone else thought that as well.

"So how we gonna get this family secret into the hands of a knight of hell?" Dean asked in the silence that was greeted by Crowley's words. He really didn't care about the demons family. He was only interested in finding a plan that would gank Abaddon without Cas getting hurt.

"if one of us shoots her with devil trap bullets getting her attention, then the other one can sneak up behind her and place it in her pocket maybe?" Sam suggested. He knew it was lame, and probably wouldn't work, but it was all he could think of.

"Oh please." Crowley muttered with a roll of his eyes. Why had he asked for these bloody idiots help again?

"If myself and Crowley distract her, then I believe one of you will be able to sneak up on her to place the hex bag. Then I can smite her while stabbing her with my angel blade. That should kill her." Castiel suggested entering the conversation for the first time. He had been trying to think of a plan that did not involve the Winchesters, but he had come up with nothing. Of course even if he had thought of one, he knew Dean would not let him go without him. He would insist on being his backup, being there for him if he needed it.

Oh yes, that was why he asked for their help. There was one not so stupid among them, even if he was an angel. "Well that could work feathers, and it's the best idea we have." Crowley replied with a nod. He was sure he and Castiel could come up with ways to keep Abaddon's attention on them rather than the insignificant humans with them.

"Great, so why don't you and Sam go make your little spell, hex bag whatever, and we'll see you in the morning." Dean responded deciding that was the best they were gonna get that night, and he wanted to be alone with Cas.

"It's not something I can make up in this place squirrel. I think it would be best if we do that at your secret base." Crowley replied with a roll of his eyes. What did he think they were making, a bloody Victoria sponge?

"You really think I'm gonna let you into there?" Dean asked with disbelief. There was no way he was ever gonna let Crowley inside the bunker. No way in hell.

"Why not? You summon me and I'll never know exactly whereabouts it is in the 20 mile circle outside Lebanon that I can't track you." Crowley replied with a smug look that Dean really wanted to remove from his face.

"Fine, we'll summon when we get back. Now I think it's time to sleep." Sam interjected seeing the look on his brother's face. He didn't want Dean to do anything he would regret, no correct that, he just really didn't want his brother doing anything right then.

With that he closed his laptop and moved towards the door only to find Crowley not moving.

"Castiel and I can talk about the plan while you boys sleep." Crowley suggested with a smirk. Oh he knew full well that the angel and Dean wanted him gone, he was just wondering how they would go about it getting rid of him.

"I'm afraid I have other plans for the evening Crowley. We can talk when you come to the bunker." Castiel said with finality. He wanted to be with Dean, to show Dean he still loved. To find out what having his grace would do to their love making.

Crowley looked at the angel and realised that that was one fight he probably didn't want to pick just for his own amusement. So instead he made sure he got the last word in before he left.

"If you wish. Call me."

Once Crowley was gone Sam continued his journey out the door, leaving Castiel and Dean to stand there starting at each other.

That last for about half a second before they both moved grabbing at each trying to reassure themselves and the one they loved that Castiel becoming an angel again did not affect their feelings in any way. Their clothes were shed in quick and almost desperate actions, their lips barely leaving each other's as they moved towards the bed. Once there Castiel pushed Dean down, following him without thought as their hands moved to the places they had learnt gave the other the most pleasure. It did not take long for Castiel to make Dean ready for him. He wanted him so badly, and he may have used a little of his grace to spend up the process.

Therefore not long after they were alone Castiel found himself buried deep inside Dean once more and he finally found he could breathe. Finally found he could slow the frantic pace that had held the pair of them as they tried to reassert their feelings for one another. Lifting of the man below him he moved his hand so he could stroke Dean's cheeks in a loving gesture and he pushing slowly into him. Moving gently and lovingly, and in a way determined to tease his man.

"Cas…" Dean begged below him as he stared up into the blue eyes which were still the same as the one he had looked into that morning. They still held the same emotions and this was still the same person he loved, whether he had his grace or not. Dean knew that, looking into Cas' eyes he knew that deep in his soul. All the way down to their more profound bond.

"Dean…" Castiel mimicked with a smile. He knew what Dean wanted, but he wanted to take a minute to just enjoy what they had together. To enjoy their love for each other. Before he discovered what having his grace would change about this aspect of their relationship. He wanted to reaffirm to himself that having Dean below him, like this, was all he wanted. And looking down into those gorgeous begging green eyes he knew it really was.

With that Castiel moved. Changed his position so he could hammer into Dean hard and fast just as his man wanted it, and when he knew they were both close to organism he moved his hand so he once again clasped Dean's shoulder where his handprint was seared into his skin. The effect was immediate and intense. Dean arched up off of the bed moaning his name as he came at the intensity of the feeling Cas' grace connecting with that inside him as the angel moved into him, while Castiel eyes flashed blue and images of his wings appeared on the ceiling as he called Dean and found a pleasure he had never known existed until right then.

It really was the revelation Castiel had thought it would be, and knew he would be doing that as much as he could before he had to give his grace away. For however much pleasure both he and Dean gained from him being an angel, it was a novelty, it would not be forever. He would be human soon, and he knew that the pleasure they experienced then would be enough for the both of them. Because if came from the knowledge that they could be together forever.


	52. Chapter 52

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank horsegirl2430, giawinchester and Raheem** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have favoured and followed since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, it's a long one. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

The journey back to the bunker was consumed by conversations. The first was where they would summon Crowley, Sam suggested the dungeon as it had a devils trap and therefore would make sure Crowley did not get a look at anything else in the place. But Dean vetoed that straight away on the excuse he did not want the demon knowing the way out of that place, just in case they ever had cause to put him in there. He was pretty sure that if they summoned Crowley there he would claim he and Sam couldn't work whatever magic they would be doing in such a place and therefore would need to be let out. He would prefer to keep the dungeons location a secret, for now. Castiel of course did not say anything, though he did wonder if he should mention that Crowley already knew of its existence as he had summoned him to it before, but he decided that that did not have any bearing on this particular conversation, he would tell Dean later, much later.

It was finally decided that they would summon Crowley into the main library, they had to show a sign of good faith if they were going to work with the guy after all. Of course that raised another issue in Dean's mind.

"What we gonna do with Kevin?" He asked as he drove. He wasn't stupid. He knew that Crowley would love the chance to get his hands on the prophet again, but there was no way Dean was letting that happen. Then of course there was Kevin's deep desires to kill the bastard, not that Dean blamed him for that one. He had killed his mom after all.

So then they discussed what to do with the other resident of the bunker, before finally settling on the idea of letting him take a holiday. If they and Cas warded a hotel room against, well pretty much everything, then surely he would be fine. Leave him with food and drink and access to porn, Dean was sure the kid would do okay. Sam agreed though he thought they should probably give him others things as well as porn, after all you really can only watch so much, even if Dean disagreed with that idea, that was his brother, and he was a little weird in his mind.

Therefore when they returned to the bunker the first thing they did was get Kevin out. Telling him he needed a break from all the work he had been doing. The prophet was more than happy to go along with that. he had read so much law, and been trying to translate the angel tablet so much, he felt his eyes were going crossed. He didn't even question the idea, he was that keen. Didn't even think that there could be another reason they wanted him out of their home.

And so once Kevin was settled in a nice hotel in a nearby town, both Sam and Dean thinking Lebanon was a little too close to home, they returned to the bunker to prepare for the king of hells arrival. This preparation included drawing devils traps on the floor of every exit from the library so Crowley could go no further into the bunker, and a schedule being drawn up of who would watch over the demon when. Though Sam did suggest Cas watch over him when he and Dean were sleeping, that idea did not go down well with the other two. It seemed they both had other plans for their nights together, and Sam really didn't want to get into an argument about it. Mainly because he knew if he did Dean would proceed to tell him exactly what their plans were, in excruciating detail. And that was something he really did not want to know.

Therefore the stage was set and they were as ready as they would ever be for their latest house guest. Or at least it almost was. There was one more thing in Dean's mind that they needed to do before they brought Crowley into their home.

"Cas, come with me a minute would you?" he said gesturing to the angel who was finalising some warding's.

"Of course Dean, what is it?" Castiel asked moving without question to follow the man he loved to their room.

Once they were both inside Dean closed the door before he moved to his bed and reached underneath it pulling out a box.

"I couldn't throw this away, I never could. but whatever, this belongs to you." He said opening the box and pulling out the tattered and blood stained trench coat the angel had always worn. He held it out to Cas, just as he had once before when he had thought the angel lost, and he said nothing more. It was without doubt the universal signature of the angel in front of him. And now he had his grace back, he needed to have his coat on once more. No matter what else had changed, between them and in Cas' own mind, as an angel he had to wear his coat.

Castiel looked at the beige bundle in Dean's hands and he knew exactly what it was. He couldn't believe the man had kept, but then again, he had before, so maybe he should not be so surprised. Taking from Dean with a smile he shook it out to see the blood of his sister staining it. But he knew he could fix that. Just as he also knew if he was to once again wear this coat, to once again become the angel Castiel in this sense, he could not wear it over the jeans and plaid shirt he had on at present. That was human Castiel, this coat was angel Castiel. If he was to be angel Castiel, he would do it properly. Thus he placed the coat on the bed and without a word went to their wardrobe and pulled out his FBI suit. Not looking at Dean as he did it he changed into the black trousers and white shirt, but before he pulled on the jacket he walked round to his own side of the bed and pulled out his own box, which was smaller than the one Dean had. Opening it he exacted the only thing it contained. His blue tie. Turning to the mirror he put it on. Not the way you should put on a tie, but he put it on so if fell slightly backwards and was loose around his neck. That done he put on his jacket and then pulled on the trench coat, cleaning it as he did so. With his look complete he turned to Dean and held out his hands as he had done when he returned from purgatory, asking his man what he thought.

"Hey Cas." Was all Dean said with a smile. He couldn't think of anything else to say, because there in front of him was the angel of the lord who had pulled him from hell. The angel of the lord he had fallen in love with. There was so much he wanted to say, he just didn't have the words for it.

"Hello Dean." Castiel replied in his deep voice smiling at the other man before moving so he could kiss him. after all he may well now be dressed as the angel he once was, that didn't stop him from loving the man who had saved his coat for no other reason than it represented what he had been. He may not be the same angel as the one who had worn this coat last, but he was still the same being.

After the kiss and Dean laughingly trying to fix Cas' tie, not that the angel would let him, they returned to the library and to Sam who was waiting for them. When he saw Cas he had to do a double take, because this was not the guy who had been living with them, this was the angel. His clothing affirmed in Sam's mind what he knew to be truth. Cas was an angel once more.

"Let's get this over with shall we?" Dean asked with a smirk at his brother's reaction. Oh yeah, Cas was back, for now.

With that the three of them summoned the kill of hell.

"Well you took your time about it, let me guess, you were hiding away the prophet boy and protecting your home from little old me. I feel honoured that you went to such trouble." Crowley said with a smirk as he arrived with a bag in hand. Though then he took note of what Castiel was wearing. "Well hello again feathers, I see you are back to your old self."

"I am better than that Crowley." Castiel replied with a smile as he cast his eyes to Dean and back again. Yes he was much better than the old angel Castiel, because this angel had love.

"Just get on with making the spell Crowley. Let's get this over with." Dean interrupted narrowing his eyes at the demon. He didn't trust him in their home, though he knew they had done what they could, and while Cas won't be watching over Crowley when Dean slept, he knew the angel would be alert for anything the demon would do in that time.

"Gladly. I want our working relationship over as much as you do squirrel." Crowley replied with a smile, daring Dean to ask if that meant what he thought it did. That at the end of their fight with Abaddon then the human would be free of the deal they had made. Though surely Dean knew he was already free, surely he knew that Castiel loved him, and that was what it was for after all.

Dean stared at Crowley when he said those words wondering, but he knew that was not something he was gonna ask in front of his brother or Cas. They had finally sorted out what he had done, sorted out how the deal he made with Crowley effected them. He was not about to raise it again now.

"Right, so how do we make this hex bag?" Sam asked deciding to get down to business. The sooner they had it made, the sooner they could kill Abaddon. And then it was one down, one to go. But he would think about the angel crap later, one thing at a time, and right now he had other things he needed to do.

"Let me show you. It is complicated magic moose, and you do not have the power to do it. But I do. I'm sure together we can make it work." Crowley replied moving towards the table and placing the bag he had with him down on it.

"Okay." Sam muttered. Well that sentence really filled him with confidence, not. But they really didn't have any other choice.

Seeing Sam and Crowley occupied Castiel took Dean's hand and pulled him towards the door.

"what ya doin' Cas?" Dean muttered, though he had a pretty good idea, he just wasn't sure he wanted to leave his brother with the king of hell.

"Well Sam and Crowley are busy, I thought we could be too." Castiel murmured into Dean's ear as they reached the exit which lead to the bedrooms.

"You don't think we should stay and keep an eye on them?" Dean asked, though he didn't resist as Cas pulled him down the corridor towards there room. He was all for making love with his angel again. It had been so mind-blowing since Cas had got his grace back and he, like the angel, wanted to experience it as much as they could before the time came when Cas gave away that part of him. Not that Dean liked to think about that time, because that was the time when Cas could die, and that was not something he would ever let enter his mind. He would not lose Cas.

"They will be fine. But I feel I definitely need you to keep an eye on me." Castiel purred as the reached their bedroom door and he opened it before pushing Dean inside.

"Oh yeah? Why's that?" Dean asking smirking at the angel stepping away from him with twinkling eyes.

"I have this strange feeling Dean, I am hoping you can help me understand it." Castiel replied as he moved closer to Dean, he was happy to his game if that was what Dean wished.

"What is it? I'll do my best." Dean responded trying to keep a straight face but knowing he instead smiled sultry at his angel. He couldn't not. I mean he was Cas, and he was his. How could he ever look at him in any other way?

"I feel the need of physical contact." Castiel replied raising his hands so they rested on Dean's hips, but did not pull him towards him. Letting Dean have his fun for now, he would have his own soon enough.

"Oh? Where? Here by any chance?" Dean asked reaching for Cas' tie and using it to pull him to him for a kiss. It was strange, he had never thought of doing this before, but now, with Cas standing before him dressed as he was, he could think of nothing more he wanted to do than use that blue tie in this way.

"That is definitely one of the places." Castiel growled lowly when they separated so Dean could breathe. He was enjoying this playing.

"Anywhere else Cas? Here perhaps?" Dean asked sinking to his knees and running his hands over Cas' erection which was straining against his pants.

"Yes, Dean, definitely there." Castiel moaned looking down at the green eyed man on his knees before him. It was a sight he would never tire of.

"Well, then. I think I need to rectify that." Dean replied before quickly opening Cas' pants and pulling his cock out so he could lick around its tip before he took it into his mouth, not taking his eyes from the blue ones he loved so much as he proceeded to do everything he knew that would tease, would insight pleasure, everything he knew Cas loved and caused the angel to lose control.

But Castiel was made of sterner stuff than Dean gave him credit for, helped by the fact he had his grace back. He enjoyed every one of Dean's ministrations, but not once did he give the man in front of him the power. No, his control now was much more than it had been when he was human.

Dean may not have caused Cas to lose control, to cause him to grab him and slam him on the bed, but he had certainly made himself want nothing more than that. Who knew that he could make himself so desperate to have his angel inside him just by giving him a blow job? Taking his lips and tongue from Cas' cock he sat back on his heals as he spoke in a breathless voice.

"Make love to me Cas." he begged. He knew he was doing it and he didn't care. This was him and Cas, and this was what they did.

"Happily Dean." Castiel replied pulling him up from the floor so he was in front of him. Castiel then proceeded to remove Dean's clothes at a slow and languid pace, making sure to kiss and suckle and bite at the parts of Dean's body as he exposed them, making the human tremble with need. Once he was done striping Dean he stood back, preparing to remove his own clothing.

"No Cas. Keep them one, keep the coat one." Dean whispered moving to stop him and pulling him in for a passionate, desperate kiss.

"If you wish Dean." Castiel responded with a smirk of pleasure at the idea to taking Dean naked while he was fully clothed. And not just in any clothes, but these clothes. The clothes of his angelic self. Pushing Dean back onto their bed Castiel followed him down positioning himself to enter his man.

"Um Cas? You need to prep me." Dean said, suddenly realising that Cas seemed to have decided to skip that part. And however much he wanted Cas inside him, he really wasn't up for the pain that would come from them dry fucking.

"Dean I am an angel. That means I have the power to manipulate your body however I choose, I do not need lubrication to make you ready for me." Castiel replied pushing himself into Dean in one smooth pain free stroke.

"Well that's definitely an upside." Dean uttered as he arched his back at the pleasure he felt. He had been prepared for pain, he should have known Cas would never hurt him.

At that Dean wrapped one hand in Cas' tie once more, pulling him down for a kiss as he grabbed the lapel of his coat with the other. Oh yeah. This was awesome. And with that Castiel proceeded to ride Dean, taking him on a long slow journey to pleasure, milking all the sounds he could from the man below him.

And Dean, he just lay back and revelled in the feel of Cas' clothes against his skin, the way his tie teased his chest, and how his coat skimmed his sides. And through it all he kept his eyes on the angel above him. The angel who had saved him from hell, the angel who had sided with him over his family, and the angel who had done everything he could to protect him. The angel he loved.

When it was over, their pleasure having reached the stars, Castiel cleaned them both up with a thought before he removed his clothes and climbed into bed next to the man he loved. Just a simple human, wanting to hold the one he had just found the most amazing earthly pleasure with in his arms. Because he knew when deep down that was all he was. One who wanted to be with the one he loved always.


	53. Chapter 53

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank giawinchester, TsukiyomiMidori (Guest), Castielholmeshasthephonebox and horsegirl2430 for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured this story since my last update. I love you all.**

 **Anyway here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Crowley watched Dean and Castiel disappear out a door, and he guessed that was the direction of the bedrooms. Smirking he turned to the remaining Winchester as he spoke, "seems squirrel and feathers are enjoying themselves, what about you moose, found yourself a nice girl to fuck yet? Or maybe one who isn't so nice? I know you have a thing for the bad girls after all."

"Shut up Crowley and tell me what you want me to do." Sam growled, he was not going to discuss his love life, or lack of, with Crowley, nor was he going to discuss Cas and Dean. The only reason the demon was here was so they could make this hex bag and sooner it was done, the sooner they could get him out of their lives for good.

"Very well if you insist love, but just so you know, I know some women who I'm sure would be more than happy to pleasure you… or if you would prefer, I'm available. I think you would look perfectly wonderful in a tight bustier, tidied down on a bed." Crowley replied with glee in his voice as he gained the most perfect bitchface from Sam. Oh yes this was so much fun and there was no Dean to stop him from winding up the moose. Though he should probably get him working rather than pissing him up. Shame, but that was life. With that he turned to business and the bag he had brought with him. "I have all the ingredients in here, but you need to prepare them correctly. So moose firstly we must…" and with that Crowley went on to tell Sam exactly what to do, in the most condensing and excruciatingly painful way possible. Or at least it was for Sam who was already on the verge of hitting the dick. By the end of it he was ready to jam an angel blade into him, but he didn't. He just let himself fantasize about doing it will he got all the ingredients ready as per Crowley's instructions.

It was quite a while later that both Crowley and Sam heard footsteps approaching the room, and though Sam didn't look up, he was concentrating on what he was doing, Crowley did with a smirk on his face as he watched Cas and Dean return, the former with his hair a lot more messy than it had been, while the latter took one look at him and turned bright red. Oh that was a classic. He opened his mouth to say something that would make Dean even more uncomfortable but before he could get the words out Dean spoke.

"Hey Sammy, I'm gonna make some dinner, burgers good for you?"

"Ooh yes. I would love a burger squirrel, thank you so much for asking." Crowley replied before Sam could get a word out, gaining him two identical glares from the Winchester brothers.

"I'll be in the kitchen." Dean growled turning on his heels and leaving the room. The less time he spent with Crowley, Cas and Sam the better in his mind, though he did want to ask the demon about what he had meant earlier. About whether his deal with him was complete. He thought it probably was, but he wanted to make sure. Of course he also refused to ask that question in front of the other two people there, therefore he was just gonna have to wait until he could get the demon on his own. Putting these thoughts from his mind Dean turned to the job of cooking them all dinner. And forgetting that Cas didn't eat any more he made up enough burgers for the four of them.

* * *

"How is it going?" Castiel asked turning to Sam once Dean had left. He would have liked to follow his human, but he felt he should probably stay here and make sure Crowley was behaving himself. Of course by that logic he should have stayed previously rather than dragging Dean off. But considering he and Dean would be watching over Crowley while Sam slept, he really did not feel bad about wanting to spend some time making love to his man.

"Okay I think. Just finishing up here and then we'll be ready to assemble it." Sam replied sorting through the last pile of ingredients he had in front of him. Crowley had been very particular about the order he chose what they needed, he just hoped it was because it was required for the spell to work, and not just because the demon was taking the piss so he could spend longer here than was necessary.

"That is good… So tomorrow we will be fighting Abaddon." Castiel replied moving she was standing in a position where he could see what Sam was doing as well as watch Crowley, but also so he wasn't in the way.

"Yes feathers. You up for that?" Crowley responded with the raise of his eyebrow. He said it in his usual snarky voice, though he knew the question was one he would very much like the answer to.

"Are you?" Castiel asked in return. He would not justify Crowley's words with a proper answer. He had his grace back, and he was as powerful as any seraph was right now. But he knew he could not kill Abaddon on his own.

"Always darling." Crowley replied with a smirk before turning his eyes back to what Sam was doing. He just hoped he could make this work, after all his mother had never been one for actually teaching him her magic, he was just glad he had inherited something useful from the bitch. Or at least enough of it that he was sure he could make this do what it was supposed to. Maybe not as powerfully as she could, but it would be enough with an angel at his side. Of that he had no doubt.

The three of them descended into silence as Sam finished what he was doing and Castiel and Crowley watched on. There staring at him was enough to make him want to snap that them to stop, but another voice in his head, one that sounded surprisingly like his brothers, made him see the funny side of this. I mean here he was working on a way to kill a knight of hell, and he had the king of hell and an angel watching over him. How had his life come to this?

* * *

Dean worked methodically, refusing to think about what Sam was doing, or what would happen when he was done. No all he needed to think about right then was making dinner for everyone. That was his job. So when the burgers were finished and he made something that he decided was close enough that it could be described as a salad, he called to the people in the other room to come and help him bring it through. His call was answered by Castiel who smiled when he saw four plates of food. Of course Dean had made him dinner, just as he was used to doing. As such he made no comment on the fact he did not need to eat and instead grabbed two of the plates and couple of the beers Dean had opened taking them back to the library. Dean followed with the last two plates and beers.

* * *

It was a strange group that then sat down to eat at the other end of the table to the one Sam had been working. Dean sat at the head with Castiel on one side and Sam the other, while Crowley took his place next to the angel. He felt he was less likely to have Dean glare at him if he was sitting opposite Sam rather than next to the man.

And so they all sat down to eat, though as Dean bit into his burger he saw Cas take a small bite before placing his back on the plate.

"What's up Cas? I thought you liked burgers." He said wondering if there was something wrong with it. But it was the same as he always made them, and Cas had been eating them a lot when he was human.

"As an angel I do not need to eat Dean." Castiel reminded him, making Dean want to bang his head against something. Son of a bitch, He had forgotten that, how had he forgotten something which before he had always taken for granted?

"Neither do I, but I must say squirrel, you're not a bad cook. We'll make a housewife out of you yet." Crowley interrupted with a smirk as Dean glared at him. He was not a friggin' housewife alright? He just liked to nest now he had a home. Perfectly normal in his mind.

"Dean is a very good cook Crowley and he has taught me much about it." Castiel said before Dean could say anything. He would prefer they not fight over dinner, even if he found himself not being able to enjoy it as he once had. All he could taste were the molecules in it, and that really was a shame. Dean's burgers were his favourites.

"Ah feathers, has squirrel been giving you cooking lessons? How sweet of him." Crowley replied with a sickly sweet tone.

"Crowley shut up and eat." Sam responded before anyone else could. He did not want to hear them all bickering while he had his dinner thank you very much. All he wanted was to get the hex bag done and get Crowley out of their lives for good, though he did have to concede the guy hadn't been too bad to work with, you know, he hadn't tried to kill him or anything, so that was a plus he guessed.

"Now moose love, please, I was being nice." Crowley replied with a hurt look on his face which no one took any notice of.

"You're never nice Crowley." Sam responded with a smirk of his own as he delved into his brother's attempt at a salad, it wasn't great, but at least he had tried. He had to give him points for effort and all that.

"Well, true." Crowley mused as he finished off his burger and considered grabbing Castiel's, though he thought that probably wouldn't go down so well with squirrel. Therefore instead he turned his attention to inspecting the beer he had been presented with. What was it with the Winchesters and drinking cheap bloody rubbish? Though taking a sip he was at least glad to see they hadn't put any holy water in it of anything, just to piss him off. He wouldn't put it past Dean to do that just because.

* * *

Once dinner was finished, Dean eating Cas' leftovers, he wasn't one to waste food after all, Sam finished sorting out all the ingredients. It was then decided it would be best he slept before he and Crowley put the spell together. He therefore left the other three in the library and went to his bed. He had a feeling he was going to need all the rest he could get for what was to come the next day.

* * *

A few hours later Castiel watched as Dean almost fell asleep in his chair, and it was a that point he decided that his love needed to sleep as well. He could watch over Crowley perfectly fine, and when Sam awoke he could join Dean in bed before they went off to face Abaddon.

"Dean, go to bed." He said gently smiling at the man when he shot up and forced his eyes open.

"Na, Cas. I'm fine." Dean replied trying to supress the yawn that was begging to come out of him. That really wouldn't convince Cas of his words. Of course when he turned to his angel and saw the look on his face he knew that nothing would convince Cas that he didn't need to rest.

"Dean you need sleep. Go. I will come to you when Sam awakes." Castiel responded simply pointing towards there room.

"Alright, I'll see you soon then." Dean gave in standing and moving towards Cas before bending down to kiss him deeply. One because he would not get the chance again before he fell asleep, and two cos he wanted to remind his angel of just what fun they had in their bed, and what fun they would have when he finally joined him.

"Goodnight Dean." Castiel said when their lips parted with a smile on his face for the hunter.

"Night Cas." Dean smirked before walking out of the room, and if he may have swayed his hips a little more than usual cos he knew Cas was watching, was there really anything wrong with that?

"Well at least I now know who wears the trousers in your relationship Castiel." Crowley said once Dean had left.

"We are equal partners Crowley." Castiel responded with narrow eyes. He did not want to discuss Dean with him.

"Of course, you just happen to be the one on top." Crowley replied with a smirk before he turned slightly more serious. "I'm glad you gave the boy a chance."

"I love him." Castiel responded simply. He remembered the conversation they had had the last time they had been alone together, when he had summoned Crowley to the dungeon to find out what was going. How much had changed since that time, it was strange it think it really wasn't that long ago.

"I know." Crowley replied with a shrug. Dean and Castiel were no longer any business of his, thank fuck. They had found each other, all he had to do now was make sure that neither squirrel nor moose died in the fight that was to come. "We'll make sure they are safe." He said voicing some of his inner thoughts to the angel opposite him.

"Of course." Castiel replied, trying to sound sure, but there was still a worry at the back of his mind that something would happen to Dean. That he would lose him somehow. No he couldn't do that, he wouldn't do that.

"Oh come on Castiel, if you and I between us can't bring them back, then no one can." Crowley responded hearing the tone and understanding the angel's fears. But he knew that while he may no longer be high on demon blood, if anything happened to Dean he would happily make a deal with Sam to save him and vice versa. What the bloody hell had happened to him that he was at this point? Because he knew if he did have to make any deals, it would not be for anyone's soul. Bollocks, he really was too close to the bloody Winchesters and their damn angel. He needed to get as far away as he could when this was done, it was the only solution he think of.

"That is what I am worried about." Castiel muttered at Crowley's words as he turned his eyes to the doorway Dean had left by.

There wasn't anything Crowley could say to that, so instead he stood, moving to where he had discovered the Winchesters kept their whiskey, if this crap could be given such a name, but it would do for now. So with that he grabbed two glasses and poured himself and Castiel a decent measure and sat back. Ready to pass the time until the Winchesters awoke, drinking in the silent company of the angel. Strange as that may seem to most, but he had seen stranger in his life and Castiel was more than just an angel, he was… well he was feathers.


	54. Chapter 54

**Hello my darlings. I would to thank giawinchester and Castielholmeshasthephonebox for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, a bit of fluff, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean lay in the bed he had got so used to sharing, just staring up at the ceiling. Before, in the library with Cas and Crowley he had been falling asleep where he sat, but now… now he was wide awake. He wanted to claim he had no idea why, but that would be a lie. And there really wasn't any point in lying to himself, even if he didn't want to think about the things going round in his head. Okay, concentrate on the simple, maybe then he could forget the rest. He couldn't sleep cos Cas wasn't with him. But he would be back in his bed when Sam woke, so there was no need to worry, he could sleep for a couple of hours without his angel right? Of course then the thoughts he had been trying really had to ignore started pushing in again. Telling that it could be like this for the rest of his life if Cas died re-opening heaven. But no, he wouldn't let that happen. He would make sure they found a decent angel, or better yet, he would be standing there with an angel blade at the ready if the dick didn't restore Cas.

But these were things he shouldn't be thinking about. They had Abaddon to defeat first. Oh yeah, that was a cheery thought. Who knew thinking of killing a knight of hell would be the more preferable option to get him off to sleep? Well at least they had a plan that both Crowley and Cas seemed sure would work, just as long as he managed to get the hex bag on the bitch. Because yeah, there was no way he would let Sam have that job. His brother was gonna stay as far away from her as he could possibly keep him. He did not want him getting hurt… or dying, again. He had had enough of Sam dying for the rest of his life thank you very much. So it would be him getting up close and personal with the biggest bitch hell had ever produced. Well now, that did sound like a fun time.

With that thought he groaned and rolled over, his eyes automatically going to the pillow which had already become Cas'. He wished he was here, if he was Dean was sure he would be able to sleep, or they could find another, more pleasurable way to spend their time. Yeah, think about all the things he wanted to do with his angel, and if it didn't help him sleep, at least it made his thoughts ones that gave him a pleasurable fuzzy feeling in his mind. It was with this in his head, thoughts of Cas' arms around him holding him close, that Dean finally found himself drifting off into a restless sleep.

* * *

Castiel had felt Dean's longing for him and it made him smile as he sat with Crowley, not drinking the whiskey he had poured for him. He wished he could go to him, but he couldn't not yet. And so he sat in silence and waited.

* * *

Sam woke about six hours after he had fallen asleep and all he wanted to do was roll over and go back to the land of oblivion, but he knew he had to get up and make the hex bag with Crowley. No, first he needed to get up and make coffee. There was no way he was facing that dick without some caffeine in his system. So with that thought Sam pulled himself out of bed, grabbed a quick shower and made his way to the kitchen to have an even quicker breakfast.

* * *

Castiel was waiting on tender hooks for Sam to come into the library. He had heard the man get up and shower, and he had smelt the coffee being made in the kitchen. So he knew it would not be long before he could join Dean in their bed, spend a few hours together before they had to get up and face the fight that the new day would bring.

* * *

As soon as Sam entered the library, and before he even managed to open his mouth to say good morning, Cas was gone. Just shaking his head Sam turned to Crowley.

"A bit desperate isn't he? You'd think they would have got all that sexual tension out of their systems by now." Crowley commented gaining his first bitchface of the day. Hmm, he wondered how many he could make Sam give him over the next few hours, because he was pretty sure he could easily get it into double figures, in fact if he tired really hard, maybe even triple.

"Let's get this hex bag made." Sam muttered deciding it best to not even comment on Crowley's words. He was here for one reason alone, so he could do it.

"Of course moose, whatever you say." Crowley replied gleefully, already thinking about how he could wind up the younger Winchester while they worked. It saved him from getting bored after all.

* * *

Castiel entered his and Dean's room to find his man curled up on Castiel's side of the bed with his pillow clenched tightly against his body and his face buried in it, as if he was trying to pretend that it was him. It was the sweetest thing Castiel had ever seen and for a moment he just stood there and looked at the man he loved. The man he hoped would not get hurt later that day. No, don't think about that. Dean would be fine, they would all be fine and they would kill Abaddon. And that was as far as he would think. So to remove all thoughts from his mind Castiel approached the bed and gently touched Dean on the shoulder, causing him to stir.

"Cas?" Dean mumbled blinking up at the angel in the trench coat who was sitting next to him.

"It's me Dean, move over so I can join you." Castiel replied quietly as he started to remove his clothing.

"Ummm, 'ky." Dean responded rolling over and letting go of the pillow so Cas could have his side of the bed back.

It did not take long for Castiel to strip naked, and therefore he was soon in his and Dean's bed, wrapping his arms around the man he loved smiling as Dean turned and snuggled against him. Oh yes, this was definitely the best way to spend the time before they had to face Abaddon. With that thought Castiel bent his head and placed a soft kiss on Dean's hair, before turning his head so he could rest his check against it, breathing in the smell of the man he loved.

And that was how Dean found them when he woke a couple of hours later. He wrapped in Cas' arms and his body almost on top of his angels, and Castiel's breath feathering across the top of his head, moving his hair gently.

Of course when he realised what position he was in Dean decided to put some of the thoughts he had the previous night into action. Therefore he moved his body with purpose so he was straddling the angel beneath him, making sure Cas knew exactly what he was planning, and hopefully would use his grace to prep him as he moved so Cas' cock was at his entrance. But he didn't say a word, just stared into the blue eyes he loved so much as he took a deep breath and pushed himself down, impaling himself on Cas, and thankfully doing it without any pain. It seemed Cas had got the memo then. Good. With that he decided to speak.

"Morning Cas." He murmured with a smile.

"Good morning Dean." Castiel replied before moving his hands to Dean's hips and pulled him up and then push him down again. Oh yes, he definitely liked this way of Dean waking, he liked the novelty of not having foreplay, though he enjoyed that part of their coupling immensely. This morning there time together was limited, but that would not stop them from fining pleasure in it.

So that was how they spent their time together, with Dean riding his angel driving them both to the peek in their pleasure while they stared deeply into each other's eyes, saying without words that they loved each other, that nothing would ever come between them. And even if they couldn't know what was going to happen later that day, they knew they had this, and it was more than enough of a reason to make sure they both fought hard to come home together. To be able to be here once more at the days end.

* * *

And out in the library Sam sat back with a made hex bag in front of him as he let out a sigh of relief. It was done. Time to get the show on the road, or at least it would be when Dean and Cas decided to get their asses out of bed at any rate.


	55. Chapter 55

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank giawinchester for the lovely review. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So sorry for the long absences, I was on holiday, but I'm back now.**

 **Anyway here is the next chapter, time to fight the knight of hell. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

The journey to the disused barn that seemed to have become the favourite place for the Winchesters to summon demons was full of arguments. Though in truth it was just the two humans in the front of the impala that argued, neither willing to allow the other to place the hex bag. Sam thought he had the right to do it, after all he had made the thing, but Dean refused to listen to any sort of reason. In fact Dean was very much in the 'my word is law' frame of mind and Sam knew he wouldn't win. Not that that stopped him from arguing with his brother. He didn't want to see Dean get hurt any more than Dean wanted him to be the one in the firing line.

Of course when they reached the barn Dean had won, being the more stubborn of the two. Then they ran into their next issue. Sam and Dean both wanted to draw a devils trap to stop Abaddon from escaping. But as Crowley pointed out, if they did that he wouldn't have any powers to help them either, and as it was planned that he would be the one to call the evil bitch, he really thought that this should definitely be bloody well taken into consideration. So, much against both the Winchesters instincts, they did not draw any kind of trap for the knight of hell, they both just hoped that Crowley and Cas would be trap enough.

So after all these 'debates' the four of them moved to their different positions to await Abaddon's arrival. Sam stood by the door with his gun filled with devil trap bullets at the ready, pointing towards the centre of the room, and towards Crowley who stood there with a smirk on his face while feeling rather weary about where Sam was aiming. In the demons hand was a bowl of blood. Blood that had be graciously, or not so graciously, donated by both Sam and Dean, neither willing to let the other be weakened more than them. Behind Sam and to the side Dean stood with the hex bag in one hand and his gun in the other, he had also loaded up with devils trap bullets, cos let's be honest, this plan could go downhill fast, and he wanted to make sure he was armed in some way other than the hex bag that 'might' work. Sure Crowley said it would, but did he really trust the words of the demon? Sam hadn't had time to research it to make sure it was kosha, so Dean being Dean, wanted to be prepared, just in Case. Opposite the Winchesters, in the shadows to Crowley's left stood Castiel with his angel blade at the ready. He did not want the knight of hell to know he was there until it came time to kill her, he just hoped that Crowley could distract her enough that the time between her arriving and he made his move did not consist of either of the Winchesters dying, though he knew if it did he would move before it was time, he would happily ruin their plan if it would save the one he loved's life or that of his brother. No he would not let any harm come to Sam or Dean.

Once he saw everyone was in place Crowley use the blood to contact his rival. It was time for him to persuade her to meet him, and if he had to let her believe he was willing to surrender to get her here, then he would, though he doubted she would fall for that. No he had a much better plan.

"Abaddon. I think it is time you and I met." He said into the swirl of blood in the bowl.

"Oh? And why is that Crowley? Have you come to your senses and realised that I am the rightful ruler of hell?" Abaddon asked into his mind making him roll his eyes at her words. And the Winchesters thought he was arrogant, please. She was so much worse.

"Do I look stupid to you darling?" He drawled in reply, he needed her to think she had the upper hand, even if he knew, if this worked as he hoped it would, she didn't stand a bloody chance.

"Do you really want me to answer that?" Abaddon asked with a sneering laugh. I means seriously? Crowley was nothing to her. She could beat him, even if he did have the power of hell on his side. She was a knight of hell, trained by Cain himself. Crowley could do nothing to her.

"Be my guest, but I think it would better to have this conversation in person, don't you?" Crowley said in answer to the rhetorical question. He needed to get her here, preferably without any backup.

"I will not come to whatever trap you have arranged Crowley, it will not work, I am stronger than you." Abaddon responded with all the arrogance and power of one who knew she had more power than the thing she was talking to.

"Then why not come? Surely you are strong enough to defeat any trap I have set." Crowley replied with a crafty smile on his face. Oh yes, do come and join the party I've arranged especially for you.

"Why are you calling me?" Abaddon asked with confusion as she heard his words. What was he up to now?

"We need to talk." Crowley replied with a sigh as if he hated the words he was speaking.

"There is nothing to talk about, I will defeat you, and I will bring hell onto earth." Abaddon replied instantly. She had no need to talk to the man who spent his time making deals. That was not he way of hell. No the point was to bring evil and suffering to all humans.

"Oh? Even with the angels falling? I mean seriously? You want to fight them on your own? Go right ahead darling, I'll make sure that you are remembered, as the foolhardy demon who felt she was stronger than the armies of heaven. It will be a good lesson for my subjects to learn I am sure…" Crowley responded with a shrug. Take that you bitch.

"You are proposing we join forces to beat the angels?" Abaddon asked cautiously making Crowley smirk. Got ya.

"If you want to know what I propose love, you'll have to get you delectable derrière to me." With that Crowley cut the connection and his smirk grew even wider when he felt the shimmer in the air as Abaddon arrived before him. Oh you foolish woman, you just fell for the oldest tick in the book. But you will learn, even if it is now too late for you.

"What is your plan Crowley?" Abaddon asked crossing her arms and glaring at him. She had made sure he didn't have a mass of demons waiting for her when she arrived, in fact she was in the belief he was alone, thanks to Castiel to hiding the other three present from prying eyes.

"This." Crowley replied, though he made no move to do anything. Instead Abaddon heard the crack of a gun being fired behind her and she turned swiftly to see how much she had been betrayed by the demon in front of her.

Sam pulled the trigger on his gun at Crowley's word, but before the bullet could connect with the one he had aimed at Abaddon turned and blasted him into the wall. Oh yeah, that happened far too much for his liking, though at least she didn't have him pinned there, her concentration had already gone back to Crowley, if only he hadn't let go of his damn gun.

"You would team up with a Winchester? Just how far have you fallen?" Abaddon asked with distaste in her mouth as she looked at the smirking demon before her. Did he really think she would fall for that one twice? Was he insane?

"Oh darling, I have so much worse planed for you." Crowley responded with a sneer. Sam was nothing to what would come, and he would enjoy every second of the pain she was about to go through. Oh yes, this really was going to be fun.

Dean came running out of his hiding place, shooting his gun as he did so. He saw Abaddon turn to him and he realised that maybe he should have been stealthier about getting to the bitch. But she had just thrown Sam against a wall, he wasn't in the stealthy mood. He wanted her blood. When she flung her hand out, Dean knew he should be flying through the air, but he felt nothing. Well that was new.

"What are you doing?" Abaddon screeched turning on Crowley with anger in her eyes.

"What I need to to get rid of a bitch like you." Crowley replied his hand out as well to counter her force towards Dean. He knew the only way any of them would survive this was if the elder Winchester could get to the knight of hell, so he would do what he had to to make sure that happened.

Dean didn't stop to think about what was going on. He was moving forwards instead of flying backwards, and right now that was all he cared about. Moving quickly he threw himself on Abaddon's back which she had tuned to him, thinking Crowley was the greater theat. Oh how little she knew. With a quick stealthy move he had leant from years of pick-pocketing he slipped the hex bag onto the demon before shifting his position so he could fire a bullet right between her shoulder blades. He wanted to do more, but it seemed his time was up. Abaddon howled at the feel of the bullet entering her skin, and something else. She didn't know what it was, but it hurt her, reduced her powers. But she was still a knight of hell, therefore it took little of her remaining energy to grab the man from her back and fling him with force against pillars which supported the upper balcony of the barn. Dean smashed through them, causing all that the pillars supported to rain down onto his limp form, his last thought as he flew was son of a bitch, and then blackness overtook him and there was nothing.

* * *

Sam had watched his brother run and he knew it was a foolhardy action. He was ready though, when Abaddon flung Dean he would get up and maybe try to get the hex bag from Dean, either that of distract her until his brother could try again, hopefully with more stealth this time. But when he saw both Crowley and Abaddon hold up their hands he got worried, or he did until he realised that Dean hadn't stopped moving towards his target. Crowley was doing what he had promised, he was helping them. He watched with a confused mix of feelings as he brother jumped on Abaddon's back, half of him was in awe at what he was doing, the other half was terrified because of the stupidity of it all. He could only sit there and watch as Abaddon flung Dean away as if he weighed nothing, he could only sit there and watch as his brother crashed into the pillars and lay motionless under the debris. No, this couldn't be happening. How had Abaddon had the power to do that? He wanted to run to his brother, check he was a live, but he couldn't stop his eyes from returning to the bigger threat. There would be no way to save Dean if he died trying to recues him. And so he turned back to the two demons in the middle of the room, though now the scene looked a lot different to what it had been before. It seemed Dean had planted the hex bag, and it was working as advertised. Well wonders never cease, Crowley wasn't lying. With the knowledge that Abaddon was being taken care of, Sam made his slow way round the barn, trying to get to his brothers side.

* * *

Crowley had watched Dean get flung away from Abaddon, but there was nothing he could do to lessen his fall, not if he wanted enough power to take on the bitch in front of him if Dean had failed in what he was supposed to do. Of course as he looked back he saw Abaddon fall to her hands and knees and he knew that Dean had indeed been successful. The hex bag was working, and reducing the knight of hells power. Now it was up to Castiel to finish her, and there was no way he wouldn't stand there and watch that happening.

* * *

Castiel had stood and watched Sam get thrown against the wall, but he also saw that the man was conscious, and as such summarised that Abaddon thought nothing much of him, instead concentrated on Crowley. He was glad Sam was not hurt, but he worried about what Dean would do seeing what she had done to his brother. He did not have to wait long to find out. He watched Dean run at Abaddon with a shake of his head, that would never work, but when he saw Crowley nullifying the knight of hells power towards the man he smiled. He knew how much it would take for the demon to do that, just as he knew that Crowley had done it in a rather instinctual fashion, not that he would ever admit to it. Of course his smile soon slipped from his face when he saw Dean crash through the pillars. He tried to see if he was moving, but he could not. He reached out with the connection he had with the man he loved and felt a frightening emptiness. Dean. But no, he couldn't rush to him, he had a job to do first. The sooner Abaddon was dead, the sooner he could get to the man he loved. The man he hoped was still alive. No he had to be, Dean could not die. So instead of going to the one who was hurt Castiel turned to the one who had caused him the pain. With a stare that would send most being in this world and all others running for cover, he turned back to the demon before him and found her on her knees, it was good enough.

Stay strong my love, I'll be there soon, he thought as with anger in his eyes he marched towards the one who had dared hurt his hunter. It was time to end this.


	56. Chapter 56

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Awerry, castielholmeshasthephonebox and spnfankat81 for the wonderful reviews.**

 **So I decided I had been mean enough with the cliffhanger at the end of the last chapter, so I wrote you all a new one. I mean what else to do on a Sunday afternoon while watching the Olympics right? Well it's Sunday afternoon for me. Of course then this chapter went somewhere I had not planned, but oh well. I hope you like it and promise I will try to be less mean next chapter.**

 **Anyway enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Abaddon had no idea what was happening to her, she felt pain, and a loss of power. She fell to her hands and knees, she couldn't stop herself even if she tired. What had they done to her? What had the Winchesters and that repulsive salesman done to her? How could they, those that were bugs to be squashed under her feet, do anything to her? She raised her head, planning on spiting words of vengeance to the repulsive little demon, but what she saw made her eyes go wide. Because there in front of her was no longer just Crowley with a smirk on his face, but an angel, a very angry angel at that.

"Who are you?" She sneered trying to keep up a front, but it came out more as a grimace as she spoke through gritted teeth at the pain that shot through her. She had no idea what was going on, but what she did know was that this angel was not an archangel, and with heaven closed for business, he could not harm her. Or least, not normally, but now with this pain? Was she vulnerable to him? No, surely not, she was a knight of hell.

"I am the one that will kill you." Castiel growled grabbing her head so she couldn't try to escape his vengeance. He then moved behind her, using his hand to pull her up so he plunge his angel blade through her heart, while pushing his grace out of his hand so he could smite what was left of the evil thing in front of him. He tried not to use it all, thinking that he may need to save Dean, but he also knew he had to do this. He had to make sure this bitch was dead. Make sure she never tried to hurt the ones he loved again.

As soon as he felt her die in his hands he let her go, dropping her meat suit without thought as he turned to where he hoped Dean was. He saw Sam moving cautiously around the mess, pulling away some of the debris from the top of the pile, planks of wood and a small bale of hay.

"Sam…" Castiel said, not finding himself able to ask the question that was on his mind. Was Dean alright?

"He got buried Cas, I'm trying." Sam replied trying to keep his voice even, even if he did want to scream that he couldn't get to his brother. He had to do this the right way, he couldn't just pull things out without a plan, what if something heavier fell on Dean and hurt him even more? I mean he already knew Dean had to be unconscious, he wasn't responding to anything he said.

"Out the way moose." Crowley said approaching the wreck Dean was hidden under.

"Why?" Sam spat at him. Crowley at least was one person he did not have to nice to.

"Because I can't exactly sweep away the debris from squirrel with you standing on it now can I?" Crowley asked with a roll of his eyes. What did Sam think he was going to do? Surely he had proved he wasn't trying to hurt any of them, this time at least.

"Fine. Do it." Sam said after a couple of seconds of thought and his eyes connecting to Cas' who just nodded. If Crowley used his power to uncover Dean, that would save his for healing him. Because he was not dead, he could not be dead. No Castiel could not believe that Dean was dead.

Crowley made sure Sam was far enough away and then he swept his hand towards the mess on the floor, making it all crash against the far wall, earning himself another of those delicious bitchfaces. Oh how he was going to miss seeing that look on the moose's face.

Sam said nothing about Crowley's idea of clearing the debris out of the way, however much he wanted to. No he needed to get to his now unburied brother. Moving quickly Sam was at Dean's side at the same time as Cas.

"Is he…" Sam asked not able to voice the question just as Castiel hadn't been able to. Sure he could move his fingers and check his brother's pulse, check to see if he was breathing, but he was really reluctant to do that. He didn't want to find nothing when he did so. He wanted Cas to tell him everything was going to be alright, that Dean was going to be alright.

Rather than answering Sam, Castiel took a deep breath before he lowered his hand to forehead. What he felt made him breathe out in relief.

"He is a live Sam."

"Oh thank god." Sam uttered as he sagged back on his heels, getting out of Cas' way so he could save his brother.

Castiel on the other hand knew it would not be that simple. It had taken much for him to smite Abaddon, even with stabbing her, and Dean was very weak. He was close to dying, but Castiel would not let him, no matter what it cost the angel to do so, he would save his love.

Therefore gathering the remainder of his grace he pushed it through his hand, searching and finding the grace inside Dean and using that to strengthen his own. Using it to guide him to the most life threatening injuries. He healed the puncture Dean had in his lung, and stopped the internal bleeding that was trying to drown him. He did all he could to correct the broken ribs and elbow, though all he managed was a very basic fix. Dean would have to take time to rest and recuperate before he went on any more hunts. He then moved the remained of his grace to his head. Dean had not been able to protect it when he went flying it seemed, and as such had gained a slight fracture to his skull. But what worried Castiel most was the swelling of his brain this caused. This could kill him Castiel knew if he did not bring it down, but it was so hard. He could feel himself flagging, he didn't have the power to do what was needed. He needed more.

Opening his eyes he turned to Sam with his intense blue eyes.

"I need your help Sam." He growled though everyone there could hear the tiredness in it.

"What can I do?" Sam asked his words echoed by the Crowley in his head. He did not want Dean to die, though he refused to look too deeply into the why. He would blame feathers, it was much easier.

"I need power." Castiel replied with a sigh. He didn't have the energy to talk and to save Dean, it was one or the other.

"Power? How can I help you with that?" Sam asked completely confused. Crowley on the other hand knew exactly what Cas needed.

"He needs to touch your soul moose. It isn't pleasant, but it will recharge his grace." Crowley said loud enough for all to hear as soon as he worked it out. It was his first real contribution to the conversation.

Castiel nodded at Crowley's words, suddenly thankful he was there. That he could explain what he needed for him.

"Do it Cas. If that's what you need to save Dean, do it." Sam stated simply. He didn't care what it took, as long as he had his brother back.

At his words Crowley moved from where he had been standing to get behind Sam and grabbed his arms.

"What the fuck?" Sam stuttered trying to fight the demon off of him.

"You need to stay completely still Sam, or this will kill you." Crowley growled with rare seriousness. He didn't want Dean to wake up only to find Sam dead, no doubt the older Winchester would find some way to make it his fault, and he would prefer not to die at the hands of an irate squirrel.

"Fine." Sam grunted still not happy with being held by a demon, but if it would save Dean, then so be it.

With his words Castiel turned to him and reached out his hand, pushing it into Sam's chest causing a cry to escape his lips. Sam found his body wanted to turn away from the pain, but he couldn't let it. This was for Dean, and for Dean he would do it.

Castiel revelled in the power he felt touching Sam's soul for a second before redirecting it towards Dean, towards his brain swelling, bringing it down, bringing him back to them. It took all he had, but Dean was worth it. And when he was done he couldn't stop the smile that spread across his lips as he removed his hand from Sam's chest and started to fall into blackness.

The smile was due to the last word he heard. It was his name said in the voice he loved so very, very much. Dean was awake and well enough, and that was all Castiel needed to know to be happy. What happened to him did not matter, Dean would live, and that really was all he cared about.


	57. Chapter 57

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank giawinchester,** **Awerry, cerridwenjones, spnfankat81 and Castielholmeshasthephonebox for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So it seems I just can't stop writing this story at the moment, so sorry to any of you who are reading my others as they are being somewhat neglected. Anyway I promised I would be less mean in this chapter (though I am still feeling rather melancholy with my writing, sorry). I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean felt himself coming back to the world and he forced his eyes open. He needed to make sure Sam and Cas were alright, make sure they had managed to kill that evil bitch without anyone getting hurt. Pulling his eyes open he breathed a sigh of relief when the first thing he saw was the blue of his angel's eyes, "Cas," he breathed with a smile. Though the smile soon disappeared as he watched Cas' eyes close and the angel slummed over next to him, what the hell?

"Cas? CAS! What's wrong with him?" Dean asked pulling himself into a sitting position and ignoring how the world seemed to waver as he did so. He had been unconscious it was normal for things to waver slightly. He was fine, It was Cas he needed to worry about right now. With that thought he turned to pull Cas into his lap, notcing a slight twinge in his elbow as he did so, but it was nothing he couldn't cope with. He needed to find where Cas was hurt, needed to know so he could fix it. He had to fix it, he couldn't lose Cas.

"He's fine squirrel, just exhausted himself saving your pretty little head." Came the reply but it wasn't from the one Dean expected to speak. It was drawled out in Crowley's British accent making him turn to look at the demon who was standing a little too close to Sam for his liking, what had he missed while he was out?

"What? What are you talking about Crowley?" He asked confused and pissed. He was fine, so how had Cas exhausted himself saving him? What was Crowley on about now?

"You were close to death, feathers decided he couldn't live without you so decided to save you. Therefore he is now in need of little TLC. Take him home, wrap him up in your bed and give him time to recover. He'll be fine. As for me, my work here is done, all deals finished and complete. Toodle-oo boys, I hope we don't see each other for a very long time." Crowley replied before he teleported himself away, he didn't need to know what was going to happen next. The Winchesters and Castiel were not his concern, it was time for him to raise a little hell as it were. And if he felt a smidgen of worry for the ones he was leaving behind, it would only be because he wanted them to be able to get the angels back where they belonged, and it had nothing to do with any bloody feelings he might have for that group of men. Nothing.

At Crowley's words Dean's jaw dropped open, he nearly died? How in the hell could he not remember this shit when it happened to him. But shaking those thoughts from his mind he turned back to the angel he had in his arms and stroked his face, awed that Cas would risk so much just for him. It was crazy, but Dean knew he would do the same for Cas any day of the week. He would do anything to save the one he loved, he just still found it hard to think that there was someone out there who would do the same for him. Because he loved him, Cas loved him. And while Dean thought these things his mind didn't even register Crowley's last words telling him his deal with the demon was done.

* * *

It had taken Sam some time to find his breath again after having an angel touching his soul. It really hadn't been the nicest experience he had ever had, but Dean was awake, and he was fine, and that was all that really mattered to Sam. When Crowley left he had turned to speak, but rather than say anything he just sat there and watched his brother cradling Cas in his arms with a bitter sweet smile. After all Dean was overly loving in front of him, sure he and Cas kissed and they were continuously touching, not to mention the flirting, but this, the look in his brothers eyes, this Sam knew Dean reserved purely for his private time with his angel. He knew he should be uncomfortable seeing it, or at least turn away and give his brother privacy, but he couldn't. It was like when you read your favourite book for the 100th time and suddenly discovered there was a whole chapter you had never read before. He had never seen Dean look at anyone the way he was looking down at Cas. Oh sure, it was similar to the one he saw whenever he got hurt, but there was more to it. Because Dean loved Cas in a different way to the way he loved him, and Sam just couldn't tear himself to turn away. I mean okay he knew Dean loved Cas, that wasn't in question in his mind, but it wasn't until now, sitting here watching his brother that it hit him what that truly meant. Because Dean had the same look in his eyes when he looked at Cas, as he used to have when he looked at Jess. It was heart-breaking and beautiful at the same time, and Sam swore then and there that he would move heaven and earth to make sure Dean never felt the pain he had when she died.

Of course he was pulled from these thoughts when he heard an ominous creak from the building they were in and Sam suddenly remembered that this probably wasn't the best place for all of this.

"Dean, we need to get out of here." He said making his brother look up at him with lost eyes for a second before they cleared and Dean looked around at where they were and turned into the protective older brother Sam had always known.

"Yeah, you're right." Dean replied standing up to stretch out his muscles and swaying slightly at the sudden elevation change, but he manged to get in under control. He could feel twinges and aches across his body which he guessed where the bits Cas wasn't able to fix. None of them where serious, though Dean knew he was gonna a sore son of bitch the next day, but he would be fine with that, as long as he had Cas with him he could cope with anything.

Once he knew he was stable Dean bent down, and gently pushing his arms under Cas, picked him up bridal style. Standing again he felt the world around him wobble, but he could do this. Cas had saved his life, it was time for Dean to return the favour.

"Do you want me to carry him?" Sam suggested gently, he had seen how his brother did not seem so very stable on his feet.

"No. I got him Sam, let's just get out of here." Dean replied with a glare at his brother as if just daring him to argue. But Sam wasn't about to do. He could understand Dean wanted to be the one to get Cas out, and that was fine with him. He just made sure he walked close enough to his brother that if he stumbled or fell he would be able to catch him.

Once out of the barn they made their slow way to the impala, and Sam opened the doors so Dean could lay Cas down on the back seat. He expected his brother to put him there and then get into the driver's seat, but Dean surprised him. He climbed into the backseat with Cas and gently lay his head on his lap while he wrapped an arm around him so he wouldn't fall off the seat.

"I'm driving then." Sam muttered to himself as he made his way to the driver's side of the car. This was weird. He only ever drove when Dean couldn't, cos he was asleep, or too hurt, or dead, but okay. And how was that for a thought, the main time he drove the impala it was because Dean was dead. Yep, really cheery thoughts you're having there Sam Winchester, thinking about all the time your brother has died.

* * *

They drove back cautiously, Sam not wanting to go to fast in case it upset Cas. Once they were back at the bunker and Sam had parked the car Dean climbed out and pulled Cas once more into his arms. Sam watched carefully as his brother negotiated the steps down to the main bunker and walked silently behind him as he made his way to his and Cas' room. He watched as Dean gently laid the one he loved down on his side of the bed and then moved to sit beside him and run his hands through his hair and finally Sam felt like he really shouldn't be here anymore.

"I'm going to make you and Cas some sandwiches, put them in the fridge then go and get Kevin. Get some rest Dean." he said to his brother before turning and shutting the door on the two who loved each other and heading to the kitchen to do what he had told Dean he would do.

* * *

Dean sat on the bed and stared down at Cas. He hadn't moved at all since he had woken up, but he took comfort in the fact that he had seen him like this before and Cas had survived. He remembered the time when he had nicknamed him Mr Comatose when he had taken them back in time to save their parents from Anna. God that was so long ago. So much had happened since. But that didn't matter, what did was making sure Cas was comfortable while he recharged, and even if he was an angel at the moment and didn't really notice, Dean did, and he cared. So standing, he quickly removed Cas' tie, shoes and socks, and then pulled off his pants. He wanted to take of Cas' trench coat too, but he didn't have the energy to pull the guy up and do it, so instead he moved to remove his own clothing, before climbing into their bed and curling into the man he loved as he pulled to cover over them both.

And within minutes Dean was fast asleep with his angel at his side.


	58. Chapter 58

**Hello my darlings. I would to thank giawinchester, Raheem, Awerry and Castielholmeshasthephonebox for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean woke feeling blissfully warm and for a second he forgot all about what had happened, all he knew was that he was in Cas' arms, just where he wanted to be. But then it all came rushing back and Dean sat up quickly, hoping against hope that he would be greeted by the beautiful blue eyes of his angel, but as he turned to Cas' face he saw nothing. Cas still had his eyes closed, and he hadn't moved from the position Dean had lain him down in. At that Dean sighed and turned his eyes from his angel. He had no idea what to do. He didn't want to leave Cas alone, but he knew he couldn't spend all his time sitting in this room waiting for him to wake up. It could take him days for his grace to recharge, right? So what now? It was at that point Dean's stomach decided to make itself known and Dean realised he needed to eat. He was still feeling kinda weak, and food would do him good. With that in mind he turned back to Cas and pressed a gentle kiss to his unresponsive lips before climbing off the bed and heading to the kitchen to see what his brother had left him.

He found the sandwiches easily, they were sitting together on a shelf in the fridge, on two separate plates and covered in Saran Wrap. Grabbing the first one he came to Dean turned to take it back to his room. So at least he could sit with Cas while he ate. Could sit with him and try to think of a way to get his angel back to him.

It didn't take him long to devour the food. it wasn't half bad considering Sam had put nasty green stuff in it, or at least that was how he saw the lettuce, but once he had pulled that healthy crap out, it tasted pretty good. Of course now he had nothing to distract him from the unconscious angel in his bed.

"Hey Cas. You got your ears on?" He asked gently as he moved to stroke his hands through the one he loved hair. He knew Cas wasn't gonna answer, but maybe if Dean formed his words like a prayer his angel would hear them and come back to him. It was worth a try at least.

"I miss you man. I know you used up all your angel mojo to save my ass, thanks for that by the way, but I want you to come back now okay?... I need you, Cas." At the end of his prayer Dean waited for some sign of life from the comatose body next to him. But nothing came. So with another sigh Dean kissed Cas' forehead before he lay back down next to his angel, wrapping his arms around him in the hopes that having him close would help speed up the process and bring him back quicker to Dean's side.

* * *

Sam had collected Kevin from the motel room they had left him in, and gave him a slightly abridged version of what had gone down in the warehouse as he drove them both back to the bunker. He neglected to mention Crowley's involvement in the plan, deciding it would be for the best, especially as it seemed that Crowley wouldn't be around anymore. He had said all the deals were done after all. So there really was no need to mention the king of hells involvement in, well, any of it.

He was glad to see the young prophet was looking better than he had before they dropped him off. It seemed his time away had done him good. Now if only Cas was awake by the time they got back to the bunker then everything would be fine, but Sam didn't hold out much hope for that. it was going to take a while for Cas to recharge his grace he was sure, just as he knew that while Cas was out of action Dean would not leave the angels side. It was going to be down to him to make sure that they all ate and slept enough. He was going to have to be Dean for a little while. But he could do that, he could look after his brother and Kevin no problem.

Once they got back to the bunker Kevin went straight to his room and Sam made his way to the kitchen, to see if a) Dean had actually eaten the sandwich he had left him, and b) what they had in that he could make dinner out of. No correct that, make a dinner Dean would eat. He smiled when he saw a plate missing from the fridge and decided to leave the other one alone. You never know Cas might wake up at some point and be hungry.

Moving round the kitchen he realised there were many different things he could make, but he wasn't sure if Dean would actually eat any of them. Therefore he decided to just go and ask his brother what he wanted. At least then he could always look up a recipe online if he needed it. And Dean knew what they had in, so it really was the best solution in his mind.

Getting to Dean and Cas' bedroom door he knocked quietly not wanting to wake Dean if he was asleep, but it seemed he didn't have to worry about that as Dean opened the door to him.

"Hey Sammy, what's up?" Dean asked trying hard not look like he was worried for the man he loved, though he didn't open the door so Sam could see the unconscious angel on the bed, even if he knew he was there.

"I was wondering what you wanted for dinner?" Sam replied smiling gently at his brother. At least it looked like Dean had got some sleep while he had been away. That was good.

At Sam words Dean rubbed the back of his neck as he thought. Kevin and Sam were back in the bunker and he needed to make sure they were fed, and he didn't trust his brother not to just give them both rabbit food. "Right. I'll be out in a bit to cook." He finally said.

"No need Dean, I'll do it." Sam responded immediately, he didn't want to take Dean away from Cas. He knew his brother would want to stay by the angel's side. He could look after everyone for Dean.

"I ain't letting you near my kitchen Sam, I don't trust you not to make it healthy." Dean grumbled but a smile appeared on his lips at Sam's words. His brother was trying to help him, but in truth he knew if he had to stay in this room watching Cas not move for much longer he would go crazy, either that or stop being able to convince himself that Cas would wake up.

"You know that makes no sense Dean." Sam replied with a chuckle at his brother. He was such a mother hen sometimes in was funny.

"Don't care. You are not cooking dinner, I am." Dean growled with narrow eyes. Nope he was never letting Sammy in his kitchen, I mean he put healthy green crap in his sandwich, god knows what he would put into their dinner if Dean didn't watch over his shoulder.

"Okay fine, what are we having?" Sam replied in defeat. He knew there was no point in arguing with Dean when he was like this, and quite frankly he was rather glad that he didn't need to cook.

Dean thought for a moment running through what they had in the way of food in the bunker before hitting on the perfect answer to Sam's question.

"Chilli?"

"Sounds good… how's Cas?" Sam responded after a slight hesitation, he was pretty sure he knew the answer, but he wanted to hear it from Dean.

"The same." Dean replied in an even voice, he wasn't gonna say anymore. There was nothing more to say.

"Well, give me a shout if you need any help." Sam nodded understanding before he turned to make his way to the library to see if he could find anything out about how long it took angels to recharge their grace.

"Will do." Dean replied shutting the door. He was about to turn around when a voice from the bed behind him spoke, freezing him to the spot for a second.

"Hmmm, I like chilli."

Dean unfroze then, turning as quick as he could so his eyes could land on the body on the bed. "Cas?" He whispered in the hope that he hadn't just imagined those words being spoken in that deep gravelly voice he loved so much.

"Hello Dean." Castiel replied smiling at the man in front of him. He was so glad to see him whole and well, so glad to be able to see Dean once again. He had done it, he had saved his man, and now he had come back to him.

"CAS." Dean cried when his eyes locked with the blue ones he had started to think he would never see again. He couldn't help his response, he was so overwhelmed with relief and love he just launched himself at the angel in their bed and pulled him to him, kissing him as if is life depended on it. He needed physical proof that Cas had come back to him. That he was really there awake and okay. Needed to make sure he really did have his Cas back once again.

And Sam, who heard his brother shout as he walked away, ran back to the room and opened the door onto the scene. With a smirk on his lips he closed it quickly. It looked like dinner might be a while in coming, seemed to him that Dean has something else on his mind right then.


	59. Chapter 59

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank cerridwenjones, giawinchester,** **Destiel-in-a-nutshell, Awerry, RoaringHeartFallenAngel and Castielholmeshasthephonebox for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So as requested, here is the next chapter. Destiel-in-a-nutshell I did chuckle when your review came through, considering I was just about to sit down and write this. We obviously have like minds.**

 **Anyway here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Castiel was swimming in an unrelenting blackness. But it was not threatening, in fact it was peaceful and calm. It reminded him of when he had slept as a human, but without the dreams. He liked it and was in no rush to leave. Or at least he wasn't until he heard the prayer, the voice he loved more than anything begging him to come back to him. Dean. He would do anything for Dean, even leave this place of peace so he could once again be at his side. It was with these thoughts that Castiel started to fight. Started to push away the blackness in the hopes of being able to see the light once more, of being able to see Dean again and tell him he was okay, that everything was going to be okay. It took longer than he liked, but finally he was able to hear with ears rather than his mind, and he could see the subtle differences in light through his eyelids. He listened for a second before he opened his eyes, finding a smile appear on his lips at the conversation he could hear. It was Sam and Dean discussing dinner. It was so normal, but to him it was home. He heard the door close and decided now would be the time to speak, to open his eyes. He wanted it to be just him and Dean when he returned after all.

"Hmmm, I like chilli." He said softly smiling when he eyes connected to the green ones he loved so very much.

"Hello Dean."

After that all he knew was Dean in his arms, his lips on his as he kissed him as if he was necessary to his continued existence. Castiel tried to keep up, but it found it hard. He was not anywhere near 100%, in fact he was pretty sure that had he not heard Dean's prayer he would still be unconscious. He remembered what had happened, and he remembered what he had given to this man. But he wouldn't change any of it. The main problem now was that he could sense that Dean was still not at 100% himself, he had to try and stop his grace from reaching out for the man in his arms and heal him. Because he knew if he did that he would once again be claimed by the blackness, and he didn't want to leave his hunter. No now he was back with Dean he never wanted to leave him again.

"Dean, stop." He murmured in-between kisses, not having the energy to push the man away. Though if truth be told he wasn't sure he would do it even if he did. He didn't know if he could ever push Dean away from him.

"Cas? What's wrong?" Dean asked sitting up and pulling away from his angel as soon as he heard the words. Why would Cas want him to stop? Didn't he like it when they were together?

"I am not up to my full strength and my grace keeps fighting me." Castiel replied with a soft smile hoping Dean would understand that it wasn't that he didn't want him near him, it was just easier for him right then if they didn't get too close.

"What? Why?" Dean asked completely confused. Why was Cas' grace fighting him? What was going on with the angel he loved? And more importantly, how could he help him?

"Because it wants to heal you Dean, but I won't let it. If I did I would become unconscious again." Castiel explained with a sigh as he felt Dean remove all contact and move off the bed so fast it was as if he was fire. In the blink of an eye Dean was now standing across the room from him. He didn't want that. He didn't want Dean to feel like they couldn't touch, it was just… they couldn't at present do the other things they both enjoyed so very much. They would both have to exercise restraint for a while.

"No. You're not going anywhere, you need rest." Dean stated from his new place by the wall. As soon as he had heard Cas' words he had moved. There was no way he was going to let anything happen to Cas if he could help it. And it seemed as long as he didn't touch the guy, then he was helping. Not the way he would want to help, but he would do it. He would keep his hands to himself for Cas. Hell he would even move out of their room until his angel was better again. Yeah he could do that. He would move into Cas' old room… or maybe it would be better to bring a chair into here? That way he would be there if Cas had any bad dreams while he was resting.

Castiel watched the thoughts flitter through Dean's mind and he could guess what he was thinking. He did not want Dean to leave him alone in this room to rest. He wanted to be with the man he loved, it was why he had come back early after all. So instead agreeing to Dean's wish for him to rest he spoke.

"I would prefer to eat. At present I am more human than angel." He replied softly begging Dean not to leave him alone with his eyes.

"Okay, I'll go get you something." Dean nodded already making his way to the door.

"Dean please, I want to come with you. I want to be with you. I need you too." Castiel said to the back of the man he loved, making him stop mid step and turn to him.

"You heard me." Dean whispered not sure if it was a good thing or not that Cas had heard his prayer.

"I always hear you Dean, and I always will." Castiel replied with a smile as he pulled himself up into a sitting position. It was then he realised that while he was only wearing his boxer shorts on the bottom of his body, he had his trench coat and shirt on the top. "Though I think I should change if I am to leave this room." He murmured while frowning at the strange clothing arrangement.

"Yeah, sorry about that. Couldn't get your coat off." Dean chuckled a little self-consciously as he rubbed his neck.

"It is fine. Can you get me something wear?" Castiel replied slowing pulling his arms from the coat and then turning to undo the buttons of his shirt.

"Sure." Dean agreed moving to Cas' draws and pulling out a comfy pair of tracksuit bottoms and a tee. He then turned and offered them to Cas with an outstretched hand, as if he was contagious and didn't want to get too close.

"Thank you Dean." Castiel said taking them and changing. He sighed at the feel of the soft material against his body. It was nice and soothing, and it felt right.

Dean stood and watched the angel he loved get dressed, he watched as the smile at the feel of the clothes brought to his face and an idea came to him. If Cas liked the feel of his tee and pants, then there was something else nice and soft he could wear while he came with Dean to the kitchen.

"Here, put this on." Dean said grabbing the robe he and brought his angel and smiling as he saw the delight in Cas' eyes when he slid into the fluffy softness of it. Oh yeah, he really had chosen well with that gift. He stood there for a few seconds just enjoying the look on Cas' face, enjoying watching him do something other than lie on their bed out of it. He was so happy to have Cas back, and he didn't care how long it took for his angel to become healthy again. He was gonna be at his side, watching and helping in any, and all ways, he could.

"Let's go to the kitchen. I don't want Kevin and Sam to go hungry because of me." Castiel finally said, breaking the silence of the room as he opened his blue eyes and smiled at the look of love Dean was giving him.

"They'll be fine. You take as long as you need." Dean replied simply. His brother could wait for dinner, he could wait for Cas to be okay to move.

"They may be, I on the other hand, am very hungry." Castiel responded standing carefully so he didn't sway and show just how weak he was to Dean. He knew he would be fine, but he also knew his man would be very protective of him. It was what Dean did, he took care of everyone else, but the truth was all Castiel really needed was to be able to see that beautiful smile, and those gorgeous green eyes whenever he wished. All he needed to get better was Dean.

At that Dean nodded turning to open the door for Cas to walk through and then staying at his side as they made their way to the kitchen. He wanted to make sure he would be there if Cas fell, and he was completely unaware of how much his actions mirrored those of his brother when he had carried Cas out of the warehouse. No, he just wanted to be there for the one he loved if and when he needed him to be.


	60. Chapter 60

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank Awerry and Raheem for the lovely reviews.**

 **So I know this chapter is short, but it is the last in this angsty/mushy part and I didn't want to further the story on the end of it. I have also found myself feeling sorry for poor Sam being all alone, hmmm, maybe I will have to find him a girl at some point, we'll see.**

 **Anyway I hope you like this chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

 _'All this feels strange and untrue,  
And I won't waste a minute without you.'_

 _Open Your Eyes – by Snow Patrol_

* * *

Dean guided Cas to a stool at the breakfast bar before he moved to the fridge silently thanking his brother for his forethought in making both him and Cas food. Once he had it open he pulled out the second sandwich which was just where he left it. Pulling of the Saran wrap he put it in front of the angel he loved. It would keep him going until dinner was ready in Dean's mind. Of course before he even thought of starting the chilli he went to their coffee maker and proceeded to get it going. He knew how much Cas loved his coffee after all, and if this was all he could do, then he would do it.

Once he had everything he could think of to make Cas comfortable on the go he turned and started on the chilli. He chopped onions and garlic, and fried the mince, without thought to his audience. He had long ago got used to Cas watching his every move, and right then, after the scare he had had with the angel unconscious, Dean was more than happy to know he was being watched by him. He didn't even break his stride when the coffee beeped telling him it was ready. Instead he moved and poured a cup, placing it in front of Cas, who was eating his sandwich, before he went back to work.

He was happy that every move he made was noticed and registered in Cas' mind. It was a strange new development in their relationship, a cross between the past and the present. Because normally he would have Cas cooking with him if he was in the kitchen, showing him just what to do. But now Cas couldn't come anywhere near him, it reminded him of times past. Of other times when Cas had just stood there watching him with his intense stare. At the time Dean knew he had felt uncomfortable, but knowing what he did now, he realised that what Cas was trying to show was his feelings for him. And that was something he could never get enough of from his angel. Cas' love was like a blanket over Dean life making it seem so much more than he had ever thought it would be. Sure there was going to pain and danger, but with Cas at his side, it seemed that that paled in his mind. The overwhelming feeling he had was love. The love he shared with Cas which was just for the two of them. It was theirs and no one else's, and no one would ever be able to take it away. He briefly felt sad for Sam. Because it had always been his brother and him against the world, but now he had Cas and Sam had no one. But maybe this was a good thing. Sam hadn't wanted this life, maybe now he could get out, find his own Cas, now that Dean had found his angel. That thought startled him. He had never considered the idea of not being with Sam, but now he had Cas… he knew his brother needed to find his own love. He couldn't be selfish and keep him here when he had Cas. No, Sam needed to walk his own path, and for the first time, cooking chilli in the bunker kitchen, Dean realised that his path was not necessarily his brothers. They could go their spate ways and he would be okay with that. As long as they kept in touch and nothing happened to Sam that was. He had Cas, he would be okay.

* * *

Castiel watched Dean cook and marvelled in how his love moved. He was as seamless in the kitchen as he was on the battle field and he couldn't love him any more for it, though that didn't stop his heart from trying. Dean had been through so much, and yet here he was, happy to have his family and the ones he loved around him. It was the Dean he loved with all his heart. The one who finally had a home for his family, the one who loved them all so much. He knew that what was to come, what with him having to give up his grace to open heaven, would not sit well with Dean. But also he knew, that as long as he had him he would fight, and they would survive, because that was what Dean did. He was a survivor. He fought for what was right, and he was everything Castiel hoped he would be when he became human again. Having this time where he wasn't touching the man he loved, wasn't thinking thoughts of what they could be doing, it gave him a clarity he had not thought of since they had got together. Gave him a chance to watch Dean Winchester as he used to do, but now he knew why he had done it. Now he understood the feelings he felt towards the man, and he could do nothing but enjoy this chance to reflect, to study and to learn, this chance to just be with the man he loved. He could ask for nothing more in his live than being with Dean, and forgetting what might come Castiel just let himself be. Let himself watch Dean as he moved smoothly around the kitchen cooking dinner for the four people who lived in the bunker, just letting himself feel the comfort and family. Oh yes, this was definitely his home. His Dean was his home, and even if it had taken them both years to figure it out, they had now. They had each other and Sam, they had a family and they had love. And Castiel knew he had found his heaven on earth, in all senses of the words.


	61. Chapter 61

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank WickedPiscky, horsegirl2430, Destiel-in-a-nutshell, Awerry,** **giawinchester, cerridwenjones, Raheem and Castielholmeshasthephonebox for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

It was three days later. Three days where Dean slept in a chair by the side of his and Cas' bed. Three days where Castiel lived in his big fluffy robe, only ever really getting out of bed to eat, and even then sometimes Dean would bring his food too him. Three days of not touching and they both felt they were slowing going crazy. The staring had returned tenfold as it now held longing as well love. It was enough to drive Sam out of the bunker on the pretence of doing a supply run at least once a day, though luckily they kept it mainly in there room so he didn't see too much of it. Sam just wanted Cas to get better already so he they could finally open heaven, which had been the plan that had started to whole people getting hurt crap, and so he and Dean could release some of the sexual tension that had built up between the two of them again.

But then suddenly in the middle of the night of the third night Castiel opened his eyes and finally felt almost whole. On he wasn't one hundred percent, but he was well enough to be able to be with his hunter and that was all he really wanted. Without thought he quickly climbed out of the bed and moved to lift Dean from his chair, hoping not to wake the man as he gently lay him down on his side of the bed, before moving round and climbing back in. He then wrapped Dean in his arms and let his grace go, let it fix what remained of Dean's injuries as well as soothing the aching muscles the human had from sleeping in the chair. He held him as close as he could before closing his eyes again. He wasn't sleeping now, no he was just enjoying the pleasure of having Dean back where he should be. At his side.

When Dean woke he was slightly disoriented to find himself no longer in the chair and instead lying on the bed, still wearing his clothes. How did he get here? But then he turned to look into the beautiful blue eyes of his angel and he realised that it was Cas' arms around him. He was obviously better, and had wanted Dean near him as soon as he could. Dean certainly wasn't going to disagree with that idea. He couldn't help but smile at Cas and snuggle closer into the warm body as the arms he could feel around him tightened to hold him closer still. He had his angel back and he couldn't be happier.

"Good morning Dean." Castiel murmured when he saw that his hunter was awake, even if he did seem to be trying to burrow into his side. Not that he minded, in fact he loved that Dean wanted to be closer to him now he could be.

"Hey Cas. Guess you're feeling better?" Dean asked with a happy sigh.

"I am." Castiel responded simply smiling at the look of bliss Dean had on his face. Or course at those words Deans eyes opened once more as ideas flittered through his head.

"How much better?" he asked once more turning to look up at Cas, but this time with obvious desire in his eyes.

"Much better." Was Castiel's growled deeply, his mind following Dean's with ease as he moved so he could kiss Dean's lip. It was all the invitation Dean needed and it wasn't long before both hunter and angel were once more lying naked in bed together, experiencing the pleasure they could give and take. The joy that was to be had from moving as one with each other in the intricate dance of making love. Of being able to once more celebrate their feelings for one another in the age of fashion which they both liked so very much.

* * *

When they had finally finished 'rejoicing' in Cas getting his strength back, they both pulled themselves up and out of bed and got dressed. Castiel for the first time since he had awoken putting on something other than his robe. They then made their way out of their room to see who was around in the bunker, and what they could find for breakfast, or at least that was a major point in Dean's mind.

Grabbing some coffee and toast they both made their way to the library where unsurprisingly they found Sam and Kevin surrounded by books.

"Hello Sam, Kevin." Castiel said causing them both to turn to him with a small smile before they had to do a double take. Because there in front of them wasn't the angel they had come accustomed to seeing for the last few days, the one wrapped in his blue robe. No, in front of them, in a shirt and his black trousers was Castiel, angel of the lord, even if he was missing his usual blue tie and trench coat. There was a difference in the way he stood, the way he seemed to once more radiate power with a look of his eyes and they both knew he was back.

"Hey Cas. See you're feeling better." Sam replied with a genuine smile of happiness on his face, and he could glimpse out of the corner of his eye that his brother looked rather happy too. Though Sam decided he didn't want to think too much about the reason behind that thank you. What Cas and Dean did in their room was up to them. He did not need, nor want to know.

"Yes, thank you. I think we need to go over what we must do next." Castiel replied deciding now would be a good time to work out how they were going to find an angel who would support their plan to re-open heaven, and who would give him back his life once they took his grace. It was sad when he realised he couldn't actually think of any that he knew would do that. In fact the only angels he knew would have helped him were all dead, far too many at his own hands for his liking. But now was not the time to think of those things. No, now they needed to figure out another way of finding an angel, and they would need to find the right one.

"Cas, you have only just got better." Dean snapped upon hearing his words and seeing the ideas flitter through the back of his eyes. He had only just got Cas back, there was no way he was ready to lose him again so soon. Right now Cas still needed more rest, and Dean needed more time with him before he could consider the next great adventure for the Winchester family.

"I am not planning on doing anything now, but it would be good to have a plan for when I am ready. Do you not think?" Castiel asked tilting his head at Dean in that way of his, making Dean sigh as he realised that he really didn't have a choice.

"Fine. But whatever your plan. I ain't letting you go alone." Dean replied wanting to make sure that one point was clear from the off. He was not letting Cas go alone into danger, not now, not ever.

"I expect nothing different Dean, and I would like to have you there." Castiel responded with a soft smile. He loved Dean's protective side.

"Well then. Ideas anyone?" Dean asked sitting himself down at the table with Sam and Kevin so they could start to brainstorm a plan. Castiel joined them and they started talking, thinking, and getting Kevin to re-read the tablet to make sure they had all the information from it that they needed. The Winchester family, all its members new and old, were getting ready for the next big fight, though they really hoped it would be easier than the last.


	62. Chapter 62

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Awerry, Castielholmeshasthephonebox and giawinchester for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

They had a plan, and it was two days later that Castiel knew he and Dean were both well enough to do it. He could put it off no longer, even if he wanted to due to the chance that this would be the last time he ever spent with his hunter, with the man he loved with all his heart. But he knew he had to open heaven soon, the angels were starting to make trouble on earth for the humans, and he couldn't live with that when he had a way to make sure they returned to where they belonged.

But that did not mean he would go straight away. No before they left to do what he needed to do, he wanted to spend one more morning with Dean, sharing his bed and showing him how much he loved him. Giving him a good memory in case the worst happened and he did not return. It would not be a goodbye, but it would be his chance to show Dean just how much he loved him, how much he meant to him. One more time to make love as an angel to the man he had fallen for in every possible way.

"Hey Cas." Dean mumbled as he opened his eyes and found himself staring into the blue ones he loved so much.

"Hello Dean." Castiel replied gently smiling, but there was a sadness to it and Dean knew what it meant. Today was the day. Today they would go out and activate the crazy plan they had concocted. But he didn't want to say anything. Didn't want to bring those thoughts into the here and now. Because this could be their last time together, their last chance to share the love they held for each other, and he wasn't going to let anything spoil it.

With that thought Dean moved up so he could kiss Castiel with all the love and reverence he held for his angel. Trying to say everything he felt, everything there weren't words to describe, in that one kiss.

Castiel understood and returned it with equal awe and love before he turned so he could lie Dean down on the bed and he could shower kisses along his jaw and down his neck, stopping and licking and sucking at the places he knew Dean liked him to. Even nibbling along his collar bone in a way he knew drove Dean crazy. He then proceeded to carry on his ministrations with his lips, tongue and teeth, even as he hands roamed across the body below him. He wanted to make sure he kissed and touch every part of it, gave every inch of skin the love and devotion it deserved. He wanted Dean's skin and body to remember him, for this memory to sing not just in his man's mind, but his body as well.

Dean lay there running his hand through Cas' hair with his eyes closed as his heart rate sped up and his breathing quickened. But he didn't try and make Cas stop. He couldn't. There was something different in this today and he knew what it was. He may refuse to admit it, but he did allow it. Gave back to Cas what it was he knew the angel wanted from him just then, by letting him do as he wished with his body. Let him worship him. He only allowed one thought in his mind other than the feelings Cas' touch and tongue were causing to spiral through him, and that was when they were done and heaven was open once more and Cas was back in his bed, he was going to do the same thing to him. Give him a gift as precious as the one Cas was currently giving him.

Castiel kissed his way down both of Dean's arms, sucking each of his fingers so hard that Dean opened his eyes and he could see the desire clouding the green he loved. But he was nowhere near done yet. He traced the outside of the hand print he had made all those years ago with his tongue but the inside was one of the parts of Dean's body he would be avoiding for now. He had a purpose for that later. Moving on to Dean's chest he flicked his tongue over his nipples, biting down when they went hard and enjoyed the gasp of pleasurable pain he got from the man beneath him. But he didn't spend too long on them, moving his mouth down to Dean's ribs and kissing along the bones before using his tongue to run along Dean's abdominal muscles. He could feel Dean's erection against the side of his jaw, but again that was something he plans for later. So skirting Dean's groin he moved his lips and hands down Dean's left leg, making sure to kiss down the inside of his thigh as Dean automatically spread them so he could gain better access. And when he got to Dean's feet he again sucked hard on each of his toes meeting the man he loved's eyes and smiling to himself that now they seemed more black than green.

But still Dean didn't stop him as he moved over to the other leg and made his way back up to the part of Dean's body which really wanted Cas' attention. His mind was screaming at him, begging him to get Cas where he wanted him, but still it was also muted. The leisurely and paced way Cas was kissing him at odds to what it was doing to Dean's body. He had hoped that when Cas returned to the top of his thigh he would move to the next part of this seduction of his body, but all he did was pull away from Dean. Sitting back on his heels with a very human smirk on his lips spoke in his deep gravelly desire filled voice.

"Turn over Dean."

And Dean hearing that could do nothing but comply. There was no way in the world he could ever not do what that voiced asked of him.

Once Dean was lying down on his front Castiel returned to his kissing and touching, his ministrations of Dean's body, enjoying how Dean shivered when he ran his tongue down the sole of his feet. He once again bypassed Dean's ass taking only the time to bit each cheek before he kissed it better before he moved to his spine. Kissing his way up the vertebrae as his hands massaged the muscles either side, simultaneously relaxing Dean and heighten his desire.

By the time he had finally reached the back of Dean's neck he slowly lowered his own naked body on top of the man's below him as he nibbled on Dean's earlobe and them spoke once more.

"Do you want me to make love to you Dean?" He growled out softly, so it was not much more than air.

"Yes." Dean replied not even trying to hide the desperation in his voice. He wanted Cas, and he wanted him badly. His very skin was tingling from what the angel had just done to him and he wanted so much more.

With that Castiel smiled as he reached out for the lube. Once his fingers were ready he placed one at Deans entrance while keeping his skin in contact with Dean's as much as possible, moving only so far as it was required to get his hand in between them and between Dean's legs. He then slowly pushed his finger inside, keeping it the leisurely even pace he had been using.

Dean moaned at the feel of Cas' finger inside him while the angels weight still pressed him into the bed making it so he couldn't move. Couldn't help speed up the process of preparing him from his loves entrance. But that was okay. He would do it at Cas' pace. Because this was what Cas wanted from him, wanted to give him, and Dean could think of no better gift than the one he was currently receiving.

It didn't take long before Castiel had Dean ready for him, and he could feel the man below him starting to squirm, trying to move even if he couldn't. Pulling himself away from his man Castiel turned Dean around himself rather than asking him to do it. He wanted to look into those gorgeous eyes as he entered his man.

Once Dean was again lying on his back Castiel moved so he could cover his front and placing his own erection at Dean's entrance, he pushed in not breaking the contact with the man below him as he smoothly thrust in to the hilt.

"Cas." Dean breathed as he felt his angel fill him, he moved his hands and grabbed Cas' hair, pulling him down for a passionate kiss when he was completely inside. He needed to feel his tongue and mouth with his own, to show him how much he was enjoying this. To have one part which was not so in control. One part that showed the frenzy Cas had driven him too.

With that kiss Castiel broke. Gone was the measured seduction, and in its place was hard passion filled love. A desire to give Dean all he wanted, give it to him as he liked it. Show Dean all he wanted to with the movement of his body inside his. And when he felt himself coming near his own orgasm he moved his hand so he could stroke Dean's erection, grabbing it hard and pumping it in time with his own movements making Dean moan and move and generally lose all sense of anything but the angel he was with.

And when the time came for the big finish, Castiel, for the last time, moved his hand so that it was on top of the mark he had once made. One last time he would join his grace with that which remained in the man below him. One last time to find the organismic pleasure as an angel.

Dean had in eyes open when they came, and as such saw the wings reflected around the angel above him as they both reached the heights of their pleasure, and he couldn't stop himself watching how their reflection flared out as Castiel threw his head back and cried out his name. And then Cas' own name was on his lips and his eyes slid closed as pleasure took him over, took him up and washed over him before leaving him on a shore of bliss.

When Dean finally came back to the world it was to find Cas still on him, wrapped in his arms and legs, though while Dean was sweaty and panting, Castiel's skin was cool and normal. Damn angel. But he could also see his eyes were closed and he had a wide smile on his face. That look was one Dean wanted to imprint on his mind forever more, because it was a look of complete happiness, and lying there looking at it Dean made himself a promise. When this was over, he was going to make sure Cas had that look on his face every morning.


	63. Chapter 63

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have flowed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

The plan they had decided upon was deceptively simple in the end. They had had many arguments about it, mainly from Dean not liking it at all, but it was the only one they could come up with that would have at least a remote chance of success.

Dean, Sam, and Castiel would drive out to an abandoned warehouse, somewhere other than the place they had confronted Abaddon, mainly because that place was unstable after Dean had been thrown through the pillars holding it up. Once there Castiel would send out an all angel broadcast across angel radio asking for help in reopening heaven. If and when that call was answered they would, and this was the point Dean insisted upon, trap the angel in holy oil to make sure they would do exactly what was needed. Namely bring Castiel back and not let him die when they took his grace.

Dean still didn't like it. The angel could lie. He was trusting the person he loved's life to a stranger, and not just any stranger, to a dick with wings. Yeah he really didn't like it. But Cas was determined to go ahead, with or without him, and at least if he was there he could hold an angel blade to the asshat's throat until he saved Cas. Or at least that was his plan. He would not let the one he loved die. No matter what it took. Even if he had to call Crowley again and get him to save Cas he would. Though he knew the angel would be pissed at him if he did that, not to mention that he wasn't sure Crowley would or even could save Cas. It was his last resort plan, and one he hadn't shared with the others. Though he was pretty sure both Sam and Cas knew of it. In fact he would lay money on that being the reason Cas had insisted Sam come with them. So his brother could stop him from doing anything so stupid if it came to that. Though if Cas thought he would let Sam stop him, then he had another thing coming. But hopefully he wouldn't need to do that. Hopefully they found a nice angel who wanted to go home. Son of bitch, how likely was that? I mean really?

These were the thoughts that were running round and round his head as he laid out the holy oil, making sure it was an unbroken circle.

Sam on the other hand watched his brother like a hawk. He knew he didn't like this plan, and well truthfully he couldn't blame him. It wasn't his favourite either, but they had to have another angel to open heaven, and as Cas said, the only ones he knew and trusted he had killed, so… really they didn't have much choice. But he made sure he was ready to fight. Ready to defend Cas against whoever came. Because he knew there was no way he could let the guy die. Not only would they never get heaven open again if they did, but also it would kill Dean as well. So no. Cas dying really wasn't an option. Hell, he even thought he might help him call Crowley if it came to that. Or at least he wouldn't stand in his brother's way. But his role was to make sure it didn't come to that. That was why he was here, to protect his brother's heart and his friend. He could do that. He would do that.

Castiel stood and watched Dean. He could see Sam out of the corner of his eye preparing weapons and angel banishing symbols as a last line of defence. He didn't think they would need them, he hoped not, because if they did it would mean he was dead. He would prefer not to be dead. He knew there were many out there that blamed him for the fall, many of his brothers and sisters that wanted his head on a spike, he just hoped there was also those that would give him a chance. Give him the benefit of a doubt and listen to what he had to say. Those that would do as the tablet said they had to and save him once they had taken his grace. He had gotten Kevin to write out the words as they were written so he could show them to those who came. He just hoped it worked. There was nothing else he could do. It was in the hands of god now, and oh how that sentence made a cynical laugh escape him. God didn't care. Not anymore. No now it was in the hands of his children, not that that was much better. But it was what he had, what they had. He just hoped he had a chance to return to the man he loved when this was over. Hoped that their morning together was not the last time. That that had not been goodbye. He wasn't ready to say goodbye, not to Dean. But then he was pretty sure he would never be ready to say goodbye to him. Not now. Not after discovering what they meant to each other. Discovering the true depth of his feelings for his hunter. No, he would not let himself die. He would confront any angel that came, and if they would not listen, then he would kill them. And keep killing them until one who would listen came. He was stronger than most of those on earth now he had his grace back, and he knew things they did not. He did not just fight as an angel anymore, he knew the dirty tricks he could play if needs be. This would work. Everything would be fine. He would give up his grace and open heaven, and then he would return to his home with the one he loved and his brother. That was all. Just that. He would survive and be back with Dean in their bed by nightfall.

"Okay. It's ready." Dean said with a weary sigh as he finished the ring of oil. It was time for the show to begin. He just hoped that this wouldn't be the final act for any of them.

At his words Castiel moved to stand in front of him. Staring into the those green eyes he loved so much, he could not find the words he wanted to say, so instead of speaking he grabbed his man and pulled his head down so he could press their lips together in one desperate, what could be final, kiss. A kiss which said all they couldn't right then, neither of them willing to say goodbye. But they didn't have to. The kiss said it all without a word being spoken.

* * *

Sam watched on and his heart constricted as he realised what he was seeing. As the reality of what was about to happen hit him. But he couldn't look away. So instead he stood there, as witness to the love between his brother and his angel, watching the desperation and love invoked by that kiss. Watching the goodbyes and promises that were exchanged without a word. Watched as his brothers heart broke just a little, and determined that he would not let it break anymore. He would make sure Cas came back to him, if it was the last thing he did. Because Dean needed Cas more than he needed him. He was his Jess, and it was only right that if any of them should die today, it would be him giving up his life for his brother and the one who held his heart.

Castiel pulled out of the kiss when he sensed Dean needed to breathe, and looked once more into those beautiful green eyes which were begging him not to do this, even if he knew Dean understood he had no choice. With a soft smile he whispered quietly so only Dean would hear "I love you Dean Winchester. When I pulled you from hell you changed me in the best way possible and that is something I can never prepay. But I promise I will try. For the rest of our lives, I will try."

"Don't need to repay me Cas, just come back to me." Dean breathed as he rested his forehead against the angels for a second before straightening up. They needed to do this, get it over with and then they could start their life together properly, with no deals or angels in the way.

Castiel saw the resolve in Dean's eyes and nodded once before moving towards the door broadcasting his location and that he had a way to open heaven over angel radio repeatedly. All they could do now was wait and see.


	64. Chapter 64

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Awerry, Death Reader Skylar and Castielholmeshasthephonebox for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

It took a lot longer than any of them thought it would. But at no point during in the wait did any of the three there let their guard down. Which was a good thing when the angels finally burst through the door. Because the first ones, to answer Castiel's call were not the kind that were up for talking, or finding ways to get back home. They had come with only one intention. Revenge on the one who had done this to them. Revenge on the one who had destroyed the heaven they had known for eons by siding with the Winchesters. The one who had stood in the way of them having their paradise on earth, had caused heaven to fall into a civil war and then released the leviathan onto the earth. The one who had been the cause of throwing them from their home, the cause of their wings burning up and hurtling towards earth in fear and pain. They had come to kill Castiel, and no one would stand in their way.

This first wave of angels was a group of four, and when they saw the Winchesters with Castiel they sneered. Even better, a chance to kill the humans as well as the angel. What more could they ask for?

"Brothers, there is a way to return home, the angel tablet-" Castiel started to say even though he could sense that his words would fall on deaf ears. The angels in front of him were not here to help, they were here to kill him. This was not going to go well. Four angels against him, Sam and Dean were not good odds, but he knew they would fight with all they had, and he had to believe they would win. They had to, because one angel would have to come who would be willing to do as their father had written, right?

"We do not care Castiel and we are not your brothers. You are the reason for all the pain we have suffered, and for that you will pay." Said the angel who was at the head of the group. It was obvious he was the leader, though Castiel did not recognise him. He was not one he had ever interacted with in heaven.

"Yeah, I don't think so." Dean replied before Castiel could get a word out. He moved from his position by the ring of oil, where he had intended to trap any angel that came to help after Castiel had pushed them to him. But hey guess what? The first lot of angels weren't all into helping. Shocker. So it was time for plan B. Oh how Dean loved plan B, not.

"You believe you can defeat us? You mud monkey?" The lead angel laughed humourlessly, reminding Dean far too much of that dick Zachariah. What was it with angels and there god damn superiority complexes anyway? They were nothing but power hungry fuckers in his mind.

"Well you won't be the first dick with wings I've killed. So I'm gonna go with hell yeah, you son of a bitch." Dean responded with the same tone of superiority.

With that the fight was on. Two of the angel's spilt from the group making their way to Sam and Dean who were on either side of Castiel. The two remaining ones, including their leader descended upon the angel they had come to kill.

The fighting was fierce, and even though both Sam and Dean had angel blades they didn't have the power or the speed of their enemy. But they had been training with Cas, and they had fought angels before. They would not lose. They could not lose. So they gave it all they had, not even thinking about the fact that if they survived this they may well have to do this again. No their concentration was on the fight, and only the fight. That life and death battle that was so much a part of their lives.

Castiel fought with a single minded determination and with the training and power of the warrior of heaven he had been trained to be. A small smile appeared on his face as he did so, because from their moves he could tell that his opponents did not have the training he did. They had not come from a garrison. They were not warriors, and as such they would die at his hand. It took him only a few minutes to disarm one, meaning he was now armed with two blades, and only seconds later that one was dead at his feet. Turning to the leader he could see some fear in his eyes, and it just made Castiel smile even more. They should have known who they would be facing when they came through that door, but there arrogance had blinded them. A familiar trait in his former family. A trait he would use to his advantage whenever it was offered.

But just as he was about to strike he was distracted by movement out of the corner of his eye. It was Dean once more flying through the air, and that single moment that his attention was away from the fight and with his lover was all the lead angel needed to gain the upper hand.

"See Castiel, they are your weakness, and I will take great pleasure in killing them both. I just wish I could keep you alive to see it." The leader sneered down at him when he had his blade at his throat. But before he could make the fatal cut, a blade pierced him from behind right through the heart and the angel fell to the ground leaving Castiel to meet the eye of the one who had killed him. But he had no time to learn if this angel was a friend or foe, he needed to go to Dean. Without thought he turned his back on the newest arrival and moved as fast as was within his power to plunge his blade through the heart of the angel standing over the man he loved before turning to go to Sam's recuse, only to find the new, unknown angel had taken care of his adversary.

Turning back to Dean he could see his lovers eyes were trained not on him as they had been when he saved him, but on the unknown one there with them. The one who was standing over his brother with an angel blade in his hand. Right, deal with the new angel first. Check Dean over later. He knew his hunter would have it no other way.

"Drop your weapon." He said in a commanding tone. One he had not used for a very long time, but one that held all the power he did. One that was the tone of a leader.

At his words the angel turned to him and looked into his eyes for a few moments where time was suspended before he placed his blade gently on the ground next to him. Not that he stepped away from it. Castiel knew that if this did not go so well, then the angel would be able to pick it up and kill Sam before he could get there. His actions were nothing more than a show of peace. But a show was more than the others had given them.

"You are Castiel. You say you have a way to open heaven. I have come to assist you in any way you need, brother."

The unknown angel spoke in a measured tone making Castiel tilt his head. There was something about this angel. Something he couldn't quiet put his finger on. He did not recognise him, yet he held a power similar to his own. But it was tarnished and… broken? As if he had been through a hell of his own and the scars of that experience would never be removed from his grace.

"Why?" Castiel asked keeping his attention trained on his unknown quantity, even while he saw Sam carefully move away from the angel, making sure he put enough space between them that if necessary Castiel would have time to strike. Castiel was very thankful for the younger Winchesters forethought there.

"Humanity is strange. I do not understand. I wish only to go home." The angel said with a sincere innocence that spoke to somewhere deep in Castiel's own heart. It was how he had once felt when he had first come down to earth after pulling Dean from hell.

"Who are you?" He asked in the same commanding tone. He would not be beguiled by sweet words. He had fallen for that with Metatron, he would not fall for it again.

"I am Ezekiel."

"You lie." With that Castiel moved. This angel may have helped them, but he was lying now. He may want to help reopen heaven, but before Castiel told him anything g he would make him speak the truth.

The angel didn't even have time to pick up his blade before Castiel was on him, knocking him to the ground and throwing him with ease into the ring of oil that was already prepared. The ring of oil which instantly flared from where Dean had thrown his lighter with unerring accuracy.

"Who. Are. You?" Castiel growled out at the angel who was now on his knees trying to work out what had just happened and how things had changed so much.

The angel looked at Castiel, stared deep into his eyes through the ring of fire that surrounded him and knew he had no choice. He could not lie to this brother. The one he had heard so much about and yet no other in heaven had ever understood. The one who stood up to Lucifer and helped stop the apocalypse. He wanted to help him re-open heaven, to return home a hero. And maybe together the two outcasts of heaven could make it the way it should have always been. He did not have a choice. He would have to put his fate into his brother's hands and hope he would be merciful.

"My name is Gadreel."


	65. Chapter 65

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank Awerry and brandini861 for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

 _The Road So far…_

 _The angel looked at Castiel, stared deep into his eyes through the ring of fire that surrounded him and knew he had no choice. He could not lie to this brother. The one he had heard so much about and yet no other in heaven had ever understood. The one who stood up to Lucifer and helped stop the apocalypse. He wanted to help him re-open heaven, to return home a hero. And maybe together the two outcasts of heaven could make it the way it should have always been. He did not have a choice. He would have to put his fate into his brother's hands and hope he would be merciful._

 _"My name is Gadreel."_

* * *

"NO." Castiel shouted upon hearing the name. He couldn't believe what, or rather who, was in front of him. Couldn't process the fact that this was the angel who had let Lucifer into the garden. No wonder he hadn't recognised him, he had been locked in heavens jail for as long as Castiel had been fully grown. He could feel the anger the idea that he was out caused running through his grace as he stared through the flames at the one who had defiled Eden. The one who had been responsible for their father leaving. Everything that had happened had been because this thing in front of him sided with the devil himself. His anger turned his eyes bright white and made them start to glow. Made him want to reach across the flames and squeeze the life out of the being who had the audacity to call himself an angel.

"Cas?" Dean asked with alarm in his voice as he saw how his lover's eyes started to glow. That wasn't good. He needed his angel to calm down, and tell him who the hell it was they had trapped.

But Castiel wasn't listening to Dean. For the first time in a long time someone else had his complete focus, though not in a good way. That was because at the same time as Dean had spoken Gadreel did too, rising from his kneeling position to stand opposite his brother.

"Castiel-"

"Do not speak my name. Be glad that there is fire between us or I would strike you down where you stand." Castiel roared out, the power radiating the words around the room making the hairs stand up on the back of both Sam and Dean's necks. This caused the younger Winchester to start to slide carefully towards Dean in the hopes he could get his brother out of there if Cas went all vengeful angel on this guy.

"I wish to help." Gadreel stated raising his chin. He would not beg before the younger angel. They were brothers, and they were equals. Their family would do the same to Castiel as they had done to him if they caught him now. Surely he knew that. Surely he could see they were kindred. That together they could both redeem their names in the eyes of their brothers and sisters.

"we do not need your kind of help." Castiel boomed narrowing his eyes which still glowed, gathering his grace to him so he would be ready to do what he needed to.

Dean finally snapped. He had had enough of the conversation that made no sense to him. He needed to know if this angel was friend or foe, because if there was even a chance he would hurt Cas, then Dean would kill him himself, right freakin' now. Therefore ignoring his brothers alarmed look he walked over to Cas and grabbed his arm, not to try and move him, he knew he couldn't do that now he had his grace back, but hopefully in doing so he would get Cas to remember he was there.

"Cas. What's going on? Who is he?"

"This is Gadreel. The angel who sided with Lucifer to corrupt humanity." Castiel replied not taking his eyes away from Gadreel, though his voice and eyes did return to normal at the Dean's touch and the sound of his voice grounding him. Reminding him that the man he loved was here. He could do nothing to Gadreel while Dean was in the room. He did not want him to get hurt in the crossfire.

"I did not brother, I promise. He lied to me, made me believe he was there to help. You do not understand how he can twist your mind." Gadreel said, trying to convince the only angel who would give him a chance to do so, even if it was only because he needed him, that and the fact he had humans with him.

"I do." Sam muttered, thinking he had said it quiet enough that no one would hear. But he was in the room with two angels, and well, his adrenalin was running slightly high causing him to talk louder than he had anticipated.

"Sam Winchester, you understand?" Gadreel asked with a hint of disbelief and censure in his voice. His eyes swung to the younger Winchester, the one who was Lucifer's true vessel. Yes, if any one understood it would be him. But he had defeated Lucifer, he could not know the full power the angel could weld.

"Yeah." Sam replied simply crossing his arms and giving Gadreel one of his best bitchfaces for not believing him. But he didn't say anything else. He really didn't like thinking of Lucifer, ever thank you very much. So he wouldn't be elaborating now. He was here to watch Dean and Cas' back, that was all. Not make any decisions on who they trusted and what happened next. No, this was Cas' show, not his.

"It doesn't matter. You are lying now. Everyone knew of Lucifer's hatred and his feeling of superiority." Castiel said, dismissing Gadreel's words, Sam had managed to fight Lucifer in the end and win because he knew who the archangel truly was. So why had Gadreel not done the same?

"I was naïve, I believed his words. I want only to redeem myself by helping my family to return home." Gadreel replied with sincerity in his eyes as he tried to find the right words to explain what had happened. To give voice to the defence he had never had a chance to utter before.

"Cas? If he's willing to help, shouldn't we hear him out?" Dean asked cautiously, not wanting to piss his partner off, but knowing it would be very unlikely that they would find another angel willing to help them. If Cas wanted to do this, then they at least had to give this Gadreel the benefit of the doubt. Not that he wanted to, I mean he would be trusting this dick with Cas' life, but… there was something about the guy in front of him in that ring of fire. He reminded Dean of Cas. Of when they first met, confused by humanity, combined with the Cas who wanted to do nothing more than make up for all the mistakes he had made. Something about Gadreel made him begrudgingly want to trust him. Though whether that trust would go as far as with Cas' life, he wasn't so sure. Not yet.

At his words Castiel turned to stare into Dean's eyes, about to question his sanity, until he saw what he could read in them. It made him stop and think. Made him look at the situation without the anger he had been brought up to feel for the angel before them. Made him look at what Gadreel had done and compare it to his own misdeeds. He was not innocent after all, he could not judge Gadreel. And while yes, their father had, he had also left them alone long ago. His words and decrees no longer held the weight they once did with him.

"Even if he is speaking the truth Dean, it will never work." He sighed as he remembered the words he had read from Kevin's translation of the tablet. The words he had written down in his pocket for the angel who came to offer their assistance to read. Turning back to Gadreel with that in mind his eyes no longer held the fire they had before as he spoke. "You could never make it work."

Gadreel was surprised that by his simple words, Dean Winchester had managed to get Castiel to reconsider his feelings towards him. There was a connection between the human and his brother, but it was one he didn't understand. He was just glad that it was there and Dean had somehow convinced Castiel to give him a chance, even if he was saying that there was none. He could see that the anger was gone. He would overcome whatever perceived problem that stood in the way and prove to Castiel and the rest of their family that he was good. So taking a deep breath he asked the only question he wanted answered right then. "Why?"

"Because of this. Read it." Castiel replied simply moving towards the flames, though not getting too close, one because he didn't want to get burnt, and two because he didn't want the paper to catch fire.

Gadreel approach from the other side so he stood opposite Castiel, within reach of him if it wasn't for the fiery barrier between them. He then tilted his head as he read the words, translating the symbols written on the paper into a message which had come from their father.

 _To close the gates of heaven and expel the angels upon earth requires the heart of a Nephilim, a cupid's bow, and the grace of an angel who knows love. To undo the spell the angel must give up his existing grace to another angel who is pure at heart. The angel must be willing to sacrifice all he has known to return his family to their home. Be willing to walk the earth in a human form, and stand with those who serve god and his creations._

"What is it you do not believe brother? That I will not bring you back when I have taken your grace? Or that I am not pure of heart?" Gadreel asked as he proceeded what it said. It was an honest question, he needed to know what he would need to do to prove to Castiel that he could do as it asked. Though even he was not sure he would be what their father defined as pure at heart, but he was trying to redeem himself. Surely that would count would it not?

"Do I really need to choose? I don't believe you would do either." Castiel replied with a shrug, though in truth he knew that he didn't truly trust any angel alive to give him back his humanity, so Gadreel wasn't alone there. But he did not want to die if he was not sure that it would work. If he did not believe he had an angel pure of heart with him.

"What can I do to convince you of the truth of my words? What quest would you wish from me that would prove to you my loyalty to heaven and our family? I want to go home brother, I just want to go home." Gadreel responded in a lost sounding voice. He just wanted to return to heaven. Return to what he had spent millennia dreaming of. His home and his family.

"You have no home, not in heaven. Do you really think that they'll let you go free, even if it did work?" Castiel asked in honest disbelief. Even if this did by some miracle work, he knew his brothers and sisters would just lock Gadreel back up again. He would be better off staying on earth, hiding out down here and hoping that everyone forgot all about him.

"I have to try. I need redemption, just as much as you do." Gadreel answered with a shrug of his own. He knew his brothers and sisters, he knew there was a chance they would not listen to him this time either. But at least if Castiel allowed him to do this he would have a chance. He would have hope of returning to what he had wanted for so long. And that was so much more than he had had for so long, he would take it happily.


	66. Chapter 66

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank dragonfox123 for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Dean realised that they had come to an impasse, and what he really needed to do, was talk to Cas without the other angel listening in. With that in mind he turned to his brother and silently asked him to keep an eye on this Gadreel, while he turned to Cas and whispered in his ear to follow him. Then without waiting for a reply, sure Cas would do as he had asked, he walked out of the open door and round the corner so that they could no longer see or hear those inside.

"What is it Dean?" Castiel asked when he knew they were out of the range of hearing of Gadreel.

"Cas, we've gotta make a decision. We can't stay here for much longer, other angels will be on the way." Dean replied turning to look at Cas, hoping to see where his mind was at by reading the look in his eyes. But all he could see was confusion and uncertainty. It seemed Cas had no idea how to make this decision. He was gonna have to help him. Son of a bitch. That was the last thing he wanted to do, mainly because he really didn't want Cas to do this full stop. He did not want his angel to die.

"I know." Castiel responded with a sigh. He knew he had to decide, but he didn't know what to do. He was so used to following others, or being sure that his path was the right one, that feeling this indecision was new to him. He had been so sure when he suggested this plan, but now he had an angel who was willing to help, and that certainty seemed to have left him in the face of what could go wrong.

"So, what's the plan?" Dean asked causing Castiel return to their conversation and out of his tangled mind. Maybe talking it over with Dean would help, Dean always knew what to do. He was always so certain when he chose a course of action. He never wavered when it came to seeing it through.

"He is responsible for the corruption of humanity Dean. He is not pure of heart." Castiel said, mentioning the main sticking point in his mind. He would not mention the fact he was also not sure if he would bring him back. He was not sure any angel would do that, though it was part of the words from the tablet. He knew deep down that if he died then no matter who took his grace, it would not work.

"Technically that was Lucifer's doing though, right?" Dean asked with a wince as he realised he was playing devil's advocate, pretty much literally.

"Yet father locked Gadreel up for all eternity for it." Castiel countered with, though he could feel himself weakening. He did not want to put Dean or Sam in any more danger than they already were. He did not want them to have to fight and kill more angels.

"So you're saying there is no way he can help us?" Dean asked wanting to clarify. Because as much as he hated angels in general, the one in there, he didn't seem all bad. At least he wasn't a pompous ass like some he could mention.

"I do not believe so, no." Castiel responded, sighing again even as the words left his lips. Would he ever find an angel who would fit god's discretion of pure at heart? He doubted it.

"So, what? We kill him and wait for the next load of angels to come?" Dean suggested rubbing his hand over his hair and trying to keep any emotions from his voice. He really didn't want to have to fight anymore angels. He wasn't' sure he and Sam would survive another assault.

"I don't want him dead, Dean." Castiel replied with a frown at the idea. Gadreel was defenceless. No they could not just execute him. That would not be right.

"Then what Cas? Cos time is short here." Dean asked in exasperation. He needed his angel to make a decision, and make it fast.

"I don't know." Castiel growled out in frustration. He was no good at this.

"Okay. Do you think if you let him, he would bring you back? Cos he seemed pretty sincere to me." Dean replied in an even tone. There was no point getting pissed at the situation. It was what it was, they had to work with what they had here. And they had Gadreel.

"Does it matter? It will not work." Castiel snapped. Why was Dean so keen on letting that being take his grace? Did he want him to die? No of course he didn't. He was no doubt worried about Sam if more angels came wanting to kill them.

"But what if you tried? I mean if it didn't work you could just take your grace back again right? And then we'd wait for the next friendly angel that comes along. However long that might take. At least you'd have tried." Dean responded in a hopeful voice, not even sure if what he was proposing would work. I mean could Cas take back his grace for a second time? Or was there some sort of limit on that?

"Do you trust him that much Dean?" Castiel asked, though with curiosity rather than venom. He truly wanted Dean's answer. He wanted the man he loved to help him make this decision, and understanding what Dean was thinking would go a long way to doing just that.

"No. But I do trust he'll let me stand behind him holding an angel blade so I could kill him if he made one wrong move. In fact, I make that a condition of letting him have a go at his redemption or whatever shit it is he wants." Dean replied honestly. The guy had seemed truthful when he said he would do anything to gain Cas' trust. And letting him stand behind him armed, that would certainly be something.

"Why Dean? Why are you suggesting this?" Castiel asked though even as he did his mind was turning. Dean's suggestion had merit. If it did not work, and as long as Gadreel brought him back, then he could retake his grace and try again. That could very well work, and show that Gadreel was on their side. It would be useful to have another angel with them when they faced the next lot of his not so happy ex-family members.

"Because out of all the angels I have ever met, you're the only one I trust. No matter who it is we get to do this, I'm not going to be able to just stand there with a smile on my face as I watch them kill you. Not to mention I pretty sure most of your 'family' out there would sooner see us all dead. The three of us can't take on all the angels now on earth Cas. This could be your only chance to open heaven." Dean replied unconsciously echoing the thoughts in his angels mind.

At that Castiel stared at Dean with a small sad smile on his face and a soft kind of disbelief in his eyes. This was not how he had expected this mission to go. Not in any way. Though maybe he should be used to things not going to plan.

"What?" Dean asked when all Cas did was stare at him with that smile and soft eyes. What was Cas thinking now?

"It is just, I expected this conversation to be happening the opposite way round." Castiel replied with a shake of his head at how it seemed he and Dean's roles had been reversed. He had been so sure it would be him convincing Dean to let him do what he needed to do, not the other way round.

"You and me both." Dean responded with a small smile of his own at it all. He couldn't believe he was the one trying convince Cas to do this. But then again, he knew Cas was going to do it at some point, and there would never be any guarantee that the angel doing the deed would bring him back. But at least this one… well he seemed… honest. Or at least more honest than most.

At that thought Dean reached out and circled Cas into his arms, pulling him close so their bodies were touching and he could stare into those beautiful blue eyes. "I love you. I will always love you, and I hate the idea of standing there and watching you die. But I also understand your need to save your family. That is the only reason I haven't trapped you in the bunker and refused to let you go."

"They are not my family Dean. You and Sam are. But I do need to repair what I have done." Castiel replied softly bringing his hand up so he could caress Dean's cheek, stroking his fingers across the slight stubble there.

"I know." Dean whispered before bending to nuzzle his head into the crook of Cas' shoulder, just breathing him in. They stood there like that, as if time had stood still, both just revelling in the feel of the other. Neither wanting to let go, nor continue the conversation that could lead to them never being able to stand like this, together, again.

But Dean knew they had to. They couldn't stay there forever, no matter how much he wished they could. "So you gonna give it a try?" He asked pulling himself up, though not releasing the angel in his arms. He wasn't ready to let go yet. In fact he wasn't sure he would ever be ready, even if knew that he would.

"I don't really have much choice do I? You are right. There are many more angels who would like to see me dead than there are those who would help. And if it does not work, I can indeed try again." Castiel replied gently. It was time to take a leapt of faith, and hope that there was someone there to catch him.

"Okay." Dean agreed, but before Cas could pull away Dean bent his head to place a loving deep kiss on his angels lips. Refusing to acknowledge that this really could be the last chance he would get to do it. Refusing to admit that it was without a doubt a kiss goodbye.

It was a kiss Castiel returned with just as much love behind it. And when they finally parted and turned back towards the door and the two they had left inside, Castiel felt something settle inside him. This was the right choice, he was doing the right thing. With that clarity of knowledge in his mind, Castiel could not stop the calm smile that appeared on his face. He was ready.


	67. Chapter 67

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank dragonfox123, spnfankat81 and Castielholmeshasthephonebox for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Sam watched Gadreel watch Dean and Cas walk out of the warehouse. He watched him tilt his head as if he was trying to hear what they were saying, but he knew he couldn't when a frown appeared on his face and the angel turned to him.

"Your brother has a great power over Castiel. What is it?" Gadreel asked trying to figure out how it was that had Dean managed to get Castiel to do as he wished without thought.

"Cas fell for him. In every sense of the word." Sam replied with a roll of his eyes. I mean wasn't it obvious what power Dean had over Cas? It was the same one Cas had over Dean. They loved each other, even a blind fool could see that, right?

"I do not understand. Castiel is an angel." Gadreel responded with a confused look upon his face. Castiel had not fallen, so what did Sam mean?

"Yeah well not so long ago he was human." Sam replied with a shrug. It seemed that this angel was worse than a blind fool then.

"But that was due to the spell to cast the angels from heaven correct?" Gadreel asked still trying to understand Sam's meaning when he said that Castiel had fallen.

"Well yeah." Sam responded with a sigh. Why was he the one who was always left explaining things to people?

"Then I still do not understand. What power does Dean Winchester hold over Castiel?" Gadreel asked once more hoping to get a straight answer out of the human in front of him. Why could they not speak plainly? He really did not understand humans.

"They love each other." Sam stated simply.

"Love between a human and an angel is strictly forbidden." Gadreel replied rearing back at the idea that Castiel had broken one of the most sacred of rules. Castiel could not love Dean. It was not possible.

"Like I said. He was human at the time." Sam responded without any real interest in the whole strictly forbidden thing. He had seen plenty of things other angels had done which were morally questionable. They should be the things that were strictly forbidden in his mind.

"Ah. I think I understand now. Love is the strongest of the emotions father gave to all his creations, though humans feel it the most. Emotions go hand in hand with free will after all." Gadreel nodded in understanding. Castiel had fallen in love with Dean while he had been human. Yes that would explain how it was the human had such power over him now he was once more an angel.

"Yeah, I guess they do." Sam replied thinking about it himself now, wondering academically if that really was true. With that silence descended between the two. Gadreel not sure what to say to man who was Lucifer's true vessel, and Sam wanting to listen out for any dangers that might be coming their way. He needed to be prepared in case more angels arrived.

No, what he really needed was for Dean and Cas to get back here and get a move on. Decide if they were going to do this thing or not. And decide what they were going to do with their prisoner. It was at that point he heard the sound of footsteps, causing him to go on high alert, but it was only Dean and Cas coming back.

"Gadreel. If we try, do you promise to bring me back?" Castiel asked without preamble as he moved to stand in front of the angel trapped in the ring of fire once more. He needed to be completely sure, to hear the words once more from Gadreel's lips, even if he was a peace with his decision.

"I swear upon all that is good and true. Upon my own life." Gadreel replied quickly and sincerely. He had no thought of lying, he wanted to help.

"Glad you said that, cos I'll be making sure you keep that one." Dean responded with a cold glare in his eyes which to Gadreel promised he would die if anything happened to Castiel. Oh yes, he could see the love and fierce protection in the human now. He would put his mind at ease. He had nothing to fear from him.

"I have no wish to harm your mate Dean Winchester." Gadreel answered with a smile, even if his angelic hearing did pick up a snort coming from Sam at his words. What was so funny about what he had said?

"My what now?" Dean asked blinking in surprise at the angel. I means seriously, mate? Who uses words like that?

"Mate. You two are in love correct?" Gadreel asked now very confused after his conversation with Sam.

"Yes." Castiel replied before Dean could say anything else. They needed to get on with what they were here to do. His intent was picked up by Gadreel who turned to look at him with honesty as clear as day in his eyes.

"Are you willing to let me try brother? I promise that if it does not work I will return your grace to you without question, and stand by your side until you find an angel who is pure by our father's definition."

With those words Castiel waved his hand and the sprinklers above them turned on, putting out the fire around the other angel as his answer. It was time to try, time to put his trust in the fact that Dean would make sure he came back. He just really hoped he wasn't making the biggest mistake of his very long life.

Dean watched as the flames died down, as soon as they were out he moved to stand behind Gadreel. Placing a hand on his shoulder he placed the angel blade against his back, angling it so it would take only the smallest of pushes to embed it into his heart.

"One wrong move, and I'll kill ya. Got it?" Dean growled, all business now that it was time.

"Yes. I understand." Gadreel replied fighting the urge to move away from the weapon being held on him. He knew that he had to stand there and let Dean protect Castiel as best he could.

"Good."

When Dean was satisfied he turned his eyes to look into the blue ones belonging to his angel. The one he loved, would always love. This had damn well better work, or he was going to seriously cause some shit. He was so done with angels and heaven and all this crap. All he wanted was to be back at home with his brother and his lover and take the time to forget all about the world. Soon, soon they could return and Cas and he would be back in the bed they shared with nothing on their minds expect each other.

Castiel could feel Dean watching him, and he could feel the longing from the man, but he pushed it aside. He had a job to do, and he was ready to die. Taking out a bottle from his pocket he held it up to Gadreel.

"Do you know what this is?" Castiel asked narrowing his eyes at the other angel. He was placing a lot into his hands. He just hoped he was worth the trust he was currently giving him.

"I do." Gadreel replied taking the bottle from him. The bottled forged to hold the grace of an angel.

At that Castiel nodded letting his head fall back so that Gadreel would have access to his throat. To the place he would need to cut so his grace would leave his body and be placed once more in a bottle where neither he nor anyone else would be able to use it.

Gadreel felt an awe settle over him as he saw the trust his brother was putting in him by the action. Because from the way Castiel now stood he could no longer see what Gadreel was going to do. At that thought something else flowed through him. He could feel it well up inside, it was like peace, but it was also something more. It was knowledge that this would work. That he could be the one to open heaven. Because it suddenly became crystal clear to the angel who had been locked away for so long. It wasn't god who choose the angel who was pure at heart. It was Castiel. Castiel was the one who was placing his life in another's hands, and as long as he gave that angel his trust, then it would work.

With that thought Gadreel smiled as he brought his blade up, and with a whisper of enochian to his brother that was filled with gratefulness and awe, he slid the sharp point across the hollow at the base of Castiel's neck. He quickly brought the bottle up to capture the grace, not wanting any to escape and try to search out a new host. But it seemed the angelic essence of Castiel was more than happy to be confined in the bottle, swirling easily into it until it was full and Gadreel could place the stopper on the top. Once he was done he turned to the body that had fallen at his feet. Without hesitation he bent down and placed his fingers over the cut, closing it while breathing life into the body that had once been his brother, but was now as human as any angel could ever be.

As soon as he knew that Castiel would live he turned to Dean, who still stood behind him with the blade still pointed at his heart. But rather than say anything he held out the bottle of grace to him. After all who better to protect that which had once been the angel Castiel, than the man who loved him?

Dean took the bottle without thought, but his focus was on the body that was still lying on the floor, though he could see the rise and fall of Cas chest telling him he was alive. Thank god, or Gadreel, or whoever. Dean didn't care. Cas was alive and that really was all that mattered.

"Did it work?" Castiel asked looking to his brother who would be able to tell if heaven was open again. All angels would be able to tell that now.

"Yes." Gadreel breathed, feeling his wings heal on his back as the connection with heaven opened once more. He could hear in his head other angels crying out in joy at the knowledge that they could return, and some of the braver ones had already started to do just that. He wanted to join them. To go to heaven and tell the story of how he had helped to reopen the gates, but first he needed to make sure his brother and his humans would be fine on earth. It was the least he could do for the one who had given him his first chance in so long to return home.

"We should probably move." Sam said from his position by the door. He had moved there when they had started the ceremony, keeping his eyes out for anyone or anything that might have tried to approach. Of course that didn't stop him watching out of the corner of his eye, nor the wince he felt as he watched Cas' body fall to the ground. That was never good. He was very glad when he heard Cas' voice, and the reply from Gadreel. It was done then, heaven was open.

"Sammy's right. You good to go?" Dean responded looking down at Cas who was now sitting up.

"I am fine Dean." Castiel replied with a smile for the man he loved. He was human again, back to how he was before all this happened. And now he could enjoy the rest of his life with Dean. He couldn't wait.

Staring at Cas, Dean couldn't stop an answering smile from breaking over his face. He'd done it. Cas had done it, and now they were free. Or as free as hunters ever were. But that didn't matter. He had the man loved back, and there was no chance he would ever be letting go of him again. With that thought he reached out a hand and pulled Cas to his feet and then into his arms. Screw whoever was around, he thought as he bent his head and kissed Cas deeply. Kissed him to make sure he really was there, that it had really worked, and Cas really was alive once more.

Castiel kissed him back, only pulling away when he needed to breathe, chuckling to himself about the fact he needed to do that again. He felt so good back in Dean's arms, feeling his own heartbeat in time with the man he loved's. It was prefect.

Gadreel decided against tying to interrupt Castiel and Dean's reunion, and instead turned to Sam to say his goodbyes. It seemed to him his brother would be well taken care of by his human, and that was all that mattered.

"It was a pleasure to meet you Sam Winchester. And if you ever have need of me, just pray." He said sincerely smiling a little at the human. But he did not wait for a reply, instead he stretched out his wings and flew off to heaven, it was time to see what would happen now. To see if his family would give him the chance Castiel had done.

And Sam just rolled his eyes at the angels swift departure before turning to his brother and Cas to see they were still wrapping up in each other's arms. With a shake of his head Sam made his way back to the car, Dean and Cas would follow when they were ready. But surely they would be better off getting reacquainted in their bed back at the bunker, right?


	68. Chapter 68

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank spnfankat81 for the wonderful review. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, after this one there will be one, maybe two more before this story is done. Anyway I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

Crowley was sitting on his throne, going over the boring but necessary administrative aspects of being the king of hell, when the door into the throne room suddenly bust open and one of his minions ran towards him with excitement in his eyes.

This behaviour caused Crowley to raise his eyebrow at the presumptuous demon, but he would wait to hear what he had to say before he had him killed. It was the polite thing to do after all.

"Sire, the angels, they have left earth." The demon minion burst out desperate to get this intel to his king as soon as possible.

At his words Crowley smiled internally, he wasn't going to let it show to those around him, but he knew that if that had happened then the Winchesters and Castiel had succeeded in doing what they had set out to do. That was good. Things would go back to normal now with no pesky angels around trying to stop his demons from doing their jobs. Hunters he could deal with, angels were an annoyance he did not need. But he could not let on to those around him see what his thoughts really were. Therefore when he spoke, he had his usual sarcastic tone firmly in place.

"It seems the hardy boys and their pet angel have done it then. Hmm, maybe I should send them a fruit basket… or some cupcakes. What do you think?" He asked turning to the demon at his side who was still holding the contracts he had been signing. He enjoyed the look of alarm that passed over the demons face at having his opinion sort. They really were all sycophants, but he was the king of hell. He rather liked that aspect in them.

"Sire, I would imagine-" The demon started to splutter, trying to think of the right words to say that would make sure he wasn't killed by his king.

"Please don't. Leave me." Crowley interrupted. He didn't want to hear whatever it was the demon had to say. He needed to think. Because while he may have said it as a joke, he realised there was one thing he could give to the Winchesters, and it would cut all ties he had with them all.

Once all the demons had made a hasty retreat Crowley sat for a few more moments going over all the possible outcomes of what he was considering doing. Making sure it was the right course of action. Seeing the pros and the cons, though when the main pro was that the Winchesters would owe him one, then the cons really were outweighed. With that thought he teleported out of his throne room to make his way to the storage units no one knew he owed. He would give the Winchesters, Castiel and their little prophet boy a present, in the spirit of good faith, or something like that.

* * *

Kevin was pacing around the war room and to library and back again. The Winchesters and Castiel had been gone ages, and he couldn't stop himself from wondering if they would ever come back. If maybe it wouldn't work, or maybe they couldn't find any angels to help them and instead were all dead. He wasn't sure what he would do if that was the case. I mean how long could he stay hidden in this bunker if he was the only one left? But before he could try and plan for the worst the alarms in the war room went off once more, though this time he was less scared than he had been the first time he had heard them. Because now he knew what they meant, or at least what he hoped they meant.

Quickly making his way to the door he found himself once more locked in the bunker. The only thought he had as he went and grabbed the gun Sam had been training him to use, was that at least one of the Winchesters or Cas had better be alive. Because if not, he was going to die a really slow death trapped in this godforsaken mausoleum.

* * *

Dean, Cas and Sam drove back to the bunker, the ex-angel had the biggest grin on his face, which was mirrored by the one on the drivers. Sam just shook his head at the two of them, though he too was feeling pretty good. They had finished with all the tablet god crap, and now they could get back to doing what they did best. Hunting and saving people, though now it would the three of them doing it instead of just him and Dean. But he was okay with that. Cas had shown his worth the last time he was human, and if nothing else, he kept Dean out of trouble, mostly. No, Sam was happy for his brother and the former-angel slash man he was in love with. Life was good.

When they returned to the bunker it was to be greeted by Kevin holding a gun at them, though luckily he didn't fire it as soon as the door opened this time. Something everyone was grateful for. They didn't want to have to deal with bullet wounds right this second. They had to celebrate the angels returning to heaven.

Or at least that was what Dean decided, though after grabbing the whiskey and toasting with his brother and Kevin, he quickly pulled Cas away from the other two and towards their room. Sam could explain everything to Kevin, he and Cas had other things to keep them busy right then.

So Sam, after giving his brother a bitchface, for no other reason than he liked the normality of it, and reminding him that if he didn't get up in time to cook dinner he would do it for him and he might not like the result, turned and told the tale of Gadreel, and how they had returned the angels to heaven.

He had just finished when there was suddenly a knock on the door startling the two people who remained in the room. Pushing Kevin behind him Sam stood pulling out his gun as he made his way up the stairs. He did look briefly behind him to see if Cas or Dean had come out at the sound, but it seemed they hadn't heard anything, or more likely were too preoccupied to hear anything. Making his way to the door, he checked to make sure Kevin was out of the line of sight, yet armed, before he grabbed the door and flung it open. The sight that greeted him made his jaw drop. Because the person on the other side really was the last one he thought he would ever see, what with being pretty sure she was dead and all.

"Mrs Tran?" He asked gently to the tried and dirty looking woman.

"Sam, is Kevin here? Is he alright?" Mrs Tran asked her eyes widening in delight when she saw who had opened the mysterious door Crowley had told her to knock on. She had thought the demon was up to some kind of trick when he had come to get her and told her he was releasing her. And then he told her he had no need for her anymore she assumed the worst. But if she was with the Winchesters, then maybe there was a chance her son was too.

"Umm, yeah. He is." Sam replied still in shock as he opened the door fully and gestured for the woman to come in.

Kevin on the other hand, at the sound of his mom's voice, had come out of hiding and was standing at the bottom of the steps staring up at the woman he had thought Crowley had killed. How was she alive? What had Crowley done to her?

Mrs Tran made her way through the door cautiously, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Because she didn't think for a minute that this was really happening. Something had to be up, right? The king of hell did not just let people go. But when nothing came she carefully made her way down the stairs, swaying slightly from lack of food.

"Mom?" Kevin croaked out when she was finally on the same level as him, then without thought he moved and grabbed her, wrapping his arms around the only family he had ever known and thought he had lost. She was here, she was back. It was as if his prayers had been answered.

"Kevin, you know you have to test me first." Mrs Tran said with a sigh, wondering where both these two boys' heads were at. She could be a demon for all they knew, after all she had been held by Crowley for a long time.

"Right." Sam nodded before grabbing some holy water and tipping it over her hands, cleaning of the muck but doing nothing else to her. He then proceeded to do the other tests just in case, but when he confirmed she was indeed who she seemed to be, Sam and Kevin led her to the kitchen, so she could sit down and tell them what had happened to her, while Sam made her a cup of tea and a sandwich. He didn't bother going to get Dean, he didn't want to interrupt him and Cas, and well, his brother would find see who their latest house guest was when he finally got out of his room. If Dean had wanted to know, he should have come when she knocked on the door. For now he needed to concentrate on the reunited family in front of him. Though after he got the story, he did discretely walk away, giving Kevin and his mom time together.

And looking back as he walked out of the door he saw them once more in each other's arms, Mrs Tran comforting Kevin who had tears pouring down his face. Sam smiled sadly, not at the sight in front of him, but more the fact that now it seemed he really was the only one in the bunker without someone special.


	69. Chapter 69

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank Awerry for the lovely review. I would also like to thank those who have followed and favoured.**

 **So this is the penultimate chapter and I just want to take the time to thank all of you who have reviewed this story. It really helps to motivate me to write the next chapter. Also thank you to all of you who have put this story on alert. You are all amazing, and I am so glad you have stuck with me.**

 **Anyway enough from me, here is the chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

After having celebratory drinks with Sam and Kevin, Dean practically dragged Cas back to their room, wanting to do nothing more than rip his clothes off and confirm he really was there. That he was alive and with him and would be that way until they both died. Of course as he entered and started to take his jacket off, he felt the weight in one of the pockets. It was the bottle of grace that Gadreel had given him. Hmmm, seemed his plans on having long exhausting sex were going to have to wait.

"Cas?" He said turning to the former angel and not being able to stop himself from smiling when he saw the frown Cas had on his face as he tried to take of his tie.

"Yes Dean?" Castiel replied bringing his eyes up to the man he loved as soon as he had spoken. His hands dropping away from the piece of material that seemed to be glued together.

"Umm, Gadreel gave me this." Dean responded holding out the bottle of swirling grace to it former owner. An action that made Castiel recoil from him. Why did he have that? it shouldn't be anywhere on earth, if it fell into the wrong hands… it didn't bare thinking of what could happen if someone got a hold of the power that his grace contained.

"Dean. That should be in heaven where it would be kept safe." He growled out in his gravely tone. Not wanting to get any closer in case he found himself tempted to take it back again.

"Well it's not. So what we gonna do with it?" Dean asked slightly pissed at Cas' tone. I mean at the time he was given this, his mind was more on the fact that Cas was dead at his feet. He didn't really have time to think about what they were going to do with it when they got back. He was more interested in whether Gadreel would be bringing him back.

"I don't know." Castiel sighed, sitting down heavily on the bed. His feelings towards the grace were strange, because he knew it was part of him, but he also knew it was a part he did not want to return. He just needed to stay away from it.

"Okay, how about we hide it here, somewhere deep in the bunker? That way it'll be safe." Dean suggested wanting nothing more than to go and comfort Cas, but also knowing the former angel was trying to stay away from the bottle in his hand.

"Very well." Castiel agreed with a nod. Yes hide it away where it would never see the light of day again. It was all they could do now, hide it and hope no one ever finds it.

With that thought Castiel marched towards the door and started to lead the way deep into the bunker with Dean on his heels. The sooner they did this, the sooner they could get back to what they had been doing. And back to the life they had to lead together.

They finally found an old dusty room which had a key in the lock and was filled with bottles of… stuff. Dean had no idea what any of it was, but it seemed as good a place as any to hide Cas' grace. With that thought he shoved it onto the highest shelf, right at the back and then moved the other bottles in front of it. Turning to Cas he saw the one he loved nod in agreement at his chosen place.

With that they both left, Dean locking the door behind them and pocketing the key. He would make sure no one ever went into that room. And because they were so far down, they didn't hear the knocking on the door, nor know of their latest family member.

* * *

Once they returned to their room, Dean hid the key in one of his draws before turning back to Cas with a loving smile on his face.

"Come here." He muttered reaching out for Cas, pulling him towards him. But rather than placing a kiss on his lips as Castiel had assumed was going to happen. Dean proceeded to remove first the trench coat, then the suit jacket, before pulling at the tie and getting it free. When Cas was standing in front of him he wearing just his shirt and pants Dean smiled. He no longer looked like the angel Castiel, but the man he had learned to love. With that thought he did finally place his lips to Cas', letting the other take control as soon as they met. He was Cas' to do with as he wished, and he was happy with that.

Castiel felt the coat and tie leave him and it felt as if he was shedding the final parts that connected him to the angel he had been. Because he knew this time this was forever, and it had been his choice to make. He had chosen to become human once more, to give it all up and be with Dean. After all Dean really was all he wanted in this life. His new, so very short life. He didn't care how long it would last, as long as he had the happiness of being with Dean and his family, then they would be the best years of Castiel's existence.

When Dean finally kissed him Castiel didn't stop to think before taking the lead. Of using that as a way to show Dean how he truly felt about it while removing his shirt to reveal the tight tee underneath. Once done, Castiel pushed Dean towards the bed, it was time for them to make love once more, for the first time of the rest of their lives, as two men who loved each other.

The act itself was filled with the contradictions of fierce passion and tender touches. Lips and hands going everywhere as they once more explored each other's bodies without the aid of the grace. Castiel using Dean to ground him, to remind him of the joy of feeling it all through his skin and tongue. To remember what it was like to get hot and sweaty as he pushed inside the man who lay panting below him. Remind him of the oblivion to be sort by orgasming together. Crying out each other's names at that moment of pure pleasure, and then falling into each other's arms as you both came back to the world. Still trying to catch your breath even as you revelled in the feel of your sticky, sweat soaked bodies being pressed together as if you could become one in that moment.

It was perfect, and glorious, and so very human. Castiel loved every moment of it, but then so did Dean.

When they were finally able to speak only four word came out of the former angel's mouth. "I love you, Dean." he whispered into the chest he was lying his head on, listening the steady rhythm of the heartbeat below him.

And Dean smiling down at the messy black hair could do nothing but respond in the same vein.

"I love you too, angel."


	70. Chapter 70

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank horsegirl2430, Shannonisabanana and Castielholmeshasthephonebox for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So this is the last chapter, I just want to take the time to thank you all again for reading, following and reviewing this story. I have loved writing this, and I'm glad you have all loved reading it as much.**

 **Also the bits in italics are angel radio.**

 **Anyway for the last time, I hope you like this chapter, it is a long one. Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.**

* * *

When Dean and Cas came out of their room with the intention of cooking dinner, Dean was surprised and somewhat concerned to smell that someone else already seemed to be doing just that. And considering Sam was the only one who had much idea how to cook it would be safe to bet it was his brother getting dinner. That didn't bode well for his stomach, he and Cas would have to go out for some junk food after whatever it was Sam was going to try and feed them. Though sniffing the air Dean was shocked. Because whatever it was Sam was cooking, it smelt damn good. Just where had his little bitch of a brother been hiding his cooking skills, hmm?

Of course when he entered the kitchen his jaw dropped open. Because the one doing the cooking wasn't Sam, though he was helping, or trying to help at any rate. No the one cooking was a freshly showered Mrs Tran.

"What the hell?" Dean found himself snapping. How long had he and Cas been gone? Not to mention the fact he was under the impression that Kevin's mom was dead. So seriously, what the hell?

"Dean, good you're up. Sam told me you and Cas were taking a nap. Now do you have a strainer in this kitchen? Sam also told me you are the one who knows your way around in here." Linda Tran replied, completely unfazed by Dean's look of shock, though she would prefer not to go into how she was here right now. She had a dinner to cook for her family, her son, and the boys who had risked their lives to look after him.

"Yeah." Dean responded on autopilot getting the piece of equipment out of the cupboard still staring at the woman in wonder. "How are you alive?" he asked without thought of being polite, though he did register Sam moan his name in the background, his concertation was fully focused on Linda Tran.

"Crowley didn't kill me, he kept me prisoner." Linda finally answered though in a tone that said she would speak no more of it.

"Son of a bitch, I'm gonna kill him." Dean muttered his eyes narrowing as he thought of the self-satisfying king of hell. Damn that guy had gone too far this time.

"Well wait until after dinner please. In fact you and Cas can go and set the table." Linda responded without batting an eyelid at the death threat. It was time for food. Far more important in her mind right then.

* * *

Castiel upon entering the kitchen had decided it best to stay out of the way and therefore had moved to stand next to Kevin who had the biggest smile on his face as he once again watched his mom making dinner. But when he heard the woman's words he moved to grab Dean's arm and pull him towards where the plates were kept. "Of course, come on Dean." he said as he did so. Now was not the time to question this miracle, nor time to go off and try to start a war with hell, again.

Dean went with his lover, easily. The smell of the food was too good for his mind to stray from it for long. But later, he would get all the details from someone.

* * *

So the five of them sat down and started to eat. Dean couldn't help the noises of appreciation that came from his mouth, though Sam of course gave him a bitchface at how much it sounded like he was having sex with his dinner, while Castiel just smirked, he could make Dean moan much louder.

As a way to distract from Dean's table manners, or lack thereof, Linda turned the tables on the boys, wanting to know all that had happened since she had last seen them. She took the idea that Cas was now human in her stride, and when it came to his relationship with Dean she practically beamed across the table at them. Everyone deserved a chance to be happy, and if that was what they did for each other, then she was glad they had finally found the courage to be together. Therefore she made sure to tell them that, which in turn made Dean very embarrassed, though also secretly pleased. He was glad she accepted what he and Cas were to each other.

Linda then turned her mind to how Kevin was going to finish high school and go to college now he had finished his prophet duties. She had no intention of either of them moving out of the bunker, as long as the Winchesters didn't mind them staying, which they really didn't, but she also wanted him to do more than read the musty old books this place held. Kevin needed to use his brain and she did not want him becoming a hunter.

At her suggestion Dean was all for it, surprising Sam so much he managed to choke on his food.

"Dean, seriously?" He managed to gasp once he had recovered a bit. I mean any time he had suggested he return to school Dean had vetoed the idea, and then something usually came up, another apocalypse or something worse. So he had pretty much given up the idea of returning to the life he had had before. And to be honest he was okay with that. Hunting was what he did, he wasn't sure he would be able to walk away from it again. But the fact that Dean was okay with the idea of someone having a normal life? That was weird.

"Yeah, why not?" Dean replied with a shrug as he turned to look into Sam eyes, saying without a word that he would be okay if his brother wanted to do that too.

Sam didn't know what to say to that. He just… it was something he had stopped thinking about after he nearly died closing the gates of hell. The demons were still out there because of him, there was still evil he needed to fight.

"No reason. I think it's a good idea Kev." Sam finally answered turning back to his dinner, but not before making sure Dean knew full well that he wasn't going anywhere. After all, someone needed to make sure Dean and Cas didn't get themselves killed because they were worrying too much about each other and not enough about themselves.

Dean seeing the look smirked. He was glad Sammy wasn't leaving, even if he had come to terms with the idea that he would be okay if he did. Just because he would be okay with it, didn't mean he wanted it to happen. So yeah, he was glad Sam would be staying with him and Cas, keeping the family business alive.

* * *

That night, Castiel and Dean were fast asleep, wrapped in each other's arms, when Castiel suddenly sat up with a start on high alert. He had heard someone calling his name. Looking round the room he could see no one there, but still, he felt uneasy. Then he heard the call again and realised that he was hearing it over angel radio rather than with his actual ears. Turning that part of his mind to listen closer to the last remanence he still had of being an angel, he concentrated on the message.

 _"Castiel, brother please. Help me."_

He knew that voice, and he knew he could not say no. Therefore he turned without thought to wake the man sleeping at his side. He didn't even think of going out without Dean at his side.

"Ya whata who now?" Dean spluttered as he shot up at being roughly shaken, already reaching for his weapon when he realised it was just Cas.

"What's up Cas? Had a nightmare?" Dean asked running a hand over his face in an attempt to wake himself up enough that he could help his angel.

"We have to go, now." Castiel replied standing and moving to his draws and grabbing some clothes.

"Umm okay Cas, but… why?" Dean asked mirroring the other man's movements with his own. He would go wherever Cas wanted to go, but he kinda would like to know why they had to do it in the middle of the night.

"Because someone needs our help." Castiel responded making his way to the door with Dean on his heels as he tucked his gun in waistband.

As they moved down the corridor Dean banged on one of the doors as they passed. "Wake up Sammy, we got work to do." He shouted and when he heard a muffled grunt in understanding from inside he moved off to catch up with Cas who was already halfway to the car.

It wasn't even five minutes later that Sam fell into the back seat of the impala and just lay there for a few second as Dean started the engine and pulled out of the garage.

"Okay Dean, where at we going right now?" Sam finally asked blinking a bit. He hadn't thought when he heard his brothers words, just jumped out of bed and threw on some clothes, but now he had to wonder.

"Good question. Cas, care to share?" Dean asked as he drove through the dark night, though from the directions Cas was giving him he could guess. It would also explain why it was Cas was the one to raise the alert. It had just better not be some kind of trap the angels had laid for them, because if it was, he was gonna be so damn pissed.

"To the warehouse we called the angels too." Castiel replied confirming Dean's thoughts as he prayed to his brother and told him help was coming.

"Why?" Sam asked from the back frowning as the idea that they were on their way to meet angels woke him up like nothing else could. Well that was a lie, Dean had some very colourful ways of waking him up, but at least this one didn't include water or things being thrown at him.

"To help him." Castiel responded jumping out of the car as soon as Dean pulled it into park.

"Son of a bitch." Dean muttered as he too jumped out of the car and took off running after Cas with his gun and flashlight out. His angel should not be going in there without some back up.

Sam for his part had grabbed an angel blade from the trunk before following his brother. He wasn't stupid, there was an angel in there, and at least he would have a weapon that would kill pretty much anything. He could back up Cas and Dean if this was some kind of trap.

* * *

Dean made his way cautiously into the dark space, he could hear quiet talking from the centre and he knew it was Cas and whoever it was they had come here for. They didn't seem to be angry or argumentative, so he took the time to clear the rest of the room before letting his light fall to the centre. And there he saw Gadreel covered in blood and being held in Cas' arms. Son of a bitch.

"He gonna be okay?" Dean asked as he quickly moved to the other side of the angel, putting his gun away.

"He will be. But we need to move him from here." Castiel replied simply. He had seen the wounds, and they were all ones he knew that Gadreel's grace would be able to heal, as long as he had time and a safe place to rest.

"Right. What happened?" Dean asked turning to the angel in Cas' arms. He wasn't about to take the guy back to the bunker until he knew for sure this wasn't some kind of trap to hurt Cas.

"When the angels returned to heaven they dealt with Metatron, then turned to me. You were right Castiel, they were not willing to forgive me, nor would they listen to what I had to say. I ran for my life and came to the only place I knew it would be possible to find sanctuary." Gadreel replied weakly, smiling at Castiel and hoping that the Winchesters and his brother would give him a chance. He had helped them, he had resorted Castiel's life, surely that would stand for something with them, right?

"I am sorry. You can stay with us." Castiel responded without thought. He could not leave Gadreel like this, not after he had been shown to be pure in the eyes of their father. He had been forgiven for his sins, he deserved respect and freedom. Castiel would do all he could for the one who had brought him back. He owed him his life and… he was family.

"Cas-" Dean started to say in a questioning tone, but he found himself silenced by the look in those deep blue eyes. A look that clearly said I am doing this whether you like it or not.

"He is my brother Dean." Castiel stated simply, knowing that those were words Dean would understand. Dean knew he did not think of the angels as his family any more, but to call Gadreel his brother, that meant something, a lot more than it used to when he said it. Because the Winchesters had taught him what being a brother truly meant. It was time to show Dean how well he had learnt that lesson.

"Okay." Dean nodded. He could say nothing else. He loved Cas, and if he wanted to call Gadreel his brother, then Dean would treat him that way. But if the angel made one wrong move, he would kill him without thought or compunction.

At Dean's acceptance Castiel stood, dragging the injured angel up with him. When it became obvious Gadreel was finding it hard to walk Dean grabbed his other side, and they made their way out of the warehouse to the car where Sam was already holding open the back door, ready to help their newest ally inside.

* * *

Once they got back to the bunker Sam went on ahead to prepare one of the many rooms for the injured angel, as well as grabbing the first aid kit, just in case. But as soon as he was settled both the Winchesters left Gadreel with Cas, making their way to the kitchen in an unvoiced decision to have some coffee. They were both too wired to go back to sleep, and well, Dean didn't want to sleep without Cas anyway, and Sam was more than happy to keep him company.

"So we've got another angel." Sam said as he poured them both a cup of hot liquid.

"Yep, though this one can be all yours Sammy." Dean replied with a smirk for his brother as he waggled his eyebrows at him insinuating things that would never happen in a million years in Sam's mind thank you very much. Therefore Sam gave him one of his most classic bitchfaces as he responded the only way he could.

"Jerk."

"Bitch." Dean replied automatically before taking a drink of his coffee and speaking again.

"Seriously though, he's as clueless as Cas was when he first came down here. I already have my hands full with teaching Cas to be human, I can't take on Gadreel as well." He reasoned, hoping Sam would help him out. I mean he knew Cas would try, but Cas was still clueless about so much himself, it would be like the blind leading the blind if they left it all up to him. Plus he would never see his lover if he spent all his time teaching Gadreel about humanity.

"You sure it's just your hands that are full of Cas?" Sam asked with a smirk of his own, trying to repay Dean for his earlier remark, but when he saw the twinkle in his brothers eyes he realised his mistake.

"Well now-"

"No. On second thoughts, don't answer that." Sam said interrupting Dean before he could say anything, though it didn't stop the image popping into his head of Cas on top of brother. Oh god, he really needed the brain bleach right now.

"So you'll help him?" Dean asked noticing how his brother looked like he was going to puke. Served him right for asking really.

"Fine, but you owe me." Sam sighed. At least this way he would have someone to talk to when Dean and Cas were otherwise engaged. Yeah that would be good. Having someone to talk to, to go for a drink with, and maybe even discuss theology with. It would be nice to have someone who could become his friend. Who knew who he was and what he had done, and yet didn't judge him. Just like Cas and Dean didn't. Suddenly the idea of Gadreel there made Sam see the future in a different light. He would have someone to talk too to. Kevin had his mom, Dean and Cas had each other, and now, well maybe now he could have a friend of his own.

* * *

It took a few days for Gadreel to recover. Mainly because he had been cut off from heaven just as Castiel had once been, but unlike Cas the first time round, Gadreel had been held in prison for centuries. He knew how to live without full access to his grace.

Once he was better he talked to Castiel and they came to an agreement. Gadreel would stay at the bunker with them, become family, in return he would help them hunt, protect their ragtag family, and when the time came and they were all gone, Gadreel would take the bottle of grace from its hiding place and make sure it never fell into the wrong hands.

And so Sam started Gadreel's lessons in humanity 101. In doing so he found he did actually like the guy's company. He was actually interested in what he had to say, and wanted to know everything he could about what had happened in the world since his imprisonment. It was a refreshing change from Dean who would roll his eyes at him and call him a nerd, and Cas who spent most of his time staring at Dean.

Kevin and Linda took the newest house guest in their stride, Kevin just shrugged and Linda determinedly mothered him as she did with the others, though Dean did try to resist as much as he could. He could look after himself and his family thank you very much, though he did let her share his kitchen. She was a damn good cook.

As for Castiel and Dean they carried on what had started with a deal made with the king of hell. They continued to grow closer, loving each other more every day. Both enjoyed having their brothers with them, Castiel making sure to take the time to get to know Gadreel, while Dean was glad to see that Sam now had someone to talk to. His brother wasn't alone now, even if he and Gadreel were just friends. Sometimes a friend was what you needed.

So the new and extended Winchester family went forward doing what they had always done, saving people, hunting things, the family business, and they did it well.

The end.

* * *

 **That's it. I hope you liked it, and thank you again for reading and reviewing.**

 **Ta-ta.**


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